ErosWired

@rawTOP - Are we also concerned about references to “whoring out”, particularly where they involve instances of one person offering the services of another, even though no consideration may change hands? Does this meet the definition of trafficking as concerns the statute? We have discussions on here in which Tops give the opinion that cash in such exchanges is an important part of the experience, even though it’s not the reason the bottom chooses to do it.

@unitedforces91 - Confidence is one thing, but social phobia/severe social anxiety can indicate an imbalance in brain neurotransmitters, and can be treatable. I would encourage you to talk to your doctor and be evaluated so see if you might benefit from certain medications that might assist you in overcoming the reluctance that's keeping you out of social settings. Social and conversation skills can be learned; in fact, at the bathhouse, there's not a lot of talking involved. I'm actually quite unsophisticated when it comes to knowing all the social codes and winks and nods and come-hithers, but I still manage to do very well. You might find going to a bathhouse surprisingly relaxing. It's basically like a spa for men, where things sometimes get sexy. Depending on which one you go to, there may be a steam room, a dry sauna, a hot tub/whirlpool, showers, exercise equipment, lounge areas with videos playing, locker rooms for changing clothes, private changing rooms where you can relax, and other rooms where... other things happen. You're not obliged to do anything. If you wish, you can simply sit in the steam room and steam the impurities out of your body (Personally I have to be careful about that - if I stay too long steaming out my impurities, there won't be anything left of me.) Or just enjoy the eye candy from the comfort of the hot tub or the lounge. But eventually you'll probably catch the eye of someone who thinks you look tasty, and you'd find that making contact is really quite easy.

This is serious. It has implications all over the internet. Sites like this and BBRTS could easily vanish, at least for a time, until challenges to the law work their way through the courts, or a change of government works through repeal.

I think it depends on what the “onus” is in the bottom’s mind. If the encounter is going to be a relatively quick fuck by a cock of average proportions, there is no need to do more prep than to clear out the rectum and perhaps a short area into the descending colon. Such douching need not be time- consuming. If there will be acrobatics, on the other hand, or repeated entry, or multiple players, or plus-sized equipment, then the Deluxe Package is warranted. I tend to always go the latter route, but I don’t have any FBs, and I don’t get fucked regularly - only when I plan for it. I imagine some bottoms who become preoccupied with a concern about the dual-purpose nature of the orifice may not be able to get themselves into the right headspace to change douchegears as appropriate (for my part I never could get past it enough to rim anyone).

Shopping list made.

[I want to preface this entry with a word to any readers whose heritage is Native American. The experiences I describe below are a true account, and my narrative of them is as objective as I can make it. My interpretation of the meaning of the events is naturally filtered by my own cultural lens, but also by my professional role, one that has to a degree sensitized me to the history, realities, and sensitivities of Native Americans. I assure you that my contemplation on the nature of the experience derives not from crude stereotyping or assumption but from my observations and from a spiritual sense inherent to myself that I find difficult to describe but that I can only swear to be genuine.] I once hooked up a few times with a Top who was a nice guy, but when he fucked me, a strange sort of change came over him. He was, as it happened, a Lakota, and each time he started dicking me down he would suddenly become very aggressive, grab me by my neck from behind with one hand and grab a handful of my hair with the other and force my head down flat sideways on the bed, my torso stetched out so that my pelvis was ground under him for deepest possible penetration. Then he would lean over and start saying angry, harsh words in my ear in Lakota, but which I couldn’t understand, and he would punctuate each phrase by spitting on me - on my back, on my ass, on the back of my neck. After some of this, he would then fuck me savagely until he came, then yank my head back by my hair as he let me go. The next moment he was exactly the same as before we had started, almost as though a different person had walked into the room (naked). I realize this sounds spacey and all New Age and shit, (never mind race stereotyping) but I always felt as though that guy wasn’t actually the one fucking me. It felt as though the person fucking me was full of rage, and these fuckings were actually rapes counted as coup for far worse wrongs done to helpless people generations ago. It was the spitting - something I really don’t like anyway - the hate and ferocity embodied in each blast, each one bursting through tight lips like a knife blade into my naked back as he stabbed me repeatedly lower down, that told me this wasn’t about sex. Lying there under the domination of his hands, listening to those unfamiliar, berating words spat at me, followed by the smack of his saliva, feeling cruel force ravage my body and then triumphantly fill me with itself - I could not escape the thought that this man must be channelling the spirits of some warrior of the First Peoples come to claim justice for his people from mine. Not long ago I took one of the AncestryDNA tests to find out where my people came from. I’m basically 100% British Isles. No wonder I ended up the target ass for his justice fucking. And do you know what? I’m okay with that. My ancestors did horrible, horrible things to people, rape included. Maybe I’m nuts and this is all in my head, but if raping my ass can give a few of those poor souls their rest, then let them rape me. The bill is overdue. I just wish they wouldn’t spit.

