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tallslenderguy

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Everything posted by tallslenderguy

  1. a little more i have a Latino FB i write about often in the "...last load" thread. He's been breeding me for 3 years. He's also Bi and has a gf. To me, as a Bi guy, there are things He needs/wants that i cannot give Him. i really like this Guy, so i want Him to be happy and fulfilled. He has also come to realize, have a certain sense, of how much i love and appreciate Him planting His seed in me. It's not 'just seed,' It's His "seed." To me, there's more than the physical seed, there is a lot of desire and intent behind what He is doing. For me psychologically, each time He breeds me with desire and intent, He puts more of Himself inside of me. For me it feels like i have this space inside of me that only a Man can fill, and He is filling and occupying that space. Going back to the "time share" analogy, a Man can occupy that space for as many days in the year as He wants, and while He is 'living' there, His stuff, scent, etc., are there as well. It's different when He is not there, or leaves for a long while. The space is still there and needs to be occupied. Another analogy (for me) could be food. One meal does not sustain forever, and one fuck and breeding doesn't either. For me, 'good nutrition' sexually is both physical and psychological. i think generally more pay attention to the physical, which i think is why we need/want it more often. i have found for myself, when the psychological part of breeding is more present, my physical need is not as demanding. It's complex and wonderful. i wish more Guys/guys (on the whole spectrum) were as intent on understanding and pursuing mind fuck/breeding as much as physical fuck/breeding.
  2. i confess to liking a certain angle to a "territorial" Top. i love His desire and perception that He is possessing and/or marking His territory when He breeds me. The flip side of that is we all are individuals and our need and capacity can be fluid. A lot of time, a bottoms need/desire/capacity for seed is going to be greater than one Tops ability to provide. Part of 'ownership' involves taking care of and maintaining Your property. i've found piss can be a different kind of seed that can supplement, and even enhance the feeling of being marked/possessed when the chemistry is there. As long as the desire/need is present between us, i.e., fucking is not just routine, or worse, obligatory- like it often gets in mono relationships, then the more a Man breeds me, the more addicted to Him i become and the more possessed i feel. But possession doesn't have to be exclusive, i think a time share (for both Tops and bottoms) makes more sense.
  3. i had not had under the stall sex in a long time... years. i would, but no of none around where i live, so it's been 20 years? i'm in Palm Springs and a Guy on Squirt sends me a note asking if i'm into "public sex." I responded: "i'm not shy, what do you have in mind," thinking He was exhibitionist and wanted to Cock me in front of others... hey, i'm a port for a storm. He explains He is in a restroom at Lowes and says it's "busy." i ask: "busy with sex or otherwise." He answers: "sex." And i respond: "on my way." When i get there, all 5 stalls are occupied, with a mix. But memory and rr etiquette kick in and i wait and the stall that opens is the best one. No GH, or even peep holes though. The Guy messages me and turns out He is in the stall next to me. As is usual in RR sex, we wait to make sure it's safe, which usually means others are very obviously there for sex, or you wait till others using the facility are gone. Finally, we are alone and He slides His legs and flaccid Cock under the stall, and i'm instantly on Him. i only have shorts and flip flops on, no underwear, so i'm easy access. but those are off as i suck Him. We get about 30 seconds of that before the RR door creaks open and we both retreat innocently. And, the RR fills back up. So, He invited me into His stall and i hesitated for about a micro second and joined Him. He got up on the toilet so there'd only be my feet in the stall, spread His legs and presented His Cock. Fuck Yeah, i went down on Him and He got hard very fast. God, it was good, our mutual lust was palpable. He held me on His cock and gagged me a few times, then wanted to fuck. So i turned around and presented my hole to Him, and after some awkward adjustments, He was in. In that position, He could not actually fuck, but it didn't matter because i'm pretty sure He came instantly as soon as He slid in. I don't think He was in much more than a minute or so. When He withdrew, i turned around and saw a drop of cum on His Cock and my mouth went right to it, and a reach around and my finger found a very creamy hole. We both looked at each other and silently mouthed: "Fuck Yeah!" i left, it was a sweet experience... but then, mutual sex always is for me.
