What is it like to be gay in the 70's and 80's

[hntnhole]

In the largest cities in the Midwest, gay life was much the same as outlined by others above.

Chicago being the mega-center of gay life, most gay guys that needed to move to somewhere other then where they grew up, moved there.  In the 'gaybor-hoods', the usual necessary shops, stores, etc were patronized by mostly gay men/women.  However, in the non-gayborhoods, there were plenty of gay folk too.  Not everyone lived in the thick of it all.  All the "near" neighborhoods/burbs (meaning, relatively close to Chicago-proper) had plenty of gay folks for neighbors, particularly along the elevated train lines.  Even when the various ethnic neighborhoods (mostly European immigrants) there were plenty of gay folks, if not bars, etc.  

"Boystown" (which was actually named "Lakeview") was ground zero though.  Tons of bars w/backrooms, gh joints, porn theatres, as well as cruisy areas along the lakefront parks. The worst part of any of it was finding parking at night. Walking from any of the fuckjoints back to your car you could stumble over a pair of guys fucking - and either join in or keep going - it was just not anything out of the ordinary (at night).  

Those were heady days for sure ... and I'm really grateful to have been there experiencing all of it.  

[PozBearWI]

1 hour ago, hntnhole said:

In the largest cities in the Midwest, gay life was much the same as outlined by others above.

Chicago being the mega-center of gay life, most gay guys that needed to move to somewhere other then where they grew up, moved there.  In the 'gaybor-hoods', the usual necessary shops, stores, etc were patronized by mostly gay men/women.  However, in the non-gayborhoods, there were plenty of gay folk too.  Not everyone lived in the thick of it all.  All the "near" neighborhoods/burbs (meaning, relatively close to Chicago-proper) had plenty of gay folks for neighbors, particularly along the elevated train lines.  Even when the various ethnic neighborhoods (mostly European immigrants) there were plenty of gay folks, if not bars, etc.  

"Boystown" (which was actually named "Lakeview") was ground zero though.  Tons of bars w/backrooms, gh joints, porn theatres, as well as cruisy areas along the lakefront parks. The worst part of any of it was finding parking at night. Walking from any of the fuckjoints back to your car you could stumble over a pair of guys fucking - and either join in or keep going - it was just not anything out of the ordinary (at night).  

Those were heady days for sure ... and I'm really grateful to have been there experiencing all of it.  

I am grateful for experiencing Chicago in the 70's and 80's; although glad to be out in the countryside now....

[phukhole]

We are a lot more connected and open today, but cruising "back in the day" was an art.  One that I am sad to see fade away.  The sex was piggy and nasty and dirty and dangerous, for sure, though.  The places to pick up/meet men were likewise seedy and usually in bad areas (no nice place would rent to "those kind" of people).  A big city could be an oasis for gay men, but it wasn't even as open as it is now.  Plenty of bars with buzzers, door men controlling access,  lights that flickered  (or came on) if someone looked like a cop, businesses with no signs or blacked out windows.  Lots of raids and harassment still happened, but still oases, nonetheless.   Cruisy parks, rest stops, bus stops, adult theaters, bookstores - all served as lifelines for those stuck (or choosing  to live) in smaller cities, suburbs or even rural areas.  In the 80's we saw a huge jump in not only visibility, but also technology and connection options - magazines with classifieds, BBS systems, party lines, phone sex.   Unfortunately, we also saw backlash against us and fear within our communities as AIDS robbed us of an entire generation.  Nowadays, we have hook up apps for all your various tastes and you can arrange to have a guy come over any time of the day or night.  In SOME cities we have bathhouses and sex clubs and clothing optional resorts and private play spaces. There is something titillating about those days.  You felt like you were subversive and getting away with something right under their noses.  It can be easy to romanticize those days as being free-er or more sexually charged, but if I had to choose, I'd rather live today (with some of the butch, harry guys from 70's porn)!

[cumfillthishole]

I wish I grew up as a young gay male in the 70's and 80's. I love how male nudity was the norm for group swimming or p.e. showers. I hate how (almost) everyone has a hangup about nudity these days. Nude swimming used to be the natural norm with a group of boys/men. Celebrating the male form and not shaming it.

 

[stillbreedin]

it was heaven in the 1970s; the golden age of promicuity.

