ErosWired

I can’t say whether it’s worse now, but it’s been bad in this way for quite a while in my experience. I’m not a ‘hottie’ - I have never considered myself remotely competitive visually (from the front at least) so I’ve never even tried. It’s why I just park myself and serve anyone who comes to me. But in doing so I have absolutely observed what you’re talking about - I’ve agreed to take men who didn’t show, only to message me in the morning and tell me they had, indeed, fallen asleep with their cock in their hand. And I call the period between midnight and 2am “The Doldrums” because nobody ever hits up the hotel cumdump during those hours - they’re all out jockeying for something choice. Then, like clockwork, starting about 2am, here they come, not so choosy after all, and not too pretty to fuck a free whore in a cheap hotel room. So true. I have often wished there were some way flakes’ profiles could be indelibly marked every time they flake on someone. Impractical, obviously, but @bbzh makes some interesting suggestions. Until there’s a downside to flaking they’re going to keep doing it. One could almost imagine a rating/comment system, except that it would be instantly abused by jealous competitive bottoms trying to sabotage each other and trying to get revenge on Tops who reject them.

Asking no questions could, however, be a sign that he is oblivious to risk and doesn’t realize what he’s getting into at all. I would never assume a person’s awareness any more than I would assume his consent. But then I readily admit my own double standard - I fully expect and trust that men assume my consent to fuck me without question.

I don’t fit your desired demographic and am not a candidate, but may I ask on behalf of those who might be, what you mean by “May include...family”? Do you mean that you intend to require your Kik slave to perform acts of your choosing with members of his family?

You don’t know what you’re going to do? I’m no fortune-teller, but I can tell your future - you’re going to go out looking for a guy to take his place, because you’ve crossed that inhibitory threshold, discovered how incredible it makes you feel, and you’re not going to want to stop. So you’ll try out some of the apps you’ve heard about like Grindr or BBRTS, or depending on where you are and what you’re like, you might try out a gay bar or throw caution to the wind and check out a bathhouse. And whatever means you choose, you’ll pretty easily find men willing to cunt you. But it’s a wild, wild (wild) world out here and you got lucky your first time; there’s no guarantee the next guy is going to be gentle or considerate. Your best bet, of course, is to follow the traditional, and perfectly respectable, route of getting to know someone and actually becoming friends before moving on to the benefits. In the gay world, however, the fast-forward button seems to be stuck on the porn player, and things tend to advance quickly, if not immediately. I can’t count the number of times I’ve exchanged introductions with a guy only after he’s just fucked me. Now, your post is that of someone newly aware of this facet of male sexuality, and yet you’re here, on a specialized forum for aficionados of bareback homosexual intercourse. Perhaps you’re genuine; perhaps you’re just having some fun. It doesn’t matter. My answer to the question assumes it’s for real, and there’s very little doubt what you’re going to do. Have sensible fun, and take care of yourself.

There’s no question that until a practical preventative or effective treatment is developed, we’re going to have to think about sanitizing where and how we make contact. That’s going to be an alien concept and a hard sell, I fear, to some men who revel in “piggy” sex. It’s not as though any of us are fucking in a NASA Clean Room (and if you are, shame on you - it would be terrible if the first evidence of life we find on Mars turns out to be chlamydia from your crotch), but some men seem to fetishize microbe-prone behavior. It’s hard to get more microbe-friendly than tonguing another man’s bodily fluid out of a third man’s anus. Myself, if I host anytime soon, I fully expect to be doing a lot of wiping and disinfecting of the space between Tops, for their safety as well as my own. The bottom line is that for the indeterminate future, this thing we enjoy cannot be done without assuming a risk to uninvolved persons. Yet neither can a trip to the grocery. We can only measure the need versus the risk, determine how much we can limit the risk, and from that make an acceptable decision on how to proceed. Sexual release is a basic human need, as vital as any human contact. Going a year without sexual outlet is a great deal to ask, and for some, perhaps it is too much to ask.

