Discussion on Racism and Fetishizing from Spun BBC Worship

[AlB]

On 8/29/2023 at 1:54 PM, ellentonboy said:

Moderator's Note: This discussion was begun in response to a story in ChemSex Stories. If you are interested in reading the story, you can find it here. 

I wonder if any of our black members are offended by threads that mention race In particular🙄? I sure hope not...

Is it fetish when a white guy prefers BBC?  Is it racist if a white guy prefers only white men?  I can honestly say that I don’t have a racist bone in my body; certainly not my boneR!  But I have preferences and looks/types that appeal more than others.  Don’t we all?

[partying.hard]

3 minutes ago, AlB said:

Is it fetish when a white guy prefers BBC?  Is it racist if a white guy prefers only white men?  I can honestly say that I don’t have a racist bone in my body; certainly not my boneR!  But I have preferences and looks/types that appeal more than others.  Don’t we all?

Of course, we all do. I certainly do.  But I’ve been called very unkind names because of my preferences.  

[BlackDude]

Apologies, I forgot number 6:

 

6. Some of these men are only offended by BBC, because in their mind they see it as someone having a desirable trait they don’t have. They don’t give a damn about the humanity of black men. These are folks who have been pedestalized their entire lives, have over inflated egos, and like the narcissists they are, it’s illogical anyone would prefer something other than what they are offering. 

[BlackDude]

9 minutes ago, AlB said:

Is it fetish when a white guy prefers BBC?  Is it racist if a white guy prefers only white men?  I can honestly say that I don’t have a racist bone in my body; certainly not my boneR!  But I have preferences and looks/types that appeal more than others.  Don’t we all?

I don’t think that makes you racist. 

[KindaBasic]

On 9/1/2023 at 10:23 AM, tallslenderguy said:

i've often wondered about bias and stereotyping in the gay community.

 

Sometimes our need for all these genres and sub-genres gets to be a bit much. A few years back, I dated an Asian American, and suddenly I was a rice queen. When I had a few extra pounds, i was called a bear or chub. Now I’m a daddy. Being gay is like reliving high school where we were divided into jocks, stoners, geeks, brains, etc. 

[Trainingwheels]

On 7/2/2024 at 10:29 PM, KindaBasic said:

Sometimes our need for all these genres and sub-genres gets to be a bit much. A few years back, I dated an Asian American, and suddenly I was a rice queen. When I had a few extra pounds, i was called a bear or chub. Now I’m a daddy. Being gay is like reliving high school where we were divided into jocks, stoners, geeks, brains, etc. 

“Dear Mr. Vernon,

We accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention for whatever it was we did wrong, but we think you’re crazy to make us write an essay telling you who we think we are. You see us as you want to see us — in the simplest terms and the most convenient definitions. But what we found out is that each one of us is a brain and an athlete, and a basket case, a princess, and a criminal.

Does that answer your question?

Sincerely yours,

The Breakfast Club”

😉

[KindaBasic]

6 minutes ago, Trainingwheels said:

“Dear Mr. Vernon,

We accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention for whatever it was we did wrong, but we think you’re crazy to make us write an essay telling you who we think we are. You see us as you want to see us — in the simplest terms and the most convenient definitions. But what we found out is that each one of us is a brain and an athlete, and a basket case, a princess, and a criminal.

Does that answer your question?

Sincerely yours,

The Breakfast Club”

😉

But being gat, it would probably be The Brunch Club. 

[Webster9]

On 8/29/2023 at 2:12 PM, partying.hard said:

In this group, there are lots on pigs into BBC.  And any BBC in this group is going to be happy to have their dick worshiped.

All I know is that, when I'm kicking back in a sling, and I see a black man headed my way,  I get very excited.  I don't know why.  I can't explain it.  It just is.

[topblkmale]

20 hours ago, Webster9 said:

All I know is that, when I'm kicking back in a sling, and I see a black man headed my way,  I get very excited.  I don't know why.  I can't explain it.  It just is.

 

Jungle Fever

Take two black dicks on an empty stomach and call me in the morning.

 

[hntnhole]

Sounds like Doctor topblkmale is a first-rate internist to ME !!!