Do you have any suggestions?

I’m not a fan of dry fucking, and not crazy about spit, either. If I’m going to offer up my ass, I make sure it’s lubed to perfection - a machine so well-oiled that the pistons can thrust in and out for thousands of miles and the chambers can fire over and over again without the need to take it back in to the shop.

@InsatiableBoy - I've been a cumdump for CumUnion the last couple of months, so here's a little advice from my experience: 1. Things to take with you: Poppers (if you use them), a hand towel, a small flashlight, a sharpie pen, your choice of lube, a cord/charger/adapter for your cell phone 2. Give yourself a full, thorough cleanout before you go. Take the time to do it properly and make sure you're empty. Right before you "open for business", take a few minutes to stretch your hole with your fingers or with a toy; I use an anal speculum. 3. You may want to bring a variety of lubes - I bring both a jar of Anal Glide (petrolatum-based) and a bottle of silicone-based lube. I pre-treat my hole with the silicone-based but use the petrolatum-based for most of the lubing. I have found that if you leave a bottle of silicone-based lube sitting around some Top will invariably take the top off of it to try to lube his cock or your ass up, spill half of it on the floor, create a slipping hazard, and waste half of your lube. Instead, leave the petrolatum-based lube out for others to access. It's like vaseline, so it won't spill. 4. Remember that half of what makes the steak appetizing is the sizzle - be mindful of how you look and sound to others while you are being fucked. You don't want to come off as over-the-top or playacting, but guys want to enjoy your natural responsiveness to sex. Don't just bury your face in a pillow. Let your expressions show. Let your face express your ecstasy. Arch your back in pleasure if that's what you feel. Be vocal if that's your style... in fact, be maybe a little louder than usual if you're trying to attract more tops to you. (Don't go too crazy, though - remember, some people are annoyed by screaming bottoms.) Let them know you're lusty. 5. Be prepared to put up with a little abuse if you want to maximize your opportunity for loads; the last time I went, one Top started beating my ass with something made of leather, and smacked it across my balls a couple of times. Now, I'm used to BDSM, and I've been flogged plenty, so this was no big deal for me, and it paid of with a savage fuck later. You have to decide for yourself how much abuse you're willing to take to get your loads. 6. If you're lying ass-up waiting for Tops to take you, don't just lie there like a pudding; put some seduction into it. If there's music playing, let your hips get into it a little. Maybe reach around from time to time and spread your cheeks so the hole winks at them. If I sense a Top pause at the door to my room at the bathhouse, I'll put a little play in my hips or flex my glutes just a little like nobody's watching, and sometime's I'll hear the Top say, "Whew..." Hooked. 7. Do the rounds. Don't just stay in one place waiting for the to come to you (unless they are and there's a line forming). Move around and show yourself off so they know you're on the menu. If it's a venue where you have a room, and there's a bulletin board or a blackboard, don't be shy about a little self-promotion, like writing "Great Ass in room 107". 8. Eat, drink and be merry. That is, don't forget to take care of your body by getting something to eat, stay hydrated, and relax. Don't worry about setting yourself some crazy load goal or setting high expectations - just take what comes and enjoy the adventure. Easygoing is sexy. Have fun!

@BBBoyfromTN - Thank you very much for taking the time to share that in detail. I wonder if you would mind elaborating on a couple of points. The process you describe is similar in some ways to what I do when I basically whore myself out at a hotel, but with some implied differences. I've never had an issue with guys wanting more than fucking, albeit I've been fucked lots of different ways. But I haven't had any request for kink or fetish play. Is this something that arises if a Top is whoring out a bottom and a consideration is changing hands - i.e., the payer is expecting more because he is paying, and therefore a negotiation occurs? I know what I would put in an ad to whore out myself, but how would you phrase one as a Top whoring a bottom. Especially, how would you do it on CL to avoid getting the ad pulled by their censors? And since you suggest stating what day it will be on, how far in advance would you post it? Do you find that many men actually plan their fucking rather than respond off-the-cuff to a current ad? In your ad, do you make it clear that you are whoring out the bottom, rather that a bottom is being whored out, and that you are acting as the "broker"? Do you find that that opens up more interest from different types of men, especially those with special interests or special desires or expectations for the bottom to fulfill, and thus for you to negotiate? Was this for security, traffic control, revenue collection, all of the above? Were you waiting inside or outside? (I ask because I assume some men want their privacy.) If a Top is whoring out a bottom, do you believe he should always be present to do this, or are there situations in which the bottom can look after himself if the Top has "filtered out" the most obviously problematic clients? Is there a passphrase at the door, like: "The moon is out tonight" or "Coming into the tunnel" or "Be careful what you ask for"?