Tops have used racial language before when fucking me, on three different occasions in the last couple of years that I distinctly remember. All three tops were black. All three used the N-word. I categorically loathe it. It’s especially unpleasant because any time it happens I find myself caught in the middle of two powerful impulses dragging me in opposite directions. On the one hand, my immediate reaction is a big ol’ internal Nope - and a strong urge to pull away and tell the Top that I’m not doing that. On the other hand is my training, the way I was conditioned to accept the Top without question or resistance because He is exercising his right to use my body sexually as he sees fit. Anything I do that might spoil his enjoyment is unthinkable. So, so far the training has prevailed and I have taken the use, though not engaged with the language. It troubles me. It makes me feel complicit in an abhorrent system I reject entirely, and I wish men wouldn’t do it. As others here have pointed out, however, the roots of individual human sexual arousal grow from deep and convoluted places, and from a psychological standpoint I’m not sure my taking a social stance would benefit that individual therapeutically in that moment (note the absurdity of a cumdump slut suggesting his ass as a form of therapy, but I have seen men have moments of catharsis after a session with me - it becomes much more than just a fuck). A case in point: In one of the three incidents I recall, the Top, a shortish but toned man, moderately well endowed (I mention this because it’s relevant) began straight off by telling me that he owned my white ass (so far true on both counts as far as I was concerned) and he was going to give me “what a white boy deserves from a N* with a BBC”. I was shocked by what he said, and a bit surprised by the cruel ferocity with which he carried it out. I sensed that he was tense - in pleasure but also somehow angry. When he unloaded in me and pulled out, he slapped my ass hard, and then quickly got dressed. Before he went out the door, he said, “Remember that.” And of course, I do. I just am not sure what it is I’m supposed to understand from it. Perhaps he was trying to give me an understanding of powerlessness or oppression or violation; if so, I could feel that. Perhaps he was trying to make me feel a sense of the anger he felt at helplessness - if so, I sensed his anger, but could not commune with it; I’m a faggot cumdump made to be fucked by men, and what he did is what I’m for. I can only hope that by letting him fuck me the way he did, with the racial overtones he laid upon the act in his mind, I was able to help him find a measure of peace in the afterglow. But I cannot be certain.

Yep. Troll. The shrillness of its cries indicates a juvenile of the species. Because they support an orange fascist racist slimeball moron. Make sure you point out the irony of him trying to un-white himself. Or just: Because they support a “fascist, loofa-faced shitgibbon”. Still, to my mind, the internet-winning description.

Absolutely. I have taken exactly one cock since March 15. My normal cunting grounds are Louisville and Indianapolis, and where have the regional raging Covid hotspots been? Wait for it... Louisville and Indianapolis. I feel useless. I don’t really hunt for Men, I just set myself up in some easily accessible public place, let every guy within range know where an what I am, and wait like a goat tied down to lure tigers. But I can’t do that where I am at home in the rural wastes. There just isn’t the cock to service. I can tell my hole has tightened up because I haven’t been regularly fucked. Dildos are helpful, but there’s no substitute for another man fucking you to stretch and expand you internally - you simply can’t get the leverage to do it properly yourself. I hate to do it, but I’m afraid I’m going to have to find a Top or two willing to help me by spending the time to stretch me out - I normally wouldn’t ask the Top to do something for me, and I only hope I can find one or two who actually enjoy just playing with a hole. When I return to service - and unless they lock us all down again it will be soon - I’m going out armed to protect myself and the Tops against infection as much as I possibly can.

This is good news, but before you plan a night of slutting, be sure to ask yourself: Is my city under curfew? That might impede the quickness of any connecting after a given hour. I almost decided to try a night in Louisville earlier this week when I happened to see a sign at a fast-food drive-through that said, “Because of the curfew, we will stop serving tonight at 8:00...” Well, fuck.

In idly shopping the net for a new dildo today, I ran across a page of cock sheaths/extenders and also ass ‘sleeves’ to fit into a bottom’s hole so (it says) he can keep taking it and ‘feel fuller’. Now, this is a *bareback* fucking site where the scorn for allowing any barrier to come between the contact of bare cock and bare ass is nigh on universal, so I would think this question would basically answer itself. But these things aren’t condoms - they’re...enhancements? Personally I can’t imagine a reality in which I would ever ask a Top to fuck me with a sleeve lining my ass, but they must be selling these things to somebody. The cock sheaths/extenders I could understand perhaps if there are situations where size becomes a problem with penetration, or there could be other medical reasons, but these aren’t being sold as items for men with special problems. I would think that for the average guy, nothing would amplify any existing feeling of insecurity about his size worse than strapping on a fake enlargement. Has anybody ever actually used such things? Did you still consider it bareback because you didn’t use a condom? Why did you choose to use them? Another item that I have looked at from time to time is the kind if dildo that ends not with a set if balls or a suction cup, but a flared lip followed by a handle - basically a cock on a stick, a dildo with a grip on the end. When I’m in service in hotels or bathhouse rooms, men routinely pick up the dildo I have with me and fuck me with it - sometimes brutally. I’d kind of like to get one of these handled cocks, but I wonder if the handle would just give men more grip and leverage to try to take their brutality up a notch. Has anyone had any experience with these?

