Is fucking with a married guy (married to a woman) that bad?

[PozBearWI]

1 hour ago, ellentonboy said:

I don’t feel I am being selfish, it is the cheater that is. He has a wife that can do all the things I can do, plus give him children. But like I mentioned earlier, if I were to say no, another guy would jump at the chance to be with him.

He was the one that disclosed he was married, I don’t ask personal questions like that. He has been coming over for at least four years, he now has a child, and I let him contact me, I don’t text him or do anything to jeopardize his marriage. 

Again, I don’t think I am being selfish, he’s the one that has to deal with that when he looks at his wife after being at my place. I put that out of my mind, it is his decision to play, I don’t force the issue. I am not putting a gun to his head, you know?

There is a fellow who lives a few miles from me; married and ostensibly straight.  For the past 10 years he hits me up about once a year or so for a blow job.  In the grand scheme of things I don't make his problem my problem.  However were we fucking; yeah, no.  At that point i would be pretty directly exposing her to any STI's I might pass on without her consent.  

[BootmanLA]

3 hours ago, ellentonboy said:

I don’t feel I am being selfish, it is the cheater that is. He has a wife that can do all the things I can do, plus give him children. But like I mentioned earlier, if I were to say no, another guy would jump at the chance to be with him.

He was the one that disclosed he was married, I don’t ask personal questions like that. He has been coming over for at least four years, he now has a child, and I let him contact me, I don’t text him or do anything to jeopardize his marriage. 

Again, I don’t think I am being selfish, he’s the one that has to deal with that when he looks at his wife after being at my place. I put that out of my mind, it is his decision to play, I don’t force the issue. I am not putting a gun to his head, you know?

Here's how I see it. Yes, he might well have some other guy jump at the chance to be with him. But that other guy would be the problematic one, not you. So it's not that by refusing him, you'd be saving his wife the hurt she'd likely feel if she found out; it's that you're not being COMPLICIT in the deception and hurt. To me, being complicit in such, just for the sake of getting fucked occasionally, is selfish - I'm cashing in on a benefit while being an active part of what's going to hurt her (almost certainly) someday.

Not saying you have to adopt my viewpoint - just explaining why *I* find it selfish. The fact that he's initiating it, and is the primary factor in causing the hurt, doesn't mean his partners aren't part of the problem too.

[Knotme]

On 8/22/2024 at 2:26 AM, BootmanLA said:

Except, of course, the wife who gets the STI or HIV from the cheating husband. Or just the emotional devastation from finding out her husband is cheating on her. 

That’s why I dont fuck with guys in a relationship with a woman and are still sexually active together.  I only fuck raw, and as we know the incidence of STI’s in the gay scene is high.

It would be the worst way I can imagine for a woman to “find out” about her partner, if he has to tell her to go get treated.

[Ieatcumholes]

10 hours ago, BootmanLA said:

So... I wouldn't fuck my underaged kids, if I had them. But it's fine if someone else does his own, and I "shouldn't try to live anybody's else life for them"?

I wouldn't steal from my friends' houses if I go visit, but it's fine if someone else does, because I shouldn't judge?

I could go on and on, but it boils down to: Do we give everyone a pass for behavior we ourselves wouldn't do, no matter how offensive or harmful it might be, in the name of "not trying to live anybody else's life for them"?

I don't see the situations as being comparable, so let's agree to disagree.

Edited August 23 by Ieatcumholes

[KindaBasic]

I try not to judge other people and what they do. Personally, when I am in a relationship I am extremely monogamous, and prefer my partner is as well. But that is just me. Other people’s infidelity is between them and their partner. 

[BootmanLA]

10 hours ago, Ieatcumholes said:

I don't see the situations as being comparable, so let's agree to disagree.

We certainly can agree to disagree. But the underlying principle is the same: whether or not one may legitimately judge a person for that person's transgressions that harm another. I'm not sure why you think "not judging a guy who's married to a woman who has no idea and would be hurt if she knew" is different, in principle, from "not judging a guy who will steal from his friends if left alone in their house". Except, of course, in the first instance, you're getting something out of it (sex with the guy). I just think it's valid to consider whether that benefit is coloring your judgment, or rather, the lack of benefiting from the second guy's thievery is.

