tallslenderguy

i answered "no, would have to be open." Having said that, anythings pretty much possible, but i don't think it is sustainable in a healthy way for two sexually incompatible guys to try to force a closed relationship? Why not just become a monk and join a monastery?

"been told by my toilets...." ❤️ Good point about meds and vitamins. The two major clearing systems for the body are the liver and kidneys. The liver sends waste out the ass, the kidneys in the urine. E.g., NSAIDS (most over the counter pain drugs, except tylenol) get pushed out throughs the kidneys. The truth is, our bodies are in a daily battle to clear toxins from just the processed food we eat. Our bodies are not adapted to the Western Diet, it is the number one cause of disease in the 'the west.' 85% (conservatively) of my in hospital patients have diseases caused by what we eat. So yeah, what you eat definitely effects the taste of your piss.

i think this way too. The difference is, we're still guys and and most bottom guys seem to love to get fucked regardless of whether we have an orgasm, let alone an anal one. i was married (to a woman) for a long time. i was a virgin when i married, young, and didn't have a clue about a womans anatomy, g spot, clit or how to make a woman orgasm. i was pretty much just mindlessly fucking. A few weeks after i was newly married, my wife broke down in tears and accused me of not caring. i'd obviously given her orgasms, but not every time, but i was just lucky because i had no idea what i was doing. Her tears were a wake up call for me and from that day i began learning about how to make her cum and also training myself not to cum until she had. Turns out, as a sub bottom i was pretty good at giving pleasure lol, but there was definitely technique involved, and a fair amount of mind fuck too. Since divorcing and owning being a sub bottom, i've come to understand the position that many women are in, being dependent on their 'top' for orgasm, but i think it means something different to a guy than it does for a woman, even though we are both in similar boats.

Great topic. i've prolly had a few thousand cocks and i'd estimate about 97% have been anonymous, maybe 3% developed into fuck buddies? i too had a lot of success with CL, a lot more than any other hook up site. Sure, plenty of flakes there, but i got a ton of cum there. my CL hook ups were almost all exclusively anonymous breed and go though, my lying naked and ass up on my bed, door open, they come in and breed me and go. Being face down, i'd say i have never seen at least 3/4 of the guys who have bred me. my anonymous cock sucking experience is mostly in restrooms and Adult Stores through glory holes. More recently, i'm a little less enamored with glory holes, the primary reason being the wall is restrictive when trying to get all of a guys cock down my throat, plus, i love to cup and massage a guys balls while sucking Him, and that's not always doable through a gh. Most booths at Adult stores are pretty dark, so if it starts through a GH, ideally He'll want to come into my booth so i can get ever last millimeter of His cock.

