Finding Men for Violent or Rough Sex

[ErosWired]

@Marlarbar - Excellent explanation! Merci beaucoup!

[Marlarbar]

43 minutes ago, ErosWired said:

@Marlarbar - Excellent explanation! Merci beaucoup!

Haha  Avec plaisir  

[Qban]

9 hours ago, ErosWired said:

So, why do you think you need the stimulus of the faux struggle, rather than simply relishing the opportunity you have to fuck him as violently as you want without meaningful resistance? Is there a difference between the brutal fucking a faggot gets when he’s been legitimately overpowered by a superior Man, and the kind of brutal fucking a faggot gets from  Top showing him his true place among Men?

The difference for me at least is that it’s not strictly a top/bottom D/s thing with a script and a preordained conclusion.  It’s an actual struggle between two equally matched vers guys to see which of us can overpower and force the other one to submit - doesn’t matter in the least whether it’s him or me.  In fact, if the session is long enough both of us will probably wind up getting overpowered and fucked by the other at some point.  

It’s a little nontraditional in that neither man has a traditionally preset role so both of you have to be confident and comfortable enough winding up on either side of the coin, and admittedly it’s pretty rare to find other guys who are into this sort of thing, but it honestly is all about the power struggle and competition for domination, regardless of who winds up where.  When the chemistry is right the sex is some of the best I’ve ever had - intense, no holds barred rough sex between two guys.  Does that make sense?

Edited September 23, 2019 by Qban

[manseeker]

On 9/20/2019 at 9:01 PM, Ozpig said:

I have one "straight" (well he is married) top who fucks me every month or so and he is the roughest top I have ever had. He is verbal, he punches me , slaps me that hard I have often been bruised, chokes me if I make a pleasured sound,  spits in my face. There has never been a tactile moment between us in the four years he has been using me - just making me gag on his cock and he fucks like an animal. Very little conversation unless it is to humiliate and abuse me. But I have never not been available when he wants to come over, as he is always good for a 20 minute pounding and he then drags me in the bathroom and pissed on me. I wish he would come over more often, but he runs the show and he probably has other sub bottoms he uses. That is one reason I never refuse him as he is pig arrogant and I don't think he would take a knockback well and probably move onto the next hole.

What’s his number ? Or can you send him my way !

[ErosWired]

1 hour ago, Qban said:

The difference for me at least is that it’s not strictly a top/bottom D/s thing with a script and a preordained conclusion.  It’s an actual struggle between two equally matched vers guys to see which of us can overpower and force the other one to submit - doesn’t matter in the least whether it’s him or me.  In fact, if the session is long enough both of us will probably wind up getting overpowered and fucked by the other at some point.  

It’s a little nontraditional in that neither man has a traditionally preset role so both of you have to be confident and comfortable enough winding up on either side of the coin, and admittedly it’s pretty rare to find other guys who are into this sort of thing, but it honestly is all about the power struggle and competition for domination, regardless of who winds up where.  When the chemistry is right the sex is some of the best I’ve ever had - intense, no holds barred rough sex between two guys.  Does that make sense?

It does - and that is the reason Kink . Com has an entire channel devoted to wrestling in which the loser gets punish-fucked.

In fact, your scenario is far easier to understand than that of an Total Top/Alpha/Dom and a total bottom/cumdump/faggot, which seems to be a very differently motivated scenario for both participants. It’s that kind of fucking I was originally asking about, because that’s the kind I would be involved in, though your explanation I think really helps define the parameters of the conversation,

[tallslenderguy]

1 hour ago, Qban said:

The difference for me at least is that it’s not strictly a top/bottom D/s thing with a script and a preordained conclusion.  It’s an actual struggle between two equally matched vers guys to see which of us can overpower and force the other one to submit - doesn’t matter in the least whether it’s him or me.  In fact, if the session is long enough both of us will probably wind up getting overpowered and fucked by the other at some point.  

It’s a little nontraditional in that neither man has a traditionally preset role so both of you have to be confident and comfortable enough winding up on either side of the coin, and admittedly it’s pretty rare to find other guys who are into this sort of thing, but it honestly is all about the power struggle and competition for domination, regardless of who winds up where.  When the chemistry is right the sex is some of the best I’ve ever had - intense, no holds barred rough sex between two guys.  Does that make sense?

Hell yes it makes sense!  i really love and appreciate this insightful and open explanation of who and how you are. i wish more guys had such self knowledge and the ability to articulate their feelings, needs and desires. 

i don't relate to the desire/need for the physical or "rough" struggle. in fact, i have an aversion to perceived bullying or physical force.  As best i can tell, it's probably a reaction on my part to being physically bullied and beat up as a kid. Looking back i realize i was 'sub' in nature from as early an age as i can remember. i sought out boys as friends who were 'dom' in nature and had crushes on several of them.  i think that i must have thrown off signals and attracted dom guys in general. Of course, as children, none of us had much understanding or sophistication and we were all playing out "The Lord of the Flies."  But even as a kid, i learned what worked and what didn't and learned to hide my sub side.  

