ErosWired

We’re social pariahs because we’re quirky? Congratulations, I couldn’t have come up with a more succinctly damning statement about neurotypical attitudes if I tried. And what the hell do you mean by our “dubious diagnosis”? Again, Autism is not a mental illness. Do not discuss it in those terms. And let me give you a little history lesson - one of the first group of people to be targeted by the Nazis for elimination wasn’t the Jews - it was people deemed mentally defective. Autistic people were slain for being different long before there was a word for Autism, so do not utter the word eugenics in reference to us. But hey, you know, I don’t know why I’m even going to such lengths to set the record straight, when this whole thread really isn’t so much about Autistic vulnerability as it is about everyone’s acknowledgment that there are so many men who lie and victimize that you imagine we must be at risk - and the vast majority of those men are neurotypical.

Jesus Christ. The largest study on Autism and sexuality to date, published in autumn 2021, reports the following: ”Autistic and non-autistic groups did not differ in their risk of contracting a sexually transmitted infection (STI).” You’re pulling this shit straight out of your asses. Stop it.

I’m trying to be patient. Your choice of analogy speaks volumes. To the NT world, an Autistic person is defective, deficient in some way, blind to what is obvious, and therefore to be viewed as someone with a handicap. No, I don’t pick up your limbic cues (thank God - I would rather bash my thumb with a hammer every five minutes than be subject to the emotional chaos that rules the majority of people’s lives). That doesn’t mean I don’t perceive at all, or in an alternate way. As an example: Charisma. There are certain people who are able to charm other people by simple force of personality, the way they smile, their tone of voice, their natural beauty, their skill at manipulation. They’re the kind of people who make successful politicians, megachurch pastors and similar pied pipers because everyone just loves them. It doesn’t work on me. I see them coming a mile off, and I see their false glamour for exactly what it is. I see the trick and I see how they pull it off. Meanwhile, the NTs around me are lapping it up with a spoon. In that situation, I’m not the one with the blind man’s cane. Autistic people are usually the ones standing off to themselves not engaging in small talk (which we generally loathe). It’s not that we’re dull, dumb or numb - it’s just that we’re skin-crawlingly bored. We’re not paying attention to you because you’re mostly talking about what usually preoccupies NTs - feelings. Instead, we’re busy noticing all the details about the room, deconstructing the architecture, identifying the species in the potted plants, etc. If by some miracle we find someone willing to converse about something of consequence, you’ll find we’re more than happy to be sociable, and will discuss it at length - too much length for what NTs seem to consider appropriate for social gatherings, evidently, as there are lots of references to Autistics being unable to shut up. Note that this is only a problem because the NTs want us to shut up. In fact, in most cases, the things that NTs identify as a disability, a delay, or inappropriate or ‘abnormal’ behavior in Autistics, or things that cause Autistics distress, are simply behaviors that don’t conform to what the NTs consider ‘normal’, and therefore react to negatively. It is their reaction that is usually the cause of the problem, not the Autistic behavior. One of the world’s leading authorities on Autism noted that an Autistic person isn’t Autistic when he’s alone. It’s having to deal with the other people. It’s so true. Any time I venture out among NTs is like walking through a minefield, because you don’t realize how incredibly volatile you are. A wrong word chosen, or said the wrong way, in the wrong tone of voice or no tone at all, even just not looking in the right direction, and—BOOM! Autistics have to constantly think about how to navigate around NTs, but NTs don’t do the same for us - they just put a label on us that reads “Not Normal” and either shun us, try to fix us (we’re not broken, thanks) or tell us how it’s all our fault because we don’t know how to behave like normal people (them). Your further comparison of Autism to diabetes and impaired cardiopulmonary function is also wide off the mark - Autism is not an illness. Let me repeat, for emphasis: Autism is not a mental illness. We are not unwell. Autism is not something we have; Autistic is what we are. My mind is as sound as yours, just wired differently. I have two bachelor’s degrees cum laude, a master’s degree magna cum laude, completed all but thesis on a second master’s, completed a year of post-graduate study, have published 13 books, served 30 years as a federal public servant in civilian uniform performing a professional function and 15 years as director of a nonprofit organization. I have dealt with elected officials at the federal, state and local level (I despise all politicians equally). I advanced to a green belt in Tae Kwon Do, studied fencing for three years, and have a concealed carry permit (I am neither helpless nor naïve). I have traveled in 30 states and 9 countries. I have been married and have raised two children into promising citizens-my daughter is going with me to early voting this afternoon, where I will cast my ballot for candidates and ballot measures on which I have made myself well-informed. I live alone, look after myself, provide for others, and pay my taxes. All of which is to say: This Autistic guy is a perfectly functional and accomplished member of adult society, not some mental case who shouldn’t be fucking because he’s too gullible to take care of his own cunt.

