Did You Ever Think You Would Be A 'barebacker'?

[nelliess]

I'm meeting a fuck buddy shortly and I was remembering first time we met I didn't even discuss safe sex or barebacking, just sat on his cock and let him jizz in me. Which is the pattern for a lot of my hook-ups now.

 

This got me to asking myself what I would have said to that a few years ago? I would have been amazed that I was unshamedly being a barebacker.

 

So, the question is did you ever think that it is something you would embrace so completely? Especially those of us who grew up during the first AIDS crisis and got the safe sex message drilled into us. I appreciate this may not apply to guys who have always barebacked or who have lived with hiv for a long time. But those who have decided to abandon condoms over the past few years, did you ever think you would?

[CaliBugChaserSD]

I always felt I would eventually. I resisted for as long as I could. Did I think I'd eventually chase HIV and get it... never. I was scared to death in my early 20's but any of us over 35 were probably at one point.

When advising up and cumming bottom slut pigs (and surprisingly, I get asked a bunch). I tell them that jumping to barebacking is a slippery slope, pun intended. It's like a Lay's potato chip, you can't eat just one and you can't get fucked and bred by a great top and not want that shit over and over again.

So, if things like HIV and STD's scare them then stick to the condoms because yeah, you'll get those occasionally or permanently, depending.

If you couldn't care less and know in your heart and mind that having men cum inside you is more important than breathing then go bb and experience what sexual freedom truly is.   

[snaketat]

No doubt, I am responding as an old guy!   For those of us who were actively fucking guys in the "pre Aids" era, I think our view of barebacking might be a bit different than the guys who became sexually active post Aids.

 

I had been riding raw cock for nearly 8 years before the first mention of the "gay plague".  In the horrible days of the early 1980's, most of us lost lovers, friends or family due to the virus.  For many of us, that meant changing our behavior, losing our cherished bathhouses, theaters and dark rooms.   Without any knowledge of what would happen to us, we had to react to the epidemic or risk certain death.

 

My personal efforts to avoid Aids were two fold.  First, I started taking jacketed cock.  It was not enjoyable---or at least it did not feel as liberating as fucking bareback all night in a bathhouse.  The second part was that I simply reduced the number of guys who I let plow my ass.  In short, I stopped being a free-fucking slut and became an uptight, conservative queer.  

 

However, as the new century started, I also started barebacking again.  Absent the public locations for wide open sex, I was certainly more careful, but I made the decision to take the risk.

 

As the 2000's unfolded, I found that while I wanted it raw, most tops in my circle still choose condoms.  While I was not fond of that, I always respected their wishes.

 

Long story short, that has evolved into me only taking it bare now.  I understand the risk....and know that I may have to manage dealing with becoming HIV+.   In respect to those I lost due to Aids, that is not something I say easily.  So many men gave up their lives due to the discrimination against queers.  Their deaths have resulted in the prevention and therapy that is now available to sexually active gay guys.   They paid for my increasing freedom to take random loads.  

 

So, I never doubted that I would return to being a "bare only" bottom....but I do it always with a reflection to the folks who died because they did the same thing.

 

I fully engage in this activity and have no doubts that many guys enjoy the same thing.  We are just fortunate that our risk is more controlled and the potential outcomes are not as bleak as it was in the early eighties.

 

With so many things in the LGBTQ world, we do owe those who queered it up before us a big thank you.

[NLbear]

I am still surprised after all these years that I have never been infected with AIDS. Cruising the parks at night since I was 18 I took cocks without condom (pre-AIDS). Then the news about AIDS hit in the 80s, but I was so hungry for cock that I took them with or without condom in the park at night. Things slowed down a bit after that. But at university a few years later I was dancing the night away and ended up (slightly drunk) at some guy's place and couldn't care less if he was using a condom or not. I just wanted to get fucked.

 

30 years later I am still neg. PrEP is not available here. If it was I would take it. But if a guy wants to fuck me bare I let him. I hate condoms.

[bootmandc]

No doubt, I am responding as an old guy!   For those of us who were actively fucking guys in the "pre Aids" era, I think our view of barebacking might be a bit different than the guys who became sexually active post Aids.

 

Long story short, that has evolved into me only taking it bare now.  I understand the risk....and know that I may have to manage dealing with becoming HIV+.   In respect to those I lost due to Aids, that is not something I say easily.  So many men gave up their lives due to the discrimination against queers.  Their deaths have resulted in the prevention and therapy that is now available to sexually active gay guys.   They paid for my increasing freedom to take random loads.  

 

So, I never doubted that I would return to being a "bare only" bottom....but I do it always with a reflection to the folks who died because they did the same thing.

 

 

Great post snaketat.  Couldn't have said it better.  

 

Another "old" guy here who started out bb.  I mean what was the point of a rubber ... not to get pregnant???  Then the great crisis hit and I lost friends and lovers and presumed I would die too. I did not.  So I went to condoms - which are not comfortable for either the bottom or top, and I pretty much shut down. Truly NEVER imagined in my wildest dreams that I would be here doing this now for so many reasons.  I find myself thinking more and more about the friends I lost and know there are risks ... and somehow that risk has become the drive.  

 

So many of these folks will never understand it .. and good for them.  For us, it's a deep complex issue few will understand.  But it's been one hell of a ride.

[drscorpio]

I remember clearly in college (circa 1982) giving my straight boy friends the business about how it sucked to be them and have to wear rubbers.

I had about 3 years of unprotected sex before I moved to Austin for grad school in 1985. I totally embraced the safe sex hysteria and always wore a condom although I still barebacked with two fuckbuddies from back home because I had tested negative and "knew they were safe." Once long distance eroded those two relationships, I assumed I would always use a rubber until I had a LTR. 