As an adult, i practiced marshal arts and have a second degree black belt. The sub in me has always resisted bulking up with weights, so i'm a tall skinny guy, but i can break concerte with my hand lol, so it's sort of deceptive. The thing is, all my training is sort of deadly and destructive, so i'd never use it in a sexual context.  But i got into marshall arts, in part, to compensate for being beaten up on as a kid. i didn't like it then and don't like it now. Weirdly, i enjoy sparring immensely, but find most of my joy in sparring as being a part of the dance with another guy, not winning by striking the deciding blow. i perplexed more than a few sparring partners when i praised them for landing a punch or kick on me while sparring (and i didn't give them that, it was full 'competition'). But that was all controlled with protection and pulled punches and kicks that can kill or cause severe harm.  i've experienced a few guys who wanted to get rough during sex and have had to control myself from reacting with pent up childhood rage lol.  In a contest of strength, i'd lose to a lot of guys. In a contest of actual fighting, i'd win because most don't have my training. 

Okay, that's physical.  As noted, i identify as "sub" and know intimately how true that is. It really seems to be an intrinsic part of my nature as far back into childhood as i can remember.  But it doesn't manifest in a physical contest of fighting, rather in an intellectual/emotional 'contest' of wills?  i submit to seduction, but it is a contest and i don't just submit to anyone.  So in that way, i really relate to this, but still from a bottom/sub perspective. i know versatile guys are different from me because of their nature their needs are met on either side of the equation, mine aren't. 

Differently, my ideal connection is with a 'total Top/Dom', the Yang to my yin. To me, at it's basic form, it's physics, the attraction and bonding of opposites. 

[Marlarbar]

I love to read how we are often different when it's about sex. It's so rich and complexe !

[raunchycumslut]

I usually don’t get into being slapped or hit. Lately though, I’ve been trying to get my tops to fuck me harder/rougher. I don’t like being a pushy bottom so I don’t tell my tops what to do, I just let them know they don’t need to hold back, my ass can take a pounding. I don’t want to be abused, I just like submitting to a man using my ass as a fuckhole.

It seems most tops, even when told they can be rough, are either not into rough sex or can’t get over the worry they’ll hurt me. Then there’s tops who are the reverse, they don’t just use my ass, they don’t even really fuck me, it’s more they are stabbing me/trying to injure me with their cock. I like being used for a man’s sexual pleasure, but being used as a punching bag or to satisfy a sadistic streak is not fun for me.

When I do get to hookup and be used by a guy, have him realize I’m a faggot bottom, and take advantage of me offering up my ass to him, not trying to hurt me as he fucks me but not caring if I get a bit sore/tore up from being used, that’s the sex I enjoy the most.

[ErosWired]

3 hours ago, raunchycumslut said:

When I do get to hookup and be used by a guy, have him realize I’m a faggot bottom, and take advantage of me offering up my ass to him, not trying to hurt me as he fucks me but not caring if I get a bit sore/tore up from being used, that’s the sex I enjoy the most.

There - that’s what I’m talking about, what I’m trying to find, along with the addition that the Top takes it for granted that he can fuck me with abandon, throw his whole sexual self into it, Dominate me, hate-fuck me, cock me down, own me - whether it’s simply all about him, or whether he wants to show me how a Man fucks a faggot.

[Guest BritBottom]

On 9/23/2019 at 1:14 AM, CumBustion said:

Tease the Top, coax the animal out of him. I find a lotta Tops wanna pound the shit outta a bottom but go vanilla so they don't scare them off. They can't come off too dom at first, unless it was communicated before had that you want them to be that way. Flirt with them before hand. Tell them how you want "Big Daddy" to fuck you balls deep while smacking your ass. Tell them "You want me to deep throat your meat? Well then make me!" "Hate fuck your nut into me, Daddy!" Its all about communication and mental stimulation.

Brilliant _ wish I could have said it as well!

[ErosWired]

On 9/22/2019 at 8:14 PM, CumBustion said:

Tease the Top, coax the animal out of him. I find a lotta Tops wanna pound the shit outta a bottom but go vanilla so they don't scare them off. They can't come off too dom at first, unless it was communicated before had that you want them to be that way. Flirt with them before hand. Tell them how you want "Big Daddy" to fuck you balls deep while smacking your ass. Tell them "You want me to deep throat your meat? Well then make me!" "Hate fuck your nut into me, Daddy!" Its all about communication and mental stimulation.

I’m getting different strategies suggested by different guys here. @CuriousDallas above indicates that he acts as though he doesn’t want rough play in order to attract those kind of Tops; @ChainedBoy above says he makes his preference known up front with mixed results; and here, @CumBustion suggests teasing the Top and challenging him to treat you roughly, making it known it’s okay. So, tell them, don’t tell them, throw hints at them - I see the ups and downs of each strategy, but not which is most effective in actually getting violently fucked.

And more importantly, no one has really addressed the key question yet, which is: Where does a guy go to find Tops who enjoy fucking the hell out of bottoms? There was the one suggestion of Recon, but I’m sure not everyone here who’s getting pile-driven has to go to Recon for it. So where do you find them? Where do they gather, lurk, hunt? And, critically, how do you know one when you find one?