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I have used Pure for Men. I have some now. I prefer taking psyllium husk pills. They're way cheaper and get the job done. I can buy 500 of those for cheaper than I can buy 120 Pure for Men capsules. I just need a clean coochie - don't need someone to package flaxseed, chia and psyllium husk, mark up the price and sell it to me. I put chia in my smoothies by the way. I am not hating on Pure for Men. It's clever marketing.

I don't allow family and friends the freedom to ask what I do in bed. Occasionally a straight female friend will get too comfortable and try to ask and then I remind them that that's the equivalent of me asking does their man fuck them missionary or doggy or anal. The tires usually screech after that. LOL. If we are not going to be having sex, then you don't need to know what I am doing in bed.

@azndude: this might be the start of a long-lasting friendship or a relationship if you're open to that. It doesn't sound like he is going to be one of those tops out here with community dick that he's sharing with everybody. Let him talk and continue to open up to you. Connect with him. He might end up enriching your life in ways you can't yet imagine. Your goal might only be to get fucked and leave with a wet ass, but it sounds like he is offering you more than that. When you said he held you, I thought that was beautiful.

@anonfuck28: sorry this happened to you...truly I am. Here's a tip that I've learned from cruising. Get one of those super cheap neck wallets for ten bucks. Thieves can't get those without being obvious. Also, if you insist on taking your phone out cruising (which I think is ill-advised), then buy some knee-high sport socks and tuck it down in there along with your lube and poppers. Do not allow others to see you use your phone. Keep it tucked away. These phones nowadays cost close to a thousand bucks. Times are tough and people are desperate. I've seen video of people reaching through bus windows to steal them from tourists. I'd always heard they take them to another scammer who can wipe the phone, reset it and resell it. As for Paris in general, I've had my fun there. I've written about loads I've taken in Atlas Cinema (in Pigalle) but the darkrooms there smell like piss. Hell, I've seen guys piss in the darkroom. Gross. The saunas can be good too. But the Parisians can be very very picky. Guys flake a lot too. I lived there twenty years ago and let's just say, if you think flaking is bad now, it was just as bad then in Paris. I am fluent in French, so language isn't a barrier. As for other cities, I go to Berlin quite a bit. It's still good, but over the last 7-8 years, I also see it starting to decline. Some of the gay bars in Schoneberg have closed. The Biohazard parties still attract a lot of guys. The only challenge is that if you do the cumdump thing at the big sex parties, you really should go straight to a clinic when you get home. It's not unheard of to score TWO std's at those parties - the scariest being Hep C (thanks to tops going from hole to hole), which is not easy to cure because of the cost and access to the drugs.

He might enjoy teasing you but isn't ready to do anything just yet. If it were me, I'd sit outside a few more mornings. If he comes to the window with a hard cock again, just lick your lips. I find my next door neighbor (married with kids) very hot. When I first moved into the building, I crossed him in the basement and he gave me this look which I took as sexual. But I'm a scaredy cat and I know how freaking perceptive women are. I just had visions of being stabbed to death by his wife for sucking her husband off. Keep us posted on what you do.

I started out as a top, then switched to being a bottom, but would now classify myself as being somewhere between bottom and versatile. I probably would be fully versatile if there wasn't so much pressure in gay life to top. I have an average sized cock which is not so popular with bottoms - especially bottoms with loose asses. But that's ok. If I want to top, I just go to the bathhouse and try different asses until I find one that fits. God blessed me with a very big round bubble ass. I think I was meant to bottom when I see the reaction of tops when I bust it wide open.

Every gay man I know carries around a mental portfolio of all the shitty things other gay men have said and done to him. Facts.

1) Did you accidentally catch feelings for this guy? If you fuck someone you are very attracted to on a very regular basis, it's easy to get caught up. What really stings here? Be honest with yourself. Is it really the money or something deeper? 2) If he is having bareback sex with you, he's probably having it with everybody. It should make no difference whatsoever if he is being paid for it. Barebacking for free is not somehow morally superior to barebacking for money. And if you are worried about your health, then reduce the number of partners you have, get tested regularly for STDs, find a bf, or <gasp> wrap it up. 3) I don't think he owes you any answers. Besides you know the answers already. You weren't friends. You weren't dating. If you don't want to pay, leave him alone. If he asks why, tell him why. Simple. It's really not that deep. Free sex is great and he shouldn't have switched it up on you. But let's show the rent boys some love. If the dick is good and the price is reasonable, why sit online for hours, compete for dick and deal with flakes? You had sex 15 times with him for $40 and you mad? Girl, what's his number? I'm trying to see sumthin'. 🙂

