tallslenderguy

Thank you for your sweet and generous comments. From where i sit, you a thoughtful and insightful person and i'm both excited and grateful for your participation on this site. i love this community for similar reasons that you note. To me, both self awareness and the ability to articulate what we see, are largely acquired skills, i believe the more we exercise them, the better they get. This site provides an arena for us to exercise both in a relatively safe environment. i am truly happy you are here and participating, you enrich this community.

This isn't a black and white question for me. For me, it is about the breed, a Top leaving a part of Himself inside of me, inseminating me, hopefully impregnating me with Himself... 'breeding.' That doesn't always men a load. Sometimes it means altering my hole, Him making it His. Or sometimes He's a big mind fucker and He loads my mind and feelings with His seed, even a dildo or hand can 'load' me depending on the Top.

lol, good point, we eat additives and preservatives in our 'food' from an early age. What we eat is the primary cause of disease in the west today. You could always go the opposite direction and start eating a whole food plant based diet without added salt, oil or sugar. i'd love to hear your experience after you have used them, please let us know what you think?

^^This^^ (simply put). i too want to be aware and "participating." The appeal to me of stuff like hypnotism is the desire of the Top/Dom to control me. It's the power exchange, not the taking of power that captivates me. It's the, almost magical, ability that some have to get me to relinquish myself to them. There is a gray area for me, where i become aware after the fact that a Top or Dom has gotten me to do something or done something with me like stealth pissing my ass, and i am still bonded by Him. That still involves my participation, if not my outright permission at the time. That's a sort of risky act on the part of the Top/Dom, when they do it in hopes of finding a place in me to collar vs just doing it because they don't care about me. That is the biggest stumbling block that some in the D/s community seem to trip over with my type of sub nature, that submission is not carte blanche but rather an achievement, a demonstration of the Top/Dom's prowess.

my sense of you over time is that you are a real and honest person. i trust you and what you write, so this piques my interest. i've never been hypnotized, so far as i know. i had a FB who used what i retrospectively considered "hypnotic techniques" (massage to relax, blindfold to sensory deprive), but i think mostly He understood how to find my vulnerable places and capture them. my interest in hypnosis, and D/s in general, is the dynamic of molding and grooming. i have no desire to be used unscrupulously, i look for compatibility and relationship, the attraction and bonding of opposites at the deepest levels of who we are.

This is really hot to me, but in a more subtle way? I.e., having a Top who nonchalantly puts a diaper on me with no mention of "adult baby," but with the intent of molding me. i'm not into role play at all, i love real. But molding and grooming can be enormously Hot, especially when done in a subtle way.

For me, i love the stealth side of pissing. Love when guys stealth piss inside of me. i guess i don't qualify as "pig" because i don't really like my bed drenched in piss, but rather something more subtle, like discovering a Top has pissed in me or left His mark somewhere. i love it when He does it matter of factly, presuming it's appropriate. Hard to explain. i do love the idea of being diapered and not really forced to pee myself, but kept occupied by my Top with the intent of not giving me a chance to go to the bathroom so i finally have an accident. For me, my peeing has a humiliation element that is erotically charged when a Top controls it, sort of like Him controlling my orgasm. i feel about His piss like i feel about His cum, it's precious stuff. Complicated i guess.

You've got a gorgeous ass and pussy.

lol, well mine certainly has changed. One particular Dom FB made it His goal to permanently change it, which i realized after the fact because He was very patient, slow and methodical (changed it over about a year and a half). But honestly, it was already a pussy when He got to it, He did make it more permanently opened though. It's definitely more of a sex organ now than an elimination organ. I.e. it's much more equipped for receiving than retaining. i wouldn't say i'm proud of it, but it feels damned sexy.

Chia is insoluble fiber, they make a lot of goo lol, and i suspect create the "slick" environment many think of as "ass cum." Psylium is soluble, so yeah, you're doing some balancing. i tend to advocate for a whole food plant based diet (WFPBD), which provides nutritional value on top of the fiber, but in the absence of that, fiber supplement strikes me as a good thing. 🙂 Psyllium can be found on Amazon or Costco, cheaply, as is chia. A tablespoon of (freshly) ground flax seed a day is good too. Also fruit, berries and veggies.