Excellent post.

Another possibility related to “wannabe” status is that he’s kind of a free-range Dom - he’s motivated by Dominant/submissive relationships but has had no formal introduction to or experience in the BDSM lifestyle, its philosophies, ethics, protocols, standards, best practices, etc. If that turns out to be the case, then there are some quite interesting books on becoming a successful Dominant out there that would no doubt make for stimulating reading..,

Thank you very much. This is precisely the kind of insight I was hoping for, to bridge the gap between my lack of understanding and actual lived experience. I hope you will accept my apology for the offense. I would, however, quarrel somewhat with your premise about perception being reality, because it bites me in the ass so often as a disadvantaged person of another sphere. Indeed, it has certainly been my own experience that people are going to react on the basis of what they perceive regardless of whether their perception is valid. But that doesn’t validate the perception. To say “perception is reality” is, to my (again, Autistic) mind, not a premise that can be accepted, because it’s precisely the premise that might cause a white woman in a certain. situation to say “A black man is near me and I’m afraid for my life, send the cops.” Her perception, based on god knows what mental process, tells her that black skin equals threat. If “perception is reality”, then that man, though he has no such intention, must accept that he presents a threat to her that justifies a call to the police. Except, he doesn’t. Her perception isn’t reality. Allowing people’s irrational perceptional reactions to supplant fact is the very reason that people of color have to live lives in which they must be always aware of their surroundings and context - because any observer’s arbitrary reaction could suddenly override their reality in a negative way. I suspect that the conviction with which you gave me those words as advice reflects lived experience. But it should not be so, and cannot continue to be so if any parity is ever to be realized in our society. Every person has to learn to automatically assume that every other person’s words are not meant to give offense, and to search for every other possible interpretation before offense is taken, or nothing will change. It actually does matter how pure my intentions are (you say ‘how pure you think they are”, suggesting you aren’t convinced, but which of us is in a better position to assess my intentions?). It is the perceiver, not the one perceived, who attempts to set the parameters of reality, and that is true no matter what color your skin is. So since we can’t all have our own set of ‘alternative facts’, at some point we all have to agree that fact = fact.

Did you actually read through the posts? I already addressed why I’m talking about this as an alternative to street protest. Have you read anything I’ve ever posted on this forum? If you had, you would realize that no matter what your sexual motivation is, or anyone else’s sexual motivation is, mine is never about whether I get fucked. It’s not about what I’m going to get, goddammit. How many times do I have to explain it? Not everyone is out for himself, believe it or not. I spent a 30 years as an underpaid, little-thanked federal civil servant, and I did it because helping people every day was its own reward. I was trained as a sexual service submissive because pleasing men and meeting their needs is its own reward. In both cases I’ve served literally busloads of Men of Color, because they had the same right to the best service I could provide as everybody else, and I was proud to be able to enrich their lives. Your insta-judgment of me and my motives reveals more of your character than mine, and sheds light on why the situation is so intractable on the streets. But no worries - I’m Autistic, and people often react negatively toward me because they misjudge me. I’m used to it. And actually, properly considered, I guess I can take your post as an example of the kind of reaction I would get for my offer, so, thanks... I guess.