In the news today, France has proposed setting their AOC to 15 after two acquittals for rapes of 11-year-olds because it could not be proven that the sex was forced. There has to be some system to protect children from monsters. @BillyBareback - I don't think you meant for me to, but I actually agree with both of these sentences. Well, the first one in principle, except that far, far too many parents aren't engaged enough in their children's lives to do this successfully, or are just woefully inept - the sum total of my sex education from my dad - and I shit you not - consisted of "muttermuttermutter keep it in your pants." Somewhere around 13. I had no clue what he was talking about. All my sister got from our mom was "Don't sit in men's laps." Now, for my part, dad's advice was no problem, because I'm pretty sure he wasn't talking about my ass... As for kids being bright enough to say no but too stupid for yes? Yep. Well, not stupid, perhaps, but not savvy enough for yes. "No" in the case of sex preserves the status quo; "Yes" always introduces a whole raft of potentially life-changing circumstances each time, and kids, by definition, don't have enough life experience under their belts to make an informed decision about whether any of those potentials are a good idea for them at that moment, especially when their hormones may be screaming GOGOGOGOGOGOGOGO! I will say that your sentence about vintage underage porn misses the point - whether the child performer was of legal age when it was made is immaterial; the pedophile watching it now is contributing to a market for it now that puts children at risk for exploitation now when he gets tired to fapping to the old stuff and wants fresh material.

@KINGDIAMOND - Part of your question that doesn’t appear to have been addressed yet is what happens if you pick up a med-resistant strain of HIV from someone else when you’ve only been taking tour Triumeq on and off. Picking up a second strain is known as “superinfection” and is a very real risk, especially for those poz men not on medication who choose to bareback. Even for poz men on ART and neg men on PReP, the risk exist of bareback exposure to drug-resistant strains that may not be deterred by medication. The fact that you’re not taking your Triumeq on time doesn’t do anything about your chances of getting superinfected, except to ensure that you’ll have less defense against a wider array of strains. What it does do, however, is significantly increase the chance that you’ll develop a treatment-resistant strain all on your own. Every single day, my cell phone sounds an alarm to tell me to take my pill. I set that alarm three years ago on daily repeat. I haven’t missed a dose. You can do this, man.

@gwmxyz - Maybe, maybe not... Was he offering to whore you out? I would have given such a business offer my undivided attention.