[verslut]

When I was young and dumb, I hooked up with a straight daddy on a business trip. I made him cum twice and enjoyed the experience. I don't know what happened to him. Maybe he went back to his everyday life with his family. Or maybe I destroyed his marriage. Now that I'm older I don't play with cheating partners. And I've never cheated on a partner.

[Ieatcumholes]

16 hours ago, BootmanLA said:

We certainly can agree to disagree. But the underlying principle is the same: whether or not one may legitimately judge a person for that person's transgressions that harm another. I'm not sure why you think "not judging a guy who's married to a woman who has no idea and would be hurt if she knew" is different, in principle, from "not judging a guy who will steal from his friends if left alone in their house". Except, of course, in the first instance, you're getting something out of it (sex with the guy). I just think it's valid to consider whether that benefit is coloring your judgment, or rather, the lack of benefiting from the second guy's thievery is.

Having sex with someone who is married is at worst immoral. The other situations you listed are illegal. >> I << don't see those as being equal, but apparently you do. And instead of going back and forth with you when neither of us is probably going to change our minds, I'd rather agree to disagree and use that time and energy for more productive pursuits...

[alko]

On 8/21/2024 at 7:50 AM, Hewantsmepoz said:

Some people get off on the act of cheating and I’ve seen str8 and gay have that fetish. I prefer married tops for a variety of reasons - 

- they fuck me like a pussy and for a long time bc that’s what they are brain washed to do 

- I give them the ass they really want and don’t get at home or not enough of and I give it up as good as I can and since I keep it very discreet I’m more likely to get repeats that nobody else is getting 

- sorry wifey - should be taking better care of your guy - but hey, you should be happy bc I’m not trying to steal him, no pregnancy scares and I’m doing what you don’t want  to 

 

i totally agree

[hntnhole]

Most interesting discussion above.  

All I have to say is, I wouldn't knowingly be a part of a destructive act.  

That said, I'm absolutely certain that I've fucked guys on the dl (either from a wife or cheating on a bf) in the fuckjoints. 

The way I see it, if they're in that kind of joint, part of the act of breeding them is not interviewing them to find out what's none of my business in the first place.  They're there (pardon the awkwardism) to either fuck or get fucked, and whatever baggage they may be carrying is theirs alone.  I'm not a relationship counselor, I'm just another horny guy that needs to unload in a cumdump that needs what I have. If anyone thinks that's shallow, well - it is what it is.  

They have what I need, I have what they need, and that's the extent of it.  

[PozTalkAuthor]

I had sex (top and bottom) with a married man, yes. But his marriage was at the end - now we're stable partners for almost 2 years.

First time we had sexual contacts I had no regard about his marital situation because it was clear they hadn't been sexually faithful to each other for years.

Being the other half? From the gay side I have been the one cheated repeatedly and it wasn't pleasant at all -brought consequences-. That's why I tend to avoid any approach with married (closeted) guys. Now I have the world next to me and I have no need to hookup outside, but that mechanism of secret, exaggerated attention, and so on... turns me off.

Had good sexting here with a couple married guys but even virtually and with no faces shown, it's not the same as playing with openly gay. There's always an uncomfortable aura I don't like at all.

[BootmanLA]

On 8/24/2024 at 2:11 AM, Ieatcumholes said:

Having sex with someone who is married is at worst immoral. The other situations you listed are illegal. >> I << don't see those as being equal, but apparently you do. And instead of going back and forth with you when neither of us is probably going to change our minds, I'd rather agree to disagree and use that time and energy for more productive pursuits...

Actually, I'll agree with you on the fact that one situation is a question of legality and the other is not. 

But the discussion wasn't "is it legal to fuck someone else's husband?" but "is it BAD (ie morally wrong) to do that?" 

 

[ktopper]

I am married to a woman and I fuck around with both men and other women. My relationship with my wife has been sexless for over a decade. We had a very good sex life for years but she came down with a bad case of bible-thumperism and we grew apart, emotionally and philosophically. Even when we were still enjoying sex as a married couple I am positive she was cheating on me. The unmistakable smell of another man's cum in her panties after a night out with her "girl friends" was rather suspicious. And believe me, I know what cum smells and tastes like. I didn't let it bother me much, in fact it kind of turned me on. I also fucked around on her so it made us kind of even. I got tested for HIV and other STIs often because I really didn't want to infect her. But that is no longer an issue so I indulge in fucking a horny gay bottom every chance I get with zero guilt or regrets.

