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tallslenderguy

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Everything posted by tallslenderguy

  1. i get pleasure from small cocks from the pleasure the Top has using it with me. For me there are a lot of layers to sex, the physical is one of those layers of course, and i would not diminish that. On the other hand, just as important, and maybe more so to me is the connection of mutual desire. For me, a defining attribute of a Top is not His penis, but His 'cock.' i see that as way more than a physical organ. i have a penis, about 7.5 inches and a little above average girth, but i don't have what i perceive as a "cock" because i do not have the drive, need, desire to penetrate, fuck, orgasm and breed with it. And i connect to all of those things with a Man/Top. i've received smaller than 3 inch cocks with a Man, one was a FB for awhile, and He ended up possessing me as Top because i connected and bonded with all those other parts of His cock, and that was/is "pleasure."
  2. i didn't have sex with Men, or otherwise, at that age... religion for me too. But i knew about it and was super frustrated because i wanted it soooooo badly. i read "City of Night" by John Rechy when i was 13. i was living in L.A. and the book is about a hustler coming to grips with being gay in Los Angeles. All the areas He wrote about were familiar to me. i used to sit in restroom stalls for hours reading the notes on the walls and listening to guys in the other stalls to see if they were like me, wanting sex. i knew about it, masturbated thinking of Men all the time, but didn't actually have sex with a Man till i was 27. i did make up for it though 😉
  3. It depends. if i'm wanting multiple cocks one after the other, neither. Like others have noted, the flake factor is huge with either scenario. i go to an ABS if i am wanting multiple cocks. i find lunch or quitting time are best for Men wanting a quick nutt on the way home from work or at lunch time. If i am wanting quality over quantity, home with a fuck buddy. Once you know Someone, and they you, there's trust and kinks can be explored, or not, but at least you don't have to deal with flakes.
  4. i'm more bottom than sub, so i do not have the disposition that i have to assume any position a Man wants... though i certainly want to please Him as part of who and how i am. i'm tall, 6'5", with long legs. Most guys cannot reach my hole in 'doggie' position, cannot remember the last time a Man even wanted me that way? Easily 98% of the time i am prone, on my stomach, and most Men take me with my legs closed. i love being on my stomach and encounter no issues with it, i love the vulnerability i feel and how in control He is. i'm pretty pliable, so if He shifts me on my side or back, i don't encounter issues. The only position i have real physical trouble with is me on top, straddling or riding his cock. i can count on less than one hand the number of times i have done that when a Top managed to manipulate my sub side over my bottom side. i blew out my left knee doing a jumping axe kick and landing wrong, so that position is really painful for that knee. i also don't like it psychologically because it violates something in me to be on top like that.
  5. Just left.. my regular sweet Latino Fuck Buddy that i'm always writing about on this thread, usually a couple times a week. Really love Him, just a sweet, simple ongoing fuck relationship. He just got off work and can be spontaneous, so this time i prepped in anticipation and was ready for Him. He was tired after a long day working, pouring concrete, which i know is tiring work, been pouring sidewalks at my house a section at a time. But He's young and horny all the time, and i love being there for Him. i'm always waiting naked and ass up on my bed, He comes i says "Hi" and undresses, climbs up on my bed, straddles my thighs and lubes and wastes no time sliding in. He always alternates between hard and soft fucking, likes to press His hand oni the small of my back when He is fucking hard. Then He stretches out on me, gently kisses my back and shoulders, which for some reason turns me into a totally opened craving sub. He came pretty fast this time, i think He really just wanted to nutt... which suits me fine, i hate the feeling of a Man ever feeling like He has to perform, i get my deepest satisfaction when He is obviously happy and stated after. He was and i am. What could be more perfect?
  6. idk, i''m sure i've received more than a thousand cocks, but it's not just getting fucked, i have had hook ups and Fuck Buddies Who purposely and purposefully opened me as part of Their breeding. To me that really fucking HOT part of that is it's usually subtle, like each time He builds on what He did before, especially found this with FB's and i get a sense that They are often molding me each time... which to me is a form of impregnation. BTW, i'm pretty proactive i putting myself out there, i advertise for Men like that in my profiles. Doesn't often work, a lot of guys have no idea what i'm talking about, but the Men who are like that do and we attract and feed each other. i should add that i'm not putting myself out there as an example of how it should be done, just sharing my personal experience. A lot of guys use dildos and plugs to open and stretch, and have a lot of success, i'm just not wired that way though.
