tallslenderguy

i own several cages, but for me, over time, they've become more accessories, sort of jewelry that accessorize. For me (and i suspect for many others), chastity is more than physical, though on the sexual spectrum, i figure chastity is still an individual experience. i see a "cock" as way more than a penis. Most of a "Cock" to me is the drive, desire, need, behind it, to penetrate, fuck, control, inseminate, impregnate, possess, mark, etc.. In that respect, i don't have a "cock," so caging it is a sort of false affirmation and can miss a true connection between me and the Top Who sees it. i've tried cages on, but i've never caged myself... to me (again, not making universal assertions), that feels contradictory. In a sense, my 'cage' is already in place, it's natural. But i don't really see it like i have a cock in a cage, because i don't see myself as having a "cock" (as described above). i don't really feel i have a word to describe what i have. Some call it a "clit," borrowing from heteronormative culture, but that isn't accurate. i'm not a woman, i'm not trans, i'm not effeminate (not saying anything wrong with those, but none describe me). On an infinite spectrum, i'm somewhere in between. my penis is a sex organ that can derive physical pleasure from being used, but the typical ways our cultural conditioning has of relating to it don't fit for me, so while it may feel good to me physically to orgasm from having my penis used, does not feel good or fitting psychologically. Guys Who see and want my penis as it is are the most effective cage i have experienced. i find the only time i am tempted to masturbate in order to climax is when i have not been receiving enough cock. The only "cock" i have is the one a Man uses with me. The only orgasm i want is the orgasm a Man has inside of me. When i am getting that, i don't need or want a separate one of my own, my sexual energy is focused on His Cock and Orgasm as the connection that we share and bonds us.

Beauty is great, but to me, lust and need are better. i'd much rather get bred by a Top Who lusts/needs to breed me than a good looking Top Who's just fucking yet another hole. For me? The greater the desire/need, the better the breeding. Looks are not top of the list for me.

For me a Tops desire to fuck me is half the fuck. If He wants to breed me vs just breed, that's perfect for me. i don't know if it's so much a "compliment" as it is perfect chemistry and symbiosis.

You've already gotten some great input... a few extra thoughts. While we associate a lot of our lust and need with cock and cum, i think there is a lot more to sex and the connection we need/want with sex. For instance, looks and the visual appeal is part of that "want," but, as most of us are aware, the desire for visual gratification can impede receiving cock and cum. Probably 90% of the thousands of "cock" i have received have been anonymous. When gay sex changed from cruising to online, i found the best way to hook was anonymous walk in. Guys seemed a lot more open to walking into a mostly darkened room and finding me naked and ass up on the bed waiting. i even made a point of emphasizing the anonymity of the arrangement, that i would not even see them because i would be face down. That denial of visual input, and the sense of seeing, ended up accentuating other senses... and also, my inner desire/need. i found out that part of a Mans "cock" that i crave is His lust/need connecting to my own. i could sense and connect to that more when i was not focused on who and what i was seeing. i ended up having some repeat FB's who i know i would never have been visually attracted to had i seen them. Just from feel, i know one of them was probably close to 300 pounds and had about a 3 inch cock. He could only fuck by straddling my legs and Him in a sitting position. Given the size of His cock, i was always amazed that He could get in and actually fuck, but i'm pretty slender and i have more of a boys ass than one of those beautiful bubbles, so there's not a lotta ass crack impeding penetration lol. He was all Top though and His need/desire to fuck and breed me always came through loud and clear... and He always left a huge load. Had i let visual rule, i would have missed that wonderful connection with Him, and He with me. Turns out that 'beauty' is way "more than skin deep," and sometimes we need to be blind to see it.

It made sense to me too. Despite the bravado that sometimes surrounds a D/s or Top/bottom dynamic, my feel is both sides are fed by the pleasure the other derives from them. i don't think there's always a conscious awareness of that, but i think part of psychosexual drive is the need we all have to be loved, wanted, desired. When someone is getting obvious pleasure from fucking or getting fucked, for example, it's not hard to feel they are getting pleasure from who and how we are, not just the act of fucking. i think it's why opposites naturally attract. To me, the best sex is symbiotic.