“Until PrEP came out”. You’re framing your argument in a realty that no longer exists, and extrapolating conclusions on conditions no longer extant. You might as well be talking about how guys would react in the dark times of the mid-80s, or the years pre-HIV - both would be equally irrelevant in describing contemporary lifestyles. PrEP is available now, in increasing use, and the fact that both ART and PrEP have ensured that HIV is no longer a death sentence has caused a sea-change in the way men approach sexual encounters. That’s irrefutable. Of course this site doesn’t paint a balanced picture of sexual behavior for all gay men - even if the accounts here weren’t heavily riddled with embellishment to start with, the site itself is aimed at a population predisposed to accept risk in pursuit of sex. But it’s this population that’s asking the question, and it’s this population I’m addressing. But, respectfully, your defense against my characterization of ‘NT guy’ - which was clearly a caricature intended to provide a starting point for analysis and not a socioanthropolological profile - amounts to a kind of whataboutism given that my point was a refutation of mischaracterizations of persons with Autism. Mischaracterizations which, I’m sorry to say, are rife, pervasive, and complicate our lives each and every day. I appreciate your effort to be sensitive. You don’t quite succeed, but that’s not entirely your fault. I don’t expect to ever understand the Neurotypical mind because to do so I would have to have one. It would be arrogant and presumptive to think otherwise. Through my caricature of ‘NT guy’ and the analysis that followed, you can see an illustration of how an Autistic person might attempt to interpret how a Neurotypical person would reason. Of course I rely on assumptions. I can’t know. If enough NTs tell me my assumptions are incorrect, I will have to refactor. I know that I can tell you that the assumptions I’m reading here about Autistics are quite wrong. And I’m done beating my head against yet another brick wall.

Keep going forward and never stop playing even if you’re poz, as there is no rewind to that. Don’t pull out (eject) before you ejaculate and make sure to record everything so we can all share your feeling of pleasure. (My first solo porn videos were made with a VHS camcorder 😃)

That’s very interesting, and thanks for the reply. What makes that particularly interesting to me is that now that I know that he was likely doing it with intent to make me feel more vulnerable and submissive, if someone does it again, it will probably have double the desired impact. I also wonder what the effect would have been if he’d been verbally explicit about it at the time, telling me that he could do anything he wanted and there was nothing I could do to stop him. Because he had me in a position where that was essentially true.

(This is a question attempting to understand Top behavior, drive and intention. A bottom perspective is not relevant to the topic.) I was fucked recently in a way that stood out because the Top did something that I have only rarely experienced. He had me on my belly, lying full-length on my back in a very Dominant position mounted on me for deep penetration, his arms had looped underneath mine, to allow him to reach fully forward to my face. Then, he used his fingers to open my mouth and inserted them, using the sides of my open mouth as his grips to anchor him for thrusting leverage. As he did so, his fingers explored the interior of my mouth, fondled my tongue and all the moist surfaces inside. I didn’t mean for me to suck on his fingers - his hands kept my mouth open as a hard gag might have done, and there was nothing I could do to keep his fingers from wandering at will inside my mouth. It was a particularly invasive and vulnerable sensation; not unpleasant, but i only recall a couple of other times when a Top has put his fingers in my mouth in that probing, controlling way, and none had ever used both hands before. If you’re a Top who does this, why? What does it do for you? What pleasure to you take from it? What is it about the inside of his mouth attracts your attention? What effect are you trying to have on the bottom? Any insight from a Top perspective would be appreciated. It does not happen to me often enough for me to study it closely.