  4. While i answered "no" to all three questions, getting to that place was a process of sorts for me. From lots of introspection and experience, i've learned that the most vital part of sex for me is connecting and meeting mutual need/desire. That can only happen if those involved are willing and able to be open and vulnerable. But i think we live in a social setting where 'faking it' is often the standard, so much so that i think it happens unconsciously a lot of the time. Yeah, i'm talking about more than orgasms and sex sounds here, but i think they have the same roots. Dating myself here, but remember the Canon advert several years ago where he declares: "Image is everything"? Of course, it was a play on words, selling a camera, but the meme was borrowed for that purpose. It seems part of our cultural conditioning to put forth, not our best 'real' foot, but to project an image that is constructed to get a particular response, and again, i think this is often done automatically and unconsciously. i believe, when we do this, we are part of and participating in a grand illusion. i think a common thread, that runs through all of humanity, is the need to be wanted, loved. But to get that requires being seen, known, which is vulnerable. As an aside, i have wondered if our drive for frequent hook-ups is a sort of mechanism we use to get affirmation, to be acknowledged and desired, using an appetite/hunger most of us have? That we've quantified our need/desire to be loved/wanted down to 'a load' or 'a hole?' As i see it, If we 'fake' who and how we are, the real us becomes invisible and we are not truly connecting what is there, but an image, a projection of what we hope may get a response we want/need. But then, the response is not to the real us, so it cannot feed that real us, it only affirms the false image.
  5. i'm in Palm Springs for a few days. Guy contacted me on Squirt, he was in a restroom at a Lowes, said it was "busy." Haven't done RR in a long time, but... muscle memory? i ended up going and all 5 stalls were full, some doing business, others looking for sex. We ended up in a stall next to each other and in a lull He slid under and i sucked Him a few before someone else entered the restroom and we both retreated. He invited me into His stall, and hormones being what they are, i went. He got up on the toilet so there'd only be two feet in the stall, spread His legs and offered His Cock and i sucked some more. He got hard pretty fast and wanted to fuck me... which is what i always want, so i turned around and positioned for Him to slide in. It was an awkward position for both of us and He had a hard time getting in at first, but we both prevailed, He came as soon as He got in. There was not really any fucking, He just penetrated me and came, and i did not know until He withdrew and i turned around and He said: "fuck yeah!!" and i saw a drop of cum on His cock, which i immediately suck off. A quick check of my hole and i had a nice creamy load. He was happy, so was i. i thanked Him for His cock and seed and left.
  6. While general terms like "Dom" and "sub" help us communicate a direction, they are too broad and undefined in their unpacked form. Personally, i do not see any relationship working, or approaching being a "relationship," without communication. As i see it, the D/s dynamic is about connecting needs/desire from two opposite poles. Spend any amount of time with BDSM folk, and you'll see very quickly that there are myriad expressions of both Dominance and submission. You may connect to stuff like ropes and whips, he may want to dress like a French maid and clean your house. You may perceive him as having an asshole and cock to be caged, and he may see himself as having a clit and a pussy. The list is as endless as are people... individuals. Again, just my views here, but i believe until the two of you communicate about how you each perceive and experience Dom/sub, you won't know where your needs/desires aline and the relationship will be generic at best.
  7. i processed out of a religious mindset, growing up in an era fraught with negative notions and labels about gay sex. As i am now, i have no negative connotations when i think of men having sex together, be they Top, bottom, or anywhere else on the sexual spectrum Like others have noted, i believe such pejoratives are a social construct, not a description of reality. So, re the question of "What kind of Man/man?" Some of the terms i use to describe how i see a Man Who wants/needs to penetrate another are: creative, controlling, possessing, conquering. i think of a bottom as men who want/need to be a canvass of sorts, or clay as a receiver of a Mans creative energy, wanting/needing to be controlled, possessed, conquered. That's by no means an exhaustive list of descriptors for me, but they all stem from a belief that nature expresses and functions in a yin/Yang sort of way. From the tiniest ions, there are protons, electrons and neutrons, which-depending on chemistry- attract (fuck?) and bond. To me, sex can be a simple or infinitely complex expression of what is. i'm endlessly grateful for the natural gift of expression and connection we have as part of living.