Thank you to those contributions useful sources of ideas for how everyone can make a difference in standing up for this Movement. If the time is not now, for God’s sake, when will it be? In this topic, though, I’m exploring a question particularly about the appropriateness, protocol, and feasibility of offering sexual hosting as a public service limited for a time exclusively for Men of Color, for the reasons explained above. This is the difficulty, of course. If I were to hang a sign on my hotel room door reading “Whites Only”, I might easily be accused of having a Jim Crow ass. Racism, by definition, is conditioning anything you think, say or do on the other person’s race. Doing negative things on this condition marks one as racist, but by the definition, anything positive one does on the basis of the condition must be racist as well. Supporters of Affirmative Action must be racist in the sense that they act because they are not race-blind, are aware of race, and take a position regarding members of the disadvantaged class. While these statements are true of some men they do not represent all men, and certainly do not represent me. I believe my writings on these boards over the last three years consistently reflect that I view my submission to and providing for the needs of Top and Dominant/Alpha Men as a service, for which I was trained, and that I approach each individual as a human being whose need is my overriding concern. I do not objectify them; there is no criterion any man has to meet in order to enjoy my body. My own physical pleasure is not the issue (God knows - sometimes I willingly endure pain to serve a Top well) nor is it ever a question of “what I can get”. But I am well aware that my approach to sexual service is not common and one is much more likely to encounter bottoms with a more self-oriented agenda such as @Pornyherv02 describes. Men are routinely objectified for various attributes, and black men, regrettably, more frequently so. I have read here in several topics about Men of Color who suffer rejection on the apps at rates higher than the average. So this is why the whole business strikes my Autistic brain as absurd - I neither care nor really even notice whether a man who comes in to fuck me is black, yet I am forced to consider the question by everyone else, only to discover that the same rules that condemn a racist for treating people badly also prevent him from specifically treating them well, lest he stii be called a racist. If I see that you’ve suffered, feel human compassion, and want to do something nice for you, is it not allowed because I’m the wrong race? Because there’s no way I could possibly be sincere? Because there’s no way I could possibly not be a racist? My head hurts just from writing this, it’s so self-contradictory. I just want to know if there’s any hope for understanding. If I offered myself, I would have no agenda - if Men wanted to enjoy me just to ease their stress, that’s fine, if they wanted to hate-revenge-fuck me and release some of their righteous anger that way rather than in street violence, so much the better. I just have no idea whether any Men of Color would actually appreciate or make use of the offer. I’m for real about this, and if it means I’m an idiot, that would be good to know.

I don’t know that it automatically would. No one is born racist - it has to be learned. In my case, my autism manifests as either/or rational thinking - either something is rational, or it’s irrational. I see behaviors based on someone else’s skin color as irrational, so I reject the idea out of hand. I don’t even think about it. Friends have on occasion told me that I may have put myself in danger by blithely strolling my chalky self into certain places where I am told I ought not to have gone, but that’s something I will never develop a sense for because my head’s literally not wired for it - but I don’t even want to, because it would mean I would have to internalize a whole suitcaseful of unfair and unjust - and irrational - assumptions based solely on skin color. I refuse to be irrational. Bear in mind, I know quite well what racism is, because I’ve witnessed egregious instances of it first-hand in my life in the ass-backward places I’ve grown up and lived in. But somehow I always simply knew there was no sense to them, they were wrong, and I could safely put them in the stack of things I didn’t need to try to learn. I’m very glad I didn’t learn them. I can’t say it would be the same for every autistic, but I can say this: We’re terrible at lying because we’re no good at it. Either something is true or it isn’t, and it’s hard to accept as true something that makes no sense upon examination, such as “black skin makes him less of a person”. That just makes us ask, “Why?” Until it becomes clear that what we’re actually being asked to accept aa the truth is a lie, and then we just get stubborn and cross and people start calling us assholes because we won’t just be like everybody else. So left to our own devices, I’d say we’re more likely than not to consider racism absurd and pointless. Which is part of what makes my question here awkward - today’s circumstances are forcing me to think about the impact racism even if I don’t feel or properly understand it, and I am uncertain whether I can or should my compassion for those affected by giving them my body to fuck for their pleasure and satisfaction. In fact, I almost went ahead and planned to try it tonight until I realized that Louisville is under curfew and after 9:00pm no one would be able to get to me. What a world...