Not only do most of us tend to take things literally, and find body language and facial and other emotional cues inscrutable, we also tend to be more trusting and therefore vulnerable to deception. For the same reasons, people with Autism are far les likely to lie about things. And because we don’t, why, we suppose, would someone else? You’re not mistaken about that, and it’s all definitely true of me. God knows I’m far too trusting. But that doesn’t equate to being any more vulnerable to getting infected with an STD by a person who knowingly lies about his status than a Neurotypical. In the situation, the NT guy asks about status. The other guy says, “I’m neg, don’t worry.” NT guy looks at the guy’s face, thinks, He’s full of shit. What happens then? NT guy’s got no evidence the guy lied, just his suspicion. So he has to decide: Bail, insist on a condom, keep asking trying to trip the guy up into telling the truth, or take a chance. But here’s the thing - NT guy is really down to fuck. Bail, really not an option. Play detective, it’s probably just going to piss the guy off and he’s still just going to have to decide condom or bare. Other dude says he only fucks bare. So after all that, NT arrives at the only question he was ever really going to have to answer in the first place: Fuck bare or not fuck? All he’s got between him and a hot load is a doubtful hunch. The vast majority will take the bare fuck. This isn’t hypothetical. It’s all over this forum. Post after post after post relates that almost nobody is using condoms, or even asking for them, and it’s universally accepted that men lie about their status - both ways, in fact. Some will say they’re neg when they’re poz, and some will claim to be poz when they’re neg. And from a practical standpoint it might not matter at any given moment because what a guy says about his status is only ever accurate between his last test and the next unprotected fuck. The NT spider-sense you seem to think exists might be useless because the dude who claims to be neg may believe he’s being absolutely honest because he has no idea he’s infected. Autistic guys - just because we don’t read all the winks and smirks doesn’t mean we’re simpletons. We know we don’t get it. (Your behavior is bizarre to us, and we spend a considerable amount of our time trying to figure out why the fuck you do irrational, emotional shit.) We may not be able to intuit when you lie, but we know perfectly well you do it. So instead of trying to ‘read’ you, we can take the knowledge that guys tend to lie about status and will have probably assessed the calculated risk of such an encounter based on an assumption that the guy is lying before we even see the guy. That’s me. I don’t ask. I don’t need to. Because my health is a matter that concerns me, I think it through, weigh my risk, assume a certain likelihood of exposure, and decide if I’ve mitigated the risk enough to take the cock. Essentially, Neurotypicals and Autistics actually do the same mental calculus in the situation, but use different methods. The NT mind uses a more organic/emotional approach, while the Autistic mind is wired for a more cognitive/systemizing approach. But the result is much the same, because we all face the same risk for the same reason: None of us can read minds, and we all want the fuck. When I say I was “reasonably careful”, I mean that I did all of the above plus regular testing. I’m fairly confident I was infected during the gangbang day I took 34 loads - a situation of excess which I could not have anticipated or factored for, and clearly was not within my anticipated margin of risk.

If you go looking for punishment it means you want it. If you want it, it isn’t punishment. I don’t go looking for punishment - I straight up ask. 😃

I think “will get you banned permanently” is probably sufficiently intriguing to interest people in checking it out, especially if they don’t know what it is.

If you post a ‘Before’ photo, you know we’re going to be looking for an ‘After’.

Three from my recent three-hour-long fucking in Atlanta. I’m very proud of the first one - I’ve finally got the ‘slit’ look I’ve been hoping for. I just added the full series of these in my gallery, if you like them.

