ErosWired

That’s a tough one. You wouldn’t think it would be, because I have zero problem saying I don’t have to get a load in me to feel that I’ve served my purpose, and that I count my success in fucks, not loads. But this question forces me to think about what pleasure motivates me to slut myself, which feels unnatural and beside the point for a service bottom. I feel pleasure if it pleases the Top to make me feel pleasure, just as I endure pain if it pleases the Top to give me an intentionally painful fuck. I guess I have to land in the positive middle and say I’m both a cockslut and a cumslut, because what drives me into extreme, degrading promiscuity is the sense that another man is taken to another level when he feels that he has joined his flesh to mine. That can take the form of that shuddering sigh and groan right after he enters, or a joyous mid-fuck cry of “It’s so fucking wet!” to a jackhammering with a command to “Take it. Take it!” To his orgasm impossibly deep inside my body at the end. I know by these things that I serve him well both in pleasure to his cock, and in bringing about and accepting the release of his cum. Someone in another thread recently - I regret I can’t remember who - said he thought cumdumps provided a valuable and needed service. That made me proud. So I’ll proudly fly both the Cockslut and Cumslut flags, and never feel one instant of shame.

This forum is focused on bareback sex, not BDSM-related sex specifically. You may find a few here (like myself) who are experienced in BDSM lifestyle/protocols, are accustomed to being used in restraints, etc., but a lot of men here aren’t. Your best shot here would be to post something in the regional hookup section of the forum for your area. Also, you might consider trying Recon dot com - men there will definitely know what you’re talking about. Being rough-fucked in restraints is one of my favorite ways to serve, but I don’t give very good face. 😉

LOL! - Guilty as charged. I understand what you’re expressing by affectionate grooming. I alluded to it when I mentioned those who respond to positive reinforcement. I suppose ‘affectionate grooming’ could also be applied to less targeted or less change-driven actions. In that sense, ‘affectionate grooming’ makes me think of brushing my cat to maintain her coat. Which in turn puts a very strange image of you in my mind with a Top... kinky... 😉 No, I probably wouldn’t respond as readily to that kind of attention. First, I’m not a very emotion-driven person, and secondly, I’m a shorthair. 😺

@tallslenderguy - You reference my words “trained” and “conditioned” in quotes, which suggests that you think their usage is inaccurate or overblown. In the sense that I am talking about, and certainly in regard to my own experience, both words are apt and specific. I think you are quite right that I have a naturally bottom/sub composition, and that I would probably have been a bottom/sub regardless of the influence of any particular man. I also agree that we are much more likely to develop from an openness to learning than to coercion. A distinction I would like to make, however, is that between simple learning from one another through the sharing of information, and the actual training of one man by another through the use of practices and techniques intended to bring about a direct and substantial change in the subject. I keep coming back to my own case because (I think) it’s a bit farther toward the extreme edge of the topic, but serves as good illustration. My former Master didn’t simply encourage me to explore my natural tendencies through affection or simple suggestion; he - very consciously - employed Pavlovian conditioning methods, guided suggestibility, humiliation, physical restraint, and a complex application of forced pleasure and pain until the boundary between the two became indistinct and therefore something he could manipulate. He approached his work on me with specific goals in mind - to discover whether he could a) control another man’s orgasm on command; b) cause another man to accept the reality that he had a natural duty to be sexually used by other men; and c) instill both of the above as permanent changes to the subject. He accomplished the first two certainly, and there is no sign that he failed in the third. Whatever sort of bottom I might have ended up being, I am absolutely certain that had I not been owned by one particular Man, I would not now believe with all my heart, as I do, that every man should be able to fuck me on demand, and that that is right and natural, and I would not have an involuntary orgasm every time another man tells me - or even texts me - “Cum.” So my initial question relates more to this kind of training, albeit not to my extreme. You say you respond better to positive reinforcement. Some people respond more readily to negative reinforcement, and sometimes a combination is effective. The issue is whether the change that takes place is significant, would have taken place without the direct intervention of the trainer, and is of a lasting nature. One bottom giving another tips on how to swallow a cock may make him a better cocksucker. But training him - giving him the experiential basis for proficiency - is a different matter. Yes, the first bottom could stiffen up and coach the second bottom with his own cock, but is that going to prepare him for the actual experience of accommodating a Top, with the Top’s needs, expectations and aggression? We can absolutely all help each other get better. But in the sense of making lasting change in a man, of shaping his raw clay into a more developed form, or of honing a sexual athlete, I think both my words and my original question still have relevance.

