tallslenderguy

The gay community has some fascinating variety, eh? i don't think there is a "right" or "wrong" approach to this, but individual. Honestly, it comes across as insecure to me, like the Top is threatened if they are upset by a bottoms hard penis. i realize that my own emotional response is just that, "my own." There's something in me that is aroused when a Top makes the differentiation between me the receiver and Him the penetrator... but i'm all bottom with some sub thrown in. There are so many variations of guys taking cock. Many are versatile and like to breed too, and they do indeed have a cock to my way of thinking. And, there are plenty of bottoms who don't identify as sub, and prolly most of them think of themselves as having cocks... infinite, awesome variety. i don't think we are binary and wish we'd resist the centricity of putting everyone in the context of our personal needs and desires. i should have clarified that the guys i often approach are more Top with some Dom thrown in. i love bottom and versatile guys. Fuck, i love men. but i don't approach either for sex because i know myself and know personally i crave a particular type guy and my favorite is one who doesn't think i have a cock. But i want everyone to know, that's me, not a right or wrong way of doing this. 🙂

A "useless, flaccid, soft" penis is not something i want to confer on myself, but an effect that my Top has on me. i've had a few Tops who turned me on so much with Their attitude and words that i got rock hard, and they didn't miss a beat saying: "... isn't that nice, your clit is engorged at the prospect of being bred." In their mind, i don't have a "cock," so whether or not it gets hard is immaterial, because soft or hard, it's never a cock and always "useless" as a penetrative organ. Mind fuck. Matter of fact assumption on their part that i simply don't have a cock, it doesn't matter how things look. Total confidence on their part makes what is between my legs a non issue so matter that appearance of things. And it works, my brain and emotions go right along with His power and control.

i'm a critical care nurse and my experience has conditioned me. i'm aware, but it doesn't really matter. Last time i was in Palm Spring i hooked with a guy who didn't have legs and His cock had been refashioned, but it still worked just fine. He was Top and we'd arranged an anonymous scenario where He was going to come in my open door and breed me... which is a pretty common scenario with me. When He got to the hotel, He needed help getting His chair over the threshold of the room, so anonymity was no longer a factor. We ended up kissing, which i rarely do, but He was definitely kissable to me and i ended up kissing and touching Him everywhere, including what was left of His legs (about 4 or 5 inches). He was hot and passionate and so responsive to my mouth and touch, i got very turned on. At one point, He said that most people would not touch his legs and that it felt good. We talked openly, and i asked if i didn't know. i prefer guys who don't consider themselves 'perfect' because i know that i am not. i don't even try when a guy has an attitude that they are way too hot, i want mutual need and desire.

He may like the idea of owning and controlling your hole, watching and controlling who ever breeds His hole.

Damn yes. i met a guy on CL when i lived in KY. He became a FB and we got together about once a week for a year and a half before we both moved away. He introduced Himself as liking to give massage and asked if i wanted one. We wrote back and forth for awhile, and He had me totally wanting it. Last minute He dropped that he wanted me waiting naked and blindfolded on my bed, ass up and door open. This wasn't a stretch for me because that's how the ad read that i'd placed, except for the blindfold. Though the words were never used, He was my first long term experience with a Dom. He used massage, the sensory deprivation of the blindfold and an ongoing monologue to get me into a suggestible place, and He was really good at it. It was about 6 months before i realized what He was doing, but i was hooked by Him from the start. He was very patient, slow and purposeful and always got what He wanted. His long term goal was to "remold my hole into a puaay"... He did that too. i don't know for sure, but i think He was purposefully using hypnotic techniques.

i fucking love this advice, the only thing that would make it better for me is to ask your Top to give you a ruined orgasm to help train and condition you to meet their desire.