Given current events (that have regrettably been in the making for centuries) I feel I should preface this question with a couple of points to avoid misunderstanding. First, I am white. Can’t help that, born without enough melanin to keep me from crisping up like bacon after half an hour at the beach. I cannot pretend to understand the totality of the experience of being a Man of Color in this society; I can only claim to have observed it as an appalled resident of the Appalachian South, and to have the barest inkling of an understanding of being on the receiving end of bigotry, hatred, prejudice, injustice and violence - I am a gay-leaning bisexual intellectual autistic who grew up an live in a place where all of those things are rejected. I have been treated as a pariah, and physically assaulted at my former workplace because of it, and my experience still doesn’t qualify me to understand being Black. I accept that humbly. Second, I’m Autistic. Among other things, for me that means that when I see a man on the street, I don’t notice what color he is. I don’t mean I can’t see skin color - I’m not blind - but an autistic brain has to limit tha amount of outside information coming in so it can process it. As a part of this, my brain simply filters out any observation of skin color as irrelevant data, because so what? I don’t care if you’re green. You’re all Men to me, regardless of tint or shade. So, if I make a comment hereafter that seems out-of-touch, clueless, or insensitive, it will be because I don’t understand well enough to be properly savvy, and Autistics are notoriously tactless in spite of our best efforts otherwise. And now I have spent three long paragraphs just basically explaining why I, a white guy, should have the nerve to ask you black men a question - and it’s horrible that it’s come to this. On to the actual Question: I was lying on my bed reading about the protests and considering the possibility of going to Louisville to show solidarity in the demand for justice and equality. I would read accounts of individuals’ unjust, unfair, and far worse treatment simply because of their color. The whole concept of profiling drives me insane. I tried to extend these individual misfortunes to an entire population, and the magnitude of the suffering it added up to left me feeling helpless - how would my standing on a street in Louisville lift up even one individual’s life? Now, I know the answer to this. One person standing in the street may do nothing, but a million may change a society, and that million are composed of Ones who each have to decide to come forward. I get that. It becomes the rising tide that floats all boats. But I still can’t stop thinking about the problem on the individual level - the one-on-one human-to-human level where the healing has got to actually take place - and I asked myself if there was anything I could do for them. [Here’s the bit where I want to make sure I’m not misunderstood, and where I would appreciate your counsel.] It struck me that I don’t have much useful to offer. I can’t employ people, I have no influence or power or money. I felt I want to do something to remind these men that they are Men, and to know that there are those who honor and respect and value them exactly as they are. And then it occurred to me that that’s basically what I do whenever I host - I accept Men exactly as they are and use every skill I have to let them know how excellent they are, just as they are. So the idea came to me to offer some nights of hosting exclusively for Men of Color, not because I have some “BBC” fetish, but as an appreciation, and as a special service to that community. I can see such an offering being misunderstood. I feat that some could even be offended by it, though that is the farthest thing from my intention. How could I make such an offer in a way that would be understood to be genuine? How so that it would show the right kind of respect? Could such a service even be offered by a white ass like mine without conjuring up all the tawdry overtones of interracial porn? I would very much like to give myself to men who have suffered so that they can take their pleasure as all Men should, and know that in that room they are simply human. I would do my best to make them feel sooo good. It’s entirely possible that I’m crazy and this is a terrible, offensive idea, but that’s why I’m asking. I know you men will give it to me straight.

Assuming that this isn’t a fantasy and you’re simply looking for similar titillation (it has been known around here) I’ll take your question at face value. If this is indeed the case, then these are deep waters, and you have been unwise in allowing a Dominant - any Dominant - to advance to this level without prearranged and mutually understood and agreed-upon boundaries and limits. As a submissive, you have a responsibility to yourself to protect yourself from predation by unethical abusers. I fully understand the effect that a Dominant Male can have on a submissive the moment He enters the room - will and determination can melt away like wax in a furnace, and suddenly you’ll do anything for a hint that He’s pleased with you. The reality is that the relationship may be very one-sided. Without further information it’s hard to guess. Does he bring other men to use you and not participate himself? Has he instructed you to go to a given location to service someone? If others are involved it raises the possibility of something transactional taking place at your expense, and you should extricate yourself from the situation at once. More than one person has found him- or herself trapped in a life of sexual servitude this way. If the Dom is getting you to do unpleasant things in spite of your expressing that it’s crossing a hard limit, he clearly does not have your best interest at heart. If he is employing blackmail, even by suggestion, or other forms of coercion, his motives are not benign, and again, you must pull away. It could be as simple as him wanting to see how depraved he can make you before he tires of you, or - one dislikes to consider the possibility - he could be ‘grooming’ you for something. On the other hand, there is the possibility - and you are unclear on this point - that you simply have not clearly expressed to him that you don’t like what you’re doing, and if he knew he might be perfectly willing to stop. You have a role to play, too, in setting your own boundaries, and “But I’m so submissive” isn’t an adequate excuse for not looking after your own interest once you sense that something is wrong. Having armed him with all the pics and video he has, you may have limited yourself to undesirable options for ending your predicament. The only certain way to defeat a blackmailer is to render the evidence he holds irrelevant, and therefore worthless. In the worst scenario, you may have to simply say, “Do your worst, but I’m done with you.” And be ready to mitigate the consequences that, after all, you yourself allowed to come into being. There is also the possibility of counteraction, in which you document the abuse in such a way that he would be compromised by its exposure - but that’s a bolder and more dangerous path. My personal experience has only stood along the edge of this kind of situation, and fortunately there were friendly allies in a position to intervene. Still, the incident taught me caution, and taught me that there are some Dominant Males who genuinely view submissives as toys... or worse. It’s why I’m always asking Tops here whether they really mean what they say about what they think of faggot cumdumps, or they’re just having fun talking. I’m not going to judge them, but as one of those cumdumps, it’s important for me, and submissives like you, to know where we truly stand.