I have, in fact, been helping a young man discover and nurture his Top instincts. I agree that it feels something like a duty, though one that is a joy to fulfill. I do also, frequently, share information and advice (for what 2¢ will get you) with other bottoms, but there’s a massive difference between swapping pointers and conditioning another man for sexual service. I don’t even necessarily mean that as extremely as it sounds, or to the extent done to me, but just actual, proper training that pushes limits and builds skills. It’s not that I don’t think anyone could go through the mechanics of training the bottom, either, but to instill the desired attitude and frame of mind... I don’t know.

The men who come up alongside me to fiddle with my cock have all been seniors who exhibit no intention of fucking. Even blindfolded I can usually identify the type of man who does this by the furtive nature of his touch - these are not men who enjoy taking a solid grip on a bottom’s cock for better thrusting leverage. I don’t think I’m predefining what I want to happen in a sling - I’m just pointing out - as per the title of this topic - what slings, as sexual furnishings, are designed for, and suggesting that some men clearly have a poor understanding of this function. I’m not talking about a personal set of “rules” - I’m talking about the commonly understood protocols around sling play for those who know what they’re doing. I don’t think it’s prohibitively or even unreasonably predefining to expect other players to know how the game is played. If I were in a sling and a man came in and, seeing me naked and highly vulnerable with my feet up in the chains, decided he couldn’t resist indulging his foot-tickling fetish on my non-ticklish soles, would you say my expectations were too narrow if I asked him to leave? Or if a guy found me blindfolded in a sling and thought it would be a great chance to try out his brand-new leather flogger he just got off Amazon because he heard about Shades of Grey and was turned on but had never tried anything ‘kinky’? (Something of this nature happened, and though not specifically in a sling it could easily have been) What about the old guy who positioned himself between my legs, explained that he was a bottom himself, and asked me - repeatedly - to try to push out solid waste (I’m trying to be discreet here; this, I’m sorry to report, did actually happen to me in a sling) because he was into that. I had, as always, fully cleaned out, so had nothing in me, but do you think I’m excessively predefining the experience if I say Hell No to something like that? The thing all these scenarios have in common is that I’m simply lying in a piece of specially designed fucking furniture, in a position particularly ideal for fucking, making myself available for the use of Tops who may wish to enjoy fucking that way, and a man approaches who isn’t planning on fucking me. Yet you’re implying that if I don’t submit to every random pawing, tugging, and savage nipple-biting he wants to apply to me, it will be my own fault if no one actually fucks me because I’ve predefined my expectations too narrowly and scared off all the timid, uncertain and inexperienced Tops. Well - I can live with that. My role is to surrender my body to the service of Men who Top, who know what they want, and are confident enough to reach out and take it. I don’t provide service to other bottoms, and if a Top is too inhibited to fuck a piece of good ass right in front of him in a setting specifically set up for fucking, then he probably needs to level up a bit before he comes back to the sling room.

Just a side note - you may find some men in uniform very reluctant to play while in uniform, for a couple of reasons: 1. If they are observed by a third party (or, God help them, photographed or videoed) doing something like that in uniform, they’re looking at some kind of reprimand at least, termination at worst. Not sure how it’s handled in the military, but it can’t be pleasant. The reason is that while in uniform they represent their agency or branch of service, and cannot behave entirely as though they are private citizens. 2. For some men in uniform, the uniform has meaning, and is a source of pride because it symbolizes their dedication to serving their country and fellow citizens. They may refuse to do anything in it because they feel it would cheapen or tarnish what the uniform represents. When I was in uniform, if guys learned what I did for a living, they would occasionally beg me to come let them do things to me in uniform. I never did, because my uniform represented something to me. I was unwilling to turn into some guy’s cumrag. Of course, there will be lots of Men who don’t see things that way. There are no doubt plenty who see their uniform as a means to obtain and control, and will have no qualms about using it for that. I’m just saying, if you cruise some guy in uniform, don’t be too surprised if you get a hard pass on including the uniform in play - he may have his reasons. 😉