Oh wow... i've been on squirt 20 plus years? never noticed... it was a great resource for cruise site locations originally before it morphed into an online cruise site

Squirt has a discussion forum? i've been on Squirt for a long time, but never noticed a discussion forum? All i know about is the chat feature, which most hook up sites have? i've actually had lots of hook up success on Squirt, especially since the demise of CL (RIP). And YES, i too have been bemused by guys looking for serious relationship on obvious hook up sites. or worse, have a morally superior air about them, as though hooking up is beneath them (only if they're Top, eh?). i get seriously frustrated on the sites intended for dating... especially when guys hooking up get offended by someone looking for a date or relationship. i know i can't be the only guy out there who'd like to have a relationship or more than a text exchange, but i have a hard time finding guys who do.

BZ is the only community i know of where gay guys, or guys who love guys, have full length, transparent conversation... about anything and everything. Most gay sites are for hook up only. Even sites where the designer is apparently trying for a dating or conversation type format, turns into a hook up site. i'm on one site in particular that is such a place, sort of a gay version of Match.com, with over 125k members. There's room for lengthy, detailed profiles, but i'd estimate fewer than 1/3 of the members take the time to write (or read) a profile. There's also a place for pics and vids, and most guys only look at those. Gives the impression that the gay community is made up of kindergarteners who cannot read and only look at pictures? It's almost comical how many guys grouse or resist taking 5 minutes to read about or attempt to get to know a person, but will spend hours looking at cock pics disconnected from any semblance of humanity. One commonly reads a "profile" that says: "no endless chat or emails," (which i read as: "i have no interest in communication"). i don't find many (read "any") gay communities where it's okay to write more that a five word sentence, where i'm not part of a minority of guys talking openly about life. Many gay sites have chat rooms where one can be swept into a stream of endless, mindless blather. Or, again, soley a hook-up format. Here? Guys can come here during refractory and write about the fuck they just had. i know of no other place where we can do that.

me too!!. i only wanna wear one if it's connected to a Top Who wants me caged. i feel cages are both physical and psychological . i've read of guys who were "caged" by tying a pink bow around their penis, the idea being that the "cage" is in the head. Cages that contain the penis, sort of on display behind bars are a type, and the type you describe physically internalizes the penis. The latter is more fitting for my psychological wiring. i do not perceive myself as having a "cock." To me, a Mans Cock is a penetrative organ He uses to penetrate, fuck, inseminate, dominate, impregnate, possess, etc., with. i don't have one of those. When the body is developing in the womb, we all start out as female, then hormones cause the ovaries to descend and become testicles in the case of a male. i see myself as something in between, so internalizing the penis with a micro has a dual effect for me, physical and psychological. i love a dynamic where my Top sees and wants me that way, it's very affirming and intimate.

He has epilepsy got a deep brain stimulator.

marry me?

my sweet FB had brain surgery, He's been outa commission for awhile, but He made up for it today... i think He may have cum more than once, couldn't hold Him all in.

which makes You an awesome Top imo.

i remember when my hole was tight... i think i was about 7. i can still squeeze, but i'm not tight after a few thousand fucks. And even my ability to squeeze can get pounded out of me. i did try to get into a tight hole, but i went flaccid trying to fight the tight, but i think most of that is psychological, i'm total bottom and i was doing it for a virgin because i didn't want to him to have a bad first experience. He liked it well enough, but i suspect that's because he had nothing to compare too. i suspect a Total Top can get into any hole. i see part of a Tops nature as a hole conquerer. Just like a bottom who'll receive any Mans cock in need, i'm sure there are Tops Who have a "no hungry hole refused" attitude.