The long wait ended for me tonight. The young stud I’ve been teaching to Top me sent me a text that read: Time for an ass filling. He just graduated with his nursing degree, and part of his training was on a Covid-19 ward, so I knew that if he decided he was safe to call my ass in, I could be reasonably sure the risk would be very low. I myself had been temperature screened earlier in the day. What a difference a big load of another man’s cum in your ass can make. The desire to give myself up to Men for fucking has come raging back; I feel it from my ass lips to my fingertips. This, I imagine, is the most dangerous time of all, when powerful temptation begins a siren’s call to throw caution aside and feed the needs of the flesh. I realize now that I’m shortly going to be back taking cock again - now I have to figure out how to do it while I still protect myself and the men who use me...

The difficulty with adopting a 1-on-1 vs group strategy is that it omits the time consideration, and in terms of the type of experience, compares apples to oranges. At the party of 100 where I’m fucked by 40 guys (in my fevered dreams) I will have had a remarkable experience of high-volume serial intercourse which is not comparable to the experience of a single hookup. For the man in search of that particular type of experience, the cost/benefit ratio in terms of risk becomes skewed because of the relative difficulty of engaging in that kind of group action rather than individual encounters. Then there’s the question of the time involved. Taking the 40 fucks at the party would take a matter of hours; arranging for and completing 40 1-on-1 sessions would take days, if not weeks. And if the 1-on-1 hookups are found, negotiated, etc. via cruising rather than online, one could conceivably rack up more person-exposure hours getting those 40 hookups than one would have gotten at the party. For men like me in areas where the availability of individuals for hookups is slight, our only recourse is to travel to areas of higher population and seek out opportunities to make ourselves available to volumes of men in an efficient manner in a limited time. We may hook up 1-on-1, but we’ll have to seek out riskier venues in which to do it. And of course there’s a volume aspect as well - spacing those 40 fucks out over the course of days or weeks means that you could have had those 40 individual fucks - plus the 40 you already took at the party. While I understand the point you’re trying to make about risk reduction, the Math of Loads is going to make it a hard sell, I fear. Lastly, the question of regulars rather than strangers - It becomes a difficult question for a dedicated service bottom and cumdump who is used almost exclusively by anonymous strangers and caters to the needs of such men on a regular basis. There may be a few “regulars”, but not in the sense of a FB who can be assumed a reduced risk. If I am to somehow ethically return to my service of giving my body to those who want it, I’m going to have to come up with practical risk-reduction practices like the hoods you’re talking about, washing my body and sanitizing my space between every visit, etc. And pray for a vaccine.

Headache is one of those results that varies from person to person, and by extent of use. The thing to remember is that all poppers are vasodilators - they act by causing the temporary enlargement of blood vessels. Any radical change in the way blood is moving through your brain, or a rapid change in the structures inside it, would stand a chance of giving someone a headache I suppose, but I’m not a doctor. The headache might also result from having to whiff more of a weakened bottle to get the desired effect, but that’s just a guess. Fresh is always better. Like you, I was reluctant to purchase online, but when the store I got them at stopped carrying them, I had no choice. It’s actually been pretty painless.