I'd probably choose the second ad. Simple and to the point. The first ad, while quite fun to read, says I am pre-loaded (hence I might also have diseased cum in my hole). Just as there are tops that like a cummy hole, there are tops who simply do not. That's info you share if the top asks. The ad mentions HIV. which, any mention of, spooks the average person. I appreciate the attempt to explain the risk factors, but any talk of disease and medication doesn't get most people's dick hard. But major bonus points for inclusivity - i.e., welcoming all races. I'm curious if an ad that said you are willing to suck all dicks and willing to get fucked if the guy is drug disease free would work better. That shows you care about STDs and that not everybody can fuck. I was talking to a top not too long ago who explained to me that this "anybody can fuck me" mentality that some bottoms have is a major turn-off to him.

I like that we all have different takes on sleaze. For me, a guy is sleazy if he is giving his ass or dick to pretty much anybody who wants it - having lots of raw sex - and not giving a damn if he catches a disease in the process. Adding booze and drugs to the mix just raises the sleaze factor even higher. I tend not to make assumptions about a person's character if I see them acting sleazy. For me, it's definitely not tied to socioeconomic class/education. I think people who lead very repressed and stressful lives kind of almost need to sleaze it up to keep themselves from going insane. But I don't consider it sleazy at all to have a small circle of fuck buddies who service you. Those buddies might even see you as a fine upstanding individual. LOL.

Let's toss out the extremes for a minute - ie 1) never find a relationship because I'm a cumdump and 2) found a partner who is ok with it. That leaves a lot of people who are going to fall along the spectrum. I was in an open relationship for a while and we did whatever/whomever we pleased. There were some boundaries of course. But it was a loving relationship. I'm smart enough to know though that most guys are simply not going to be ok with settling for a slut. There's the health concerns (eg, I recall being a bit annoyed once when my bf caught something and I had to go and be treated as well - even though I was asymptomatic.) There's peer pressure. I may not want to introduce a known slut into my social circle or have them attend work functions. In my view, most men (sexual role is irrelevant) do not place a high value on something that is easy to attain. There's something about us that likes to chase or be chased and to possess or have access to what others cannot. It is deeply embedded in us. Although many cumdumps pride themselves on taking any dick, this sometimes turns off the owner of the dick because there's no challenge or prestige in fucking a piece of community ass. If bottoms are truly honest, they probably feel the same way about tops. I don't want my top fucking countless numbers of bottoms. I want to feel he values MY ass above others - much like the top wants to feel that I value HIS dick above others. I just got back from Berlin. I visit often - even have some regulars. It blew my mind when one of my tops said to me last week "Look, it bothers me that you only reach out to me once you are here. I want to know you are coming. When you contact me once you're here, it makes me feel like I'm your backup in case you don't find other dicks." YIKES. This whole time I was thinking "oh he fucks tons of bottoms so I'm not special to him". It does make me said when I see guys just give up on relationships because they want to be cumdumps or feel that they are never going to find anyone. This hookup culture is causing many of us to abandon real relationships that offer far more rewards than just sex. Some of us are going to end up very lonely in old age. That being said, if you want to be a cumdump, be the BEST cumdump you can be. No judgments here. But understand that you can't market yourself that way, and then wonder why no one is asking for a commitment. Make yourself vulnerable. Connect with people. No one will ever get to know your personality or grow to love you if all you show are ass dicks or pics with raw dick in your ass, right?

I think the orgasm from masturbation can be quite satisfying if there has been a long build-up to cumming. But oftentimes, I will decide oh I want to cum right now and finish up as quickly as I can. Big mistake I feel. I've never had the pleasure of cumming while being fucked but I know that my orgasms are very intense if a nice sized dick has massaged my prostate for a while before I get seeded. The very best feeling is when I continue to leak pre-cum hours after I have been fucked. I could even pass up cumming if I have been milked properly.

I am lucky enough to have a perfect fit. We don't live in the same city but we meet up in different cities. He is about 7 inches and thick. To make the sex even hotter, I use a specific butt plug when I know he's coming over. I thrust the plug in my hole to open myself up just before he fucks me so he can just sink his dick in. He moans like crazy when my ass opens up around his dick. When he starts to thrust, I milk his cock with my ass muscles - so much so that he dives in deep to keep from cumming. I then stop teasing him like that, take a hit of poppers and let him use my hole until he is ready to blow. When he cums, he stays inside to allow me to milk every last drop out of him. Even if I get in a relationship, I will not stop fucking him because we are...a perfect fit.