  7. For me it's been a result of getting penetrated and fucked by Men. Sounds simple on the surface lol. But while i'll receive pretty much any Man who wants to breed me, i do look for more than just any cock in a storm. The longer i have been at this, the more my sexuality is tied to my psychology, and the more i desire Men similarly integrated. i am deeply attracted to Men who are connected to what They are doing when They penetrate, fuck and breed another ( i go for Buddhist Men). i don't put things in my own hole to open it, i get the rationale, but it's not me. i want my hole molded and opened by the Men who use it. The result of that long term approach and desire for me has been a pretty damned accommodating hole. The only time i feel pain is when a Man with a really big cock just shoves in, but anymore, even that i adjust to pretty fast. i have not had to use lots of big dildos or plugs, it's fashioned by and for Men... which makes me pretty damned happy lol. That does have it's drawbacks in some ways, i still have never taken a fist, and i cannot receive ginormous dildos if a Man is inclined to penetrate me with them, but cocks? i cannot remember the last time a cock caused me pain. But my hole is changed. i know a lot of guys speak of their holes going back to 'normal,' mine closes some, but it is also permanently more open.
  8. Nah, i don't want literally "torn." i had an anal fissure when i was younger, and that was before Men had permanently molded my hole and made it for receiving vs expelling and retaining. Anal tears are very painful, and as downtownswallow notes, leave you wide open to infection, you don't want what comes out of your ass going into your blood. With a tear, good luck being able to receive a Mans cock while you have it? i don't see that as a realistic scenario for most guys, more fantasy material? That said, for me the power dynamic between Top and bottom is not ever expressed by force, meanness or bullying. Those kinds of attitudes come across to me as weakness, not power. They seem compensatory, like the Man doesn't really know who he is and what he has with a 'bottom' guy like me. He doesn't have to do any of those things to make me who i am, i'm already that person. To me, the art and beauty of opposites attracting and bonding is natural. Personally, i love when a Man purposely and purposefully opens and molds my hole, not in a destructive way, but a creative way. i have a slash where i used to have a pucker and that is the 'mark' that Men have left on me. my hole is open and receptive, that is the power and mark of Men using it for Their need and pleasure, not because They are vicariously trying to destroy some inner demon by trashing who they want and need, but rather They are exercising Their very real natural power and position to mark and possess those who need/want to be marked and possessed by Them.
  9. "Side" seems an appropriate term, and side dishes can enhance a good meal, though my hunger would never be filled without the main entree.
  10. my "last load" was actually about an hour after this one. While i was still basking in the afterglow, and my brain high on endorphins, my other FB who i write about often these days, contacted me and wanted sex. i let Him know i had just been bred, not really knowing how He'd respond, i think He's considered me to be pretty exclusive. Not that He expects that, it's just the way its' been (for me, He has a girl friend, but i think i'm His only male fuck). He was not very vocal about it when i told Him, but He came right over. It did take Him less time to orgasm than it usually does, so maybe that's some sort of indication? idk, He's pretty shy about talking sex, or maybe He's just casual about it. After, we talked a little. He says He feels comfortable with me and says we could hang out and watch a movie some time? It has been awhile since i've had two Men one right after the other. Guess covid is officially over for me (kidding).
  11. Yes, i'm ridiculously analytical, but ever since i left fundamentalism as an approach to life, it's different. i know longer need to understand or know why, even though i remain eternally curious. i used to have to be able to rationalize my behavior, and thereby rationalizing who and how i am. Now, i want to live real and honestly, but i don't have to know or understand why in order to accept how i am. Piss is always a good example for me. i know i am excited and engaged as fuck with a Man who wants, and even more if He needs me to be His toilet. Just writing that still feels kind of weird. i have come to understand that it's not the piss i am connecting with or wanting , but so many of things associated with it: e.g., willingness to give myself as a receptacle even for a Mans waste because i want Him so much and want His pleasure using me so much, and so many other connecting places. What i don't understand or know is why piss in particular? Sure, i can speculate, but i know it's just conjecture... but that doesn't matter to me, nor does it stop me from acting AND connecting with a Man who has the same desire/need. Honestly, that's the same with me across the board with some of the more general things like being gay, or being total bottom. my looking for understanding and knowledge brought me to one of the most liberating pieces of understanding (for me), and that is that i do not have to understand reality to fully accept and live in it. The important thing to me is seeing what is and living honesty with reality.
