Do you still cum in a bottom who asks you to pull out?

[ErosWired]

On 2/1/2022 at 6:52 PM, fskn said:

1. The assumption that cumming inside a bottom necessarily carries a health risk. Come on, we are barebackers! If any group of people is informed about, and attends to, sexual health, it is us.

[…]

Maybe some harms do result from an unwanted insemination, but with responsible bareback tops, health harms do not.

Informed about and attends to sexual health? This lot?  I never cease to be amazed at the face-palming level of ignorance about sexual health, safety and plain, prudent common sense that abounds on these boards. I don’t know where all these highly responsible barebackers you’re talking about hang out, but they’re fairly thin on the ground in general if what’s posted in this forum is any guide.

You offer yourself and your practices up as the example of why insemination doesn’t pose a health risk - and good for you, for being so responsible. But you simply aren’t typical of the majority. On the one hand we have men who lack even a rudimentary understanding of sexual disease cause and prevention, and on the other we find ourselves knee-deep in lunatics who actually want to either transmit or contract pathogens to become part of some nonsensical “brotherhood” of disease-ridden imbeciles.

Health harms do not result? Whew! That’s a relief - I could have sworn that the AIDS that nearly ended my life was the result of some guy cumming inside me. Glad we cleared that up. And the fact that I will always test positive for syphilis exposure now - good thing that didn’t have anything to do with barebacking. Because no barebacker would be irresponsible enough to transmit an STD, right?

Please be serious. Bareback sex is, without any doubt, a risky practice, and we all know it. Sexually transmitted disease is common, and recent statistics show it to be on the increase in some areas. Anecdotal accounts from the men on these boards commonly attest to the frequency that we contract STDs from bareback sex - pick any thread you like about how often we get an STD, and the evidence is plain.

If all men were as responsible, careful, and conscientious about their sexual practice as you describe yourself to be, your claim might have some resemblance to reality. But most are not, and the harms that result are real - so real, in fact, that I have to take medicine every day now because a guy fucked me raw. You can’t sugar-coat that pill.

[Beetle]

23 hours ago, Luxie-006 said:

I would love to have a cumdump bottom who asks to pull out when I’m about to come. Would be such a turnon to ignore them and dump my load deep inside. 

Given the downvotes received, let me be clear: I would like this a lot but only conditioned that it has been agreed upon in advance. It would be a fetish to agree in advance that the cumdum who wants to take the load cries to pull out at the very last minute and to ignore that order.

 

i would never do this if contrary to the consent or approval of the bottom. 

Edited February 3, 2022 by Luxie-006

[hntnhole]

6 hours ago, Luxie-006 said:

i would never do this if contrary to the consent or approval of the bottom. 

Well ..... thanks for clearing that up .... or would that be cleaning it up .... 

[BlackDude]

Yes. I pull out, don’t cum, then bounce. Don’t wait till I’m 50 strokes in to play games. 

[Fillitup57]

well first I would never ask a top to pull out- would be rude of me and if I did, would expect him not to do so.

[fskn]

On 2/2/2022 at 9:27 PM, ErosWired said:

Informed about and attends to sexual health? This lot?  I never cease to be amazed at the face-palming level of ignorance about sexual health, safety and plain, prudent common sense that abounds on these boards. I don’t know where all these highly responsible barebackers you’re talking about hang out, but they’re fairly thin on the ground in general if what’s posted in this forum is any guide.

You offer yourself and your practices up as the example of why insemination doesn’t pose a health risk - and good for you, for being so responsible. But you simply aren’t typical of the majority. On the one hand we have men who lack even a rudimentary understanding of sexual disease cause and prevention, and on the other we find ourselves knee-deep in lunatics who actually want to either transmit or contract pathogens to become part of some nonsensical “brotherhood” of disease-ridden imbeciles.

Health harms do not result? Whew! That’s a relief - I could have sworn that the AIDS that nearly ended my life was the result of some guy cumming inside me. Glad we cleared that up. And the fact that I will always test positive for syphilis exposure now - good thing that didn’t have anything to do with barebacking. Because no barebacker would be irresponsible enough to transmit an STD, right?

Please be serious. Bareback sex is, without any doubt, a risky practice, and we all know it. Sexually transmitted disease is common, and recent statistics show it to be on the increase in some areas. Anecdotal accounts from the men on these boards commonly attest to the frequency that we contract STDs from bareback sex - pick any thread you like about how often we get an STD, and the evidence is plain.

If all men were as responsible, careful, and conscientious about their sexual practice as you describe yourself to be, your claim might have some resemblance to reality. But most are not, and the harms that result are real - so real, in fact, that I have to take medicine every day now because a guy fucked me raw. You can’t sugar-coat that pill.

With all respect for your lived experience, much of what you wrote applied in the past or ignores my third point about the health mitigation options available — even to bottoms.

The purpose of my post was to reduce the blast radius, so to speak. I proposed a rational, harm-reduction framework that would allow people to consider which harms can easily be avoided and which harms cannot.

Once people acknowledge that for years there's been no reason for an unwanted insemination to cause HIV or any common STI for which no vaccine or cure is available (that leaves HSV, which is merely treatable), then people can focus their attention on the potential physical and psychological harms (violation of clear, advance consent, etc.) of an unwanted insemination (or of barebacking in general, noting that transmission can occur well before insemination, and the bottoms in our discussion have consented to bareback sex short of insemination).

