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Trans men In bathhouses


Chubbytransguy

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On 12/7/2023 at 12:21 AM, BootmanLA said:

The reason people object to trans men in bathhouses is they don't want to be around (or see, or both) a vagina while they're having sex. That's the only reason.

First, this has been a fascinating discussion, and thanks to every guy that's contributed.

To the quote above:  it's entirely correct.  Some guys just don't like women very much, and certainly don't like the idea of seeing "female-anything" in the fuckjoints.  That disinclination, however, belongs to them, and should remain in their minds, not their mouths or behavior. 

There is absolutely no valid reason to be anything but mannerly, polite, to every single person at a fuckjoint.  We don't "owe" each other having sex with folks we're not attracted to, but we do owe each other some measure of respect.  How does it hurt a guy to acknowledge the humanity of some other guy that has the courage to deal with such an involved issue as gender-reassignment? We don't have to fuck them, but we do have to be decent human beings - none any better or worse than any other - until bad behavior enters the picture.  

Everybody gets to be who they need to be, and no one gets to judge others for merely understanding themselves, and taking serious and complex steps to become what they simply need to become.  

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1 hour ago, topblkmale said:

 

Respect is not owed to anyone because they're from a marginalized group. Respect is earned.

 

This is America where we enjoy Freedom of association. 

 

Persons with vaginas don't belong in gay bathhouses. Full stop.

 

And who died and made you Emperor of Gay Bathhouses?

You're free to associate with whom you want. You're not free (in this country) to tell other people they can't associate with the people THEY want to associate with, in a space you do NOT control.

I do agree that you don't have to respect anyone. You do, however, have to TREAT other people with a certain level of respect if you don't want to be kicked out of establishments where your attitude isn't welcome. And I would venture to say - bear with me here - if the bathhouse allows trans men to participate, they are welcome. Probably more than some anti-trans bigot who's going to make a hissy fit about being too close to a vagina.

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While I don't personally object to FTMs at the bathhouse and have enjoyed having sex with several of them, others have made valid points about the need for fuck venues to limit the clientele. My personal preference would be to figure out how to limit it by the persons preferred activities. If we could figure out how to keep posers, cuddlers and guys who only engage in foreplay out of the fuck venues regardless of what is between their legs, I'm all for.

Edited by NWUSHorny
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There are always going to be people at bathhouses and sex parties that we won't want to click with, for whatever reason. There might be some people whose presence might turn us off. Unless they are doing something in violation of the norms of those venues--if they are actively harassing you or someone else, most notably--I am very wary of the good sense in setting up arbitrary boundaries. Where will you stop?

More broadly, back when I was not monogamously coupled, I do not think that FTMs would necessarily have been out of place in the different parties and scenes I visited. Ther big dividing line relative to them was making the choice to be at the venues, not the sort of positions or activities you would like to do or the sort of genitalia you have. 

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On 11/30/2023 at 11:27 AM, hungry_hole said:

We are interested in size, shape and how far does a cock shoot

I do not know if someone has already responded to this comment as I am slowly working my way through this thread with reading, commenting, and giving any react emojis I wish to give in chronological order, thus have not read any comments beyond this point (on page 2 of the current 10.)

Not everyone is solely interested in dick, if at all. Of course, if someone is a bottom that 'might' be all that is of interest unless someone also enjoys being fisted, rimming (give and receive), felching, and anything else I have not mentioned. 

Then there will be Tops who might enjoy taking advantage of any given dick present but their main interest will be an ass. And then of course there are Tops like myself who enjoy an ass and a vagina yet have zero interest in a dick whatsoever, and would much prefer it if a dick is locked away. 

The point here is not everyone is interested in one part of the anatomy and a setting such as a sauna or sex club sees a diverse crowd all of whom have differing needs and desires.

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On 12/12/2023 at 12:39 PM, topblkmale said:

Respect is not owed to anyone because they're from a marginalized group. Respect is earned.

There's another way to consider/understand this issue:

A certain basic level of respect is due to every person, every other person regardless of "grouping", if we're calling ourselves civilized human beings.  That basic level of respect is the "default" position, as opposed to an assumed "disrespect", unless and until x person demonstrates their worthiness of our respect.  

Unfortunately, the above quote demonstrates the opposite:  disrespect being the default position reflected, with some measure of respect only doled out if x person/group happens to (advertently or in) - reverse the judgement.  

Just my 2 Lincoln's worth.

 

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If all the FTM guys in all the gin joints in all the world (who wanna commune with naked gay guys fucking anything that moves in a bathhouse) came into mine, I'm sure the number and proportion would be so infinitesimally small as to be unnoticeable! I just don't see why folks are getting their knickers in a twist over this. If you encounter even one, consider yourself exceptional and buy a lottery ticket I say! 😎

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