I don’t know how I’ve failed to see this thread up til now, but I’m going to tell you up front, as a genuine, card-carrying Autistic person with all the bells and whistles, that all this is Grade-A bullshit. No, gentlemen, being Autistic does not predispose people to contract HIV. Autism does not make us any more likely to be impulsive or careless than Neurotypicals - in fact, generally we’re more likely to hone in on details and more cautious how we interact with people generally, because “normal” people tend to turn really shitty if we don’t get it just exactly right. If we seem to be impulsive, it’s only because we’re not behaving the way Neurotypicals are expecting us to behave. It’s their perception that creates an illusion of impulsivity. Suggestions like this only suggest to Autistic people that Neurotypicals don’t really understand us at all. Yes, many Autistic people have touch sensitivity, but as a result, they’re far more likely to avoid intimate physical contact altogether, than to avoid condoms, and depending on the specific sensitivity, may be more likely to use a condom than go bare if the condom provides a sensory buffer to the more intense sensory input of skin-on-skin intercourse. The impression I get if all this is that some (very clearly Neurotypical) people have looked at a list of potential diagnostic criteria for Autism and thought, I bet somebody like that wouldn’t be careful about sex. Which is classic Neurotypical judging-by-wild-ass-assumption. The history of the identification, classification, and development of strategy toward Autism since time just prior to the second World War has been an absolute horror show of incompetence, arrogance, politics, greed, and scientific ignorance by Neurotypicals - and it’s still going on. I didn’t see any science in the link provided, just generalized statements about diagnosis (an issue very much subject to debate) and an acknowledgment that you can’t really make broad statements about Autistic people because Autism is so variable. Well no shit, Sherlock - you can’t pin it down because there’s no firm consensus on what even causes it yet, other than that there’s almost certainly no single cause. So any speculation about causality like that being discussed in this thread can’t possibly be anything more than something pulled out of somebody’s ass. And I’m sorry, guys, but you fellas chiming in because you “might be” Autistic, or you’re “borderline” Autistic, or you think you fit the profile - no. Come back when you’ve been diagnosed on the Spectrum, and we’ll talk. A person isn’t kinda-sorta Autistic, or a tiny bit Autistic. He may be so well-adapted that he can pass for Neurotypical, but you’re either wired that way or you’re not. Now, I’m Autistic. I was diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome as an adult in 2004, because science hadn’t even come to an agreement about what it was until the mid-80s, and spent the next 20 years trying to figure out how to diagnose it because they still thought it only affected children. I’m also HIV+, and got so sick with it that I nearly died of AIDS. Oh, look - see? An Autistic guy who got AIDS! They must be prone to it. NO. I got HIV for the same reason any Neurotypical gets it - some poz guy fucked me bare. I wasn’t specially vulnerable; I wasn’t squirrelly or not paying attention; I wasn’t too sensitive to use a condom; I was reasonably careful, I got tested regularly, I was educated about the risk, and I went in with my eyes open, not on impulse. I got unlucky. Being Autistic had zero-zip-nada to do with it.

Generally I agree with this. There are, however, a few scenes I’ve seen in which a Top is actively requiring the bottom to look directly into the camera while he’s being bred for purposes of humiliation, submission, or just generally making him show his facial expressions during breeding. I actually find that compelling because you can read so much in the face of a man who’s got a cock in his cunt.

I would like to add a cautionary note to this thread for the benefit of site members who may be looking for medical information in relation to concerns about their own personal condition. Although a member may be qualified or credentialed in a given medical discipline, that person cannot, and ethically should not, attempt to counsel you in an individual way that implies a diagnosis or recommended treatment. That person has not examined you, is not privy to your medical record or case history, and thus any expertise he may have is only applicable in general terms. It would be irresponsible for someone claiming to have a medical credential to, for example, read what you describe as symptoms and reply, “You’ve got gonorrhea.” There is no way he could know that for certain, yet your knowledge of his qualification might influence the way you approach your healthcare in the situation. To those who would answer this topic with their qualifications, I would caution you to be wary not to encourage personal correspondence with other members for purposes of individual consultation - you don’t want to hang out a shingle here and find yourself being hit up for free medical advice. Word gets around. I moderate a mental health support site, and on that site we actually prohibit members from mentioning their professional qualifications in the field for both of these reasons.

