Is it wrong for a bottom to use his top's dick for their own pleasure?

[backdoorjimmy]

I'm a 100% bottom and sometimes I feel like I'm using my boyfriend's dick instead of him using my hole. I love a nice long lay and sometimes I just climb on and use his cock the way I want. My favorite way to get laid is on my back with my legs on his shoulders. But sometimes I get so horny for it that I need to straddle him and ride it so that it presses harder against my spot until I orgasm.  

I keep reading all these threads about bottoms being used for their man's pleasure only, and I want to be a good bottom. I want to make sure my bf is taken care of and that he cums as much as he needs to. But sometimes I need to get my ass serviced and I can't help myself. Does this make me a selfish bottom? 

[Samanthads]

no good sex is always a 2 way thing and more so if with a partner 

[Guest descartes70817]

A good top knows that making his bottom squeal with pleasure means he will get more pleasure in return. I love it when I'm able to make a bottom cum just by fucking his boi hole..

[Guest STLjeffDadd]

Agreed. Nothing hotter than yur bottom cumming while he’s squeezing my seed deep into himself 

[tallslenderguy]

59 minutes ago, backdoorjimmy said:

I'm a 100% bottom and sometimes I feel like I'm using my boyfriend's dick instead of him using my hole. I love a nice long lay and sometimes I just climb on and use his cock the way I want. My favorite way to get laid is on my back with my legs on his shoulders. But sometimes I get so horny for it that I need to straddle him and ride it so that it presses harder against my spot until I orgasm.  

I keep reading all these threads about bottoms being used for their man's pleasure only, and I want to be a good bottom. I want to make sure my bf is taken care of and that he cums as much as he needs to. But sometimes I need to get my ass serviced and I can't help myself. Does this make me a selfish bottom? 

i don't personally think there is any one standard definition for Top or bottom, Dom or sub.  i think all Tops, bottoms, Dom's, subs, have things in common,  but that doesn't mean they're all the same.  To me, it's all about chemistry. i have a sub nature, i can trace it back to age 7.  But it's not cookie cutter, i'm an individual.  i questioned for awhile just how sub i am, because i didn't fit other's ideas of "sub."  Then i started meeting Dom guys who were an awesome fit, the Yang to my yin and i realized that variety is an awesome thing.  

Not all bottoms are "sub," not all Tops "Dom."  And there's probably an infinite number of variations and combinations of those.  i think the best relationships involve self knowledge and the ability to articulate... i.e., communication.  To me, relationship is all about connecting, as deeply and completely as possible. To that end, i'd suggest you talk to your boyfriend. Tell Him what you are telling us, how much you want to make sure he "...is taken care of and that He cums as much as He needs to."  You might discover that He loves how much you love and need His cock. i'm convinced communication is key... i can't count the number of times i've been wrong when i tried to mind read, but it's funny how often we expect to be able to or our partner thinks we should 'just know.' ❤️

[ErosWired]

That’s a difficult question. For two men in a relationship, like the OP and his boyfriend, I would agree with @Samanthads above.

For myself, though, I was trained to find my fulfillment in sex through the satisfaction of the Top. To use a Top’s cock to achieve a personal orgasm would be misdirected for me, if I could even cum from it at all. What’s more, it would feel shaming, like I was so selfishly desperate for a Top’s attention that I would try to use one who didn’t actively want to fuck me. That’s not to say that I never find myself in heat and strongly in need of breeding - that happens all the time, and there’s often nothing I can do about it other than unsatisfyingly rape myself with a dildo. 

Note that I keep qualifying all this with “for me” because I know my sexuality is fucked and I’m not representative of most bottoms. I can only say that in my particular case, if it came to using a Top’s cock just to pleasure myself, it would feel wrong to even try.

[HardOneLA]

It never starts off about "me" as the bottom; it's always about finding a cock to service, pleasure and please.   But once I've been mounted everything inside me changes and I feel so fulfilled, so satiated, and so realizing my purpose.  As I have those feelings it empowers the top to fuck harder, better, and stronger knowing we're both on the same track to breeding.

[Ozpig]

My tops' cocks is always for my pleasure just as my holes are there for his

 

[NLbear]

You're not selfish. Every gay guy has needs be it top, bottom or vers. Tops can use my hole for their pleasure, I use their cock for mine. And it's great when those two needs come together in the same session 😉 

[DarkroomTaker]

28 minutes ago, NLbear said:

You're not selfish. Every gay guy has needs be it top, bottom or vers. Tops can use my hole for their pleasure, I use their cock for mine. And it's great when those two needs come together in the same session 😉 

Exactly......All for one and One for all 😛

[rawsatyr]

Allow me to give you a longer response. Could be like fiction for some to read but it's reality for me!    Skip this if you are in a hurry!

