ErosWired

Is that how they say "Pics or it didn't happen" in the Netherlands? Challenge accepted.

The first thing to do is sit yourself down and have a long, honest, internal talk about what it is you’re looking for in your life. Nobody gets to have it all - to get something, you may have to compromise on something else. The question then becomes, is that thing worth the compromise to you? It’s not at all surprising that you would have difficulty finding a committed partner while you live a cumdump life; you are not exposing yourself to a community of men who place a high value on that kind of relationship. As a cumdump myself, I sometimes think about the type of men who would go to a budget hotel room and fuck a man they’ve never met, know nothing about, and will probably never see again. They are a distinct subset of the male population - a minority - of Men predisposed to view us as convenient at best, at worst, objects on which to vent their rage. They do not come to us looking for a life companion. Quite the opposite - we attract them because they can immediately walk away as soon as their sexual appetite is sated. The other side of the coin is the type of man who wants a life companion. He doesn’t look for him among the cumdumps, for a number of reasons, perhaps chief among them being that he is looking for someone who will commit to a one-to-one relationship that values him above all others. This may not mean monogamy (he may want to play too) but a cumdump is the living definition of “uncommitted”. He isn’t going to want to share you that freely because to him it will illustrate that you don’t value the relationship. It’s possible you could find someone willing to be your boyfriend who is a dominant Top who whores you out and shares you with his friends, neighbors, and the homeless under the bridge. But even he isn’t going to want to let you cumdump around on your own, because in his mind, you will be his. As in his to control. And that probably isn’t going to be a healthy relationship in the long run. It seems most likely that in order to achieve and maintain a stable, long-term relationship, you may have to compromise on your ability to do anon cumdumping, unless and until you have built up enough trust with your partner that he is okay with it at some level. All this said, I’m sure there are guys on here who are making it work somehow and will have different, and probably better, advice. I’m pretty much talking out my ass anyway (and why not, I do a lot of other things with my ass) because I know I’m not relationship material and am not going to ever end up with a boyfriend. In any case, best of luck with your aspirations.

Like I said at the start of this thread, I don’t think of myself as a pig in any sense, even though what I do may fit some men’s definition of one. Understanding that that might be the case, I probably won’t react if a Top fucking me were to call me a pig. However! I recently noticed in another thread that one of our worthy members described himself (with pride) as a “breeding sow”. I’m glad that works for him. That would be a Nope for me. If a Top fucking me said, “Take it! Take it, you sow!” I would buck him off and we’d have a sudden conversation about gender, because I don’t pretend to be a female - human or swine. ...Okay, maybe I wouldn’t actually buck him off - my training would probably override my sensibilities and I’d let him finish - but I wouldn’t like it at all...

My dear fellow, whatever gave you that notion? It’s to your credit that you believe the homosexual Homo sapien capable of responsibly containing his sexual urges on a regular basis. But... no.

Take a look at this thread. It says everything a long-haul bottom needs to know about internal preparation:

You are correct in that Sadism, pleasure in the infliction of pain, is considered a separate mental construct from schadenfreude. I still believe, however, that in the context we are discussing, schadenfreude may also play some role as we think of the submissive’s meeting of the particular Dom as happenstance. Your last reply is a remarkable piece of self-analysis, and a rare window into the mind of Dominant Tops of your uncommon breed. I am grateful for your insight.

Lol - You do realize that you were once the creature bursting out in one of these horror scenarios?

Two observations: 1. Undetectable does not mean that not one single copy of the virus can be found. It means that the count is below the threshold for a significant positive test result. Just because the tests come back Undetectable doesn’t mean they found absolutely nothing. Undetectable <> Negative. 2. There is such a thing as a false positive test result. My nephew had one. A subsequent test came back negative. There are also false negatives - a series of false negatives (and extraordinarily bad luck) is why I ended up with AIDS before I even knew I was infected. The best way to confirm a dubious test result is to test again, with the aid of a professional.

@backdoorjimmy - If you spend your time trying to be someone who appeals to every man, you will fail, and at the end of the day you won’t even recognize yourself. It’s impossible to please every taste. If you are one of those guys who is a social chameleon, you might be able to adapt somewhat to a wider range of male expectations, but such persons run the risk of seeming shallow. (I realize that may not matter for a hookup fuck, but personally, I want a Top to know he can dive deep into me. ) It’s better to be confidently yourself, because self-confidence is always sexy. If odors do it for you, then they’ll attract kindred spirits - just maybe don’t go crazy with that. All things in moderation. In terms of how you present in text ads and profiles, possibly be less specific, and don’t use words that conjure uncleanliness, like “dirty” and “pee”. Try using language like “Love strong man smells - odors a huge turn-on.” If I read that I would not only assume that the person in the profile would expect me to have such odors, but that he would have them too.

