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14 hours ago, NudistBBBLK said:

We also know that sex with others is sex and sex between us is intimacy

This, it seems, is the key to the whole business.  There's a huge difference between having sex with other men, and the intimacy that 2 men who care deeply for each other experience. 

Interestingly, it's not only possible, it's rather common for guys to experience both together.  

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56 minutes ago, tallslenderguy said:

religious and heteronormative cultural conditioning.  

Fortunately, I managed to avoid that trap, and here's how I did it:

One of my mom's friends wanted me to take her frumpy oldest daughter to the prom  (there was a second sister I would have gladly taken, since she was a lot of fun and a real trouble-maker).  So mom waited till dad got home from work, everyone sitting in the living room watching Cronkite, and she said (names changed) "Mary (the mother) would like you to take Jane (daughter) to her prom.  I want you to do it".  My dad just sat there, waiting to see what I would do, with this tiny little hint of a smile.

Of course, I was outraged, and said so.  So my mom angrily said "alright then, call Mary and tell her that he daughter isn't good enough for you".  My dad's little smile grew a bit.  I replied "No, YOU call Mary and tell her what a stupid thing that was to do, and make sure she doesn't do what you've done to HER kid" (there was also a boy in that family).  Dad's grinning widely by now, and saying nothing.  

Mom attacks dad for not supporting her.  Dad laughs and says he hope she's learned a lesson.  Mom stomps off to the kitchen to get supper out of the oven.  Everyone eats in silence.  And my mom never asked anything like that again.  

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3 minutes ago, hntnhole said:

Fortunately, I managed to avoid that trap, and here's how I did it:

One of my mom's friends wanted me to take her frumpy oldest daughter to the prom  (there was a second sister I would have gladly taken, since she was a lot of fun and a real trouble-maker).  So mom waited till dad got home from work, everyone sitting in the living room watching Cronkite, and she said (names changed) "Mary (the mother) would like you to take Jane (daughter) to her prom.  I want you to do it".  My dad just sat there, waiting to see what I would do, with this tiny little hint of a smile.

Of course, I was outraged, and said so.  So my mom angrily said "alright then, call Mary and tell her that he daughter isn't good enough for you".  My dad's little smile grew a bit.  I replied "No, YOU call Mary and tell her what a stupid thing that was to do, and make sure she doesn't do what you've done to HER kid" (there was also a boy in that family).  Dad's grinning widely by now, and saying nothing.  

Mom attacks dad for not supporting her.  Dad laughs and says he hope she's learned a lesson.  Mom stomps off to the kitchen to get supper out of the oven.  Everyone eats in silence.  And my mom never asked anything like that again.  

Oh wow, You were a Man of substance, even as a teen!

This reminds me of a similar push back i've been privy to.  i had the privilege of having a few email exchanges with Noam Chomsky a few years ago. He's an amazing, kind and caring Man.  We were sharing some personal stuff and He told me that when He was younger, He decided He was going to be more religious than His father. Noam is Jewish, and this occurred when He was only 13 at the time of Bar Mitzvah.  Both of Noam's parents taught at Yeshiva, essentially Jewish religious university. He told me that about a week into the process, He decided religion was not for Him.  i am in awe that a 13 year old had the substance and presence of mind to make such a decision, which He has maintained His entire life.  Interesting to me that Jewish culture has maintained the centuries old tradition that adulthood happens at 13 (puberty?). 

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I’ve been with my partner for nearly 5 years. We are both passive and enjoy sharing cocks in back rooms together. We are both ff versatile and this is great. We only play together and at sex parties we love to offer our cunts, mouths and fists. 

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10 hours ago, rawsneakerfreak said:

 I ready miss going to clubs, party's or pride events (which he doesn't like) and explained this to my partner but it get shut down quickly alway end of topic with him. Sex isn't that brilliant between us recently, so rarely that I get bred these day which gives me a feeling of emptiness. I tried a few times to rise my feelings and concerns but he doesn't want to talk about it. My real concern is that one day I might be over come with my feelings end up meeting up with a random guy to breed me which in a close relationship would be wrong to do as I don't want to cheat on him but I do want to be who I am. 

I’ve always wondered why two people who aren’t completely happy in their relationship… monogamous or otherwise… stay together… some to the point of not having sex for years. I’ve had guys who I’ve had sex with tell me they remain in the relationship because all their finances are tied together.  BTW, I’ve heard this from straight couples too. For me, I’d rather be alone if it comes to that. When it comes down to me or someone else’s happiness, mine comes first.

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In a relationship with my gf for 17 years now, with a gap of a year af few years back.

Have been taking cock for longer than I now her. If we hadn’t started dating, I would’ve probably outed myself as gay and a crossdresser a couple of months later.

I never stopped taking cock, although the action limited itself somewhat to me sucking of guys.

When we started out we were fuckbunnies, that ended after a couple of years, and I started taking cock a lot more.

Because of my relationship, I have been very hesitant of taking it bare. But when the cock was particularly hot, I have been known to.

I agree with the opinion that sex is different from the emotional commitment and that both can coexist with different people.

Somehow I think she does not share that opinion

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I am in a long term open relationship - my daddy loves that i am a slut and is very supportive in my cumdump endeavors! He loves me for the slut i am....100% honesty and openness..no stress no drama and he doesn't play with me - but my daddy and i have our own special fun! ❣️

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I was in a relationship for 19 years with the „typical story“: Closed, cheating, open relationship (going to sex-clubs), marriage, divorce. Single for 1.5 years now. Am I sad? Nope. That‘s life. As long as my dick does his job and I have a good boner I am happy. The men I habe fun with appreciate my big loads and multiple orgasm much more than my ex. As a single much more top than bottom. 

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On 9/1/2022 at 12:51 PM, hntnhole said:

Fortunately, I managed to avoid that trap, and here's how I did it:

One of my mom's friends wanted me to take her frumpy oldest daughter to the prom...

I did my Junior Prom and really disliked the frigid bitch (FB) I was setup with. So when Senior Year came, I was already checked out of anything involving my class (including choosing a school none of them were going to attend), and sure enough, FB was looking for a prom date. To which I said "fuck no, never again". Then someone had the bright idea of paying for the tickets in advance and trying to force pair myself and someone else. Again, I was livid at the arrangement and told them all I'm not going. 

I was told afterward that I really didn't miss anything other than having to hire a limo, get flowers, and pay for part of an afterparty at the beach.

I had a blind date once. Turned out she could see.

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My boy is dead. We were together for 14 years. He died four years ago.

I don't want to even see this thread.

I don't want to be in a relationship again. Ever.

It might happen, but I'm not seeking it out. I wasn't looking for one when I met him.

We had a perfect relationship, most of the time. The best possible relationship between two men, when there's sex.

A gay relationship shouldn't mirror a relationship between a man and a woman. The model is a best friend you can fuck. That's a bond men have been forming, with or without the cocks in asses, since men have been having relationships with men, with or without the cocks in asses. Your testosterone will keep that relationship strong.

And you need to be at war with the outside world. Even with other gay men.

I lived that. Matt tried. If he had really lived it, if he had fought for me when I asked, I'd be a full professor in chemistry, easily earning over $200k and traveling regularly around the world. He'd be alive.

I know that, among gay men, your first inclination is to doubt the fact that I could have been successful in life. And then you'll offer "help" that I've obviously been offered before, then think less of me for "declining" it. Or you'll "worry" about me, as if my best next step is to go to a shelter or a rehab or a hospital. Just don't ask what I need. I couldn't possibly know.

Thanks, community.

[If this doesn't make sense to you, please don't comment. It does make sense. Just not to you. And I'm fucking fine.]

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