Hypnosis is a widely misunderstood discipline. People are often impressed by stage hypnosis demonstrations in which participants are induced to cluck like chickens or do other outlandish and uncharacteristic things that might make you think that a skilled hypnotist could "program" another person's mind to make him or her do anything at all. While hypnosis can be a powerful influence over the suggestible conscious and subconscious mind, there are limits. One cannot, for instance, "hypnotize a person to death" by hypnotizing him to point a gun at his head and pull the trigger. The instinct for self-preservation proves too strong. It is, however, possible for a skilled hypnotist to cause a susceptible subject (not everyone is a good subject) to experience sensations that do not exist. As it happens, I am a particularly good hypnotic subject, and have been taken under by a handful of different "tists", as they say. Some of these men were ethical... some were not. I will address the unethical ones because a) the experiences are significant to the topic, and b ) the ethical ones are boring. Both unethical 'tists had an erotic motive that was known to me at the time we began, but what I had not been told was that both intended to quickly undermine my sense of self, self-control, self-determination, and self-worth by establishing an ego persona of their own as dominant within my psyche. The first of the two was more clumsy and less sophisticated; he simply had my ego (to use Freudian terms) lock my Superego away in a cell. Later, he would talk of murdering the prisoner as unnecessary. With my own mental controller absent, he was free to replace it with his own custom-made one, issue instructions, and do a lot of perusasive talking. Now note this: A lot of persuasive talking. Hypnotism is about suggestibility. Keep this in mind as we go. The second unethical 'tist also immediately began by drawing me down layer upon layer of progressively deeper falls into trance, stripping away layers of self until we arrived at the point at which he asked if we were at the layer where I had my defenses erected. When I said yes, he told me he swept them away, and he was now in control of that layer, and took me one layer deeper, and then began issuing instructions... and a lot of persuasive talking. Like the one before, the persuasive talking had a lot to do with building him up, making everything he said seem more and more reasonable, making all my thoughts seem more and more questionable. Then he began little demonstrations of how he could make me feel things by drawing upon my own memory of feelings, like wind, rain, sun, touch... a hand on my cock... my cock being stroked... the feeling of an orgasm... now what would that feel like ten times as hard? I could make you feel that a hundred times as hard... etc. Have you ever seen the Jim Henson movie Labyrinth, in which a young girl named Sara must find her way to the Goblin King's castle to take back the child that he has stolen? The pivotal point of the film [ s p o i l e r s ] occurs when Sara realizes that for all that he has put her through, for all the illusions, he has no actual power over her. That is the secret of the hypnotist. The power he leverages over your mind is its own. That second hypnotist had me spreadeagled, in shock, on my bed undergoing massive forced orgasm torture of my own making bound by manacles that existed only in my mind. I don't know how long I was in that condition, because at the peak of it, when he thought he had me fully captured and under his control - I overthrew him. Remember that level where I said I had my defenses up? Not entirely true. I'm not an idiot. I know that some 'tists are unethical motherfuckers, so I've spent a long time setting up a kind of firewall in my head. The place I allow 'tists to play is set aside for that purpose, and they don't go outside of it. This guy almost did, but when he hit the wall, I just collapsed the whole partition in on him and closed it down. God, he was furious (this was done over the phone) and he finally hung up and left me like that. Yeah, yeah, cool story bro, I know. the point is, a good hypnotists can get into your head and fuck around, and depending on what you're willing to allow yourself to be persuaded to do, you could end up doing self-destructive things for bad men. It depends on what your brain is willing to let you do. They have no actual power over you. Therefore, Slipperyott, even with the best hypnotist, you will have no actual power over your friend, especially if he is not under direct trance, to do something that he really, really doesn't want to do. Besides, setting someone up to risk getting a disease is a dick move, especially if it's your fantasy and not his (wtf?). And, forget the whole "when I snap my fingers you will remember nothing of what just happened" bullshit. He'll know what you tried to do, or he'll remember it eventually. Then he'll come for you with an icepick. Or he'll hire a hypnotist to make you believe you're a chicken. Either way, best not try.

@alwaysready - Angry? I was not angry when I wrote that reply - probably because I have hung around here long enough to understand the nature of the community that has generated the conversation. But if you seek to chide me for taking a challenging tone toward the Jerry Sandusky wannabes who publicly boast of their desire for carnal relations with children - yes, children - of 12, 13, 14 - then I have nothing but disdain for your rebuke. I have no sweet words for such men. I am an absolute defender of children.

I read through the first five pages, and then a sampling of the rest, with astonishment. First, Breedingzone is the last, the very, very last place anyone should consult on whether the age of consent for sexual activity should be lowered. The bias is inherent, and frankly, some of you phuks are unrepentantly pedophilic. I think I threw up in my mouth a little bit reading some of these responses. Second, just because a young person is aware of a fact does not - repeat, does not - mean he or she has the wisdom to know what to do about it. I'm a father of two college-age kids, son and daughter. I have been presented with evidence of this every day of their lives. At 21 and 18, they are still both sexual neophytes, but neither is a virgin. And may I say, in spite of my high regard for the members here and the fact that I place myself as a whore bottom among you, that had I encountered any of you worthy gentlemen messing with my son anywhere between the ages of 12 and 18, I would have cleared out your braincase without the slightest hesitation. It's a dad thing. Third, you nimrods, just because most of you are gay chatting away on a mostly gay site, does not mean that all these lads whose age of consent you're proposing to drop to 12 are only going to consent to other lads. And what happens when horny 12-year-old William knocks up 14-year-old Maggie during a consensual experiment? All good and legal - according to you, the kids were ready... bull. shit. Now there's a baby in the mix, and three lives are in the blender. Because some fucker with male pattern baldness and a paunch wants to diddle with boys. Fuck you sideways. Childhood has its place. Children need time to grow and mature, and be guided by caring adults, steered in their growth and experimentation, and protected from predators like some of you sad cases. My Mamaw married at 14. My Papaw wasn't a lot older. It was Not A Good Thing. This issue has to do with so very much more than sex that it's absurd to be discussing it on this forum.