Are you saying that You in particualar are turned off by guys with wives/girlfriends? Why is that? Pretty much opposite to what the OP feels. Personally, i can be attracted to a Bi guy or gay... not sure about wanting a straight guy though, because that seems conflicted, or just physical at best?

interesting question. i confess i love this dynamic with a Top where they minimize my penis. One way i and certain Tops have found around this is they never refer to what i have as a "cock," it's either a generic "penis" or some have called it a "clit." "Clit" has a deeper psychological effect (for me anyway) and it makes the distinction, even though i am not the least bit fem... actually not being "fem" makes it even more powerful for me. Talk about penetrating me and some forms of affectionate humilation get me hard as a rock, being penetrated makes me soft though and talk of me using my penis never gets me hard. So, the psychology behind calling it a "clit" (for both parties) is it's little, not a cock and refers to a penetrative part of anatomy. Yeah, it gets engorged when excited, but it's an encorged clit, not a cock. it gets excited for a whole different reason because it really isn't a "cock."

my sigmoid is pretty shallow, so most guys who breed me end up breeding my sigmoid, and once it's there i can keep it. If it doesn't go that deep, i am still able to somehow pull it in, not sure how that works, but i don't leak. i think leaking pussy is sexy as fuck, but i also hate the thought of losing any of a Tops cum, so i guess i've just learned how to retain and am lucky my sigmoid is shallow for retention. Butt plugs. i've never considered butt plugs to be a way of keeping cum or piss in. For me, the effect of a butt plug is mostly psychological. i like if a Top uses one on me for whatever HIs reason may be, but i don't use them on myself as a rule. When i read that what you wrote: "...use a butt plug, but that doesn't feel good and i dunno how you walk and do anything with one in," it immediately made me wish for a Top who'd put a butt plug in me... for exactly the reasons you state. For me, the butt plug would become a collar and leash for me that i'd associate with the Top.

What CumBustion said. i use an 18" and it helps, but it hasn't completely modified me. All of us are a little different down there. i happen to have a fairly deep curve, so hitting it meets more resistance and can cause more pain. For me, the advantage of having that deep curve is retention, i can hold onto a Tops cum and/or piss without losing it...and i love to keep and absorb what a Guy puts into me, so i like that. It also makes it more of a challenge to clean out initially, A lot really depends on the Top. Some Tops are either ignorant or don't care. If they have a long enough cock to hit my curve, i just sort of squirm and take it. Other more experienced or knowledgable Tops love to pop that "second hole" and love the process of opening and getting in to fuck deep.

mine is definitely changed ever since a Dom Top made it His goal to change it, which i love that i can associate it with Him and His desire. mine is a slit and not a pucker anymore, but not a gaping hole (though i love the way that looks on guys). Unlike some, i like lube, lots of lube or cum, either works, but i love sloppy and a noisy, sloppy sounding hole when any Top fucks. i love it when a Top loads my hole up with lube if it's not already sloppy with cum. One of my favorite feelings is the since of immediacy i get when i have to go to the bathroom. i don't leak, but i have to squeeze my inner muscles sometimes to hold stuff in. i like it because it reminds me that my hole is no longer designed primarily for waste removal or retention, but is designed for easy access, penetration and fucking. To me, that since of urgency is my body reminding me that it wants to be empty and ready for a Man to penetrate. it's also got a little bit of a humiliation edge to it that's hard to put words on, knowing any guy can look at it and know that i love to be a place for a Man to penetrate and release His pleasure into.

i know, right? "Verbal" doesn't have to be mean or abusive. The most effective Dom i have ever sucked Dommed me by continually coaching me to take HIs massive, thick cock deeper into my throat. He was totally positive, but relentless, saying things like: "that's it, just around the curve, deeper...." When i would do it, He'd gush "Good boy, I'm so proud of you, arent't you proud of yourself?" Like He was talking to a little kid or a pet dog, it was subtle humiliation. He had me in an awkward positon, but had me look Him in the eyes. i was tearing from gagging, and my nose was running from it too. He'd ask me questions He knew i couldn't answer with my mouth full, but still expected some type of response. The overall effect was i adored Him. He had me so verbally Dommed, He collared my inner cocksucker and made me HIs.

i think the term "faggot" is fluid. For me, that fluidity has boundaries, for instance, it can only refer to a guy who takes cock, not who gives it. To me, a faggot is a guy who needs/wants to be physically, emotionally and intellectually penetrated by another guy. A faggot is the receptive one in a gay or bi relationship (i use "relationship loosely here, even a hook up is a brief "relationship"). Thus, the fluidity. For instance, a versatile guy may have times when he is a faggot whereas a total bottom who would be fine if he didn't even have a penis is getting more towards "total faggot." Anyway, that's how i see it.

