I Just Have To Tell Someone... I Have Hsv2. :(

[ToyBoy]

So I was feeling fine until today, emotionally that is.  After a huge-drunken fight where we actually broke up- and subsequently got back together, my boyfriend finally opened our relationship (and allowed me to have no internet restrictions as well).  

 

So on the first night that I was allowed to hook up with someone - I made it happen with a bottom who really wasn't that cute.  

 

A few days after what turned out to be terrible and awkward sex... I noticed some of the first symptoms.  First the faint itch in my urethra, and then really painful urination.  What I originally thought was chlamydia or gonorrhea, started manifesting instead as HSV2.  My boyfriend was first to realize this, as his manifested in open anal sores.  then we both felt the fever, back/butt/thigh/calf/foot aches, and the tingling/burning sensation in the thighs/butt/balls/dick/inner thigh.

 

All the while, I was fine... it sucked of course and I was lamenting the shrinking of my pool of sexual partners, but i was fine.  

 

My bf went to the doctor today and got antivirals but I had yet to make an appointment (because my pain was less severe and I don't currently have a local primary care physician). 

 

Up till an hour ago,  my case was the rare form of HSV2 (intraurethral) which is not visible and manifests inside the urethra.  However,  noticing a faint itch around my head as I went to the bathroom, I checked and small bumps are starting on my frenulum.  

 

This is when it hit me... and I just feel so bummed... Nobody on Grindr is gonna want to risk it and at 23, I feel like playtime is over before it began... I haven't been single for very long since I came out and I've never had a slut phase.  I just really wanted the freedom to sleep with guys when the urge came and not worry about things... 

 

I know i'll be fine but.... ugh...

 

my other thought, as I tried to comprehend the changes this would mean - was that other HSV2 positive guys (which statistically is high in gay men) would be fine with hooking up but the boyfriend isn't interested in even entertaining the idea for the future.  But that is where my mind is at with this news--- how i will never have normal sex life again... 

 

And (I do read the stealth stories on here) but I could never do that intentionally... full disclosure is what I will be doing.  I also feel like this puts friends/and people who know me off the list for future intimacy...

 

I don't even know what I'll do If my boyfriend and I ever break up.

 

 

[bearbandit]

You have my sympathy... I had anal herpes for six months. The good news is that if you listen to your body, you'll learn the warning signs of an impending attack (for me it was the nerve pain down the back of my thighs). As soon as you get a warning that it's trying to resurface, hit the antivirals and continue with them until a good week after the last symptom goes down, just in case. The first bout is usually the worst with subsequent bouts having less and less intensity. My first attack was over twenty years ago and I honestly don't know when the last one was, probably when my CD4 count started moving upwards in 2000.

You're only infectious when you've got an active attack going (and, frankly you probably wouldn't feel much like sex anyway at this point), so be sure to watch out for your signs of an impending attack. That's when you stay off Grindr etc and get on with something else instead. As well as HIV I've got diabetes which can cause genital thrush: "Sorry, not just yet: I've thrush playing up. Should be okay in a week or two". You'll be substituting herpes for thrush... Always better to brazen in out, in my opinion. If you're not having an attack of herpes, you can't pass it on; if he's scared off by knowing the the virus is locked in and inactive, was he worth fucking? As I say on one of my profiles "If you're not comfortable with my HIV, we probably won't get on."

Okay, it's painful, but it goes away. At which point it might as well not be there. (I wish, how I wish!) It means a few adjustments to your sex life, but nothing so drastic as you fear. And you're not saying anything I haven't heard other guys with herpes say.

A couple of tips: it is said that there's an amino acid in mung beans (the little green ones used for bean sprouts) that herpes doesn't like, and cross chocolate off your list of treats: it contains an amino acid that herpes thrives on.

Good luck...

[Guest JizzDumpWI]

My doc keeps me on Acyclovir 3x daily. Haven't had an outbreak in years since starting that.

[FatFuckPigMA]

It's really not that big of a deal these days. The medications are much  better now and not everyone has recurring outbreaks. I've had only one since my initial infection back in the early 80s and that was a year after.  

[fillmyholeftl]

I take 1gm of Valtrex daily as maintenance to prevent outbreaks.

[Guest giftme]

Hey Virgin, yah, herpes suck. when i first got it I thought my sex life was over.  And then one day during an outbreak I was fucking horny.  So I went to a back room and got a blow job and fucked some guy.  I got over the stigma of herpes.  I don't disclose anymore.  it's not worth it.  I just pass it on and don't care any more.  Any other guys like me?

[drscorpio]

Virtually everyone is exposed to HSV1 or HSV2. It's just lots of people never have outbreaks. I had one outbreak 7 years ago, and none since then. As others have said, even if you have frequent recurrences, they can be treated.

It certainly sucks you had this happen your first time out. Try not to let it get you down.

giftme, that's a gorgeous piece of meat!

[seaguy]

CDC says 1 in 6 people in the US have herpes so you're not alone.

Edited September 4, 2014 by seaguy

[ToyBoy]

thanks for all the suggestions and responses guys... I have yet to try telling anyone on Grindr.  I kinda want to just to gauge what the typical response will be like but neither the bf or I are ready to play around yet.  so Idk why I would even say anything to anyone... 

[BBNudistBoyWhore]

I eat chococlate all the time and I have no out breaks and stress doesnt do it either, I've done alot of things to see what it does, and I never use meds, you really let the body take care of it and afterwards it doesnt affect you at all

[rawfuckr]

My doc keeps me on Acyclovir 3x daily. Haven't had an outbreak in years since starting that.

 

You may want to ask for valtrex. It's a different prodrug of acyclovir that has better bioavailability and it's only 1X day to prevent outbreaks.

[rawfuckr]

thanks for all the suggestions and responses guys... I have yet to try telling anyone on Grindr.  I kinda want to just to gauge what the typical response will be like but neither the bf or I are ready to play around yet.  so Idk why I would even say anything to anyone... 

 

Let's see. HSV seropositivity is so high 75%+ in gay men, that it's sort of pointless to tell people about it because they probably already have 1 or 2. Also, You can get 1 in the genital area, or 2 in the mouth, and otherwise. It just happens that 2 is often more in genitalia and 1 in the oral area. Also, if you take 1mg of Valtrex daily you will almost eliminate your viral shedding. Do that and there's no need of telling anyone.

[BBNudistBoyWhore]

well you know you don't need to take that, its poison you will do much better with cinnamon bark and/or oil as I'm even been doing it and it really kills it fast  honesty it fucking works, and try it before you say anything, as by doing it yourself will prove that it works, I'm symptom free since taking it in under a week!!!

[rawbottomPNP]

I just tested positive for anal herpes. From everything i've read, the recurrences become less frequent and more manageable as time goes on. I've never had a guy disclose to me that he had herpes and I imagine many of the guys i've bb have had it, so I feel no obligation to tell people. Just avoid sex when there is an outbreak.

[fillmyholeftl]

You can take a maintenance dose of anti virals, eliminating or reducing the occurance of outbreaks & alsothe degree of infectiousness.

 

I just tested positive for anal herpes. From everything i've read, the recurrences become less frequent and more manageable as time goes on. I've never had a guy disclose to me that he had herpes and I imagine many of the guys i've bb have had it, so I feel no obligation to tell people. Just avoid sex when there is an outbreak.