[DCWildBtm]

Just catching up on this topic, and I have a question for you, @BlackDude, is your point #3 directed at me? If yes, please read on, if not, then please disregard. I'm going to continue writing, because to me it's clear who you were directing #3 at, and it's me. 

On 7/2/2024 at 5:15 PM, BlackDude said:

3. Why is it every time an issue of anti-black racism comes up, some other “minority” has to come up and throw us off the stage? Any other time these groups openly participate in the racists attitudes and activities, but as soon as the certain white guys don’t want them, it’s racist. When we talk about racism, we talk about justice in inequality. When many of these people talk racism, they mean access. 

And, before I dive into why I think it is about my post in this thread, let me preface it by saying that I don't hate you and although I haven't read everything you've posted on here I find it hard to believe that if I were that it would leave me "hating" you. I hope that people aren't "hating" in these forum, and I hope that you (or any of us) haven't been the victim of such. I'm bringing this up because:

On 7/2/2024 at 5:15 PM, BlackDude said:

I’m going to make myself more hated in here, but here’s my two cents on everything I read: 

 

The reason I think your comment 3 was about me [please note that unless the person who submitted his comment to this forum identified his racial/ethnic background like I and a few others did, or it's apparent due to their username (like yours, BlackDude) or profile pic, etc., I have no idea the race of anyone who has submitted comments]:

• Although my post wasn't the first, or even the 2nd to mention a racial group outside of black or white, I was the first to identify as a non-black or non-white person, and I discussed my Asian ethnic background and shared my experience as having lived as an gay Asian man.

If I'm not mistaken, all of the posts prior to mine in this forum were submitted by black or white guys. Therefore, I am the "some other minority" in your statement.

I don't really think my comments need further explanation, but I'll make a couple of key points that I hoped would convey:

1. They were in direct response to another user's views about Asian men. I quoted that user's statement in my response. 
2. My comments mostly focused on my lived experiences and my personal viewpoints. At no point in my comment do I claim to be speaking for anyone other than myself. I'm certainly not trying to speak for all Asians on this forum or anywhere for that matter. In fact, I write, "I only speak for myself," 
3. At the end of my comments, obviously not so successfully as gleaned from your comment @BlackDude, I attempt to pull away from the Asian-specific nature of my preceding remarks and bring things forward by discussing race issues in broader terms. 

Now, whether your item 3 is directed at me or not, please let me comment on a few things (but know that most of this is coming from the belief that your #3 was directed at me):

• First, thank you. When I first read your comment #3, I was absolutely floored, because at no point while I was writing what I wrote, reading others' comments, thinking through issues presented in this forum, or rereading my submission would I have thought that someone would have gotten from it what you did, as expressed in your comment #3. It's a perfect lesson for me in that no matter how open-minded I think I'm being, it's not enough. You presented me with a very different interpretation of my words than what I thought I had presented, and differing viewpoints are good things. 
• Second, another thank you. You thought my comment was so good that it threw off the entire conversation to be no longer about black people, that it thew "us [black people] off the stage." To this day, I don't really see that, but I respect your viewpoint and I am taking it as a complement in that it was so persuasive.
• Although I believe I was the first non-black or non-white person to comment in the forum, I was not the guy who introduced "some other 'minority'" into the discussion. In fact, I wasn't even the first to respond to that user's initial comment. It was only after that first guy who mentioned "Asian" wrote his follow-up that I knew for a fact wasn't true as based upon my own lived experience that I chose to comment. So, by my calculation, I was the 3rd individual with the 4th post that mentions another racial ethnic group. 
  • To me, that's pretty darned unfair to be "blamed" for attempting to divert the conversation when I was the 4th post by the 3rd poster that evoked another race other than black or white. 
• Let me be clear, I was not trying to steer the focus of the conversation away from where it had been or where it was going.
  • The fact that there are two more pages of comments after mine is just one example of that.
  • Another example of this is that there are only a couple more posts in those 2 pages that mention another "minority" and only one comment by another self-identified Asian member, and that comment is about wanting to be someone's friend. 
• Other than at the very end of my comment where I evoke "Avenue Q", I do not accuse any commenter in the forum as being racist.
• I am confused by your second sentence in comment #3, which was, "Any other time these groups openly participate in the racists attitudes and activities, but as soon as the certain white guys don’t want them, it’s racist." I don't think you're directly accusing me of openly participating with a racist attitude or in racist activities, but please correct me if I'm wrong here, you're accusing racial/ethnic groups to which I happen to belong of these attitudes and activities. 
  • I've read and re-read this sentence many times. Going purely by the words you wrote and my grasp of the English language (however loose that grasp may be), I think what you're trying to say is that Asian guys have racist attitudes and sometimes these attitudes manifest into racist actions. I'm inferring that you mean these actions and attitudes are against black people. However, your comment continues by essentially saying that only after an Asian person is rejected by a certain subset of  white guys will that Asian person see the light and come to view the the aforementioned attitudes and activities as in fact racist. 
  • If that's what you were going for, then I'm going to ask you to please reread what I wrote. You surprised me before with your interpretation of what I wrote (see above) but I just do not see how what I wrote brought you to thinking this. 