i think it’s more a mental than physical phenomenon. I don’t think it depends on the bottom as much as it does the Top. A sweet ass is a thing to behold, and feel, but i believe most of this has to do with the mental and emotional disposition of the Top.

my previous thoughts were thinking out loud, not absolutes, just thoughts. Thinking more about it... i was married for half my life, most of my adult life, to a woman. We had sex, lots of it. i'd be lying if i said i didn't like it, but i still identify as "gay." So, maybe i'm off on my analysis of what constitutes "gay, straight and bi"? When i divorced, i thought i might be bi, because hell, i'd functioned well enough sexually with a woman for most o fly life. Before i married, my sexual attraction was pretty strictly towards guys, but it wasn't an option in my religiously conditioned brain and emotions. i did date a few women who i considered attractive, but when it came to sex, it was a no go for me. i didn't want it. i consider my marriage as sort of like straight guys who go to prison and have a romance with a guy, it's all that is available. For me, my "prison" was my beliefs that being gay was wrong. Once i processed through that, turns out, i'm gay lol. i even dated a trans person (FtM) and though i totally cognitively accepted this person was the guy he identified as, there was just something personality wise that reminded me of a woman and that turned me off sexually. i've had prolly a couple of thousand guys, but only ever had one woman, so i guess i do qualify as gay, but i did "try" sex with my former wife a lot more than once lol, so it may be that a straight guy can indeed have multiple sex encounters with a guy? idk. what's the attraction then and what qualifies him as still being straight and not bi?

i think this can be a hard one to nail down with a simple lable like "gay" or "straight." If we're being strict about the meaning of words, if a guy practices sex with males and females, he's bisexual. If he's "never had a boy before" he might be gay, straight or bi and still figuring it out. If you're his first boy, it's a 50/50 chance of which way it will go. If He likes it and wants to do it again, he's at least bisexual. If He decides, whoa, wtf, this is what i have been missing my whole life, he may be gay. If He tries you and just can't finish, or decides after that it was "meh" or even "gross," chances are he's straight. Honestly, i think the latter is gonna be pretty rare to get as far as penetration and unload if there is no attraction at all? It doesn't make any sense that He's gonna be able to get it up and slide it in without being turned on? i'd guess that you are looking for specific traits in a guy that you associate with being straight? Because by strict definition of terms, once He's fucked you the second time, he's no longer straight lol. The first time can be chalked up to giving it a try, but really, i just don't see a straight guy doing it more than once and keeping the title "straight?" what he said

Wow, this is a fascinating thread. It seems to me anyone in this situation should go for couples counseling to figure out the why's behind it and in order to determine a course of action. i don't think it's a healthy relationship, but all that has pretty much been said. What did strike me is that the rule of monogamy would be invoked. I don't think "monogamy" applies in a relationship that has no sex, that's a platonic relationship.

Guys like sex, you'll always be able to get some. i don't believe it's a question of age, even though that's a factor for some. There are many factors that influence getting sex, among them are looks, age, population, environment to list a few. One of the bigger impediments that i find is not just the Tops list of qualifications, but the bottoms. I.e., do you have them? From what you have said, you do. For instance "condoms used for anal" is a deal breaker for 99% of the guys on this site. Your profile says you are looking for "muscled," so for many reading that, that would leave them out. We have little control over another guys qualifications, but we do have some. But we have complete control over our own qualifications. The more you have, the less sex you will get.

lol, yeah that happens, eh? When i go to the gay resorts in Palm Springs i sometimes encounter a stubborn shower head, all the resorts were made in the 50's it seems, and some of the original plumbing is in place. i've always had success, so i'm guessing the hard to budge shower heads are the exception? i doubt they are permanently afixed, prolly just rust or a really tight hole.

I’m a little different with this, I’m pretty sub and the way I’m wired, I get off most on doing what my Top likes. I like the way I feel in panties on all sorts of levels, but what makes it work for me is if my Top asks or wants me to wear them. I associate stuff like that with a Tops desires, so as much as I may like wearing them, doing so independently feels like topping myself. My own individual twist I guess

I travel with a shower hose attachment, pliers and a shower shot. The hotel graciously provides the shower. It’s a 5 minute job to take the existing shower head off and substitute your attachment, then replace before you leave. If you’re staying a few days, you need to remember to switch it out before maid service ( unless your maid is a hot guy).