Precisely. So when we hear these bottoms complaining, "There are never enough Tops" what they're actually complaining is, "There are never enough bespoke 25-year-old 9.5-inch long, 5.5-inch diameter Asian long-haired Tops named Kosuke with 0.5% body fat and deep emerald eyes that shine for me alone." And when we say, "Well, there's Joe over there... He's got a pretty hot nine incher," we get: "Ugh, no - He has hairy legs. And what is he, 27? OMG." "Okay, well what about Dimitri there, in the steamroom? That is righteous BBC, and he never plays without two of his friends." "Totally not my scene." "That's everybody's scene. What's the matter with you?" "Nope." "Well... Oh, hey! That guy who just came in looks like exactly what you're after!" "Are you kidding? Please. He's Korean." [And thus we draw the curtain on our hopeless bottom, who will remain unfucked, and unfulfilled, until in desperation he gives head to a homeless geezer in an alley at 4:30am.]

@muscmtl - You tell us you're surprised that you go to places like Recon and tell people they're frauds because they don't accept your attitude, and that you don't understand why people don't like it when you walk into their place and start slapping them around. It's because you admittedly don't know what you're talking about yet you have a whole raft of assumptions about how to behave. Now, you've been honest enough to say here what you don't know and what you don't understand, and I give you props for that, and for coming forward to ask your question so that you can understand. Let me try to help you by giving it to you straight up. Any time you talk about people causing or receiving pain in the context of sexual congress, you're in the realm of sadism and masochism - S&M. So whether you realize it or not, the slapping and spanking you're talking about wanting to do, however mild, is BDSM play, and frankly, pretty mild play at that*. The point is, there is no difference between what you're talking about doing and what you're calling "idiotic SM" except the question of degree. Aside from that, all the other rules apply. There is a whole world of people who can take and dish pain during sex the likes of which would bring most men here to tears. Needle through your testicles? Been there. Have the pics. Don't tell me it was idiotic; you weren't there, you wouldn't even have understood the scene. My former Master (a big, scary man) routinely submitted to baseball-bat beatings designed to cause deep-tissue bruising in his back and bring him to tears. Some men he worked on asked for nails to be driven through their foreskins. Spankings weren't done with the skin of the hand, they were done with paddles made to leave vivid weals. Most men and women who took a flogging didn't count it well-done unless there was bruising. That's the world I come from. That's the world you want to occupy, even if you don't realize it. Want to tell the BDSM world what you want to do and then tell them what they do is idiotic? They'll just call you a pussy. See, there is no place in the world in which you just get to go around hitting people until you cum. Sorry. Not that simple. Not even with sexual masochists. Masochists have a special psychological relationship to pain that isn't about you. You don't get to just walk into a hookup and start slapping because you get your kicks that way - that just marks you as a thug. You earn the right to apply pain by establishing a trust relationship with the submissive, who then gives you permission to do it, to the degree that the two of you have mutually agreed upon. And you don't go beyond his limits. If you do, you're the fraud. There are pain submissives out there who can take the kind of abuse you're talking about and wonder when you're going to start, because you're talking about pretty low-end play. You might even have a harder time finding serious masochists to take an interest in you, and discover that you have to deal with curious beginners - which would account for some of what you are calling "frauds". These are people who are still learning what their limits are. You're still learning what's acceptable in this sphere, so try to cut them a little slack. If you really want to understand what this is all about, go make yourself an account on FetLife and join some of the discussion groups there. It's a quick education. *Oh, and if what you're doing isn't play, and you're doing it without consent in order to actually harm and debase your sexual partners, then it's sexual abuse, and you're an asshole.

@ChainedBoy - I think the reason you’re getting a lot of pushback on this is that what you’re describing isn’t how the power dynamic actually works. When a bottom like you or me speaks of a Top’s “absolute right” to our asses, what we’re actually talking about is the sense that has been created by the power exchange. That’s what we get off on, and it seems as though what you’re objecting to is when a Top breaks the illusion - which seems like a breach of the power exchange agreement. In reality, the bottom is almost always the more powerful player in a Power Exchange; the bottom enables the scene by permitting the Top to take aggressive actions, on the bottom’s terms (whether it seems that way or not) that the Top would otherwise be constrained from doing by law or custom. When a Top gives a compliment after a scene, it is likely that he simply considers the power exchange completed sooner than you do, and is returning to the normal state of affairs in which you are on an equal footing with him (i.e., reality). It’s very difficult for two people to maintain the same fantasy state in sync for any length of time, and post-orgasmically, probably not realistic.