   I strongly advocate for 'pro-active' assertive and preferably masculine POWER-BOTTOMS! Guys who keep in shape, talk like dudes and don't whine about their 'ass-needs' but who actively, charmingly and seductively know how to press a random top's buttons. Guys who don't get clingy but just like a prowling top TAKE CHARGE and celebrate promiscuity. It turns me on when a guy presents his elongated fuck-slit, a feature which is OBVIOUS proof of his cum-dumpster champ-status!

    Gay LIBERATION didn't come to us so some self-perceived BETTER-gays and entitled jerks can trip out on UEBER-CHAUVINIST head-trips, delegating all bottoms to 'worthless holes'... sure the 'fantasy' can be played out during verbal dirty sex-talk (I guess) just like some guys do occasionally, 'going along with it' during inter-racial sex. You know, using N-word, racist language nastier than the KKK or how they do in ROOTS. But for the most part, it's TIME OUT for me then and I have to FAKE enthusiasm so as to not spoil a perfectly good hard-on and insemination...

    I myself as a former, conventional monogamist who rode the  'mostly-top-ticket', I quickly tired of lazy bottoms. And if some random buck suggested he wanted to fuck me, I would run! No I wanted to be in control, and only top without a rubber. Because WITH a rubber I lost my hard-on! But I got tired of stereotypical bottoms who just lay back like cheap blow-up dolls and at best give you the verbal, whimpering feed-back of a FEMBOT Or the annoying wailing of Latin nelly-boy Armand Rizzo, who despite OBVIOUSLY-taking huge cock again and again 'professionally' still makes a racket like an abused woman, reluctantly taking pipe from her selfish, abusive husband. And even though Armand has a big cock when he DOES top, as a 95% bottom all you see is a shriveled, clit-like ant-eater. That feminine cliche may inspire and turn on those guys obsessed with their own 'superior masculinity'. But it's a two-way street the 'choosing a aside': those who see themselves as 'entitled alphas' who want 'lesser males' to clean off their post-ciotus shitty dicks' . You know, by those who CHOSE to be 'worthless faggots' and who consigned themselves to a BITCH-SLAVE  existence 'born to be JUST A HOLE'. 

    Am I alone here when I say: When I top a dude I prefer to see his face, a fiendish smirk and a raging lollipop hard-on dripping precum from his dimpled piss-slit in anticipation of being bred!!!! One who carries himself like a dude, who talks like a dude and who smirks as he says: "Gotta run! But Thanks for nutting in my ass, bro!" 

    After my 'conversion' I have accepted new rules! Promiscuity rules, versatility is hot! All 'traditional, conventional' role play went out the window!  I pride myself of having seduced tops to bottom for me, and to have taken the cock of sexy bottoms who rarely top. When I ride a thick cock, the can-sized variety like Rocco Steele, I use spit and slip down balls-deep without flinching! At least that is my trademark MO! Hell I had my nipples pierced without flinching or making a sound! And I will ride a cock like LUCIFER (spell-check turned this into Sarah Palin)  himself or the more appropriate role models of mine, the seductive SATYRS of legends.

    I remember when I would go out and meet other TOPS (the more simple-minded kind) and we'd exchange competitive static and keep distance. Them circling the same 'prey' I would... the total BOTTOMS would be taken in for a night of breeding, rutted and seeded, tagged and slam-dunked and then discarded like chicken-bones, predictably because they rarely were very interesting or lacked an exciting personality.

    The HOT ONES always turned out to be the versatile PLAYERS who are opportunistic catchers and pitchers depending on the game, and 'popular sluts' and who scored a lot. We are all attracted to bad boys, at least in the bareback/poz sub-culture... I even coach my man of how to 'hook' new players, take loads, and occasionally breed new players! Regulars don't even count, only new conquests!

    I myself as a 'reformed, serial monogamist top' have taken the pledge to take all raw cock with the conviction and relish of a dark angel. No pulling out, no loads refused, no regrets and no shame! In some ways I feel like it's penance for having been a 'putz', compensation for having been a judgmental cunt, catching up with the scores of the bros, acceptance of being a risk-taking slut! Absorbing 'sketchy', anon and potentially DANGEROUS cock and seed; and I feel a rush FOR HOURS afterwards, the sensation of doing 'rolls' at a circuit party, knowing I'm holding on to random cum to full absorption!!! Like a true slut! ! Instead of being a traditional bore, I will hopefully put on an entertaining show ( and hopefully with witnesses watching us)  whether I top or bottom (hopefully avoiding any porn cliches)! I'm intend on GETTING A FUN REPUTATION! I want other promiscuous guys to say: "Yeah, he is one of us and he is a damn good fuck! And he plays well with others, let's invite him to the orgy!" 

