Avoiding 'SAFE' sex and getting more RAW COCK - any suggestions?

[rawsatyr]

So I need some clues from you veterans of the bare-fuck scene: on BBRT it's pretty clear -  bareback ONLY! So when the poz trick gets naked, rubbers aren't even there to kill the buzz! But to maximize 'dude-traffic' we all troll on grindr and scruff and whatever. I avoid the preachy  ones who are stubbornly 'safe sex only'. Kill the chat with kindness and pretenses. On the other hand PREP has made a few guys pretty forward. But some ON PREP still suddenly pull out condoms. Again others ask, just as you get to CLOSE THE DEAL: "DDF here here! U 2?! Right?" Or they talk like fuddy-duddies and say: "You are CLEAN right?" Lol, yes dude, I douched!  BORING! I understand in big cities you all have the luxury to say 'POZ and BAREBACK ONLY' You get action all day long and better yet, it isn't even a subject AT ALL!

With less-fortunate and MUCH-smaller gay community cities than say Atlanta, one has to tread lightly though. The medium minds in the back-waters are about 20 years behind! Can't let the cat out of the bag too quick. UNDETECTABLE is still not understood and some judgmental negative guys (i.e. in Jonesboro Arkansas) get evil and hostile towards guys who on their profile admit they are poz and/or UD. Actually verbally attacking their poz peers, questioning their RIGHT to even be on the app! So liars and stealthers do well in that repressive world. Some burned guys keep their status in the pictureless 'discreet' or don't care any more... Honesty doesn't seem to pay, but gets you a bad rep!

Yesterday a young guy told me he is poz and undetectable. Hell yeah let's play RAW, but he freaked out when I said I only do bareback... held back with me being poz/undetectable! You have to be careful here! Should I have reeled him in with pretense of 'rubbers ok' and then spring the raw deal on him? Have a 50/50 chance to get my way? 

Is it best (on say grindr chat) to skirt the bareback issue, only use suggestive 'euphemisms' about 'dark fantasies', 'no strings attached' and 'wanting to drop a load' or share pics of your ass being porked by a raw dick??? Wait what the reaction is? 

So question: A.) be stubbornly UP FRONT about everything but scare off prospective candidates for raw sex?

                      B.) Lie and be selfishly-deceptive about status, whether known or not: "Oh no I'm CLEAN! Don't worry, besides I'll PULL OUT before I cum!" ?

                      C.) Be 'vague', possibly drop obvious hints in chat and let it go forward hope it goes RAW? 

I'm leaning towards option C!

 

 

 

 

[Guest Dickmagnet]

DEFINANTLY  : B or go to stealthing works for me too.

[punaman]

B or C for me

 

[Veytoss]

Well, usually when on Grindr you use droplets emoticons in your name it is assumed You like it bareback, or am I wrong? 

[bbinbpark]

C tends to work for me, amazed how a little hint in the chat can make a guy want bare. Or almost every safe only guy here secretly hates condoms (likely)

[evilqueerpig]

It's definitely A for me.  My stock answer is "If it ain't bareback, it ain't fuckin and it ain't happenin, so don't waste my time or yours!"

[drscorpio]

17 hours ago, Veytoss said:

Well, usually when on Grindr you use droplets emoticons in your name it is assumed You like it bareback, or am I wrong? 

That's my assumption, but there a lot of clueless people on Grindr.

[Guest BBBoyfromTN]

B & C. Honesty is the best policy but you’re not gonna get much play sexually. Some guy need to develop a comfort level or rapport before they’ll go bare. It’s that way for me when it comes to sex. If I don’t know a guy I might not be open to sex, but if I get to know and like him I may be open. There’s some guys where I’m down regardless as they’re so ducking hot; other guys have to win me over. I can usually charm guys into considering bare or agreeing to it.

[chipygmalion80]

(C).

I drop hints like:

"big load"

"pump full"

"hungry hole"

"to dump in"

Some get it, some don't (or insist on condoms)

[bihairy]

I say be direct. Bareback only no pullouts. It is what I say. If they don't want bare then no fuck.  I top bareback only.

[analluv27]

As a guy who bottoms I'm more with option C. A lot of my profiles are vague and if they don't ask I won't really offer. And in regards to bareback I prefer raw but I leave the final decision to the top

[Ozpig]

It is a hard one for me - being a slut and totally addicted to being fucked - I let men fuck me with condoms if they wish (I always suck their seed out of it anyway) but I prefer raw. If I have tops over to my apartment I always make it clear it is raw I want and I only have a couple back off. I can't understand any self respecting bottom not wanting a man in them raw and blowing in them.

[Guest]

C - Although I'm in Atlanta and consider bareback to be the "norm" now, it wasn't that long ago when it wasn't.  Even now my scruff profile isn't totally direct, but my stats are just VERS and PREP.  If I see a profile that has PREP or treatment as prev I automatically assume raw even if their profile says condoms too.  At that point I don't hesitate to use the words breed or unload in a private chat.    There are enough barebackers now that I don't really wanna waste time with guys I need to convince BUT before it was like this I would go slower and be willing to work on a guy for a while if he was hot.  I had plenty of guys that just wanted to play once or twice "safe" or oral only before they'd get comfortable doing raw.  With the added complcation of being poz/U I guess you've gotta tread more lightly with neg guys in smaller community.  If they're hot enough to put some time in developing some "trust" I'd agree to whatever makes them comfortable in order to get face to face in the same room and take it slow.  Once you're in the same room and the cocks are hard, attitudes can change pretty fast, but you gotta get in the same room and not scare them off lol.  

[barecubtop]

I'm voting A or C, but I have to add the caveat that I'm a top and on PrEP. 

I live in what most of you would consider a small town, but we have a major university and I'm within a couple hours of both Indianapolis and Chicago.  There are maybe 2-3 guys on BBRTS in my town (but none that I've met up with, go figure).  On Scruff, I advertise that I'm on PrEP but don't specifically call out that I'm into BB, but there are very few people who actually respond on Scruff around here.  I get many more replies on Scruff when I'm in the bigger cities.  On Grindr, I'm pretty straightforward.  I used the devil and pig emoticons for awhile and some guys asked me what they were for (eyeroll).  Now, my Grindr profile doesn't specifically say anything about BB, but when I'm talking to a bottom who wants to fuck, I am pretty blunt about preferring bare and will say something like "I have other options, thanks" if they insist on condoms.  Do I get a LOT of action? No, but usually enough to keep me satisfied and not feeling guilty about any kind of lying or stealthing.   But, as others will say on here, you'd be surprised at how many are willing to go bare that say "safe only" or something in their profiles.

[rawloadstaken]

7 hours ago, barecubtop said:

But, as others will say on here, you'd be surprised at how many are willing to go bare that say "safe only" or something in their profiles.

That's something that amuses me to no end. I get tops with "safe only" in their profile message me and tell me they only use condoms, and when I point out my screen name, about half of them give the "oh, maybe just this once" excuse and ask if I'm really willing to bareback.