Wow, fascinating thread, i need to wander out of the "general" forum more often. i too am deeply interested in the psychological side of sex. i'm sub bottom, but different from a lot of guys who identify as such (which is not to suggest one is better or worse, just different, part of the variety of life). i questioned my sub nature when when reading so many Dom and sub experiences and thoughts of others, until i started meeting Dom guys who i matched up with, guys who didn't want or fit with other types of subs, and began to realize the vast variety of D/s. i don't see myself as worthless at all. For me, a big part of the power exchange in a D/s dynamic is submitting my 'worth,' so to speak. i experience the power of a Dom when they elicit that desire and need within me to submit. i don't perceive meanness, force or bullying to be powerful at all. To me patience and self control are a demonstration of how much power a Dom has. Not only do meanness, bullying and force not evoke a submissive response, i've come close to decking a few guys who've tried it on me. i likely would have won if it had turned into a physical contest, i have a second degree black belt and some pent up rage against bullies lol. i got bullied a lot as a kid. i suspect now that was because some kids sensed my love for guys and my sub nature and took advantage of it, but neither they nor i had the sophistication at that age to employ grooming techniques. Though, looking back, my cousin was at the beginning of developing those kinds of Dom skills, and i still have dreams about Him to this day. For me, affectionate grooming is one of the most powerful things i have experienced in D/s relationship. i've written about my introduction to piss on a few threads on BZ, so i won't go into detail again here, but the Dom who introduced me to piss also turned me into a piss slut and His piss slut. Or maybe more accurately, He knew how to manipulate me and solidify that in me? To me, that is evidence of power and control. He didn't break me to get control, He groomed and manipulated what was there to control and mold me. We'd known each other and had been getting together for several months before He pissed in me after breeding me, but He had taken me through a process and by the time He pissed in me, He knew there was barely a speed bump left for me to become His piss slut (and He was right). It's a long intricate story. We got together about once a week for over a year before both of us had to move for various reasons. He had already made me His anal piss slut and was working on making me oral as well. We always talked, a lot, so He knew me well and i trusted Him. He knew that i was ambivalent about taking piss orally, i.e., i loved the idea of it, but was afraid of the actual taste of piss and how i might react. He never violated my boundaries, but He was expert at moving them to where He wanted them. i never experienced full on piss drinking with Him before moving, but He had started changing me. He had a lot of control over His own bladder and ability to piss, and to this day i'm not sure if this is accurate, but when i would be sucking Him and His cock was at the back of my throat, i think He was releasing small amounts of HIs piss at the back of my throat and into me. I'm not sure, because i never felt or tasted it in my mouth, or maybe some residual, but not enough to remove doubt. During and after, He also had that sparkle in His eye that He'd get when He had succeeded in Doming me.

knowing the little i do of you from reading your posts, i think you would really love it. A Mans piss really can be as powerful as His cum to me. Both are something His body makes and both processes of delivery can give Him pleasure. Being pissed on is pretty hot for the marking aspect of it. But to me, being pissed in is and internal marking that integrates Him into me. THe use of the word "impregnation" is accurate, not as in babies of course, but His piss is really something i absorb and it is evident that He has become a part of me when i urinate. To me, i'd love to have a Dom who always used me for His piss as a means of continuous marking/collaring. The psychological and physiological elements are very powerful to me.

The title of this thread got my attention because i have been stealth pissed a couple of times at an Adult Store while being bred through a glory hole. i'm practiced at retaining what a Top leaves in me, so on one of the occasions, i'm pretty sure i got fucked a couple of times after i was pissed in. my sigmoid curve seems particularly well suited for retention, which can make clean out a challenge, but works in my favor when being bred and pissed in because keeping what i get it pretty natural for me. i've encountered trash cans with piss in them, but have never been attracted to using it... which is maybe odd, because i will insert the cum from used condoms into my hole. In some ways, piss has more power to "impregnatate" than seman, so i value it as much. i can tell that i have absorbed a Tops piss because i can smell it when i urinate and realize that His piss has impregnated me and is mixed with my own and you just don't get the same evidence with cum (which is not to minimize cum, just to elevate piss). For some reason, i associate piss with the Man, so taking it from a trash can or urinal loses that connection for me. If i find it, it's sad and disappointing for me because it makes me wish i had been there to receive it from Him, but once its disconnected from Him, it's lost something for me. i guess it's the intent? i see piss and cum as a Tops way of leaving a part of Himself inside of me, of marking me... so if He doesn't do it, it's lost a big part of it's power for me? For me, finding it and using it feels to much like topping myself.