  12. just left... second time with "Bigbear" He likes to get sucked first to get hard, but He got hard pretty fast this time. He also wanted me to straddle Him 69 while i sucked Him so He could "play with my pussy," He rimmed and fingered me, obviously wanting to open my hole. i do love that, as usual, more than the physical feel of it, the energy and control coming from the Man, the goal and raw lust to mold and open my hole sends me over the edge. Sometimes i'm a little embarrassed and unsure because some Men have this effect of evoking this moaning, almost squealing pussy sometimes. I wonder WTF, where did that come from? But it's like i get overcome and out it comes. He just used spit and His fingers were kinda rough when i was over Him, but i think He may have been doing that on purpose to sorta make my lips swell? idk. He flipped me on my stomach and fucked me hard with His beer can cock, and then would pull out and then used lots of lube and tried to get more fingers in. When He shot His load deep, i had the rare experience of actually feeling His cum shoot inside of me... that never happens, i have heard of others feeling the actual load, but i don't feel semen... i feel piss, but not semen, so that drove me wild too. i was babbling like a bitch saying "thank You " probably way too much. Another thing that almost never happens is after He pulled out, i felt His cum leaking down my leg. i work hard to keep a Mans seed because i really want to absorb Him, but He gapped me and i had not control to clench and hold it in. i was able to milk His cock when He came, but i guess i was to opened to be able to close it all the way after. It's starting to close now, but it's still loose. Fuck, i am both horny and satisfied.
  13. Some thoughts. i think asking why we ask is also a valid, and important, part of discovery. Often, hidden in our questions, are spoken and unspoken standards we've been culturally conditioned by/with. For instance, on the surface we're gay, and we know a big portion of American culture still thinks gay people are sick and perverted. Age gap is another layer to that, though often the religious culture that calls us 'sinful and perverted' has a different standard when it comes to age. But no matter, religious or not, age gap figures in to a lot of peoples emotional, knee jerk standard of 'right and wrong.' Even if one questions and can be free of social notions that they do not deem as correct, we still have to live in a society where many/most hold those standards and will react to you and yours accordingly. I.e., expect to be judged and ridiculed openly and subtly. Also i think we can usually expect some of those notions to surface in our selves along the way. Even though we may not consciously accept all the cultural ideas we've grown up with, that does not mean they have not been ingrained in us. For instance, i have a kink where i am attracted to a Man who need/wants me to receive His piss. Obviously cannot be open about that to just anyone, at least, not without repercussions. Part of me deeply needs/wants a kind of affectionate degradation/humiliation that goes along with that. For the longest time, i couldn't figure out why. i'm not into being abused, i do not think i am less than and another is superior (not judging that, just saying it's not me). So i wanted to understand why i wanted/needed this? i've come to believe that my feelings of degradation/humiliation are real, but conditioned. my need desire is for a Mans desire/need/lust with me, and when He has this kink and i do to, it's a place of deep connection and bonding. So, even though i may be feeling degraded and humiliated, at the same time i am being affirmed and desired. What is being affirmed is real, it's a part of me. my real need outweighs my conditioning, gets overwhelmed by it making the experience paradoxical, but really a positive thing. Good luck trying to explain this to someone at church lol. i'd say follow your needs and desires, but do it eyes wide open. It's an opportunity for self discovery and affirmation of a part of yourself that has want/need.
  14. This is me 100% i've taken lots of piss up the ass and love being impregnated that way. To me a Mans piss is another form of His seed. Hey, male dogs use it to mark Their territory. i was concerned about both taste and amount the first time i tried. Flow didn't challenge me but the taste did. i'd like to have a Man Who's well hydrated, i too think it would be som much better. i love the mind fuck of it, especially when the Top is into a sort of affectionate degradation, where He gets off on Me wanting it and me loving being His toilet. i love when a Man is obviously turned on by just His desire being enough to get me to want His cock pissing down my throat.
  15. i'm more of a big picture guy. To me a Mans cock is always more than an organ between His legs, it's also His horny desire/need to use that organ that attracts me. When i perceive desire from another man, i typically present (i.e., offer my ass) in some fashion, at the very least usually involves turning my backside towards them and casually touching it to draw Their attention to my intention. If the desire is there, They usually let me know in some way. It's the wonderful gay mating dance.