The origins of anti-vaccine culture are complicated and link to multiple sources related to different individuals attempting to draw perceived associations between various vaccines and certain harms. While vaccines do pose very limited risk to some individuals, the aggregate benefit vastly outweighs the risk, and in most cases the claimed causal link between a vaccine and a health condition has been proven false. But frightened humans are prone to react irrationally. When in trouble or in doubt, run in circles, scream and shout. Although getting preventative treatment would seem to make logical sense, people base their logic on what they assume to be true. If they assume that vaccines are dangerous, it is logical for them to reject the treatments. And even if people aren’t anti-vax, most people are, at some level, anti-needles. Pretty much nobody likes getting a shot. So from that perspective, avoidance is understandable.

There’s a thread on this very board for members to post links to Twitter porn, so not a non-issue for this site. Just because the porn on Twitter doesn’t excite you personally doesn’t mean the issue is irrelevant. But that’s not really the point anyway. Musk is poised to have a sweeping impact across the internet landscape.

If they can start a new Grindr account to appear to be a different person… so can you. You can even do it with your present account. Change your display name (you can do that at any time), rewrite your profile text, and change out your pics to ones that aren’t identifiable with the current ones. In other words, go under cover. If they can’t find you, they can’t harass you. And I don’t know about the other guy, but if Quark keeps coming back, you could always try buying him off with a few bars of latinum.

I don’t think these sorts of questions have reasoned, rational answers… (The actual answers to the questions above are ‘Yes’, ‘Yes’, ‘Fuck yes’, and ‘I’m a cockwhore’.)

This is self-contradictory. These places may bill themselves as “private clubs” open exclusively to their “members”, but every one I’ve ever been to is more than happy to let any man off the street with the minimum fee become a bona fide “member” for a single day, just to get him in the door. There is nothing exclusive about it - it is an entry fee, plain and simple. The concept of “membership” is meaningless in this context. But I don’t think the question of what “public” means is actually in dispute here. Within the confines of the bathhouse/sauna, a public area is clearly any area where any group of the individuals currently in attendance may openly congregate. A private area is one in which a given individual or individuals may restrict access to a part of the premises for their own purposes.

Just so. And those existential threats to such a repressive government in the United States would likely arise due to the very Second Amendment the potential repressors seem to keen to endorse. There is a statement attributed to Isoroku Yamamoto, commander-in-chief of the Japanese navy in the second world war, cautioning against an invasion of the mainland U.S. because there would be “a rifle behind every blade of grass.” This account may be apocryphal, but it is true nonetheless. Should such a an unjust, tyrannical government attempt to take root in this soil, it would not occur to me to emigrate to other soil; I would simply fight to uproot it, and pour whatever blood into this soil was needed, including my own, to kill it off.

What mythical wonder-apps are these? The general complaint these days about most of the apps is the difficulty in finding men who are actually down to fuck, in any position. In my experience, “hunting” is their primary function, second only to time-wasting. Frankly, I don’t buy that you’re interested in eliminating the “hunt” from the situation - quite the contrary. You talk about what a “challenge” it will be to seduce him. You talk about how “intriguing” it will be to go after him knowing as little as you do. This is the language of a sexual hunter who has selected a target and relishes the chase. “Nobody can take my dick easily(well okay at least most people)” 😐 Sure, dude, go with that. Claims that your massive cock will likely overwhelm his ability to take it might also come across like you’re packing an elephant gun…if one were to credit them. You don’t even know if he’s gay, so you have no idea whatsoever how many cocks he’s had or how seasoned his cunt might be. The more we read of this, the more it sounds like you’ve built a fantasy around this scenario and are planning to act on it as though it were real.

I don’t blame you, if your Twitter username is anything like your name here - Musk has sworn he’s going to get rid of all the ‘bots’.

Frankly I’ve always kind of wished some Top in a bathhouse would just tag me and take me right out in the open on one of the stairwells while other guys passed by…but no

The only bathhouse that I’ve been to where I’ve seen gloryholes had them arranged in a tiered fashion, which I assume is what you mean by a suck ramp. Breeding is not physically feasible.