To willfully ignore all the progress in sexual health for GLBT people, and the responsibility of all sexually active people, including bottoms, is buying into shame-based, heteronormative, religious fundamentalist, science-denying, fear-based, Anita Bryant thinking. GLBT people who still subscribe to the fiction that gay sex is likely to cause inevitable disease are worse than uninformed heteros; you're putting down members of our own community and giving our opponents a field day.

If a bottom (or a top, though you allege that almost all tops are irresponsible) does the following, then health harms are not a consequence of an unwanted insemination:

• Take PrEP (available since 2012 in the US)

• Get vaccinated for Hepatitis A (since 1995), Hepatitis B (since 1981, which surprised even me; I got this vaccination in the early 1990s), and HPV (since 2006 for young women; since 2009 for young men; since 2018 for adults, without the need for off-label prescribing, which was possible in the past)

• Get tested regularly for other common STIs, i.e., syphilis, gonorrhea, chlamydia, and Hepatitis C. These tests are all part of the US prescribing requirements for PrEP.

• Get treated in case any of the above STI tests is positive. Syphilis, gonorrhea, chlamydia, and Hepatitis C are all curable.

All of this is "standard of care" in the US — no sugarcoating.

Edited February 6, 2022 by fskn
Corrected gender terminology; added transmission before insemination

[pop2pond]

i always ask top to pull out, but it's me who pull their hip to breed inside me

 

Edited February 6, 2022 by pop2pond

[Guest]

I'm a bottom and when I'm about to provide a service to a top, I always say at the beginning whether or not I want him to release his load inside me. To agree to take a load, then, when the top is about to explode, to tell him to withdraw is insensitive and definitely wrong.  I have had many tops who, within just a few minutes of releasing their essence inside me, have asked if I wanted them to withdraw and of course, since I had agreed to having them explode inside me before they slipped their cocks inside me, I thanked them for asking, then I told them that I wanted to feel the sensation of their cocks exploding inside me.  In other words, I hadn't changed my mind about what I wanted to have happen.

However, if it happens, and I'm sure it has happened, that the guy who is bottoming is undecided whether or not to take the top's load, to be fair to the top (as well as to himself), he should not engage in that sexual transaction. 

[PozBearWI]

On 2/6/2022 at 12:54 AM, pop2pond said:

i always ask top to pull out, but it's me who pull their hip to breed inside me

 

Curious then, why are you asking in the first place?

[Nagato20]

I’m Vers here and I always let the top breed me and when I top I will always breed my bottom. I hate a good kid to go to waste. If you willing to fuck or get fucked then you willing to breed or get bred.

[justsexnowatl]

In 2022 I feel like this is a hypothetical situation - no one has asked me to pull out in years!  Barebacking and breeding is the norm and "expected".  But this thread was started in 2010, and I think "pulling out" to cum was fairly standard back then.  Things were different - I was a 100% barebacker but still "closeted" about it lol.  I was neg but hooked up with a lot of poz bottoms since they would let me cum inside them.  It was a little hard to find hot neg bb bottoms so when I did, I would honor their request to pull out if they'd let me fuck them raw.  One reason - out of respect, second reason - to keep their trust and get invited back to fuck again.  It still felt 1000 x better than wearing a condom.  I was the same when I bottomed back then  - I would ask tops to pull out, and they did (most of the time).  I was letting more and more guys breed me by 2014 when prep came out - somehow "dodged the bullet" for years - hottest thing was flip fucking with risky vers guys, and it's still the hottest thing to me now! 

[YourNoLimitsBottom]

I have always gone with the mindset that if the cock goes in bare, then the load is to be expected unless both top and bottom have some kind of discussion otherwise beforehand. Even then, if there is some kind of worry about STIs it is probably transmissible through precum, so the idea of getting fucked bare but telling him to pull out before cumming seems to make little sense. Sure, there can be more of a chance of infection from a complete load, but if you are already risking it from the precum then I am not sure what the point is.

I've always operated by being up front with the top. If we both want the load (give and take) or if we both want condom, then we go for it. If we have differing opinions then we shake hands or drink our beers or however we met to discuss our expectations and move on. No harm, no foul, and hopefully we made a friend in the process. I hear stories about bottoms that are desperate for the fuck and will agree to anything, and then change the terms once the clothes are off and hope the top is horny enough to go along with it. That leaves the top jaded and hurts the rest of us bottoms.

[alwaysready]

i have a slightly different situation than most guys. i begin to cum well b4 i have an orgasm, so i can breed, then pull out and go wild over the acme.  if he is taking raw seed, he is chasing. period. may be passive chasing, but it is chasing.

[BootmanLA]

1 hour ago, alwaysready said:

i have a slightly different situation than most guys. i begin to cum well b4 i have an orgasm, so i can breed, then pull out and go wild over the acme.  if he is taking raw seed, he is chasing. period. may be passive chasing, but it is chasing.

Not necessarily. A bottom on PrEP is not "chasing" even if he is "taking raw seed".

[BootmanLA]

2 hours ago, YourNoLimitsBottom said:

Sure, there can be more of a chance of infection from a complete load, but if you are already risking it from the precum then I am not sure what the point is.

1. Because people have differing ideas about what level of risk they're willing to take.

2. Because it doesn't matter what the point is - when a top agrees to not cum in a bottom and violates that agreement, it doesn't matter that he thinks the risk is pretty much the same as with his precum. What matters is that he unilaterally changed the terms of engagement and that's a shit thing to do. Period.