hntnhole

Which is the crucial component. Almost anything can be melded into a loving relationship - with "outside" sex being among the easiest. Since you and your other half discussed the issue, and came to some agreement before indulging your lusts, that's respecting everything about being "in love", as opposed to living with a lie. I say "Yay for you" too - both of you.

Wouldn't that ability be lovely? But no - we're mired in our humanity - one part of which is being determined to live our lives on our personal terms, which invites the descent into discord which you so eloquently describe. It seems to be our "fatal flaw" as human beings. Perhaps one day we - as a group of enlightened human beings - will get to that state of nirvana where we'll solve our issues calmly, rationally - but that day has yet to dawn. Still, we can do what we're able to bring that day a few steps closer to reality.

Interestingly, recent reports indicate that the Mexican Government was more responsible for severely limiting border crossings*, simply because they didn't want another go-around with the former US President. Good on Obrador (and Pardo), as far as I'm concerned. *Apparently, the undocumented, the refugees with sordid histories, etc, were sent back to Mexico's southern border, and then repatriated to the country of origin.

Same place as always .... it's not as jammed as it is during "snowbird" season, but it seems that the locals are even more depraved when it's just us year-round residents. Maybe there's something to that old saying about "Southern Rot" 😇

Revel? Really now - that's a bit much. It's not we life-long Liberals ever venerated the Cheney's. Sure, we're glad there are some Conservatives that have seen the light enough to stand for avoiding the darkness, but we hardly "revel" in those folks waking the hell up.

Nope - wasn't at all. Health-related discourse is the last place sarcasm is appropriate, in my opinion. It's not that I can't use sarcasm - I often do in the political threads, and it's generally unmistakable. I think that guys who have "lived-experience" can always offer more depth in their responses to questions, and health-related issues are among the more important / serious questions we discuss on BZ. Thanks for chance to be clear ....

Thanks for your reply to the British cumdump. Advice from those who really know what they're talking about is invaluable.

In the largest cities in the Midwest, gay life was much the same as outlined by others above. Chicago being the mega-center of gay life, most gay guys that needed to move to somewhere other then where they grew up, moved there. In the 'gaybor-hoods', the usual necessary shops, stores, etc were patronized by mostly gay men/women. However, in the non-gayborhoods, there were plenty of gay folk too. Not everyone lived in the thick of it all. All the "near" neighborhoods/burbs (meaning, relatively close to Chicago-proper) had plenty of gay folks for neighbors, particularly along the elevated train lines. Even when the various ethnic neighborhoods (mostly European immigrants) there were plenty of gay folks, if not bars, etc. "Boystown" (which was actually named "Lakeview") was ground zero though. Tons of bars w/backrooms, gh joints, porn theatres, as well as cruisy areas along the lakefront parks. The worst part of any of it was finding parking at night. Walking from any of the fuckjoints back to your car you could stumble over a pair of guys fucking - and either join in or keep going - it was just not anything out of the ordinary (at night). Those were heady days for sure ... and I'm really grateful to have been there experiencing all of it.

I've written about this a couple of times, so more is buried somewhere in the "archives" - but ...... When covid came, another T buddy (who lives close by) and I came to an understanding: We liked each other (as brother-Tops), and arrived at a mutually-agreeable plan to get through the epidemic together. In the early days of covid, not much action of any kind was taking place in the fuckjoints, and we'd seen each other fucking bottoms at the orgies for a while. I knew he was "modestly endowed", and I knew he has a nice ass, so we made an agreement that we'd each allow the other to get off in our Holes at times. It's not like we hooked up every other day - far from it. But we trusted each other, and both of us realized that we could grit our teeth and take a load, and in exchange, fuck our own load up a raw Hole. So, it was an "even-steven" exchange: I get some Hole, he got some Hole. After we were done, we'd laugh our (full) asses off at what we'd just managed to do, with neither one of us liking when it was the other guy's turn, but a deal is a deal.

As an ex-Midwesterner, my sympathies to you guys. I went through it for decades. This is why (well, one of the most important reasons) I moved to S. Florida. It's still in the high 80's/low 90's, sunny, and will be up until T-day. After the rainy season, it's "planting season", and I start with different things in the yards. It's not for every guy, but it's for me. Yes, I know one day a storm will come along and blow us to kingdom cum, but until then, it's all good. Point: make sure you ask the question of yourself (and other half, if applicable), which is, do I hate the cold enough to do something about it?. Maybe a half & half setup? There are tons of gay snowbirds who come for the cold season, and then go back home in the spring. One last enticement: mortgage rates are falling, and the housing supply is plentiful.

Yes, Israel does have treaties with a number of NATO countries, but hardly deep enough to go to war with Iran on Israel's behalf. Those NATO treaties are more "supply"-type treaties. In the event of an Iranian attack (nuclear), I'm sure the NATO countries would do what they could, but that wouldn't be a whole lot. I can't imagine a scenario wherein NATO would enter the Israel/Iran (+ proxies) conflict. NATO has it's hands full with Ukraine and the associated issues. I would be surprised by anything more than a statement or three out of NATO. Yes, I agree, and our only option (short of entering a prospective war with Iran). Encouraging Netanyahu to do anything constructive to peace, however, has been as slippery as an eel. He's only interested in himself, his future. Thanks for your always interesting perspective !!