Yes, i am emotionally and erotically turned on by the idea. Honestly, It is a complex (and scary) topic for me though. You nail it for me when you say "penectomy" instead of castration. Most of the guys i know of seem intent on castration vs their penis. To me, the penis represents the male ability to penetrate and inseminate, which i associate with being Top or Dom. this stirs something deep inside me but when i think about it, keeping the testicles has a sense to it so as not to have to replace testosterone. To me, having the testosterone drive is part of me, i'm not a woman, so having the drive without having the Man ability to release it feels good to a part of me. The idea of having the penetrative ability gone makes me feel good if i associate it with a Man who wants me that way and wants to possess me. Also, i see myself as receptive to a Mans penetration and insemination (whether piss or cum), so i really like the extra hole he has, but honestly, making the asshole into a pussy makes more sense to me because then ii can retain and absorb what Man deposits, which wouldn't happen ties a pussy made from a penis. To me, if the testicles could be implanted, like ovaries, and hidden that would be ideal? Also, the idea of being able to cum from being penetrated fits for me because i love the idea of any orgasm or pleasure i have being dependent on my Top, especially from His penetrating me. To me, things like female castration that remove the ability to orgasm , don't make sense. To me, keeping that ability fully intact is idea, it's a question of controlling it. What appeals deeply to me is the idea of having a Top who controls both my orgasm and ability to orgasm, not removes it. A Top who redirects that drive and energy into my sub and bottom side.

absolutely. well, for me anyway. There's a few sides to it for me, one is minimizing my penis, i like a micro cage, it makes my penis look like a clit, and that turns me on. The second is keeping me from cumming keeps me horny and focused on my hole naturally, not all the hard to do since my primary sex organ is my hole, my penis is really a distraction that taken away keeps me horny or makes it so i am horny at the suggestion of a Top. For me, it's way more effective if a Top or Dom has put me in the cage and is in control, that adds a hole other dimension.

Depends. i'm sensitive to smells, so if a guy has bad breath, i'm dead in the water. That's actually true in general, i've had guys present their mouth at a glory hole and it smells like something died in there and wouldn't put my penis in that lol. Having said that, kissing is really intimate to me (and many others it would seem). Not unlike getting fucked, i can tell when a guy is connected (or not), to what He is doing. If it's mechanical, it does nothing. If it's forced, i close up. If He knows His power and is plying it knowingly, not over trying, expressing His passion and desire, my eyes will roll up in my head and i'll swoon. Fuck, i hate how girly that sounds, but fuck if it isn't true lol. And if i am on my stomach and a Top is fucking me and He kisses my shoulder, neck or ear, i will pretty much cream right then and there. i'll shudder and my pussy (and at that point it's a pussy) will contract and push into Him involuntarily.

i think you make some valid and important points here. While i may sort of understand how some may get to a place where they are turned on by gifting/chasing, to me it crosses a line into wrongness to give or seek disease. i have dedicated my life to saving sick and dying people and this deeply violates something in me personally, but socially i think infecting someone with a potentially deadly disease on purpose (especially without their knowledge), is socially criminal. Beyond that, there is the money aspect that Pozlover notes, which is absolutely a motivator when it comes to legislation. Then beyond that, so many forget, or are simply unaware of the extremist right and often (usually?) religious who want to find a reason to throw gay people in jail just because we're gay. Gifting/chasing could potentially lead to laws they can use to jail gays just because they hate gay people.

i'm a bottom and i'm sub, but not every Top, or even Dom connects with the sub part of me. D/s is simply not generic and it takes chemistry to connect. A bully Dom shuts me down at the very least, but they don't get any where near collaring me. But then, there are certain types of Dom's who see and know exactly how to Dom me, i suspect it has a lot to do with chemistry, and i have to literally bite my mattress or pillow to keep from declaring: "i love You." With those guys, there is no doubt, You are reading it right, that guy has definitely just made me His bitch and slipped His collar on me, it's an awesome, powerful thing.

For me, this was one of the bigger evidences for me in how we can really be 'wired' "bottom" or "sub"... which i suspect is akin to being more like a woman? i resist writing that because i don't see it as either or, black or white (i.e. Male or female). In my case, i am male with no desire to be female, but i suspect that my bottom, sub nature is a female component of my being a male that makes me different than a heterosexual, or a Dom or Top gay guy. i knew how to give her pleasure or make her cum just like a bottom or sub knows how to give another bottom or sub pleasure because he can relate. What eventually frustrated her was she too could instinctively sense that i was sub, bottom, that i was like her vs being her opposite, chemistry match that would naturally attract and bond. After divorcing and learning to accept and experience my own nature, i really cam to understand her position. It's different, because i still have maleness that she didn't have. For insrtance, a female Dom with a strap on might work a little better, but still wouldn't work with me. There are things a Man has that are a match to my needs and, apparently, vice versa. pretty damned awesome.