  8. For me, it depend on the Guy doing the fingering. i don't think there is any substitute for a Raw Cock, but as foreplay or part of fucking, fingering can be really hot... or not. Again, it depends on the Guy attached to the fingers. Some guys obviously have no clue, probably taking cues from porn they have seen, but are not in synch with the bottom they are fingering. Not communicating, be it verbal and asking or reading the bottoms response to what he is doing. Also, sex with a guy who is detached from what he is doing seems to happen more with fingers in my experience. It's a lot harder to be detached when using a Cock than it is using a finger? i can tell if a Guy is using His finger because He wants to turn me on and make me hornier for Him vs a guy just sticking his finger in. Also, a finger can be a prelude to fisting, and when a guy progresses to more fingers quickly and is obviously wanting to get his hand in without taking time to properly open the bottom, there's an obvious disconnect.
  9. i've had hundreds of Cocks in t-rooms, when i first started having sex with Men, it was my primary resource... but that was before online, cell phones and aps, when cruising was a big method of how one got to hook up. As a repressed kid full of hormones and desire, i'd go to restrooms and sit in a stall for hours just to be around guys i knew wanted sex with guys. my first clue was all the messages on the stall walls. There were phone numbers, dates and full on ads lol. A lot of my initial education about t-room sex came from reading the messages on stall walls. Also, holes in the dividing stall walls for peeping, or glory holes let you know someone is using, or has used, the location for sex. Hormones and the sex drive did the rest. As others have noted, hang out long enough and someone will make it clear. Each "tapping" discreetly initially, but some are so horny it doesn't take long for a tapping foot to become a cock or ass. Others are more shy and demure, maybe new; there is no one standard response. As to what you want? That was always pretty clear. A Guy would slide His legs and hard cock under the wall and i'd sit on His cock. Or conversely, i'd present my ass and a Guy would slide in. The toilet paper notes back and forth can be a way of more detail, an early form of gay texting that has since evolved? Careful with that one though. Vice cops used to go to active t-rooms and pretend to cruise and entrap guys, that probably happens a lot less these days, but notes can be used as evidence against you, so make sure he's passing the same note back and not keeping them. Mall restrooms used to be great... i don't think Amazon offers the same service? Parks are another source, as are rest stops with truckers who have sleepers conveniently attached to their trucks, but late night or 24 hour sex in rest stop restrooms is a thing, probably one of the more active sources still around?
  10. i stand corrected. i should have been more careful in my phrasing. i think You are absolutely right. i think it's a type of Islam, fundamentalist, that influences much of the Middle Eastern culture that results in destructive ignorance. i read a book a few years ago: "Infidel" by Ayaan Hirsi Ali. It's a spellbinding autobiography by a woman who grew up in a strict fundamentalist Islamic culture in Somalia and Saudi Arabia. i was struck by the similarities between the fundamentalist Islamic culture she grew up in and the fundamentalist Christian culture i grew up in in the US. i do not doubt that there are ignorant people world wide who would kill faggots for a variety of ignorant reasons.
  11. i thought Your joke was good 😉 i guess it depends on what a guy wants out of sex? i've recently been hooking with a Man who is very out of shape, i seriously have concerns that He might have a heart attack while He is fucking and breeding me. He's not my idea of visually appealing... at all. But damn, i am sooooo fucking happy to have Him whenever He breeds me. my one and foremost criteria for hookup sex is He has to want to fuck and breed me as much as i want to be fucked and bred. I.e., the desire has to be mutual. i've never given a 'sympathy fuck' and i would turn one down. For me, it's about the connection of mutual lust and need, and that comes in every shape, size, age, race... okay, it does have to be bareback, but then, i do not consider gloved sex to be sex... the barrier between us makes it something different to me, like mutual masturbation.