How about we skip the finding a replacement part and say if you are a no-show, you have to pay $25 (instead of $10) to attend a future party. And if you are a no-show a second time, you are permanently banned from the group.

I wonder if this experiment could work. Someone organises a party in a city. Max attendance is 15 (5 tops, 5 versatile, 5 bottoms). Donation of $10 required. Venue: someone's home or a hotel that rents rooms by the hour. If you can't make it, you have the option of finding a replacement or receiving a one month ban. Host should try to include a few new guys each time. The money collected covers the room, lube, paper towels, some drinks and light snacks. Leftover funds go to the host. Party starts at 8 pm and ends at 11 pm. Entry only possible from 8 to 9 pm. Bottoms have 10 potential partners. So do tops. Versatiles have 14 potential partners. If you don't like it, you're only out $10 - but you could end up giving or taking a few loads.

1. I like the instant feedback and knowing if someone is interested (or not) so I don't waste time. 2. I like being able to observe and figure out who is into what (top, bottom, versatile, oral, anal etc). 3. I like being able to switch roles. Online I am a versatile bottom but if I am in a topping mood, the anonymity of the bathhouse allows me to do that and I know I will get all the ass I want there. 4. If the weather is cold or dreary, it's very nice to hang out, enjoy the sauna and the steamroom - and get laid too. 5. I find the steamroom to be great relief when my sinuses are acting up. 6. In the bigger cities, bathhouses tend to stay open 24 hours, or at least are open non-stop over the weekend. You don't even need to book a hotel! 7. Some bathhouses offer full meals, which can be quite tasty and priced affordably. 8. Often you can get a nice non-sexual massage at a sauna on very short notice. 9. Because guys are moving between cabins, darkrooms, showers, steamroom and sauna, it's harder for them to be glued to their phones. 10. Hygiene: Most guys shower before and after sex - this and having paper towels available really cuts down on STDs.

I have another theory about the drop off in party attendance. Could it be PrEP? Before barebackers were sort of closeted/shamed and needed the parties to find other barebackers. Now you can look on almost any app and people are pretty open about using PrEP, which is clearly saying "I bareback". Therefore the only incentive to attend a party now may be for group sex. Personally I am divided on the idea of group sex - more potential partners, but also a bigger risk of catching something. I'd probably skip parties altogether if I had enough regulars.

Maybe the parties are being marketed via another channel? For example in Germany, I know of quite a few parties that never get advertised on BBRT. Posting a private party in Berlin makes very little sense to me because there are so many venues organising parties where you are almost guaranteed sex. Maybe guys are tired of no-shows and that's why the parties are disappearing? When I was in Barcelona a few months ago, someone on Grindr hit me up to invite me to a private party. So, I think the parties are still happening. The invitations are not being broadcast for all to see.

I think most guys these days use apps/websites to be entertained and not to hook-up. Maybe you score easily if you are a new visitor to a city or if you are one of the outliers (total top or super sexy bottom/versatile). Side note: I am also starting to think most verse guys are really just closet bottoms who don't want to be called bottoms because let's face it, bottoms are a dime a dozen. I just spent a few days in Berlin. Had a decent amount of messages online but when I went out to the bar, I got dicked DOWN. In fact I gave one of the employees at one of the bars my number. He called me the very next morning before 8 AM saying he was in the neighborhood. Fifteen minutes later I was getting plowed and loaded in my hotel room. So yeah, you can sit online and hope a fish bites your hook or you can go where there is a barrel of fish and enjoy as many as you can. One more thing, I have had good success at getting other visitors to a city to meet me at a bar and we hook up there. I do think that's kind of odd but I think it's all about leaving options open. If we don't like each other, then we've got plenty of other choices at the bar.

Interesting discussion here. I'm still firmly in the "ignore" camp. I recently had a guy write me a second time after I ignored his first message. I responded with "sorry not interested". He wrote back "why?". And I replied "I don't owe you an explanation." (I said that because I didn't want to insult his looks). My new rule now is, if a guy writes me twice in a short window of time, he's getting blocked. Just like I don't feel obligated to engage a telemarketer who contacts me, I don't feel obligated to go out of my way to make people I don't know feel good about being rejected by me. Getting a tepid "thanks" or an outright rejection from a guy is far harder on my ego than being ignored. No answer is an answer. I wish more of these chat sites had a way of making people "disappear" from my view and me from their view once it's determined we are not a match. I suddenly feel more empathy for women who have to deal with this type of stuff online and in public from men they are not interested in. It's exhausting.