This has become a great discussion to me on several different levels. i'm continually fascinated by our various wiring and the terms that we've come up with to try and explain what we think and feel, who we are. Anal orgasms aline with my nature (or vice versa?). i love the idea of being dependent on my Top for pleasure, the dynamic of control. And i get it intimately. i was married to a woman for 31 years. i learned early on how to give her multiple orgasms and manipulate her pussy and clit, because by nature i was very much like her. Despite all the pleasure, she actually would get frustrated with me because i was so focused on her pleasure and not my own. But i'm sub bottom and my "pleasure" was derived the same way her's was.. by being there as a receptacle for a Mans pleasure. It's a little strange and humiliating to me (in that good, erotic way) that i can identify and relate to a woman in this, the deep desire for this kind of relationship with a man.

we seem very alike in this. i don't think i have experienced and anal orgasm? i've cum from my penis by being fucked, but i'm guessing this is different from what is being described as an anal orgasm. Mentally and emotionally, i'm a receiver, ideally would never touch my penis on my own (though i do), i'd rather be able to be sexually like i have the equivalent of a male "pussy" and "clit." That works for me psychologically too. The only times i am satisfied by a guy making me come using my penis is if He is relating to it, not as a cock or even a penis, but something only a bottom sub has, so "clit" works for me. The mind fuck of Him believing He is stimulating my "clit" and that i don't have a cock or penis is an integral part of it since my mind and emotions are very engaged in sex. i am wondering if this is why i have not experienced an anal orgasm? That i am to focused on trying? Or maybe i haven't done it right? i've had some awesome and long fucks before and felt like i was close on many occasions, but wonder if i have prevented it from anticipation? i do have a fuck machine, is it a matter of just going long enough? How do i get one? i feel like if i just experienced it, id be able to train or at least know how it's done?

This will prolly be a different, but similar in many ways version of what rawsatyr wrote. i came out of a 31 year marriage (to a woman) and out of a conservative religious culture. i think heteronormative "rules" have a lot of roots in religion. Having deeply analyzed those "rules" and processed through them, i've developed what i believe is a healthy response to any rules: "where did the rule come from and why is it a rule?" Most of us have grown up in heterosexual dominated culture. That's changing, there are gay people out there now who may have been raised by two moms or two dads, trans, etc. etc., or something non traditional, but even those relationships may be colored by heterosexual and/or religious culture. For me, a long term, dedicated relationship is more about emotional loyalty than it is about sexual monogamy. This is not a perfect analogy because i think that sex has much more to it than eating, but i see sex as a natural necessity, like eating. Monogamy is sort of like saying that partners can only eat together and only the food each has prepared for the other. my personal desire for a ltr type relationship is more about depth. For me, anonymous hook up sex is like fast food. Some tastes better than others, it's quick, comparatively easy to get and it helps with hunger. A ltr has the potential of elegant, nutritious dining, so to speak... but it can also be like a constant diet of McDonalds. In other words, a "serious" relationship isn't a thing in and of itself, it is what you and your partner make of it. i can see a ltr going either direction (monogamy or not), that is not central to a relationship for me. What is central is mutual and ongoing care and dedication to each other. Sexually, it represents an opportunity to go much deeper into emotional and mental fucking that just can't happen is a quick hook up. That can go either direction when it comes to monogamy. For instance, i can easily see myself in a relationship with Top or Dom guy who gets into whoring me out, and it wouldn't simply be about getting lots of cock for me. For me, i would relate to the experience/s as still being fucked by Him, because He would have the control. i wouldn't have a problem with Him fucking others, i'd have trouble with Him hiding or lying to me (or vice versa) about anything because, to me, a ltr is about loving and accepting the person for who they are. If they felt the need to hide or lie, it would be because they felt the threat of rejection. Remove that threat, and it becomes a non issue (and i know guys who have found this). To me, if we love each other, we'd take joy in each others enjoyment, not try to restrict it. We'd be allies in helping meet each of the others needs and desires. i think it's a mistake to assume we can be everything a person needs or expect that from another. i think that false idea ends up creating scenarios of cheating and lying to maintain the illusion that the other is everything. If we don't have that expectation in the first place, there's not an expectation to be disappointed or failed.