How interesting that you are fascinated with the hyper-masculinity of bodybuilders, but your sexual scenarios picture them in the bottom role. Usually when guys fixate on muscle and muscle worship, it’s in the context of “muscle Tops” (not always, but predominantly). Does your obsession exclusively feature built bottoms? (P.S. Steroid use has horrible health effects. It’s never a good idea. Best to keep it in the realm of fantasy.)

Guys, just a reminder - rawTOP’s update to the site rules (no. 4) in “Read This Before You Post” prohibits discussion of sc*t. His explanation says incidental references are okay, but some of this is more than incidental and may be close to crossing a line...

When you wrote “ironic” did you mean to say “idiotic”?

@FaceLoad - Thank you very much for taking the time to give such a complete and honest answer to my question, which was indeed sincere. I find myself fascinated by the many different forms that the Top mind takes, and I have no instinctive understanding of any of them, so I ask. My former Master was a Sadist, so your philosophy is not unfamiliar to me in principle. The difference in my case is that he very seldom fucked me (alas) but concentrated his will on shaping my mind and physical response using other means. He nonetheless assumed full, practical, physical ownership of me, to the extent that he possessed a paper deed to my body. (I still issue this deed on a limited basis to *very* select Men under special circumstances.) I do not presume to judge either your motives or your practices. You are, of course, correct regarding the nature of injury to the anus and rectum as a result of sexual intercourse it was not designed for - my only observation being that for most of us the imperative is to mitigate rather than to exacerbate that injury. Still, you honestly explain your reasons, and I respect them as considered decisions even if I cannot advocate them. The pleasure you take in the suffering of the submissive - your schadenfreude - may seem distasteful to some, but is the necessary accompaniment to the need for certain submissive personalities to submit and even suffer. We don’t experience catharsis without at least a semblance of cruelty. The degree to which cruelty crosses a line is less a matter of debate and more a matter of individual negotiation, unless the Top is a true psychopath. On the one hand, I think it would be a fascinating experience to be bred by you. On the other, I very much hope that’s an encounter I never have.

Well! Tonight I finally got the fucking machine I’ve been building onto a stable enough adjustable base that I could actually take it for a test ride. WOOF. It’s got two speeds. I tried them both. The higher speed was like a very aggressive rough fucking Top. I let it plow me for a long time while I felt my insides loosen just like they would during a seriously intense reaming. After a while it started to get to be a little too much, and then it occurred to me - oh yeah, this thing isn’t going to stop on its own... So I let it go a while longer, to simulate the feeling of surrendering to a Top completely. This machine is going to be excellent training for taking cock. I just need to get some thicker and longer dildos...

The problem with this kind of play in really young guys is that they think they’re fucking immortal and indestructible and don’t have good sense when it comes to listening to what their bodies are telling them or knowing when to dial it back. Plus, they feel extra pressure to prove that they can handle anything an older man can handle, or anything that’s asked of them by an older man, so when some seasoned fisting Top says he wants to bury his arm in that boy ass up to his elbow, they dare not back down. Because they want to be seen as men. Isn’t that ridiculous? I’ve had an anal fissure - the pain takes your breath away - and I haven’t even taken a full fist yet (working on it). Some of these kids are cruising for years of colorectal issues if they aren’t very careful.

Independence Day (July 4) is coming up in the United States, on a Thursday. I usually do my hotel slutting on Thursdays - more guys seem to want to breed me on Thursdays, I don’t know why - but I’m uncertain whether it’s worth going out on the night of a big holiday long-weekend. Are men going to be too busy with family/friends/parties to think about finding some ass, or will the festivities bring them out into the open and make it more likely? This holiday in particular is going to play hell with early evening fucking because fireworks - but then, fireworks may keep some of them out after bedtime... As a rule, regardless of the specific holiday, would you say you’re more likely, or less likely, to look for bareback play on a holiday?

I’m not a huge fan of riding on top either, but in certain cases, when the Top has a huge cock, I have found it useful as an opening move because it lets my cunt line up naturally all the way down the length of his shaft. Then, when he flips me over to get aggressive, he can fuck really deep with zero resistance. It ends up being a plus for the Top.