  12. some more... This is not a criticism or judgement, more of open query. i wonder if we experience glut or shortage more because we often reduce our connections with men to cock, cum and hole? When i consider the times i do that, it seems to be that i've reduced my own complex desire/needs for a Man down to the bare minimum? my profiles on sites where i am looking for more than hook up sex are often books or mini series lol. i'm pretty cerebral and have spent a lot of introspective time and effort trying to understand what i want/need from a relationship with a Man, and while it is always sexual, the Top/bottom dynamic is a lot more complex than "insert A into b, move about, release, depart." i can find semblance of what i want/need in hook up sex, but i've come to compare it to fast food. It fills the vacuum of hunger, is full of satisfying salt, sugar and fat, but i'd rather be eating a sit down meals with all the fixins and wonder if i had that if id even want fast food? Or maybe fast food would become the supplement. i wonder if it's reversing what would work best to reduce our need/desire to cock, cum and cunt? i know, it's not a perfect analogy. i also look at our needs/desires as a sort of puzzle with 1000 pieces needed to make up the whole picture. i see multiple anonymous hook ups as one way to acquire those puzzle pieces, and maybe it's just easier to get one piece from a thousand guys than try to find a guy that has 300 or __________ pieces? Or maybe even enough to make sense of the picture? thinking out loud, not reaching any grand conclusions here.
  13. To me this topic is way too big and complex for me to come to a simple, absolute conclusion. i do have some thoughts, but wouldn't want to come off as arguing from a conclusive general position, this is just my personal, individual thoughts/feelings (some may be kinda out there lol, like the first one below). i wonder about the Chinese population (in China). For many years, the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) dictated to the Chinese people that they could only have one child. One of the awful results was male children were valued more than female. According to Encyclopedia Britannica: "The one-child policy produced consequences beyond the goal of reducing populationgrowth. Most notably, the country’s overall sex ratio became skewed toward males—roughly between 3 and 4 percent more males than females." [think before following links] https://www.britannica.com/topic/one-child-policy i wonder if the Chinese gay population is more Top heavy as a result? i'm on one dating site that is a bit more relationship than hook up oriented (for a gay site), and there are Chinese guys living in China on the site (using a VPN). Those i've encountered, looking at profiles or being looked at, have almost all been top? That's obviously purely subjective info, but it got me thinking, if we only apply supply and demand notions, and consider the bisexual male population of China, there may be more Tops in China than bottoms. For the pedants among us, yeah, i know this is not scientific, it's just a thought to add to the mix, not an argued conclusion on my part. my point is, there can be lots of complex factors that can affect the number of tops or bottoms in a population. For a versatile to conclude something along the line that total bottoms are just selfish assholes, strikes me as divisive and a problem, not part of a solution. i've heard that notion before, but never heard a versatile (i.e. the kind who make the universal judgement that all men are really like them: versatile) proffer that: "all Total Tops are just selfish assholes." This attitude makes me think of my time spent in the cultural fundamentalist ideals prison where i was conditioned to believe all people are heterosexual. It seems particularly ego centric and 'selfish' to me to dismiss an entire population who identify as "bottom." i think reality is, anyone can be a selfish asshole, whether they be Top, bottom, versatile, gay, straight, Bi, Trans, ad infinitum. Ones sexual identity doesn't make them selfish. Those guys running around at ABS or sex clubs, closing doors and trying to divert attention away from others could be versatile, bottom, or even Top. To me, whatever their sexual identity, they prove themselves to be "selfish assholes," by their attitude and behavior. When i encounter such people, i typically just leave the venue. i don't want to be around people like that. Even at my horniest, i'm not so desperate that i would want to steal or thwart an opportunity to fuck or get fucked from another guy. i do not think much about the Top/bottom ratio, but more about the gay population in general. i live in a smallish town with a smaller gay population. i travel to a larger city or a place with a larger gay population if i want multiple guys to fuck me, and never leave disappointed. i have come to a place in my life where sex is more about quality than quantity. i confess, both can be hard to find, but i also have discovered (about myself) that when i am getting quality connection with a Man, i don't need the same quantity, and the ratio of Tops:bottoms becomes less of an issue for me.