Hell yes it makes sense! i really love and appreciate this insightful and open explanation of who and how you are. i wish more guys had such self knowledge and the ability to articulate their feelings, needs and desires. i don't relate to the desire/need for the physical or "rough" struggle. in fact, i have an aversion to perceived bullying or physical force. As best i can tell, it's probably a reaction on my part to being physically bullied and beat up as a kid. Looking back i realize i was 'sub' in nature from as early an age as i can remember. i sought out boys as friends who were 'dom' in nature and had crushes on several of them. i think that i must have thrown off signals and attracted dom guys in general. Of course, as children, none of us had much understanding or sophistication and we were all playing out "The Lord of the Flies." But even as a kid, i learned what worked and what didn't and learned to hide my sub side. As an adult, i practiced marshal arts and have a second degree black belt. The sub in me has always resisted bulking up with weights, so i'm a tall skinny guy, but i can break concerte with my hand lol, so it's sort of deceptive. The thing is, all my training is sort of deadly and destructive, so i'd never use it in a sexual context. But i got into marshall arts, in part, to compensate for being beaten up on as a kid. i didn't like it then and don't like it now. Weirdly, i enjoy sparring immensely, but find most of my joy in sparring as being a part of the dance with another guy, not winning by striking the deciding blow. i perplexed more than a few sparring partners when i praised them for landing a punch or kick on me while sparring (and i didn't give them that, it was full 'competition'). But that was all controlled with protection and pulled punches and kicks that can kill or cause severe harm. i've experienced a few guys who wanted to get rough during sex and have had to control myself from reacting with pent up childhood rage lol. In a contest of strength, i'd lose to a lot of guys. In a contest of actual fighting, i'd win because most don't have my training. Okay, that's physical. As noted, i identify as "sub" and know intimately how true that is. It really seems to be an intrinsic part of my nature as far back into childhood as i can remember. But it doesn't manifest in a physical contest of fighting, rather in an intellectual/emotional 'contest' of wills? i submit to seduction, but it is a contest and i don't just submit to anyone. So in that way, i really relate to this, but still from a bottom/sub perspective. i know versatile guys are different from me because of their nature their needs are met on either side of the equation, mine aren't. Differently, my ideal connection is with a 'total Top/Dom', the Yang to my yin. To me, at it's basic form, it's physics, the attraction and bonding of opposites.

fiber, fiber, fiber. (nerdy nurse here, certified through Cornell University on reversing and managing disease through diet) Enough soluble fiber can increase the "slick" coating that one might think of as "ass cum." What it is is fiber that becomes gelatinous when mixed with water in the body. It's also good for blocking/buffering absorption of sugar (which is why it's better to eat an apple that has fiber, vs drinking apple juice). Insoluable fiber adds bulk and helps with clean out as well as helping keep ones colon cleaner. Fiber is indigestible by our body, but it feeds our gut bacterial microbiome, it's vitially important to good health and, for aforementioned reasons, can reduce the need or extent when it comes to clean out.

i did a search for some study evidence re enemas, here's what i found: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3348737/ (i cut and pasted the pertinent part) "Enemas general act by causing rectal distention and sometimes irritation of the rectal mucosa. Although generally safe, enemas may cause serious damage to the rectum by misinsertion resulting in trauma to the rectal mucosa. Phosphate Enemas Commercially available sodium phosphate enemas are hypertonic solutions, which cause stimulation and some degree of macro and microscopic irritation of the rectal mucosa. Like most other OTC agents, there is little convincing evidence of their efficacy, mostly because of lack of well-designed trials. It is important to ensure that a patient using a phosphate enema can evacuate promptly as hyperphosphatemia has been described in multiple case reports, sometimes life-threatening in severity. Saline, Tap Water, and Soapsuds Enemas Saline, tap water, and soapsuds enemas also cause rectal distention, prompting evacuation. As a group, they are less irritating to the rectal mucosa if used in small volumes. With larger volumes, water intoxication has been reported with tap water enemas. Similarly, electrolyte disturbances have also been reported with larger volume soapsuds enemas. Saline enemas have been proposed as a survival technique in situations without pure freshwater."

i think they are!! But then, ironically (because i'm total bottom), i find a guys ass to be the most attractive part of the male anatomy. i can watch guys asses all day long, they fill me with lust. i think age has absolutely nothing to do with being able to wear a thong. You can be 75, and if You have the ass and body for it, go for it (and Yay You!). To me, You sound like you have the perfect ass to wrap in a thong, and i find thongs enormously sexy. And, please take pics and post them 😉

Re fallen angels procreating with humans. Yet another one of the bibles many contradictions. Words ascribed to Jesus imply that angels are sexless when he stated there will be no marriage in heaven. Kook stuff either way it's sliced. And yeah, 'the Ark Experience." So much of Christianity is showmanship. Thanks for the article link discussing chemical bonding, very interesting stuff. Though it's anectdotal, in my own experience i have gone from being selective to pretty much indiscriminate when it comes to mating with men. i have a general and universal affection for men that i didn't have initially. i've attributed that to age, but i wonder if it would be more accurately attributed to the quantity of guys i've fucked with? That the loyalty and commitment centers in my brain have become generalized? Maybe there is something to that, but i also note a continued desire for a more exclusive bond with a man vs many men. When i think about that, i consider relationship with one man to have a potential for depth that a hook up cannot have, and i desire that depth. In the context of incest, i still have dreams about my cousin who i had a crush on from about age 9 and i both lust after Him to this day as well as think romantically about Him even though there has been no contact with Him in decades.