What gets me is the guys who say, “Can I wear a condom?” and if I agree they then ask, “Do you have any?” Or they’ll just come straight out front with “Got condoms?” as though it’s my responsibility to make sure they have everything they need for Sexytime. I used to carry a small variety of condoms with me in case someone asked, but I have since gotten rid of them because I simply refuse to lie about anything. If they don’t want to enjoy my ass bare, there are those who will, and do, and call me up to get it. It’s no great loss to me.

And if they agree to bare entry with the expectation of being fluid-free afterward, they’re idiots anyway. If it’s an STD/HIV concern, leaking happens, and even precum can be a vector (less so than semen in the case of HIV). But all bets are off regardless if the Top has a hair-trigger and cums the instant he enters. A while back I had a guy with a very nice cock stop by, and I was so ready for him I could feel the heat radiating off my cunt. I was pre-fucked and lubed to creamy perfection. I felt the tip of his cock touch my hole and - “God - sorry - I just came.” He dressed quickly and fled. Well, fuck. He could have at least pushed it in. But my point is that if he had had just a little more momentum on the approach he would have been ejaculating inside me while he was first entering me. A bottom never knows what’s cumming (as it were) and therefore it only makes sense to assume bare entry will result in taking at least a partial load. Any other expectation Is nonsense, and in my view, no Top should be under any obligation to comply with nonsense.

*I should add to the above that he is aware that this is a placebo effect. I do not deceive anyone about anything.

Viagra (Sildenafil citrate) does not work like that. A clinical trial of Viagra administered in a crushed form dissolved beneath the tongue found an average onset of effect of approximately 30 minutes on an empty stomach. There is no way to use it for an “instant boner”. In fact, Viagra won’t give you an erection at all unless you’re sexually aroused once it’s active in your system. My suggestion: Find some hard blue pill-like candy, crush it, and convince yourself that if you swallow a little of it you’ll get rock-hard in a minute. I assure you, it works perfectly. A 21-year-old guy who fucks me has a problem getting hard, but after I give him a dose of “Viagra”, he’s cunting me deep within 5 minutes.

It seems grossly unfair to me not to accept a Top unloading inside you - you’ve let him enter you and set into motion a whole array of powerful instinctual and chemical drives that supercharge the pleasure centers of his brain. The whole core of his biological being at that point is working toward a reproductive goal, which will provide him an enormous physical and mental reward, but only if fully completed. Full completion includes - most importantly - the sensation of releasing cum into the target environment. If you’ve ever cum deep inside someone bare, you know what I mean - there simply is no comparison. It would never occur to me to deny that fundamental human right to any Man. And I don’t.

Let me respond to you this way: You’re concerned that 35 is too old? I didn’t take a cock until I was 37. I turned 53 last month, and your 24-load annual goal is what I took in in one really good day last year. And I guarantee you that no matter how small you feel like Jacksonville is, it’s a metropolis compared to the one-goat town I’m in - yet I’m still able to travel around and fulfill my sexual purpose. Plus, unlike you, I have a face made for radio. So for you, getting the cock or ass (or the actual relationship) you want sounds as if it will be more a matter of adjusting your own expectations and standards, once you accept that you’re prime material. 1. Don’t be one of those guys who holds out waiting for Mr. Perfect. You’ll have a lot more fun playing with regular, normal guys, who can be surprising in the sack if given half a chance. 2. Travel around a bit if you can, especially to a bigger city, and just tell yourself that since nobody knows you, it doesn’t matter if you get a bit debauched. Permit yourself. 3. Cast a wider net. If Grindr isn’t working for you, why are you still using it? You can run profiles or ads on BBRTS, Growlr, Adam4Adam, Scruff, Manhunt, Doublelist, and others - the more exposure you have, the greater your chances. 4. Searching for an intimate connection with another man in the current environment is like panning for gold. Everybody’s out there trying to strike the mother lode, but the reality is hours and days of swirling gravel (and flakes) and water around in a pan just for the occasional glint of something in the bottom. Sometimes it’s fool’s gold, and sometimes it doesn’t pan out at all, but - there’s gold in them thar hills. I find my share of it, and you can too.