This is profound to me, hit's so many notes in me at once, but very harmoniously. No, i don't think they are "lying," i think even in the absence of affirming words, part of what energizes You is the experience and fulfillment of Your desire/need in the response of the person You are rimming. As i see it, rimming for You is another form of "fucking." my sense (which may be wishful thinking lol) is that Your being "a little bit picky" is about the depth of connection? I.e., Your pickiness is about the reason You want/need to rim in the first place. That "picky" is about finding Your opposite equal in intent/desire/need. In my terminology, my attempts to explain this stuff, put it into words, Your tongue and mouth are "Cock." i have experienced Tops where They are so focused and connected, that Their finger, toys, words, a look, can all be Their Cock... and i have been "Cocked" by them in all those ways and more. i have this very involved notion of what "cock" is, way more than a physical organ between the legs, that a Mans Cock is the energy, desire, need driving and expressed through the physical. But loot to experience a Mans cock beyond the penis. Correspondingly, my 'hole' is way more than a physical opening in my ass or face. i know i have written this in other places on BZ, but some of what constitutes a Top/Dom to me are: "Cock, penetration, fucking, molding, creating, orgasm, breeding, seeding, marking, inseminating, impregnating, possessing, controlling.... " to name several. For me, bottom/sub corresponds to Him. yin to HIs Yang (no really new concepts here lol): "hole, penetrated, fucked, molded, creation, orgasm receiver/holder, bred, planted, marked, inseminated, impregnated, possessed, controlled."

Okay... if it's not obvious, that title was written tongue-in-cheek. i'm sure it exists, i see it in movies, read about it. i even see profiles of guys claiming to want relationship on gay sites, and only half of those are obvious scammers. i know i've broached this topic on BZ before, so please forgive another similar post, but BZ is the only gay site i know of that has a forum/discussion setting where gay guys actually have serious discussion. Which is kinda ironic for a site dubbed: "Breeding Zone." i actually know of no other gay site where guys actually discuss and communicate at length? If there are others, help me out, i'd like to know. There are chat rooms, but those are to me are awful, usually a constant blur of un-substantive three word sentences. Is there such a thing as a gay meeting site that is not dominated by guys only wanting to hook? Don't get me wrong, hooking up is great, but the hook up scene for gays is already well covered online, is there such a thing as an online place where gay guys socialize and maybe even romance each other? Or is that just a fictional notion?

Well, my "get it" i think it has to do with our very compatible wiring from opposite poles. We do synch on an awful lot <3. Awhile back, maybe 2 years now? idk, i sorta fucked a guy. One of about half a dozen guys i have ever fucked in my life (and i'm in the >5000 cock club when it comes to bottoming). i saw his profile on Squirt and my heart went out to him as a virgin bottom looking for his first experience. Add to that he was a student from a repressive culture in a country where gay people get killed. i didn't want his first experience to be a bad one that would scar his soul, so i offered being very open about who and how i am. It was a pretty funny experience, and sweet too. He really was obviously virgin, didn't have a clue and was starved for touch and affection. my penis works fine, gets hard as a rock when a Top or Dom is saying all the things that hit my bottom/sub buttons. Mention using my penis for penetrative purposes? It just sits there. So i really had to psych myself... and took some viagra. Still, that barely worked. Especially since he was so tight. i got maybe 2/3 in, but not much fucking happened. Partly because i had to spend time letting him get used to it (and that was after liberal time spent lubing, fingering and opening him first). i did suck him and he came twice, so he was pretty happy, but any experienced bottom would have to have been sorely disappointed in the fuck. Not something i see myself trying again. To me, the psychological part is just to important, even if not acknowledged or discussed, i can feel the energy of a Man Who needs/wants to fuck, and i can feel the energy of a man who needs/wants to get fucked, and that is just too vital of a component for me. i'd rather go without than pretend or just do something mechanically.

i'm total bottom with some sub thrown in, but my sub parts only respond to a certain kind of Dom. Force, bullying, meanness are total turn offs for me and shut me down, a subtle, affectionate Dom opens me deeply and my sub part cannot do enough to please Him. i explain that because my 'bottom' wiring perceives any kind of penetration as top, even rimming. For me, rimming is one of the more subtle ways a Dom can open my hole and my soul, it can be very hypnotic for me to be rimmed and a very possessing thing a Top or Dom can do to open me for possessing. lol i'm a mind fuck kinda guy. When a Top likes to get rimmed? Again, depends on the Guy. i do love a Total Top Who doesn't like Their hole touched because they perceive that as bottom. i love the psychology of that. But i have been with Tops Who love to get rimmed and have found that when They are obviously enjoying it, my response to Their pleasure kicks in and the sub in me takes over to Their intense pleasure. i do love a Mans ass, so that part is not an issue. i do a lot of kissing, licking and biting along with it, it's not just concentrated total rimming. Love a Mans thighs as well, so i can get into the hole region, as long as the mood is right. If i perceive any kind of bottom from him, the connection gets lost for me though... no top in me.