  14. Just left... He wanted me to suck Him first, which when a Man enjoys and gets obvious pleasure, i get mesmerized and am all over Him. i love receiving a Man into me, and when He is into it, it's perfection. i loved making love to Him via His Cock, it's the only way i feel i can be sorta on top and giving Him pleasure. i have His Cock scent all over my face, which is a bonus of sucking a Mans Cock, i get my face marked with His scent. He can do that with His piss and cum, but that feels really wasteful to me, and i always crave to swellow all that, but His Cock, Balls and Crotch scent? Fuck, i lick and kiss and suck and rub my face between His Cock, Balls and Thighs (fuck, i love a Mans thghs) and i'm in heaven. Then He moans and growls and says: "I wanna fuck you," and He proceeds to tune my ass inside out with His Cock. He touches and holds my body in His hands, kisses my back, arms and shoulders, spanks my ass and pounds the hell out of me, breeds and possesses me. fuck
  15. i think it's a great question. For me it's not a matter of random or FB, but about connecting mutual desire and need. i think one of the ruts we can fall into with a partner or ongoing FB is we start fucking our memory instead of the person. We get a collection of memories and then form a picture of who the person is and how the experience will be, positive and negative memories can set up expectations of a similar great encounter or concerns of a not so great time. With a random stranger all we have is our projected desire, but how often does that turn out as we want or expect? Personally, i've come to feel we don't get what we want/need because we don't communicate very well as part of the process of finding a sex partner. i find few guys who know what they want/need, or more likely, are afraid to open up about it. Instead we have boxes we can check that identify generic stuff and homogenize a very individual and person act.
  16. To me where most gay film struggles is presenting gays as men vs men who happen to be gay. Or maybe i struggle with unconsciously expecting a film that fits my expectations instead of someone presenting their ideas and thoughts? The film hit notes for me, but the whole concert didn't resonate, but then, that's true about any movie (except Princess Bride). i did appreciate the efforts at being real, awkward, contradictory. i think the film made a decent exposure of how one may find they are not the person they think they are, especially when feeling the vulnerability of wanting and wanting to be wanted.
  17. Every other day. i practiced martial artsfor 25 years, then switched to Bikram Yoga when i injured my knee doing a jumping axe kick and landed wrong. Divorced, moved and went back to school and became a nurse, and didn't do anything for a few years. Started going to the gym about 14 months ago. i'm a group/social exerciser, so i didn't think i'd stay with it, but have been surprised that i'm now in the habit of going every other day. i do what i call "my skinny white boy routine." i'm not interested in having big muscles, i just want to be toned and have some definition, shape. Okay, the glut extension is always my first machine lol, secretly (no longe lol) i want an ass that screams: "BREED ME." my gym? About 2/3 guys, maybe 1/3 women? maybe more 75/25? As for how many are gay? idk, i wish i could tell, i definitely get a lot from the eye candy.
  18. A few months ago, i was approached by this young college student on Squirt. He was from the middle east, a culture that kills faggots. He was shy and new and wanting to get fucked. He struck me as a sort of 'babe in the woods' and i feared for him and his first experience, i didn't want someone inexperienced just ramming in and him having a bad first experience (rolls eyes at self). Hey, i love guys, and my heart went out to him. i could relate to his need. So, while explaining that i am 'total bottom,' i offered to be his first. i was nervous as fuck. i hadn't penetrated a person with my penis since getting divorced from a woman in 2008. i had to take Viagra to ensure i could even get it up, i'm not a fucker or top. i did manage to get erect, but penetrating him was hard because he was so tight. Normal tightness from lack of use. i suppose if i had the drive and desire of a top, it would have been easier, but i kept going to soft because he was so tight. Not only was getting in difficult, but so was staying in. It was like his hole was always pushing me out. Again, i can imagine some tops liking the idea of conquering such a hole, but to me it was uninviting, unreceptive and more of a challenge than a fuck. He ended up cumming very fast and i really never got fully in, nor did i really fuck him, more ike a couple of partial insertions.
  19. A little different take on this. For me, this is gets into mind fuck... which i love, and i know i'm not alone in this. To me, this is about control, seduction. i think we can experience both without violating a persons volition. Of course, i cannot fathom not receiving a Mans seed into me. Hell, once i have it, i don't want to let it back out. i'll cramp and clench to hold it in. i think it's part of a lot off bottoms nature to want/need to be controlled and seduced, taken, possessed, ad infinitum lol. i also think it's part of a lot of Tops natures to have corresponding desires/needs to control, seduce, take, possess, ad infinitum. One way i can experience all of these is by sharing one orgasm, the Tops. i.e., i don't have an orgasm of my own, but instead get my orgasm from Him. It can use some of the techniques some have described, like sucking or stimulating a bottoms penis to make him really horny, but then not giving him the release of his own orgasm, but Top replaces the bottoms orgasm with His. To me, You don't even have to be devious about it if You really tap into a lot of bottoms nature, You can condition a bottom to crave Your orgasm and seed and be disappointed if he has his own orgasm and not Yours. idk, this is one idea, i've got others, but to me it's got a lot of the same Top/bottom psychology behind it. Honestly, there are things that are very arousing to me and appealing about these Men getting a bottom to take Their seed, so i look for what is behind it without violating a persons trust or volition.
