Started on Descovy 2 weeks ago

[Guest]

A few weeks ago, my partner tested poz. A day later, surprisingly, I tested neg. I can only attribute this to the fact that his initial viral load was only ~30,000 instead of in the millions. Well, these few weeks have been filled with emotion. Over the course of one night, I had suddenly become more educated in a disease I had never thought I would have anything to do with in my life.

I was concerned that Truvada would impair my renal function as I have had kidney problems in the past. Fortunately, I learned of Descovy, a Truvada alternative that got approved in the US for PrEP usage in October this year. My doctor suggested I go on PrEP because of my high risk, and he did not even realize it had been approved at that time, so I guess it's good that I did my research.

So far, I have had no discernible side effects except nausea in the mornings, which has been fading over time. Right now, my largest concern is that my partner and I are now serodiscordant and there now seems to be a divide between us (not least of which is how he got converted in the first place, via infidelity). I will try to give updates if I can remember this post I made!

[drscorpio]

My guess is most of the issue is the cheating that got him pozzed and the subsequent close call you had for staying neg. You have the transmission issue handled. 

[Guest]

On 11/5/2019 at 11:45 PM, drscorpio said:

My guess is most of the issue is the cheating that got him pozzed and the subsequent close call you had for staying neg. You have the transmission issue handled. 

Just a quick update, and because I forgot to mention - we had sex 2-3 days before we got tested. I'm not sure how quickly the most up-to-date HIV test can detect HIV in the body, but I know I'm still in the window where HIV test results can appear negative. If I do turn out poz, my doctor has said that I can quickly switch to Biktarvy before the virus in my body becomes resistant.

On the other hand, I have been getting flu symptoms for the past 2 days, and they don't seem to show signs of letting up. I've been getting massive headaches, fever, chills, digestive problems, and my groin feels pretty swollen. I hope it's not a seroconversion, but I can't help but fear that it might be. I hope they go away soon and that it's just a flu that somehow got past my flu shot that I got earlier this month.

FYI, my partner and I are still together despite what he did. We've been through too much together and he has expressed guilt over being pozzed from some passionless affairs. If I am poz, then it will be just one more thing that brings me closer to him. However, being in a state of limbo and not knowing for sure gives me a lot of anxiety at the moment.

Edited November 7, 2019 by deadalous

[drscorpio]

I am glad to hear you are still together. You both need support right now. 

[PG1961Canada]

This happened to my partner and I. 

I agree with @drscorpio.... if you have the means... get some counselling....  

We were fortunate that the SIS clinic where he started treatment offered counselling to each of us separately - and couples counselling.   

It helped.  Just a thought!!  Good luck

[LKMike]

Hi Deadalous, was just wondering what happened.  Did you seroconvert? Did you guys work things out? I hope you are doing well.

[tallslenderguy]

On 11/7/2019 at 8:42 AM, deadalous said:

 

FYI, my partner and I are still together despite what he did. We've been through too much together and he has expressed guilt over being pozzed from some passionless affairs. If I am poz, then it will be just one more thing that brings me closer to him. However, being in a state of limbo and not knowing for sure gives me a lot of anxiety at the moment.

i applaud you for not just jumping ship. For me, one of the big advantages of being gay has been it has taught me (sort of forced initially) to question the/my status quo.  We grow up in the culture we were born into and are programed by it with all sorts of ideas, notions, rules and regulations on how stuff should be, in this case, relationship.  

Once we get into relationship, however, we soon discover that our ideas of how it's gonna be or 'should' be are different from reality.  You obviously recognize and acknowledge that you have something with this person that you deem worthy of preserving. Yay you!! i consider that a sign of maturity, no matter how things eventually work out.  

Infidelity, and the lying and cheating that usually accompanies it, hurts.  So often, the pain of it forces people apart. But it can also present an opportunity to look deeper into ourselves and our relationship, to ask questions about why and how.  To me, one of the primary positives of a dedicated ltr is the opportunities it gives us to open up and be vulnerable with another person, and thereby connect and bond with them.  

best to you.