This post is already WAY TOO LONG, so I'm going to summarize my comments related to your last two sentences of comment #3: Racism is about justice. It's also about inequality. But you know what? It's also about access. It's about access to quality education, and healthcare. It's about access to safe places to live and access to communities (however you choose to define community). It's about access to good-paying jobs and access to reliable transportation to get to that job and anywhere else you may need or want to go. It's about access to media produced for the masses that doesn't conjure up the most negative of stereotypes of a demographic. Racism is about many, many things. Your comment leads the reader to believe that someone fighting for "access" is less noble or less right than someone fighting for justice or against inequality. I believe something different. I believe that access is critical, and that access could be a part of the mix to right past wrongs. 

There's so much more to say in light of your comment #3, but I'll end with another  reminder to you @BlackDude, no hate here. I respect your comments and views. I've never met you. How could I hate you? And heck if #3 wasn't directed at me at all then hopefully this will give you and everyone a good laugh 🙂 (if anyone made it this far). 

 

[Leather-lee]

On 7/2/2024 at 10:15 PM, BlackDude said:

I’m going to make myself more hated in here, but here’s my two cents on everything I read: 

1. As black people, we have to stop asking people to see the humanity in us. Either they don or they don’t. We’ve been trying for 500 years, and no plea or argument is going to get them to see the light. They see you as an object. Period. 
 

2. Some black  men, right or wrong, understand point 1, And play into the game. They know most white guys just want the dick, and give them what they want. They see it as transactional, as a lot of white men see interracial sex. 
 

3. Why is it every time an issue of anti-black racism comes up, some other “minority” has to come up and throw us off the stage? Any other time these groups openly participate in the racists attitudes and activities, but as soon as the certain white guys don’t want them, it’s racist. When we talk about racism, we talk about justice in inequality. When many of these people talk racism, they mean access. 
 

4. Black people, particularly in the gay community, need to get some self esteem and stop worshipping other cultures. Until we do that, there will continue to be a pecking order with white mean in top, “POC” second, and black men last.

5. You can take the youngest, cutest fittest black jock and he will be perceived to have equal desirability to 9/10 average white men. Only having a “BBC” will balance the scales. 
 

5. Dirty secret:  Most black men hate each other. That’s why they accept objectification, even if it bothers them. The thought of having to cut off white friends or have black people in their circle repulses them. 
 

Now of course some people are gonna say “not all,” but I’m just speaking in generalities as most people do. 

Agree with point 1 and 4.

Seriously disagree with point 5. Perhaps with the black men you know in the U.S?

[Leather-lee]

On 7/2/2024 at 10:57 PM, partying.hard said:

Of course, we all do. I certainly do.  But I’ve been called very unkind names because of my preferences.  

We all have our preferences - and that's fine.

You've stated on a few threads started by guys discussing their preference for black men, that you're not in 'BBC' or black guys. I really question why anyone needs to declare that on such a thread?

You're a hung white dude who probably gets any amount of action he wants, let some guys sound off without having to insert your 'preference' into the conversation.