Exactly this. There’s even science backing it up. In general, going about my day-to-day life, I don’t “check out” men or women” it doesn’t occur to me to think of random contacts as potential sexual contacts, and even if I did, it would make no sense that any of them would be attracted to me. So it’s only in the specific context of when I set aside time to be sexual that I pay any attention to what I find attractive, and since I do my sex play with men, I generally find men attractive. BUT I would not have a relationship with a man. I was married for 17 years to a beautiful woman, and I still love her very much. From time to time I see other women whose beauty takes my breath away - but I never think of them in sexual terms. They are to be cherished, protected, enabled, admired, loved, and, when and only when they wish it in the context of a relationship, made love to. I remember a quote that went: “A boy fucks girls; a man makes love to women.” Therefore, because I have had sex with women and theoretically could again, and because I also currently have sex with men... lots of men... I consider myself Bi. Because labels. But really, for an autistic like me the whole sexuality thing is a gargantuan nuisance, and I wish it would all just go away, and then my label could read: ___________.

Do you find the Dallas “flesh market” to be particularly bottom-heavy or bottom-competitive? (I would normally rely on member Bbboyfromtn to give us the skinny on the Dallas area, but he seems to have disappeared 😞). If so, you may well be onto something. All-in-all, it makes sense that the bottoms who go to the lengths to make it easiest for Tops to access them are likely to get tapped first.

Do you do this to every bottom you meet? What if the bottom is already a trained, fully compliant sub who already accepts your power over him and the demonstration isn’t necessary? What if he has no issue in yielding to your will? Just curious about this. Also, it’s unclear from your post where you’re expecting the bottom to bleed from, but it sounds like you’re going for an injury in the wall of the rectum/sigmoid colon. If so, that is a dangerous practice. Although rare, is not unheard of for a cock to cause a perforation of the bowel, resulting in a need for surgical intervention. You may have the right to fuck dominantly, but you can’t claim the right to hurt anybody that badly, regardless of consent. Of course, you may have meant that the blood would come from penetrating the anus - but even that could result in an anal fissure, which could sideline the bottom for weeks or months, cause excruciating pain (been there) and may ultimately lead to surgery also (been there, too). Why would you want to injure a bottom in such a way that he would then be unavailable for your use and enjoyment? I ask this not just of you personally, but to all Tops who aim to injure, because it’s never made any sense to me.

Between the two charts, I would say I land most fully in the ‘Fag’ slot, though bitch and sub could either be reasonable fits as well - I think the attractiveness of humiliation tips the scale. I was, however, physically owned for a time as property, as in with a deed to my body, and very much experienced the sense of objectification that went along with that. I wouldn’t mind trying it again...

I concur - finding the right position and angle has been a fruitless search so far fo me as well. I always feel as though I’m having to do gymnastics to accommodate the dildo, mainly because the surfaces around me are mainly either horizontal or vertical. Like you, I want a solution where I don’t have to exhaust myself just trying to maintain orientation. I built my own fucking machine, which I’m sure will work great - if I can get it in the right position and stay there. Until I solve this, at least my dildo serves a purpose - I take it with me when I slut myself out and set it on the table with the lube, and about a third of the guys who come in rape me with it pretty savagely, just for fun.

I’m not sure this vernacular experience really points to straight men particularly trending bottom - it may only seem to suggest that because unlike their gay counterparts, straight men have been less focused on their anuses as sources of sexual pleasure. What we may be witnessing, rather than a “bottoming” of all the straights, is their period of exploration and discovery of something new to them, which we’ve known all along. Given a certain reluctance among women to assist with that area of exploration on the men’s part, it is unsurprising that they turn to gay and bi guys for help - we’re doing it all the time after all. But if women were not so hesitant (or indeed, possessed cocks) there’s no particular reason to think that honestly straight men would ever bother getting off their bus and onto ours where they have to be shoehorned into our artificial Hierarchy of Mansex, and we wouldn’t think of them in terms of bottoms or Tops at all.

I’ve served a number of Doms on and off, and while there are men who relish the feeling of power and control they get when conducting such scenes with a submissive, I think they are actually a rare breed indeed. It requires a mind with an appreciation of schadenfreude, a taking of delight in the misfortune or suffering of others, and it is not a common trait at the level needed to make the kind of Dominant you’re talking about. I was lucky(?) - my Master was a sadist. I will never find anyone else quite like him, but I live in hope that someday I will encounter a Man similarly willing to take possession of my sexuality and drive it as far down the hole of debauchery as his insatiable appetite for control desires.

You don’t say what position you’re being fucked in, but you might try changing positions to see if it feels different and removes the negative problems you’re experiencing. If you’ve been fucking missionary, and depending on the shape of his cock, he may be absolutely pummeling your prostate, which may give you that feeling that you need to pee, and would certainly cause you to leak a lot of precum. If his cock has an upward curve to it, this is particularly likely. Try taking it doggy, or on your side, next time. (I realize this topic was started two years ago and the OP has probably already resolved his issue, but I was surprised that no one had suggested changing position!)