Right. i didn't mean to imply that incest is an okeedokee way to reproduce. i'm curious which came first: religious rules or the discovery of genetic consequences to inbreeding? my guess is the latter since, at least Judeo-Christian religion has examples of family with family inbreeding, probably the most notable being Jacob (i.e. "the father of Israel) married his two cousins, Rachel and Rebecca. "Psychochemical bonding" is a fascinating thought, i'd be interested to read evidence of such between relatives, that certainly has implications for same sex relations. i like to parse out and distinguish between social conditioning and physical influence.

Depends for me too. i have a decided sub nature, but it doesn’t present the same to everyone but is in great part responsive. For me it’s as if i have all these collaring sites inside of me and some Tops/Doms find and know how to collar them and some don’t. my response is neither generic or universal, it is individual, but also somewhat dependent on Who i am with

Thank you for reading my book and thoughtfully replying. i agree with this. i think fear and the resulting immaturity it can cause through lost experience that brings depth and growth is a major factor when it comes to self disclosure. i wish i had more time to say more, but I’m at work and my break is over, so more later.

i only have white perspective. i feel i'm lucky to be gay, because i have at least experienced some form of prejudice, but only when certain people know. i feel rotten about the sickness of white superiority that some suffer from, and the general long term effects that has had on society in general. We might all benefit from being blind for awhile, sigh. i'm a student of WWII. It fascinates me because Germany, Berlin, were progressive, liberal places prior to Nazi's taking power. The movie "Cabaret" sort of demonstrates the change, "Bent" to some degree as well. What i am saying is, as LGBGTQ people, i feel we should know better than to be prejudice. Our current vice president would love to emphasize the 'vice" in his presidency. If given half a chance, he would enact laws against all of us for being gay, that would supercede color or race for people like him. There is a whole group of people who, if given enough power, would love to toss us into concentration camps. We really need to love each other and rid ourselves of the poison we may have had programmed into us from sick cultures. fuck

It's a fetish meeting site. Lots of D/s, etc.

What qualifies as "violent or rough sex?" What is it you are specifically looking for, and do you know why or is it just an emotional or physical need that is hard to articulate? i have certain needs for what i call "affectionate humiliation," but have learned to qualify it that way because some guys get into what i would call 'violent humiliation' which is different. It's a tough puzzle for me to unravel, so i am always interested when guys understand and can articulate what they need/want and the reasons behind their needs/desires.

i think a lot of people who consider incest immoral have that feeling from cultural conditioning, usually having religious roots. When i was processing out of my own religious upbringing, one of the questions i could never get a good answer on was: "Where did people come from?" i was raised believing that "God created Adam and Eve." That's it. If one ascribes to the story of creation as fact, it doesn't take much thought or consideration to realize that Eve and Adam's kids would have had to fuck and reproduce for the human race to continue. I.e., if, as the story goes, 'God' only created one man and one woman, the rest of the human race would have had to come from incestuous relationships.

Fundamentalist Christian. To me, "fundamentalist" anything is a cult. Any time one starts thinking they know what God thinks or wants, i think one has entered, and is living in, delusion land. i don't usually have a problem with people who believe in something or someone, but when believe ventures into knowledge, that's when those people feel they know who's naughty or nice, who's going to heaven and who's going to hell. i think that's when religion gets evil.

"prefer" doesn't fit for me, it really comes down to the chemistry and connection i have with the guy i am with. As far as i'm concerned, the best sex employs the mind along with the body, and that can happen with or without a blind fold. Getting fucked with a blindfold on can be very hot. As eastvillage notes, there can be a "disadvantage" to being blindfolded. The bottom is missing his visual sense, never quite knows what's going to happen next. Also, the bottom has no idea what his Top looks like, so appearance doesn't figure in for the bottom. Getting fucked while a Top holds your gaze can also be extremely hot, a silent message of ownership, dominance can be sent with that gaze. Both can be awesome.

i wonder what the cost difference is between PrEP and two HIV tests? Depending on how often you fuck, PrEP might be cheaper, as well as more protective.