i'm answering again, my original answer went off on a tangent, idk, just not satisfied by it. Also, i went in search of this question, or one similar, because of my continuous failure to find "love." (read: "a ltr connection with someone special, that doesn't necessarily translate into monogamy for me, but i don't rule it out). i think i come closest to being a breeding slut because i haven't found love. But, i'm not sure, i might qualify as breeding slut even if i did find love? i can't count the number of times i've thought i found love, only to have the guy flake on me. i think a lot of that sort of thing happens online, that it's just so easy to flake with online meets. i've had guys profess love and that they couldn't believe the connection, etc., etc., only to have them suddenly change their mind. i'm a huge optimist, i never seem to give up, but i've noticed myself becoming frayed at the edges. i know i fuck around because that's all i have and it's better than nothing. For me, it's about the desire i have for a guy and His desire for me. my own particular sub/bottom nature feeds off of my Top/Dom, it's sort of a reflection of Him. It's mental and emotional for me and it runs deep. A frustration i have with simple slutty breeding is it's near impossible to make those kinds of deep connections in a hook up.

i understand what you are talking about, but i don't relate. For me, the mental part of dominance supersedes the physical in power. If the physical has any sort of bullying flavor to it, i shut down (not give in, but become closed, inaccessible) or outright rebel. But i do get the wrestling, sparring flavor of what you are describing, it's just transferred to the emotional/mental for me. The word "contempt" hits the nail on the head for me, except i don't "get it." i understand, but i don't get (read: "accept") anyones contempt for me or how i am. For that matter, i don't accept anyones contempt for another. To me, contempt is a delusional hiding place and it prevents connection. i want/need to connect with guys, particularly in a D/s, Top/bottom chemistry. It seems to me that showing contempt for the guy you are using for gratification is a deep expression of self contempt and a rejection of the very thing that draws us together. So, i'm inclined to think that it's not so much the spit but the attitude behind the act that has the effect of turning me off. It's a fascinating line, because i am totally collared by some forms of what i deem "affectionate humiliation." The key for me is the "affectionate" part. i think the affection is the Dom's or Top's way of acknowledging His own need and desire, so the connection happens.

Something i wonder when i read "nor do i feel left behind or oppressed when politicians or religious people say...," is how old are you, and what kind of culture did you grow up in? Some here have witnessed a cultural revolution when it comes to guys having sex with guys. Even as recently as 1998, i was arrested and charged with a felony because i asked an undercover cop if he wanted to fuck me. It was VA and even in '98 a special unit of "vice" cops existed who purposely pretended to be gay and cruising in order to entrap gays. i was charged with a 100 year old law that made it a felony for two guys to fuck. The attorney general at the time, Bob McDonnell (who later became governor and was indicted for being a criminal), was a virulent anti gay and had told his attorneys to go for the jugular. i grew up in an era and religious culture that stated homosexuals were going to hell, or at best, were broken sinners that needed to repent. Medical books published before 1973 labeled homosexuality as a "disorder." As a kid, i remember going to the library to try and learn about how i was feeling about guys, and the idea that i was "sick" was just reinforced. i was an unsophisticated kid and had no info or support to the contrary. Sure, i eventually processed through all that shit, but it took time and i married a woman and had kids in the process. my former wife and kids remain religious and disowned me when i came to a place of honesty, openness and acceptance about my sexuality. I remember a time when the extreme fundamentalist christian religious wanted to make laws to put people in prison for having same sex sex, and i don't doubt for one second that they still would given the opportunity. Don't get me wrong, i have overcome my oppressive cultural upbringing, but it wasn't easy. Think Stockholm Syndrome. Funny story, i went to the farmers market on PRIDE weekend and there was a PRIDE rally. There was also a group of religious right folk with their posters and megaphone telling us to repent and that we are all going to hell. i raised my hand an flipped them off as i walked by their booth, felt really good.