   My biggest fantasy is to entice the most popular, athletic cum-dumpster at a sex-party, one who has taken loads from a whole rat-pack of fans. Entice him with the right 'bro-moves' to accept me as a challenge and suddenly TURN TABLES. Getting a boner to want to fuck me, using the dripping DNA from his fuck-hole for lube to rut and inseminate me! That would be so hot, so sleazy and over-the-top! Total promiscuity and cross-pollination! Versatile sharing of the 'legacy' of a whole tribe of poz-bros for all to witness! Total redemption for all the hang-ups!

Edited June 10, 2019 by rawsatyr
intro sentence and a weird Sarah Palin correction in spell-check

[PissPigBrooklyn]

What else would he use it for?  The idea that a bottom is divorced from any kind of pleasure is archaic, a bit homophobic and unfair to both the bottom and top. It may work in a master/slave relationship but even there the "slave" should be deriving pleasure from the way he is being used. My hole gets a lot of pleasure when a top's raw dick enters it and pounds it. When we work it together it is better for each of us. A top has an ego too that needs satisfying and often that involves knowing that he is pleasuring his bottom. To consider one"s self just a hole that is there as a receptacle for the top may be fine in some instances but it may actually be in other cases cheating the top for the bottom's psychological pleasure which he gets by withholding his responses.

[PG1961Canada]

Because I'm versatile, I have learned to make the best out of being the top OR the bottom.  And it turns ME on to please the guy I am with... so that's what I look for when fucking.

When I'm topping a hot hole, I watch the bottom's face to see which spots my cock cause 'twitching' or 'moaning'. With that knowledge, I proceed to fuck his ass off and hitting all those magic spots makes him trash around more on my cock and we both end up having a great cum.... The bottom typically knows what is going on and relaxes and starts to really enjoy the fuck.  In fact, I enjoy a somewhat mouthy, aggressive bottom who likes dirty talk and working his hole on my dick.  It turns my crank.

When I'm bottoming, I watch the top's face as I move my ass around and encourage him into my second ring.  I open my hole to let him ease in fast, and squeeze his cock as he pulls back to the edge.  At the same time, I have been known to push a lover back, suck his cock and get him hard and juicy and slide down on his cock and ride it while looking right at him.  Using his cock as a hard warm piece of flesh deep in my ass, rubbing against my prostate on MY terms.  Depending on who it is, they will sometimes lie back and let me work my hole and blow my load and let me milk a load from them.  Some let me satisfy my 'itch' for a while, then grab me and flip me over and pound into me doggy, slapping my ass and taking it up a notch.... which in turn, cranks me up a notch.

So - a lot of it will depend on your partner and your mutual style.  I have a long term FWB who every now and then comes in, we share a smoke and then he pulls my shorts done, bends me over the kitchen counter and pounds a quick load into me..... take my breath away and is VERY hot.  He tells me how he is going to load me up all night and just 'takes' my ass... it turns us both on.  Round two, he eats his load from my hole under the rim chair and then gives me a nice slow, deep fuck.  I tell him I want to feel his cockhead up inside me.  He flexes it.  I push my hole back on his cock from different angles and thrusts.  It catches him off guard and he knows I am using his cock now for my satisfaction.   I have blown many loads from his cock just slow pumping and grinding my hole.  And he loves unloading right at the opening to my hole just as much as when I push back on him as he is cumming and he unloads deep up into my guts.  That's one reason we're long time FWB's... we change it up.   I do the same to him.  He has a firm hairy ass.  It drives him nuts when I tease him by slapping my cock on his hole and spanking his firm cheeks.  When he's had enough, he just impales himself on my cock and rides for a while.  I love watching him use my cock for his own pleasure.

IMO there is a difference between a sub/dom fuck and a top/bottom fuck.  They can be different - or the same. With certain FWB's I am a more aggressive bottom - because it brings something out in them... the top is shy but loves to top.  I'm the aggressor.  We BOTH have fun tho!  And I have a couple of FWB's who are younger guys and we role play them being the aggressive top who wants to fuck an older guy who enjoys a good hard fuck and cum.  That is another role play that works.

Lots of options... but I would never feel guilty of wanting to just USE a top every now and then.  Just find the guy that is in the mood for that... that day! Grin.

 

[ronnie4u]

Do not seem it is wrong - my is Pleasure / Obeying to service without charging for money or gifts !   

[find91]

As long as both parties are in agreement who am I to judge. Personal I can't be a service top I find it too degrading and I hate bossy bottoms but that is just me. I have met and chatted with service top, they can be very cool people very orientedvin giving the bottom pleasure.