  16. Wow! What a wonderful post. Thank you for this Tanbbottom. Like many, we have a lot in common. i too have a religious background that led to a 31 year marriage to a woman. i too love/loved this person, and i think she did me in some ways, though her beliefs made it impossible for her to wholly love and accept me. i spent a big chunk of my life admitting i'm attracted to Men, while believing because of that conditioning that i was twisted and broken. All those years of trying to change turned out to be me processing through, and out of, the cultural conditioning that made me both think and feel i was 'sick, sinful, broken, etc., etc.." i think a lot of guys stay stuck, or carry baggage from being conditioned against the reality of who and how they are, because instead of processing through it, they give up and 'rebel' against it. i single quote "rebel" because i that is the conditioned word for it, the truth is what is often "rebelled" against, with no small amount of cognitive dissonance, turns out to be a paper tiger when seen in process. As i see it, monogamy is often guarded by that paper tiger. i think discussions like this that question and examine the reasons and emotions we have regarding norms like monogamy, can expose the good and bad in the concept and free us from absolutist conditioned emotions and ideas that, often unconsciously, accompany it/them. i'd give you a lot more credit for communication skill than you seem to give yourself, i think you communicate beautifully in your post. To me, one of the biggest impediments to communicate is fear of vulnerability. That fear causes one to hide feelings or thoughts (often even from our self) that one perceives puts them at risk for rejection, or worse. The price tag for that fear and hiding is we cannot communicate or find acceptance without exposure and vulnerability, so we can find ourselves alone... even in our most intimate relationships. i think making a rule out of monogamy, or many other relational rules, often discourages open communication and thwarts the very bond it supposedly supports.
  17. i love this! i have a thing for mind fuck, and for me, that usually comes in the form of Guys who don't fit the stereotype. in this case, a young twink in lace panties who turns out to be a Dom Top. That is soooooo hot.
  18. Oh fuck, great post. Damn, there was a time when i lived in public washrooms, sitting in a stall waiting for someone to come in and then, cum in. There was a time when we as gays were illegal and finding each other in secret was one of the ways we connected with those of our kind. i did A LOT of connecting, but never had to leave my number. As a sexually repressed kid, i'd go and sit for hours just wanting to be around guys who wanted guys. Even though i wasn't brave enough to have sex with guys, reading the stall walls nurtured ad affirmed me in a way.
  19. Just barely walked Him to the door. It's been awhile since i have hooked with someone besides my sweet FB, who i love and appreciate. This guy was older, 59, and lied about his weight... had quite a gut on Him. But i'm experienced enough to know guys lie, He still had the energy, need and desire to penetrate a bottom and breed. He told me ahead of time that He liked to take time, really liked to get His cock sucked first, then flip a bottom on his stomach and take His time opening and fucking. He's a grower vs shower. He started out small and flaccid, which does;t bother me in the least, as long as He can get hard and fuck, i don't really care what He has. Still, i was surprised. His cock was not particularly long, but it was thick. Thicker than i realized while sucking Him. i guess since He wasn't way long, i didn't notice as much how thick He was. Till He flipped me on my stomach and pushed in. i have a well used slash, i probably am over confident about What i can receive, but this Man made me yelp with surprise, not pain, but He got my attention fast. And He kept hitting my prostate and knew He was. There was a puddle of precum under me that He milked out with HIs cock. Fuck, He opened me wide and almost had me conquered really fast, but i didn't want to disappoint Him, and started squeezing the hell out of HIs cock with my ass muscles... my turn to return the surprise. He really liked that, which of course made me feel so good, i pushed my ass back into His pubis, right where His prostate is, while squeezing His cock. He liked that too. Fuck, i was in heaven. When He shot, He bred me deep and by then i was His, He had me and pulled out with slippery ass massage and spanks. i have one of those 'wrecked' holes right now, Awesome wrecked. i was a blithering idiot, grateful to be bred faggot. The way He talks, i think He wants to be a regular FB. Hell yeah.
  20. Ah, You're such a sweet and affirming Man. You have such a big and fertile 'cock,' Your words are Your seed that often breeds and impregnates me. if only the world were such a free and accepting place, eh? Yet no one approached me and said: "i'm sorry for your loss." (i hate losing a Mans seed) lol
  21. For some reason, this brought back a memory of a Guy about my age i hooked with a long time ago, i was in my 30's, in Baltimore when i was there on business. i was at Harborplace and a guy chatted me up. He was not able to hook right then, but wanted to the next day, He lived in Federal Hill nearby and told me he'd meet me the next day. He told me he had a boyfriend who was totally cool with him hooking up. The next day, we met up and walked the short distance to His house. We were both horny and i found Him attractive, apparently He found me attractive too. We made out, which i really liked and rarely got with a Guy. He was a smoker and self conscious about His breath, which had a smokey mint flavor from Him brushing His teeth to try an remove the scent... i didn't mind. i started to go down on Him and He shyly told me He really wanted to fuck me. i opened and happily received HIm. His good sized cock went deep when He unloaded, so i didn't realize the size of His load. Seconds after He shot, His boyfriend came into the room where we were naked and lying there. i felt really awkward, the guy was about twice as old as us and casually sat clothed on the bed next to us, freshly smelling of sex. They invited e out to eat dinner, so we got dressed and walked back over to Harborplace to a nice restaurant. While we were seated at the table ordering, i suddenly felt the Guys load trying to make it's way out of me. i panicked, we were in the middle of a nice restaurant. i excused myself and made my way to the restroom, but He had shot a huge load into me and it was not staying in. i felt His seed slide out of my hole and down my leg. In the restroom, i saw i had a wet spot on my bottom, about 3 inches across. There was nothing i could do, i made my way back to the table, i have no idea if anyone noticed.