@BisexualBttm68 - You're not dealing with nitroglycerin or sulfuric acid, bud. It's not going to explode or dissolve away your fingers. Poppers are not, as some here have suggested, some unstable, unknown mix of highly hazardous and possibly life-threatening chemicals (though see below). Rather, all commercially available poppers are created from chemical members of the alkyl nitrite group, originally amyl and butyl nitrite, but in recent times, almost exclusively from isoamyl, isobutyl, and isoproply nitrite. If you carefully inspect the ingredients listed on your bottles (you'll probably need a magnifying glass) you may find that some of them are already mixtures of two of more of the nitrites. Mixing them does not somehow turn them into a bomb or a death potion. By the time you're down to the dregs of a bottle, however, the effective volatiles in the bottle will have largely evaporated (up your nose, one assumes) so there is little to be gained by combining the oily remnants. If you are determined to do so, caution is necessary and a small funnel is indispensable. It is true that poppers can cause chemical burns to skin, although this is more likely on tender areas such as the area around your nostrils, lips or genitals. Getting poppers in your eyes is also ill-advised. Prompt irrigation with plenty of water and seek medical assistance if needed. Note: I would recommend avoiding the use of poppers containing isopropyl nitrite. Unlike other types, isopropyl nitrite has been found to cause a type of eye damage called maculopathy. Regrettably, isopropyl has become more commonly used in Europe because governments there have banned the use of isobutyl nitrite. Inhalation of poppers is, in fact, a relatively benign practice - The Merck Manual of Diagnosis and Therapy finds the hazard associated with inhalation of nitrites to be insignificant. Governmental guidance in the UK places poppers among the least harmful recreational drugs. That being said, it is possible for them to kill you under certain circumstances, to wit: Using them in tandem with Viagra, and using them in the presence of flame. DO NOT USE POPPERS WHILE TAKING VIAGRA. This can cause a precipitous drop in blood pressure, leading to death. This isn't theoretical - this has happened. DO NOT USE POPPERS WHILE SMOKING (anything). Poppers are extremely flammable and can ignite readily in the presence of spark or flame. They will not, however, spontaneously combust simply from being mixed together. One more thing, since you're talking about mixing things out of dubious bottles. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES should you mistake "Maximum Impact" for poppers, let alone try to mix them together. Maximum Impact is ethyl chloride, not an alkyl nitrite. It is an anaesthetic, and it can both hurt and kill you. Steer well clear of it.

On occasion when I’m hosting I’ll get a message from a Man of Color who says, “You like black?” I’m autistic. My immediate thought is usually something like, It’s okay, but I’m really more partial to green, and then of course I realize what he’s asking. I hate it when that happens. I hate it for him, because his life experience has taught him that to avoid trouble he has to ask if it’s okay to approach me In his own skin. I hate it for me because for the sake of his own well-being he has to assume I may be a racist bigot - an assumption ironically based on the fact that my skin is a different color than his. I also hate that I have to feel awkward because my experience has taught me to particularly look forward to sex with black men. I can’t tell why, as a general rule, they provide me with the most physically fulfilling fucks I have the privilege of taking, but it has nothing to do with the color of their skin or the size of their cocks. Not every one of course - they’re people, and individually unique, but whether because of cultural influence or some other factor, a high proportion of such men who have had me have been especially good at sex. I’m just sorry that in explaining to someone what kind of giys I enjoy fucking me, one of the words I’m expected to use is “black”. Of course I “like black”. I like it the same way I like every other kind of man , without distinction - if a man has a functioning cock, I don’t care if he’s blue, and I’ll talk to anybody.

@tallslenderguy - Reading your post, I realized that the way I posed my question suggested that I find these guys attractive. Like you, I don’t. I’m not intimidated by them either, I don’t feel left out of their circle and want to play their reindeer games, and I don’t feel inferior to them. Yet in spite of this, I feel a strong obligation to let them have their way with my cunt. Anyone who has read much of my writing on here might observe that I feel a strong obligation to let any man have his way with my cunt, and that’s true, but that feeling is increased for some reason if the guy is cocky, overbearing, or otherwise inclined to treat me more like a whore than a lover. Who knows - maybe I really am just fully settling in to my permanent role as a vessel for semen, and fully grasping the full extent of what that means for me. Ironically, one of the things that sets off the five-alarm Nope warning in my head is if a guy who’s fucking me says something like, “I could fall for you so easily.” (This has happened.) I’d gladly take on a dozen callous brutes who call me faggot as they rut me rather than tangling with one unwanted romantic’s needy heart.

This thread has taken a fascinating and unexpected direction - the explanations of different possible mindsets of attraction in this context have all been excellent, and I hope they continue. I haven’t yet heard one that really encapsulates my personal position ( @FaceLoad possibly comes closest) but so far I’ve found something to think about from each of you. Good thread!