People wonder why I don't get a divorce from her since we have became nothing more than house mates, she has her bedroom and I have mine  and we do almost nothing together. She has her friends and I have mine. I don't divorce her for financial reasons. Even if I let her have the house she would have a hard time paying property tax and upkeep on it. I don't mind helping her out financially, I think I owe her that. And at 72 I am not looking at getting into a committed relationship with another woman, I prefer sex with men. I like fuck buddies but not enough to marry one or even live with him.

I own a vacation cabin miles away from anyone and I just spent most of the summer there. It is off the grid with a solar system for power, enough to run a refrigerator and freezer, lights, a microwave oven, well pump, etc. No internet (which explains my absence from this forum). It's a good place to get away from the wife for awhile, She is not what one would consider a nice person, she is a classic case of NPD. Early in the summer I had several relatives and friends show up at the cabin one afternoon and was introduced to a guy, 39 YO. Everyone was drinking beer and then switched to Black Velvet and I kept getting gay vibes from this guy and also noticed he had a really nice fuckable ass. His gaydar was also evidently beeping loudly concerning me. He showed up to visit the next afternoon and we ended up fucking. He visited 4 more times during the summer. Life is good!

So yeah, I cheat and have no regrets about it.

[CumBustion]

On 8/20/2024 at 8:44 AM, Sharp-edge said:

Once it was a fantasy of many. Now you get to hear nasty comments that he's a cheater and whatever and blah blah.

But in my mind, he's just a horny guy who needs another horny guy to take good care of him. Is it thad bad?

Some of my best fucks and fav Tops are M married to F. Most of them were married for several years, fell into that rut, wife stopped giving it up, she gives lazy blowjobs (if at all), became a literal cunt, etc. 

This one guy I know, late 40s (50s now), about 6”, bald with a goatee. They had kids very early and they were all grown and out of the house by now. He worked in construction so he had a muscle dad bod that came from decades of hard labor, but he also had a beer gut that oddly had abs. His dick wasn’t very long, maybe 7”, but fuck it was thick. Best of all (or worst, depending on your POV), this man was a sexual tyrant. When ever we fucked, it was like he was unleashing centuries of pent up sexual frustration and  energy on my holes. 

We met on Grindr and chatted for a few days until it was finally clear to meet up at his place since his worst half went on a Bitchez night out. I knew I was going to be in for a rough time by the way he described what he wanted to do to me, but his actions were next level. Needless to say, I went home three hours later feeling like my jaw was dislocated, my nipples got twisted off, and everytime the wind blew, I could feel a rush of cold air blow up into my gaping boi pussy. The entire back of my shorts was coated in lube, spit, and cum tinged with blood. 

I could probably write a book about this man and the shit he did to me. He did confide in me that I was his favorite fuck (apparently he had been fucking with other bois and girls) because he felt like he could really let go with me and let his rapey side out. 

Bottom line, married “straight” men are some of the best dick you can get.

[Njn0mc]

38 minutes ago, CumBustion said:

Some of my best fucks and fav Tops are M married to F. Most of them were married for several years, fell into that rut, wife stopped giving it up, she gives lazy blowjobs (if at all), became a literal cunt, etc. 

This one guy I know, late 40s (50s now), about 6”, bald with a goatee. They had kids very early and they were all grown and out of the house by now. He worked in construction so he had a muscle dad bod that came from decades of hard labor, but he also had a beer gut that oddly had abs. His dick wasn’t very long, maybe 7”, but fuck it was thick. Best of all (or worst, depending on your POV), this man was a sexual tyrant. When ever we fucked, it was like he was unleashing centuries of pent up sexual frustration and  energy on my holes. 

We met on Grindr and chatted for a few days until it was finally clear to meet up at his place since his worst half went on a Bitchez night out. I knew I was going to be in for a rough time by the way he described what he wanted to do to me, but his actions were next level. Needless to say, I went home three hours later feeling like my jaw was dislocated, my nipples got twisted off, and everytime the wind blew, I could feel a rush of cold air blow up into my gaping boi pussy. The entire back of my shorts was coated in lube, spit, and cum tinged with blood. 

I could probably write a book about this man and the shit he did to me. He did confide in me that I was his favorite fuck (apparently he had been fucking with other bois and girls) because he felt like he could really let go with me and let his rapey side out. 

Bottom line, married “straight” men are some of the best dick you can get.

Love to read what your meetup was like and what he did.. I bet hot!