DCWildBtm

I'm about 1/2 way through and already I'm wondering where we can find your other writings . . . would love to read them. I'm sure they're just as awesome as this one promises to be! Great work!

Just catching up on this topic, and I have a question for you, @BlackDude, is your point #3 directed at me? If yes, please read on, if not, then please disregard. I'm going to continue writing, because to me it's clear who you were directing #3 at, and it's me. And, before I dive into why I think it is about my post in this thread, let me preface it by saying that I don't hate you and although I haven't read everything you've posted on here I find it hard to believe that if I were that it would leave me "hating" you. I hope that people aren't "hating" in these forum, and I hope that you (or any of us) haven't been the victim of such. I'm bringing this up because: The reason I think your comment 3 was about me [please note that unless the person who submitted his comment to this forum identified his racial/ethnic background like I and a few others did, or it's apparent due to their username (like yours, BlackDude) or profile pic, etc., I have no idea the race of anyone who has submitted comments]: Although my post wasn't the first, or even the 2nd to mention a racial group outside of black or white, I was the first to identify as a non-black or non-white person, and I discussed my Asian ethnic background and shared my experience as having lived as an gay Asian man. If I'm not mistaken, all of the posts prior to mine in this forum were submitted by black or white guys. Therefore, I am the "some other minority" in your statement. I don't really think my comments need further explanation, but I'll make a couple of key points that I hoped would convey: They were in direct response to another user's views about Asian men. I quoted that user's statement in my response. My comments mostly focused on my lived experiences and my personal viewpoints. At no point in my comment do I claim to be speaking for anyone other than myself. I'm certainly not trying to speak for all Asians on this forum or anywhere for that matter. In fact, I write, "I only speak for myself," At the end of my comments, obviously not so successfully as gleaned from your comment @BlackDude, I attempt to pull away from the Asian-specific nature of my preceding remarks and bring things forward by discussing race issues in broader terms. Now, whether your item 3 is directed at me or not, please let me comment on a few things (but know that most of this is coming from the belief that your #3 was directed at me): First, thank you. When I first read your comment #3, I was absolutely floored, because at no point while I was writing what I wrote, reading others' comments, thinking through issues presented in this forum, or rereading my submission would I have thought that someone would have gotten from it what you did, as expressed in your comment #3. It's a perfect lesson for me in that no matter how open-minded I think I'm being, it's not enough. You presented me with a very different interpretation of my words than what I thought I had presented, and differing viewpoints are good things. Second, another thank you. You thought my comment was so good that it threw off the entire conversation to be no longer about black people, that it thew "us [black people] off the stage." To this day, I don't really see that, but I respect your viewpoint and I am taking it as a complement in that it was so persuasive. Although I believe I was the first non-black or non-white person to comment in the forum, I was not the guy who introduced "some other 'minority'" into the discussion. In fact, I wasn't even the first to respond to that user's initial comment. It was only after that first guy who mentioned "Asian" wrote his follow-up that I knew for a fact wasn't true as based upon my own lived experience that I chose to comment. So, by my calculation, I was the 3rd individual with the 4th post that mentions another racial ethnic group. To me, that's pretty darned unfair to be "blamed" for attempting to divert the conversation when I was the 4th post by the 3rd poster that evoked another race other than black or white. Let me be clear, I was not trying to steer the focus of the conversation away from where it had been or where it was going. The fact that there are two more pages of comments after mine is just one example of that. Another example of this is that there are only a couple more posts in those 2 pages that mention another "minority" and only one comment by another self-identified Asian member, and that comment is about wanting to be someone's friend. Other than at the very end of my comment where I evoke "Avenue Q", I do not accuse any commenter in the forum as being racist. I am confused by your second sentence in comment #3, which was, "Any other time these groups openly participate in the racists attitudes and activities, but as soon as the certain white guys don’t want them, it’s racist." I don't think you're directly accusing me of openly participating with a racist attitude or in racist activities, but please correct me if I'm wrong here, you're accusing racial/ethnic groups to which I happen to belong of these attitudes and activities. I've read and re-read this sentence many times. Going purely by the words you wrote and my grasp of the English language (however loose that grasp may be), I think what you're trying to say is that Asian guys have racist attitudes and sometimes these attitudes manifest into racist actions. I'm inferring that you mean these actions and attitudes are against black people. However, your comment continues by essentially saying that only after an Asian person is rejected by a certain subset of white guys will that Asian person see the light and come to view the the aforementioned attitudes and activities as in fact racist. If that's what you were going for, then I'm going to ask you to please reread what I wrote. You surprised me before with your interpretation of what I wrote (see above) but I just do not see how what I wrote brought you to thinking this. This post is already WAY TOO LONG, so I'm going to summarize my comments related to your last two sentences of comment #3: Racism is about justice. It's also about inequality. But you know what? It's also about access. It's about access to quality education, and healthcare. It's about access to safe places to live and access to communities (however you choose to define community). It's about access to good-paying jobs and access to reliable transportation to get to that job and anywhere else you may need or want to go. It's about access to media produced for the masses that doesn't conjure up the most negative of stereotypes of a demographic. Racism is about many, many things. Your comment leads the reader to believe that someone fighting for "access" is less noble or less right than someone fighting for justice or against inequality. I believe something different. I believe that access is critical, and that access could be a part of the mix to right past wrongs. There's so much more to say in light of your comment #3, but I'll end with another reminder to you @BlackDude, no hate here. I respect your comments and views. I've never met you. How could I hate you? And heck if #3 wasn't directed at me at all then hopefully this will give you and everyone a good laugh 🙂 (if anyone made it this far).

So incredibly creative!

Amazing. Well done! So honest. I doubt many of us on this site could be so honest with himself/herself, I know I can't. Although you're not new to the site, I certainly hope this is just your first of many contributions to this community.

safest bet is crew club or glorious health club. check both out. good luck!!

Cant thank you enough for sharing this with us @daddybear54 , but will try: Thank you! This community is lucky to have you here with us, sharing your talents, your words, your artful expression of it all. Thank you!

Sadly, it's not just gay men. One look at the stats of women killed at the hands of an intimate partner (some of whom I can only assume use various technologies, not the least being GPS), and it's scary/eye-opening. Please stay safe out there!

Skillful connectivity to Hawaiian 9. Great work overall!

The Steamworks in Seattle and Vanvouver are also similar to the Chicago and Toronto locations with Seattle’s being the least well-kept IMHO but still nice with secure doors to rooms etc. All of my visits occurred pre-pandenmic (~2016-2019) except Toronto which occurred since pandemic My most recent attempt I got denied at Chicago because I had an ibuprofen bottle open. It also had my generic OTC Zyrtec in it. The guy said Id need an Rx and i said no one has Rx for OTC, and Im a tourist, its common for tourists to have these items. DENIED! Now they ban all bags? jeesh! I do get the liability issues but no bags seems a bit much. Maybe they could’ve done the “clear bags only” rule like at stadiums and schools. That’d be kinda fun and talk about advertising where youre headed!

I’ve also seen ads on Scruff app. But quick search of the googles “free HIV test at home” showed me local and national public health resources with tests available (mostly in person but didn’t look at details), but the results also showed non-profit orgs like this one that offer free tests to be mailed: [think before following links] [think before following links] https://together.takemehome.org/ Not sure if this is pandemic money or the weird issue of reimbursement rates by the drug manufacturers’ being overpaid or some other cause making tests free but it wont last (at least in the first two reasons mentioned) so get ‘em while you can!

Great story. Very hot, but also incredibly well-written, and with various sub-plot development. Creative art! Thank you!