The process of getting ready to bottom can be rather simple, but there are things we do that can make it very complex. It has five phases (at least for me). I know this thread is about getting the water out, but for the novices out here, I'd thought I'd go a bit deeper. 1 Diet: you need to observe how your diet affects your bowel movements. What things firm up your stool? What things make it messy? Are you taking fiber supplements? Yes Pure for Men is helpful but I've found that psyllium husk tablets are cheaper and work just as well. I take 3 to 6 a day depending on what I've been eating or if I plan a weekend of sex. 2 Timing of meals: it really does matter. We all dread having pigged out on greasy food only to have someone want to fuck us. But that's the breaks. Again this is something you have learn by trial and error. Maybe the meals should be heavier in the morning and lighter as the day goes on. 3 Use of over the counter aids such as Imodium: I only resort to this for weekends where I plan to be fucked over a 24 to 48 hour span. I don't think my body particularly likes it when I use Imodium but for me it seriously slows down all the traffic to my anus. But I've found I've got to take it anywhere from 4 to 8 hours before I plan to play. I've even been known to take it the night before. It really does make the clean out process a cinch. It's my insurance policy of sorts. 4 Cleaning out: the crazy thing here is that water is your friend and your foe. I'm not into fisting so I don't do those really long and deep cleanings. I control very strictly the amount of water I shoot up there, the pressure of the water I shoot up there, how long I hold the hose in there (eg 8 seconds) and how long I hold the water before evacuating (75 seconds). I use a Squatty Potty to release the kink in my bowels (or simply prop my feet up on something). Note: you have to totally relax and let the water run out. It doesn't work for me to force it out or spray it out. That relaxed motion of letting the water run out helps me avoid water getting trapped up there (along with propping my feet up). I douche several times until the water is clear. Usually when you see what looks like clear mucus come out your hole, you need to stop right there. 5 Testing: To make sure there is no water left, I use a butt plug while standing to fuck my hole. I usually stand in the tub while doing this in case the water that escapes is not clear. The final test is to close the lid of the toilet and actually sit on the butt plug while taking a hit of poppers. I really work my hole all over the dildo. Because my hole is relaxed and most open then, any additional water comes out. Then I'm ready to get fucked. So I say ALL THAT to say there are a lot of moving parts. Our bodies are different so this may not work for you. It's really about trial and error. If you have a mishap, try to understand why. And for goodness sake, if you mess it up, take it easy on yourself. Your asshole does have a day job. LOL.

Pride would keep me from occupying a sling for too long. The longer you are in the sling without anyone fucking you, the more your stock price plummets. If no one is approaching you, it seems to repel others and suddenly you are at risk of becoming invisible. Foot traffic near the sling drops off. I saw this guy hog a sling recently in Barcelona at a sex party. He wasn't a hottie (but not ugly either) but the guys simply ignored him after a while. While he lay there, tons of guys were fucking just feet away from him. I agree that the sling is a good way to advertise you're a bottom but let's not forget that it may not be where a top wants to fuck you. You could very well be missing out on a load in a cabin because you didn't vacate the sling. How's that for irony? LOL.

Interesting approach. (Straight) men typically do not like to be looked in the eye at all by other men unless they are acquaintances. It's as if you are questioning their masculinity if you do. So maybe by focusing more on the crotch and less on the eyes shows them you are not trying to dominate them. It's still worth exercising a bit of caution (even with the crotch watching) out here in these streets. I still think should any type of aggression or assault occur, the gay guy will be blamed for provoking the straight guy. That sucks of course but we as gays are still in the minority.

It's still open. I was there about a month ago. It's not my favorite place because your clothes stink terribly from the cigarette smoke. The darkroom is pitch black dark (and of course I was naughty by using my cell phone light to look around). It turned out that was important because there is a step down to get in the darkroom and it can be a little tricky if you don't see it. There are a set number of lockers for your belongings or if you want to strip down. I prefer S.L.U.T club in Hamburg way more than Talstrasse 8.

At home I use coconut oil. It's odourless and tasteless if a top wants to eat me out. It's solid at room temperature but if it gets too warm, it liquefies. Therefore I tend not to use it when I'm out. When I'm out, I use Pjur Back Door.