There’s actually a fetish with the acronym CMNM - “Clothed Male, Naked Male” - that plays on the power/vulnerability dynamic between one or more fully clothed men, often in professional or business attire, ‘power suits’, etc., and a single male who is either naked at the outset or is stripped down by the others, often for purposes of “examination”, which leads to some kind of sexual use. I confess I get something of a rush from imagining myself naked among such dressed men, but at the same time I don’t know if I could keep myself from wondering how he plans to get a cum stain out of that silk tie...

I’m a trained sexual service submissive, shaped by experiences under several dominant Tops including a former Master/Owner. From time to time, I’m approached by other bottoms who ask if I will help train them to do the sort of things I do and react in the ways I react. I never agree to this because I don’t Top ever, at all, but I have wondered sometimes whether it really does require a Dominant Top to properly train a submissive bottom for service, or whether an experienced service bottom could teach a new bottom what he needs to know. My personal trajectory couldn’t have been achieved, I don’t think, by anyone but a Dominant Top with Sadist tendencies, but my case isn’t really mainstream. What do you think? Does it take a Top to train a bottom, or can bottoms train others to serve Tops?

I have never found this kind of mutuality from another cumdump so far. I do get contacted from time to time by guys who say how much they relate to what I write, and how they have feelings in common with mine, and I share pretty openly with them. But sooner or later - usually sooner - they start asking if I could train them how to do the things I do, or let them join me when I host, or refer Tops to them, and it becomes obvious that they’re just interested in using me.

I understand the numerous reasons why a Top might enjoy watching a bottom show distress during a fuck. I have no doubt that I’ve provided plenty of this kind of enjoyment to Tops because once I have committed to a fuck I force myself to see it through to the Top’s satisfaction no matter what. But this guy in Blake’s Ordeal - something seems off. Had the guy never been fucked before in his life? Those men were big, but they weren’t huge. And they were even what I would call “considerate”. That was what I would list as an ‘enjoyable fuck’ (minus the constant fellatio, which would become annoying after a while) - it didn’t take on the brutalistic frenzy of a similar Cutlerx fuck. Yet the bottom seemed to be in agony. He was initially barely taking 4” of penetration and acting as though they’d hit his diaphragm. Even with two pairs of hands pushing his upright pelvis straight down onto the impaling cock (hot) they didn’t make much progress. The bottom must have been A) Extremely inexperienced and therefore unqualified to shoot this scene; B) Suffering from a serious physical issue like an anal fissure or a bowel blockage - an anal tear could have even occurred during the first penetration; or C) Overacting, but if so, he’s a damn good actor. Maybe it’s just my sex-jaded eye that makes me think any of this. In any case, they had no business jacking off onto his hole at the end. That needed to be inside.

Not recommended. First, a humbler is designed to force you to stay bent at the knees, and most designs I’ve seen (or built) don’t give you much latitude for leg spreading. This is going to limit the potential positions available to the Top. Second, the hard, solid restraining bar of that humbler is positioned just about exactly where the Top’s balls would be smacking against you - likely uncomfortable for the Top. Lastly - and most important, so it probably ought to have been first - a humbler traps your testicles behind your legs, and you have to keep your legs bent so as not to pull too hard on your balls. But fucking can be forceful, unpredictable, and even violent, and involve the full weight of an adult male pressing down on you with force. Now imagine a Top losing himself in the moment and straightening you out underneath his 250 lbs of muscle and bone. Instant testicular trauma requiring hospitalization, and maybe worse. A humbler is a specialized piece of BDSM equipment for advanced submissive training and scening, not for casual, rough-and-tumble play. Get the sling. You’ll have more fun. Plus, if you can’t get action when you want it, at least you can take a nap in the sling...