  22. About 2 hours ago. my awesome FB. He told me He wanted my ass so bad yesterday, but it was Christmas and He had family stuff. He told me He is feeling very relaxed with me, which i am glad for. The last 2x He has asked me if He could suck me about half way through fucking. He knows i am total bottom, so He's respectful, i just don't think He grasps what that means, even though He's heard all the words that i'm not into having my penis touched that i "don't have a cock" (i can be really cerebral about sex lol). He said He really liked it and asked if He could do it again. i really like Him, so i was okay with it, if not actually wanting or needing it. The reverse would be a no go for me, i only want a Man to do what He desires, but He seems okay with just sucking me ever though i don't cum or particularly want that. He wanted me to stand and Him kneel sucking. Doesn't last long, He gets turned on and wants to go back to fucking me. He is making more sounds, which i love. i love a verbal Man. i consider myself fortunate to have a regular FB living in a small town. He wants to fuck usually a few times a week and He always leaves me weak kneed and seeded.
  23. For me it's never been about a "need to taste someone's cum," but a combination of several things: for me, first it's about receiving penetration from a Man who wants/needs to put His cock in me, me sucking or Him fucking is part of that penetration and expression of lust, next is receiving His orgasm/pleasure into me. When a Man has an orgasm in/because of me it's as if His orgasm becomes mine and that's an orgasm for me. i find it deeply satisfying, i'm not frustrated at all from not having my own orgasm, id much rather receive/share His. Seed/cum is the finale. i don't particularly get anything from the sense of taste when it cums to cum, taste of cum is a neutral experience for me... i do love the scent though. i always end up having His scent on my face and i never wash that off, i love continuing to smell His lust after. Drinking piss from a Mans cock has a lot of similarities for me, and i'm still working on the taste part, i find the taste sort of overwhelming, but all the other elements mentioned above, and then some, make me lust after Him doing that.
  24. my older brother was gay (he died of AID's during the 80's), he was 13 years older than me. We never had sex, not even a hint of it. i don't get the attraction of sex with an immediate family member, have never experienced it. i did have a major crush on a cousin as a kid and teen, i still have occasional dreams where we are teens and having sex, but that never happened IRL. Cousin didn't 'feel' like immediate family to me though, more like a friend.
  25. About a half hour ago, still feeling that shaky high that goes along with a sweet fuck. As usual lately, my beautiful FB. Apparently He was working nearby and had to leave and go back, so He had time and hit me up. He tried the last 2 days, but if i don't get His message right away, He's very spontaneous and ends up doing something else. i actually believe Him when He says i'm the only guy He's fucking? Go figure, i'd be fine if i wasn't, but feel very fortunate to be the male object of His desire (He's Bi). He fucked me 3 times, which is a first. He usually says He cums a couple of times while fucking me, idk, i can't tell because He is a silent cummer and i think He just keeps fucking after He has an orgasm. He's a Young (25) Muscle Guy and has a lot of stamina. Turns out, so do i as a bottom, i didn't wear out despite being pounded pretty hard for over an hour. Advantage of being a bottom my whole life, i'm sure plenty of my brothers here can relate. i'm definitely opened and full of cum, feels like about a gallon, pure bliss. He fucked me 2 times, me face down on my bed (my favorite position, and apparently His too), and once standing, bent over the bed, which was also fucking HOT. Between fucks He showered and asked me if l liked to get sucked. i don't really, i am truly total bottom and, while i have a penis, don't have a 'cock," just not wired to penetrate another guy. But, He's really sweet and He doesn't have a lot of experience with guys i think. He's been watching porn, like any normal guy, and has been wanting to try what He's seen of course. So i let Him suck me. He was actually pretty good at it. He wanted to try several positions. At first He tried getting me hard the way any normal Top would by jerking my penis. i explained i usually get soft from getting fucked. He asked what makes me hard, and i explained a Man wanting to fuck me or use me with His cock gets me hard. He seemed mystified by that, not sure He understood? He sucked me lying on my back, standing with him kneeling, then He wanted to lie on the bed and have me face fuck him. That one didn't last too long, pretty sure he had never done that and i don't think he really got into it, especially the gagging part. He stopped me, got this look in His eyes and said: "i want to fuck you." i have a feeling this is just part of His journey and He's probably all Top.
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