theplayerking
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Everything posted by theplayerking
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Tell your partner it’s your first time so he can be extra gentle and make sure you’re opened up properly. Especially if you’re at a bathhouse, you don’t want someone who’s just going to slam it in.
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PrEP is the only part of my sex life that has changed appreciably. I’ve always been interested is anonymous hookups and group sex. Now I can do it raw.
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Get him on PrEP. If you met him on Scruff, his issue might be more about safety than casual sex per se.
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I’m definitely a metrosexual, which many people outside of New York or LA assume is potentially gay.
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How do you get attention at Bathhouses?
theplayerking replied to valleyvers's topic in General Discussion
I think in Japan you can signal your preferred roll by where you put your key, e.g., left arm or right arm, etc. -
I’ve found in wealthier countries they tend to be expensive and legit (if sensual) massages. In poorer countries, they immediately start trying to upcharge you for “additional” services. In those places, they have no intention of providing a real massage at all and, if that’s what you’re looking for, not worth the money.
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I would play with a friend or coworker that I was attracted to if we happened to bump into each other at a bathhouse or sex party. However, if I recognize someone I know on an app, I would not contact him. More out of fear of rejection than embarrassment.
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I don’t think this is possible unless he is naturally predisposed to feel the same way. Some guys can completely separate sex from emotion while others can’t. A guy that equates sex with emotion will always be insecure that you’ll leave him for someone else.
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How do you get attention at Bathhouses?
theplayerking replied to valleyvers's topic in General Discussion
I find eye contact is enough for a guy to register his interest (or disinterest). Guys that are not interested usually look away quickly and I do the same. I suppose there might be some shy newbies that look away to be coy, but I won’t approach a guy who won’t look at me. -
I’ve rejected guys at the beginning of sex parties that I ended up playing with by the end. Once I’ve surveyed all the available options my standards sometimes shift.
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No. I’m shallow. I get off more on the validation of being desired by a hot guy than the sex itself.
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Even if you’re been fucking raw, getting bred is crossing a big emotional and psychological line. Before I went on PrEF, I would get caught up in the moment and fuck raw but never knowingly got bred. I recommend going on PrEP.
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When I was single I would hope to meet a BF at a bathhouse or sex party under the assumption that a guy I met under such circumstances would be open to non-monogamy and group sex. Unfortunately it didn’t work out. I met my husband on Tinder and he wants exclusivity.
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I have always fetishized going raw but came of age during the AIDS Crisis so was hesitant I have a big dick and have difficulty staying hard in a condom I used to go to a lot of sex parties where nearly everyone was fucking raw (either on PrEP or undetectable) PrEP became available and was almost free with insurance Going bareback opened up the possibilities of hooking up with much hotter guys (especially in group situations in big U.S. cities) It feels amazing It’s a huge psychological rush to let a man cum in my ass All that being said, I probably would have never barebacked regularly were it not for PrEP.
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A lot of guys like breaking in newbies. Be upfront and honest.
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I find that articulating what you want out loud, over time, helps with inhibitions. Try looking at yourself in the bathroom mirror a couple times a day and say out loud: “I want to get fucked up the ass.” (Or some equivalent.) Then try saying the same thing softly while walking down the street. It sounds cheesy, but physically saying what you want (rather than just thinking about it) can help.
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I would make a Plan B as well. People change. Bodies change. No one can be a cumdump twink forever.
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The West Side Club is closed.
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The problem with these scenarios is getting people to show up. And four bottoms is a lot. You’ll need quite a stable of tops to keep them happy.
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Saunas aren’t great in New York. One just closed because of Covid but it had declining attendance for years. Nearly all of the action is online these days. Your best bet is to live alone in Hell’s Kitchen or Chelsea.
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Many men bond by doing activities together. Sex is obviously one, but there are many others. Is meetup.com active in your area?
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I’ve never had a first time sex date. I’ve had lots of first time hookups, where the guy comes over, we strip down and go at it, but never with the pretense of it being a date. I’ve also had preplanned play dates with regular fuck buds, but usually avoid planning a first time hookup because I find they often don’t work out. Something comes up, or the guy just flakes, etc. Hookups are best quick and in the moment, before you each have a chance for second thoughts.
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Hot story. Wish my husband were into groups. I hope you guys get more action.
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I live in New York and while there are a lot of guys, they tend to be super picky. Especially in Manhattan. You might have better luck in the south, like Atlanta or Fort Lauderdale.
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Have you changed in sexual behaviour over the decades?
theplayerking replied to parvenu's topic in General Discussion
Started having lots of casual hookups right after college and continued until my early 40s when I met my boyfriend (and soon to be husband). If we were not together I’d still be cruising Grindr, BBRT, attending sex parties, vacationing at sex resorts, etc. I love one-time hookups with strangers. Nothing particularly raunchy or kinky beyond the variety and quantity. My tastes and interests have not really changed at all.