  20. my Sweet Latinon FB just left. Was a surprise visit, although it's always spontaneous. But 0930 on a Monday morning was not even on my radar. Was walking out the door to go have a late breakfast on a non work day for me, and my phones starts buzzing and His ID comes up. He told me He had a break in 30 minutes and asked if i could be ready... i look at my watch and my only concern is being prepped in time for Him... i always want Him. So i scramble out of my clothes and into the shower to clean out, and worried i would not be ready in time. i fear for the time i'm just to fast and miss something, i don't want Him to experience anything but pleasure and release. Not altruistic lol, it's just that all my pleasure is connected and dependent on my Tops, i'd rather go without sex if the desire and pleasure is not mutual. He was on break, so it was a quick breed. i've gotten the impression before that He cums fast, and usually multiple times. i have never minded a fast cummer, to me that just emphasizes a Mans desire, which is awesome to me. Still, He keeps fucking after He comes, and i'm never sure if He is doing it for me or Him? Like He feels like He has to give me a longer fuck? i've told Him in a subtle way before that it doesn't matter to me how long He takes, not sure He feels that way on His own though. He left happy and sated, and i feel nothing but high and happy as well. To me, mutually desired/needed breeding with a Man has nothing to do with time, it can be 30 seconds or 30 minutes, as long as it's real, i get pregnant from Him.
  21. Never hooked with a Guy from BB here in Oregon. i live in a smallish town, 60k. i imagine it's more active in Portland, seems to be when i check it out, though i have never used it while in Portland. i used it while on vacation in Ft Lauderdale FL and got decent response.
  22. At work. i changed careers about 10 years ago from executive management to critical care nurse. i have experienced being fucked in my office when a VP, but never at the hospital where i work and am around so many sexy Men. When i was a VP, i used to cruse a restroom at a busy mall near my office on lunch break. There was a Guy who would breed me on a regular basis under a stall wall there. One day, unknown to me, He followed me after and found out where i worked. my office was a corner office on the second floor with floor to ceiling glass on the outer walls, looking out over the parking lot. He started leaving notes on my car to meet Him in the first floor restroom and He'd breed me under the stall wall there. It got to where He'd park where He knew i could see His car from my office and He'd go into the restroom and wait for me, i'd go down stairs and get in the stall next to His, He'd slide His legs and Cock under the wall with spit on His Cock and i'd straddle Him and receive His Cock and Seed. Still want that at the hospital where i work, but it's less likely, way too busy.
  23. Ditto pretty much every response here... but then, this is BZ lol. i don't think one can disconnect the physical from the psychological. We can be unaware, but i don't think it's possible to have 'just physical' sex. Using a condom, whether required by Top or bottom, means someone is holding back, that giving into fear and compromise is part of the event. For me, sex is about the connection between me and the Man i am with and a condom is a (purposeful) impediment to connection. To me, it's a contradiction. As an aside, i think we can also wear psychological/emotional 'condoms,' and that the best sex is when we manage to be open and vulnerable with each other and totally connect in the moment.
  24. Bout 10 minutes ago, my Sweet Latino FB. Was out weeding in the garden when He called... and i heed the call of nature. Damn, i'm so full of cum right now, probably am not going to do a very good weeding. i feel like a rag doll, He's a muscle stud and it's like getting fucked by a semi truck, and at the same time He kisses my back and shoulders... fucking drives me wild. He fucks me till i am limp and pliant, wide open. i feel fucking awesome.
  25. A perpetual wet spot on the back of my easy access shorts with dried cum on my inner thighs.
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