Okay, waking this thread back up, and got distracted ^^^ i did a search on here for "waxing" and this seemed to be the most recent thread with some discussion on the topic. i have a naturally hairy ass, and as mentioned earlier in the discussion, i go back and forth about hair removal. Personally, i get really turned on by hairless, smooth, on me and other guys... especially the ass. But, as also noted, i'm more concerned about what my Top likes, but not reopening this to try and figure all that out. Waxing. i bought a wax pot on Amazon, got the French wax, etc.., and have tried it a couple of times after watching some youtube how to vids lol (i love youtube, you can find "how to" anything there). Turns out waxing yourself is pretty challenging. So is shaving, and i have a yoga background. i do like the results better, no prickly stubble to worry about or razor rash or ingrown hair... but i haven't figured out how to do it without having to go over and over and over a place to get all the hair? Anyone else do it yourself? Please share your methods and discoveries?

"loved" this pic in the reaction section when i first saw it, but seriously, you deserve some sort of award or trophy for having one of the worlds most beautiful holes. i'm pretty much a total bottom, but i'd breed that... if i didn't die of excitement first.

i'm one of those guys that vets my hook ups. Yes, i confess, i'm one of those who will do lots of back and forth emails. i'm trying to do two things: one, i mentioned earlier in this discussion, i'm trying to connect emotionally and mentally with the guy. Two, i'm trying to make sure he's a Top. i've even taken to explaining in some of my profiles that i love bottom and versatile guys, but they won't work chemistry wise when it comes to sex. i push pretty hard and directly in the pre-hookup discussion to make sure this guy wants nothing to do with my penis. Still, some guys don't read profiles?!? and a few slip through, no matter how clear you are, As to "picky," that can be a two edged sword. i don't have a lot of regrets, i'm pretty at peace about my life. But, i do wish i had learned at an earlier age what i know now, and that is that fucking is about a lot more than i realized when younger, that it's not just about the body or looks. Sure, those are factors, but i put much less weight on them now. i've had some awesome sex with guys i never would have dreamed of spreading my legs for when i was younger. i seriously do not have a huge problem finding Tops, it's still work, but my only qualifiers are they want to fuck (or be sucked) and they are able to do so. That's it. If they can get it up and get it in, they qualify. So to bottoms who have a hard time finding Tops i'd ask: "will you take any guy with a functional cock?"

i discovered i had a pussy at a very young age, 7 or 8, way before i discovered my penis sexually. A neighbor boy, who i had i crush on, took me inside His house one day and showed me and enema nozzle and explained in gleeful detail what it was used for. Cognitively, i knew nothing about sex or being gay at that age, but emotionally, He was probably the first dom in my life. And looking back, i can see how He had a dom nature, even though immature, and i had a sub nature, also immature and we just naturally attracted to each other. As soon as i got home, i found our enema and he nozzle and inserted it into my rectum associating it with him. After that, pretty much anything i could think of went into my hole. i had no idea what i was doing, but i was unknowingly training my hole to receive. i was religious and resisted having sex with a guy till i was 27, but by then i had a ton of experience taking it up the ass. i didn't own an actual dildo or plug till way later after i was divorced, but my hole was well trained by then. When i was in my twenties, before i had my first cock, i had one particular tool at work that i penetrated myself with. i worked at a high school as a maintenance person and my office was private, in a mechanical room with a large collection of tools. There was one solid metal tool, a pipe thread cutting tool , that was my favorite. The pic i linked is similar, but the newer ones are smaller than the one i had. There was more of a ball shape at the end that was about 2 inches in diameter. the shaft about and inch and a half across? It was solid stainless steal and i'd put the cutter side in a vice and then impale myself on the ball and shaft. I was probably more open than most guys when i took my first cock lol. i almost never use dildos now because emotionally it just feels to much like i am topping myself, but it's rare that i need one now to prep myself for cock. i estimate i've had between a thousand to two thousand cocks, my hole has a life time of conditioning to receive. Mind you, i'm not like some fisters who have size trained, i bow to them when it comes to gape, but as far as natural conditioning to take cock... i'm there. Every time i have to 'go' , i have a particular sense of urgency because my hole is no longer built to retain. i have to use my cock squeezing muscles to hold it in (good exercise lol). It's a daily reminder that i have a pussy for cock primarily and a hole for waste removal secondarily.