 

Then one day in 1992, I hooked up with an older Hispanic guy from a personal ad (in a newspaper mind you). He was short and think but had an enormous cock (8.5" and thick - that looks huge on a guy who is 5'6" and 135pounds). I was just supposed to be giving him head, so  I wasn't alert to the need for a rubber. We 69ed a while, and then he started eating me out. I had never been rimmed by an expert before. Before he was done, I was a moaning, writhing puddle. I was so open and relaxed that when he shifted position slightly and pushed, his big cock slid all the way into my hole. 

That was the moment when my whole life changed. I never wanted to be fucked with a rubber again. Unfortunately, I wasn't brave enough to be myself yet. I made him pull out after a few strokes and rubber up. Fortunately, he was very into me and was willing to fuck me covered. But I couldn't forget how good bare fucking felt. We kept hooking up, and on our 3rd time I quietly asked as he reached for the rubber "Do we have to use that?" We were fuckbuddies for several months until I had to move for work. During that time he fucked me enough times that he probably has put more loads in my ass than anyone other than a boyfriend. 

 

Over the next 4 years or so, I slowly used rubbers less and less. If the other guy insisted, I would, but I never objected if he didn't. After that, I started insisting on bare. I took every load I was offered for almost 20 years without turning Poz. I have been on PrEP since May.

[subbytch]

Nope. Never. 

 

Came of age when AIDS hit. Didn't like condoms. Didn't want HIV.  I'd pretty much ruled anal out of my life. While oral is great, my sex life was missing a certain intimacy. PrEP came along and changed that. 

 

I -wish- I had those 30 some years in-between back. There's no way I can make up for all those lost fucks. Being a different person now than I was in my teens and 20s, I get turned on differently than I did. So it's still a little more complicated than just headed to a sex club and getting bred by a thousand guys. 

 

But...

 

The sex I am having? Awesome. I still need more dom tops in my life, so that's part of my hunt. But to be on that hunt is an amazing thing.

[cumslut23]

I lost my cherry barebacking, but when safe around the time I turned 18. The sexual health infos really worked on me which was great. I was scared to shits about STDs and HiV. 

I resisted temptations for three years and even played it safe in a monogamous one year relationship. However, to be honest, I think I knew from the first cock that I would end up where I am now. My slope was almost a downhill race (got knocked up less than 6 months after ditching condoms), but I'd like to believe that the 17 year old me would get hard looking at me know. 

 

Now, if the 16yr old me would have played it safe from the word go, maybe things would be different...

[BiAggieGuy]

Since I've been barebacking since my first time, to me its just how it always was. However, I was very picky and would do my best to ensure I wasn't fucking with poz guys. However, thanks to PrEP, I'm now fucking with almost any guy, regardless of status. I never thought I'd be doing that, but of course PrEP is a recent development.

[garsento]

I had not anticipated developments like PrEP and TasP, at least. That the state of the medicine would advance enough that we could take a pill to ward off HIV infection if we had bareback sex--that I could have unprotected sex with someone HIV-positive and have an exceptionally low chance of contracting the virus, if he's undetectable--is astonishing.

[Guest kazore]

Like torcub i didnt anticipated recent developments. Honestly i never thought i would be a barebacker. Even a year ago it would have been inconceivable.

I haven't used a condom since June, had multiple raw encounters with guys met online. I even met guys from bbrt for the 1st time this month (3guys so far).

[cheatingjock]

I always thought I'd be the good boy. The one that meets his brother young and is with them for the rest of their lives...clearly I didn't know who I would become.

[spitjack]

I came out during the AIDS crisis and was vigilant about using condoms, so I never thought I would be a dedicated barebacker.  I haven used condoms in 7 years. 

[cam1972]

I always hated condoms. And always wanted to bareback. But the tops I met up with always wanted to play safe and wouldn't fuck any other way. I had a two year relationship that ended in 2006. He wouldn't bareback. After that relationship ended, I actively searched for someone who would. I found him in February 2007. I've never had a condom in me since. Even tho I had a fear of HIV, it's not natural to wear a condom. Or have one inside. I always wanted the feel of skin on skin. So, yeah... I kinda knew I'd be a barebacker. At least hoped, anyway.

[btm2bbred]

When the AIDS crisis hit in the 80's, I continued to go to the bathhouses in NYC and SF, and elsewhere taking raw cumloads up my ass.     Hell, we did not even know what caused AIDS until HIV was discovered in 1985 or so.     After the bathhouses closed, and guys I knew, both tops and bottoms, were dying, I finally got the condom religion in 1986-1987.

 

I cut out anon fucks.   Most of the Tops I hooked up with insisted on condoms, and I was good with that for the next 23 or so years.     I never liked condoms, but I also was more scared of becoming HIV+ since there were no effective treatments.     Once the antiviral cocktails came out in the 90's, and AIDS was not the death sentence that it was, I loosened up a bit and experimented with a few known fuckbuds to bareback again.    But it was probably less than 10% of my hookups.   I really did not think I would be able to bareback regularly.

 

I started going back to the baths in 2005 or so, but made sure my fuckers were wrapped.    When a handsome dude stealthed me in 2008, and dropped his cumload in my ass it changed everything for me.   Although I was pissed, I was also boned by the idea of having cum in my ass again, and that skin on skin felt so much better.    So my stealther did me a favor since I no longer was afraid of HIV--and I no longer felt the need for condoms.    If a Top wanted to wear one, I went along.    But these days it's always bareback.    I'm still neg, and not on PrEP.    If I do get the bug, I'll deal with it.   Stuff happens.

 

But I would not have believed in the late 80's that I would be barebacking and getting cumloads up my ass again.