[NWUSHorny]

I didn't come of age until the late 80's, but there was a lot of opportunities to hookup from cruising in the Midwest, the primary difference is it was almost all condomed fucking. While cruising has definitely moved to the Internet to some extent there are still places in North America where I have no trouble finding action and others where it is almost completely unavailable even in large cities.

[hungry_hole]

On 9/25/2024 at 2:40 PM, IrishBoi said:

anyone who was around the cruising scene back then, how was it and is it as accurate as you see on tv/film

My first sexual encounters were at the YMCA in NYC. I had a gay friend who told me about the YMCA and all the fun he had there. He was a total bottom and he taught me all about being a bottom, cleaning, and other tricks for bottoms.

I was in heaven because I was in my mid 20's and getting lots of attention, young and masculine. There were two floors for men and guys would walk all night thorugh the hallways. This event made me a cumdump

[ktopper]

versmetropig captures the spirit of the era perfectly. There were no cell phones or hookup apps, not even PCs, so hookups required more game. But it was not hard to score in the 70s. Especially in the cities. Simply walking down a sidewalk in the right neighborhood often lead to a hookup if you were looking. Walk past a guy and let your eyes linger on his crotch and he would often do the same. It was an exciting, free and easy, more innocent time to be alive. I rode Harleys back in those days and the "Tom of Finland" look, sans huge biceps and the gym body (although I did have a well muscled ass), came natural.

The eighties, with the exception of the first couple of years, were hell. It is hard to explain how bad it was. People were dying, everyone was afraid, gays were ostracized.

Having lived through those decades I really do think that the present is a golden age for gays, based on things like huge improvements in health care and general tolerance of gays and lesbians.

[wonderfulwoof]

born n raised in SF.  first time i heard about the castro was a halloween in 1978.  i couldn’t figure where it was as my family called it Eureka Valley.  started hitting fairs n outside spots so i wouldn’t be seen in bars

but walking n u look they look back take u to there place n u leave after all the cum is out of ur cocks.

taking my dog for a walk, never failed to be invited in as they wanted to make sure she had water, n sucked me.

i was so shy

everybody older than me died

sf is still a lot of fun.  i think i have more piggy sex now then ever before.  seems people are more open to it.

nude beaches were my are my krytonite

[infinite290]

I know how easy it is to romanticize the past, even more so if you feel like you were born out of your time, or perhaps, feeling like there was an integral part of human history that you missed out on. And while I truly, truly find myself astonished by those who made it through the 80's and 90's and aren't completely broken by it (I feel my heart would not have been capable of handling the immense loss), I can't help but feel that the sense of brotherhood is different from whatever we call it today. Something exists between two men undercover trying to find sex, but also, seeking out friendship, vs. today where it's just... sex. You might as well have a filter for "eye contact allowed". anyways, rambling. thanks for all the sharing folks. im feeling very...not sure, actually. but, thank you. 

[hntnhole]

16 hours ago, infinite290 said:

those who made it through the 80's and 90's

This was pointed out in some other, similar thread ...

Don't forget that when hiv appeared, almost everybody simply stopped fucking.  I don't mean slacked off - I mean stopped.  Period.  While guys that had paired off at least had their other halves to have sex with (after testing, of course), single guys either bagged it (not all that many resorted to condoms - the normal, backroom-kind of sex just dried up seemingly overnight) it or didn't have sex at all.  Lots of guys didn't dare trust condoms (they can break, obviously).  It was the worst for guys that were single, and had no one to get through the hellscape with.  

"Having sex" went from Nirvana to Hell-vana, and very, very quickly, unless a guy was in a closd, trusting relationship.  One guy from our neighborhood simply laid down and died right in our driveway.  One of the gay newspapers went out of business (they carried all the announcements of "Celebration of Life" services) because no one wanted to pick it up, go through all the pages of horror anymore. That kind of mortality really kills the fun of wanton breeding.  

For most of us that experienced it, those scars have crusted over by now, but we'll never forget, either.  

[PozBearWI]

But we didn't completely stop, we just tended to become "more selective" and different guys used different selection criteria.  I tended to stick with guys I knew and avoided strangers.  Once testing became a thing a lot of us went for "negative" result guys which probably slowed some transmission; but we hadn't really understood things like "window" period until late in that decade a more in the 90's.  Even then; understanding of HIV has evolved and we pretty much figured out how we were going to cope with it.  New infections still happened.  

It would be interesting if CDC actually has statistics about how infection rates changed.  I always have a hard time web searching as I seem to always find myself in an endless, and uninformative loop.