Great question/topic. For me, there's stuff that is deeply entrenched in my mental and emotional identity, other things that are boarder line, and other things on the other side of the line. Spitting in the mouth is one of those things on the other side of the line for me. I.e., it's hard for me to imagine liking or wanting it. i was at a gay resort a few months ago and a guy hit on me pretty hard. i was sucking Him and He said He wanted to spit in my mouth... i demurred. i can count on one hand the number of times i've said "no" to a Top in my life. He did ask though. Something that turns me off completely is a bully, and while He had a sort edginess to Him, He wasn't a forceful bully... which has the effect of opening me up and so the seduction can happen. For some reason, He wanted me to take His spit into my mouth and i could see the want in His eyes, which always turns me on. i never see a Dom/Top's need or want as 'weak', just the opposite, i see their willingness to be vulnerable as courageous and strong. So, i'm seeing this look in His eyes as i am looking up while sucking Him and He tries a second approach... He withdraws His cock from my mouth and spits on His cock. Not in a forceful way, just sort of like asking again, and i took it. "Training?" it would seem. Same with throating a large, thick cock. i used to have an aversion, but encountered a Dom who "trained" me, not by force, but by encouragement and praise. He was insistent and persistent. i don't think there was any question in His mind that i'd take His cock exactly as He wanted, but the way He went about it opened me up. i was gagging (i hate to gag), my eyes were tearing (and He kept having me look in His eyes) and my nose was running from it, yet He kept telling me how well i was doing and how proud of me He was and switching it over to how much i enjoyed it and how proud of myself i was. By the time He was done, i adored Him and since then pretty much threat every cock i get now. i'm guessing, if done by a skilled Top, they can use my sub side to get whatever they want, but some things are harder to get to than others for me.

okay, that makes sense. Interesting the things we attach too emotionally? i've always stayed sort of skinny, not lifted weights to get bigger muscles. i did martial arts and yoga, but purposely didn't get the more muscled body i associate with Dom or Top. i can see how culturally, smoking a cigar is more of a Dom type thing to do.

lmao. Ditto. i recommend "Being and Nothingness."

i have a Dom/Top guy chatting me up and interested, He is very into leather and cigars and i'm not all that familiar with either. i sort of get leather, but the cigars part from the Top's point of view? Yeah, what others have written here makes sense, but it doesn't seem to explain the strength of the fetish? Of course, that might be said about any fetish, i.e., it's hard to understand why we have a strong emotional attachment to something? It seems to me that cigars have a phalic element , but it's hard for me to reconcile a Top sucking on a big fat cigar, that seems like something i'd want to do as a bottom lol. The other thing is i'm in health care and about 25% of my patients suffer from diseases related to tobacco. i know and understand in great detail the damaging and weakening effects tobacco has on the body, so it really bothers me that the image that smoking is powerful is still out there.

[laughing] i know, right? This to me is Madison Avenue at its finest, the ad is so well written, and deceptive. A properly shaped cucumber in the right hands, or skilled fingers could have similar effect. The point is hitting the prostate and how it's done. i too have had a few Tops who knew how to do that. Of course, it's easier to get 40 euros than it is to find a permanent Top. 😉

Would someone please explain this one to me? i did a quick search here and on google, but didn't really find an explanation of cigar fetish? i don't understand what it entails?