its a state of mind that varies from person to person "feeling like a women" it could be looking feminine feeling feminine, you could in a way say "treated like a women" as a better expression.
i would say to you do you "feel gay" and why are you, where you born that way, way you where raised that way etc. its not about feeling like a sex object but feeling like you which can mean feeling sexy but it dont have to be
the problem is there are different levels, crossdressing transvestism are fetishes and usually sexual.
Transgender isnt a fetish its who the person. Most true transgenders you wont notice from a casual glance as they blend in, because they want to be seen as a person not a object/fetish for others , if you look close you might spot the male attributes adams apple broad shoulders etc. Transgender isnt about rebelling or the way you are raised but a need to be yourself
also sex and gender are different male female are biological sexes. there are so many genders too many labels and labels are dangerous really as you cant pigeonhole people into one easily as they might not agree
i write this from my point of view as gender fluid as a guy i have female attributes high cheekbones, girls lips, softer voice, graceful female walk and "camp" mannerisms that i have no control of . im more a guy than girl but i need both sides male and female to feel happy in myself