For anyone else following this topic, I would add a word about digital photo editing. I’ve worked with Photoshop on a professional basis for decades, and if I wanted to, I could make a pic of myself look like anything, and you would not be able to tell the difference. But I don’t, and I never will. Photography, at its best, reveals truths, and judicious edits made with purpose can reveal profound truths. But photos can also be made to tell pernicious lies that rip at the fabric of our relationships with one another. So if you’re ever tempted to make a pic lie on your behalf, remember two things: 1: We’d probably rather know the real you; and 2: unless you’re a pro, that ‘shop job on your abs is going to look ridiculous.

^! ^! ^! I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve had a promising breeding lined up only to have him message me just as I’ve checked out of the hotel, saying, “Fuck! I fell asleep! Are you still there?” I mean, come on. Who thinks to himself, I’ve got some guaranteed ass - I can go fuck... nah, I’d rather stay here and fap until I doze off. Is this what men have come to? Can they even be called men? I ask you...

For those of us who wish to avoid stumbling into offensive territory, yet have only a very short window in which to edit a post, is there any way we might be informed which terms are forbidden? I realize the inherent problem with this question, in that the act of listing the forbidden words would make yet another use of them on the site, so if there were some other means of conveying the information it would assist our efforts to comply.

When you say “in tandem with the youth market”, do you mean as a niche area where the occasional Daddy figure is brought in to interact with the youth on screen, or do you mean “in parallel with” as in a market that depicts older as a demographic? (I feel I should say, @FelchingPisser, that you’re an extraordinary sexual prodigy by any measure, and the fact that you were asked to do porn at 54 may not shed much light on the general question, it being an obvious no-brainer on the part of that - or any - studio. It’s hard to imagine any ceiling that could contain you, and having been filled *very* full of you, I believe I can say that with confidence.)

I did a search on this, but got no result, so forgive me if this has already been answered somewhere. How old is the oldest bareback porn actor currently (or recently) working? I'm curious to know if there's a glass age ceiling in the industry, or if in this world where there's nothing that doesn't turn somebody on, the camera is age-blind. I suspect the camera is almost entirely a youth-worshipping little bitch, but I could be wrong.

I admit it - the camera does not love me. I have a face made for radio, so that's a lost cause, but try as I might, I've found it almost impossible to get decent images of my body that escape my personal cringe threshold. I've stumbled into luck a couple of times when some random Top has snapped a shot of my ass that turned out to be functional, but not everyone is a photographer, and I don't make a habit of annoying Tops with narcissistic-sounding requests to photograph me. (Half the time, it doesn't even occur to me - I am, after all, focused on their pleasure at the time.) Taking shots of myself always ends up being harder than I think it will be. There's just no way to make it look natural without some elaborate setup, some places are unreachable without mirrors, and it's hard to put the camera lens in the place of a Top's hungry eye when the camera is attached to your hand. Plus, some of the juicy positions require balance. For those of you with good shots, or satisfied with the ones you have, how do you go about getting good photographs? Any tips or tricks? Do you have a special photographer friend who does it for you? Do you pay to have it done? Are they stills from your porn work? I refuse to post images of myself that aren't real, and aren't fresh, so I would appreciate any advice. (And no, I'm afraid I don't have any porn work from which to pull stills. *sigh*)

Not something I carry, but I remember a Top at camp a couple of years ago carried with him a small wedge made of some kind of stiff blue foam. We arranged to hook up and he brought it with him into my cabin. As he got ready to breed me, he raised my ass and set the wedge underneath my ass to keep it angled in just the right position for his fuck. I don't know whether the exact angle was a matter of trial-and-error for him, but he slid down and deep with every delicious thrust. No idea where he got it, but it couldn't have been that expensive.