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Conflict


Crown Heights

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I'm a pig. I always have been. I love sex. I love everything about it. The smell of a man. The taste of sweat. That moment of excitement when you know it's going to happen. The blissful feeling when your cock slides into a wet lout or a greasy hole.

I've fucked hundreds of men. I've been fucked by dozens. I've swallowed nearly a gallon of cum. Yet sometimes right after fucking I feel empty and lonely. Lonelier than before I busted my nutt

Does anyone else go through this? Is it just post-ejaculatory depression of some sort? It's a bit of a drag. It feels almost bi-polar. I can go to a sex party and fuck four or five guys, then as soon as I jizz in someone's ass I want to be as far away from there as possible.

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I do recognize that feeling. It's mostly with anon fucks in a 1-1 because that is all about getting fucked by that guy. Once the fuck is over there's nothing left really. Satisfied the lust but there is nothing else I want from the guy so want to leave ASAP or him to leave as soon as he's done. I don't always feel empty afterwards but it happens often enough. It's different with someone you know.

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I usually get really worked up before I fuck. I watch a lot of porn. I go to bookstores to unload after a stressful day at work quite often, so there's a fair amount of anticipation.

In the moment I'm a huge pig, but afterwards I sometimes feel really empty, almost guilty, as if I should direct all this energy towards one guy instead of fucking every Tom, Dick and Harry on the street.

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