An acquaintance of mine in the trade told me that not a lot of tattooists would agree to do this kind of work. How do you go about locating an artist willing to do a tattoo around your anus or your cock?

Lately, I’ve been getting a lot of responses from Tops in which their first (and sometimes only) question is “How many loads have you got in you?” I always answer truthfully, and I’ve never gotten a negative reaction.

I chose the last option only because it seemed to imply ejaculation, and because it also seemed to be about when I would have an orgasm by choice. But in fact, I don't even much enjoy ejaculating, and when I'm being fucked, I have so many involuntary orgasms (anal, prostate) that I can't really answer a question as though I don't "cum". My former Master focused my training on forced orgasms to the point that he could make me have a full-body dry orgasm just by telling me, "Cum." (Unfortunately, he trained me so that anyone can command this, and it still works just fine. It's not as fun as you would think, especially after the first 20 times.) The result was that I'm multi-cum capable, and so sensitized to it that I cum all the fucking time while I'm being bred. My cock runs semen if the guy works my prostate, but I don't ejaculate as such. Oh, and then there are those bastard Tops (yeah, you know who you are, you sick motherfuckers) who love to tease an anus, and they force me to have one shuddering anal climax after another until I'm pleading for them to stop because I'm so sensitive to it and they don't realize what they're doing to me so they ignore me. So how important is it to me that I cum? Never. How often does a Top end up forcing me to cum anyway? Every. Single. Time. Over and over and ohmyfuckinggohhhhhhhhhh.........

A couple of weekends ago, I’m lying ass-up in a hotel room fielding responses from my BBRTS, A4A and CL ads, and I get a bite. ”I’m so glad to finally find someone on CL who isn’t going to flake,” he says. “I’ll be over as soon as I hear about a car. My mom has ours tonight.” [Uh-oh. And according to what he’s told me, he’s 30.] “The guy with the car didn’t come through I guess I can’t come” [Oh, what the hell, he’s like three minutes away; I offer to go get him for the sake of the fuck.] “I don’t know...I guess that could work...” [I pick him up.] “Would you mind stopping by my friend’s house? He picked up my epilepsy medication for me.” [Bloody hell. God only knows what he’s picking up. This is underscored when he gets back in the car and says, “Oh my God, that looked so bad, didn’t it, like a drug deal or something.” Shit. Don’t say anything, just drive back to the hotel, hope for a clean fuck, and drive him home.] Did that happen? No. By the time he got his shorts off he started having epileptic tremors and said, “I hate to ask, but could you take me home?” *sigh* After I got back, lubed myself back up and resumed the position, my very next email was from a young Top who asked only: “r u generous?” ~fume~ I informed him that I was the one offering the service here, that I had no trouble whatever getting bred frequently for free, and that the reason for this is that I am, in fact, very generous - with my ass. He did not accept my generous offer to try it for himself. About an hour later, I got a follow-up CL message from a guy who had expressed interest earlier in the evening. He said, “Can you call me an uber?” I came veeeery close to replying, “You’re an uber.” But it was time to head to the bathhouse, so I just said screw it, closed up shop and left for happier fucking grounds. What’s the most unreasonable - or just looniest - thing a guy has asked you for on a hookup? I can’t be the only one who gets these nutjobs...

Naked with the exception of my service collar and the -occasional- exception of white athletic socks if the Top desires and/or the room is frigid. At the bathhouse, the token towel is draped over my shoulder if I bother with it at all. This said, I almost never find myself in other public situations where sex is requested of me - I can only say that in those few cases I've always ended up pretty damn naked. And for some reason, I seem to attract Doms who want to cut all the clothes off of me so that I can't put them back on...

I think you're just making my point for me. It sounds as though you've worn yourself our trying to keep up with trends and you're just now realizing that the only way to live is to stick with who you actually are. Maybe for you, that time is only just starting. I'm a sub bottom with a long list of kink experience. I started late, but I've been at it for 15 solid years, never changing who I am for anybody. I never have to ask anyone to fuck me; I just put myself out there the way I am, and it happens. A lot. The rest of the male world could decide to dye their cocks green and I still wouldn't change the way I am. Frankly, trying to become something for somebody else is too damn much trouble. If one guy doesn't want my ass the way it is, another one will. You just can't make yourself crazy over the one that doesn't. That's the way of things.