It seems things are turning for the worse on almost an hourly basis now. The IDF has managed to kill the leader of Hezbollah in Lebanon the other day, which act is deepening the chances of general war. Chances seem to be increasing hourly, and we hear only the same old statement (singular) from the President. I realize he prefers to conduct foreign policy personally, and make only a few statements publicly. I'm not sure that's better than waiting for even more consequential events to take place over there, before the President makes some kind of weighty statement to Americans. We won't get one from Harris, and that's as it should be. But I wouldn't mind if she gave the PM of Israel a genteel little kick in the balls. I'd like it a lot more of Biden did it, but that won't happen either. I don't expect the Harris Administration to radically alter the existing ties to Israel, but a little whisper of something would be welcome. This sitting on the razor's edge won't go on for months and months. The confounding issue is, our President will fulfill our treaties, MDA's, with Israel, despite the reed-thin support for war with Iran in the American citizenry. The Iranians already know that the previous President threated to nuke them to smithereens - and would do whatever drifted into his stunted mind on a moment's notice, if empowered. I just don't see much in the way of good options; hopefully some of you guys can ....

I don't enjoy bottoming, and I won't do it unless there is some extremely extenuating circumstance in play.

LOL .... such art - such craft ...

Best of luck to all the guys on the West Coast of FL. Stay safe !!! Here on the SE coast, not much of anything happening. C'mon over if you need to ditch for a while ....

Of course. As I see it though, the crux of the issue is yet another two-faced pol mouthing one thing, but doing something quite different. These past few days, Israel has advanced the chances of general war exponentially (the radios, walkie-talkies), to the point that there's a distinct possibility we could see a repeat of 1978. With no noticeable progress in the negotiations, and overt aggression on both sides, Israel's main, most important ally should indeed speak with only one voice. With the looming elections in the US however, I don't see how both sides in the current trouble can be equally handled. We have substantial populations of both sides residing/voting in a few weeks, and apparently the margins are razor thin (with Harris rising and SH receding). While there are roughly twice as many Jewish folks than Palestinian, both are important to each candidate. Stupidmouth does himself no favors with his inane spewings, and Harris simply can't be seen to stray too far from the President's policy. It's possible though, that as the situation deteriorates, someone close to her campaign could make "surrogate" statements without her actually doing it. Not the best by any stretch, but it might work to make her positions less hazy. The anniversary of the initial rampage is close upon us, and I anticipate something deleterious soon. Somehow, these two groups of folks have to want this shit to end, and in some equitable way. At present, I think the only hope of degrading the war fever resides in Tehran, in the fear that if a general war breaks out, Iran would get nuked. One thing I wonder is, where on Earth are they going to put all that junk - the destroyed buildings, infrastructure, mega-tons of it - before they can start to rebuild. Maybe divide the junk in two - make one tower of it in Israel and one in Palestine - so coming generations of residents can see what happens when hard-headed politicians exercise their hatreds of each other, and maybe learn to support each other, rather than murder each other forever. For all our troubles in the US, at least we're trying to deal with our issues without open battles in the streets. That's at least something - at least for the moment, anyway.

So you're leaving getting what you need out of life to chance? Is there some reason you're willing to leave it to others to decide for you? There has to be more to this issue than you've communicated above.

I don't think I've ever run into a sling (in a fuckjoint or anywhere else) that didn't have spring-clips attached to all 4 risers, for the purpose of individual adjustment to the users at any particular time. To me, it's perfectly natural to adjust the clips to the most advantageous height - and the next guys to use it should do the same. Same with the legstraps. The height should be as comfortable as possible for both guys.

To the OP though, I don't care one little bit whether I might (or might not) be able to procreate. For me, it's totally a non-issue.

It does in my book .... but next time you have such a good time, I might run out of fingers .....

Frankly, I've never so much as seen a sling mounted over a bed. Never heard of it before either. It seems to prevent both the bed and the sling from being used properly. I've seen the chains adjusted in the fuckjoints many times - done it myself, for that matter. The whole point of a sling-fuck is to get the height perfectly correct for both the T and the b. Kinda like mounting the steering wheel of a car in the trunk !!

I agree with the above. The way I see it, that's the entire point of raising children - one's own biologically, or adopted. The sense of wanting to instill worthy values into a next generation is at least as valuable as an innate urge to procreate (which implies nothing but the urge to ensure the survival of the individual species). All species share that basic urge, from insects to plants to more "advanced" species - particularly human. It's not inconceivable that once a certain species reaches dominance over every other critter - human or otherwise - that the procreative urge can wane. It's just as valid a premise to want to take care of those already here - alive and needing all the instinctual things like - oh - food, shelter, learning right from wrong, some shred of dignity - rather than increase the already-swollen numbers of a particular species. There's one particular species that's become really good at "culling the herd" every century or so, maybe because they were unable/unwilling to consider alternative choices. I wonder if we'll ever get to the point that "us" overtakes "me" in our group consciousness.

VERY !!!

Cypher leaps to mind; in the original, Arabic sense of the word.

To the OP, I think Harris has been fairly muted in her discussion of the Israel/Hamas issue because she's still the sitting Vice President, and if she has other ideas than what the President has, she's keeping her statements somewhat muted. That, of course, is entirely appropriate, since she's not President yet - and won't be for a few more months (x=crossed fingers). The sitting VP can't be seen/heard to be at substantial variance with the President's policies. If she's our next President, I'm guessing that she'll announce some very different policies for the area, and relatively quickly, which hopefully won't include Netanyahu. I see him as just another trumpette - concerned only with saving his own skin, to the detriment of whoever disagrees with his policies. Interestingly. while Israeli elections can be called whenever it's appropriate, they can't be called when the "War Cabinet" is in session. The War Cabinet is a handful of hardnosed generals, politicians, that are aligned in their views with the PM. This contrivance is what's protecting him presently, and it's been months since Bennie Ganz quit the W.C. in disgust. When the day comes though, I think Ganz has a great chance to become PM - if he'll accept it.