i am attracted to opposite dynamic, for me there's a lot of mind fuck to it, Total Top/total bottom, Younger/older, Smaller/ larger, etc.. Mixes that defy stereotype. Butt, for me, at the root of it is desire, lust. my type is a Guy Who can openly and unabashedly express His lust. Forceful, bullying feel compensatory to me, like they are trying to prove something or make me want them, which is a total miss on their pari, a disconnect. Confidence vs presumption. Lust vs force. Someone Who is willing to be vulnerable with Their lust fucks and impregnates my soul.

There's several threads on BZ discussing the "second hole." It's not an actual sphincter, it's the sigmoid curve, butt to the bottom and Top, pushing into it feels like penetrating another sphincter because of the resistance. One of my favorite reasons for a Man getting there is, to me, it's the impregnation spot. When a Man breeds me there, His seed stays and gets absorbed. Here' a pic of what is being encountered. ❤️

my energy and lust is linked to the Top, when i feel His desire and lust, mine kicks in. i don't really feel exhausted until after i stop. Edging without cumming also keeps me amped up.

i won't deny i have specific taste in Men, but when i see the look of hunger in His eyes, or He simply tells me He wants or needs to fuck... then eyes me as a possibility, pretty much everything else goes out the window. i met a guy a few years back in Palm Springs. Visually, my favorite part of a Man is His ass, which is always ironic to me because pretty much the only things i do with a Mans ass are touch, maul, kiss, lick, rest my head on, and sigh a lot. i can 'worship' a Mans ass right along with HIs Cock, i'm just not a penetrator. So this guy would not have turned my head, He had lost His legs in a childhood accident and they were amputated all the way up to His ass, so He had no ass to speak of. He cock seemed sort of reconstructed too. But He messaged me and wanted to fuck, explaining His situation ahead of time. i am around different people all the time, i'm a critical care nurse, so i've learned that different is just different, not "disabled." (no one has every ability, so in a real sense, we are all abled and we are all disabled). We had a great time together. But again, my on button is a Man wants/needs to fuck, at that point, not much else matters to me... my switch is flipped by that and i'm presenting. Honestly, my desire runs at the surface, if Men had any idea how much i want them.....

i do love verbal, but only if it's real, spontaneous. If it's contrived or rehearsed, it's a turn off. If it's a genuine expression of lust or need? Hell yeah. Force, bullying are a turn off. When a Top knows how badly i want Him though and says so, that is a total turn on. i love when a Top tells me He is going to cum, in all it's forms: "I'm coming, I'm breeding you, take My load, do you want My load?, there's so many ways, but the point is His expression of lust/need. From me? i make a lot of moans and sighs, all involuntary, it's as if the Top is fucking those things out of me. A lot of the words that come to mind are incoherent lol. There are some Guys Who fuck in a way where i feel Their control and ownership, a sort of taking possession in a non forceful, but undeniable way. i've had complete strangers fuck me that way and have had to literally bite my mattress to keep from telling them how much i love them. And yeah, it's the L word that wants to escape my lips.

i appreciate that you thought and wrestled with this. The one thing that stands out to me is "he was obviously green lit." i'm guessing that he made the choice to come to the sex party and found a way to get there and be there. To me, that shows choice, desire, need. Also, if he was "getting plowed bareback continuously," my guess is he had prepped for the occasion, which is another expression of desire in my book.

idk... i subscribe to the spectrum theory of human sexuality, and i think it's more than linear, it's multidimensional, and human sexuality is complex. i was married to a woman for half my life, we fucked often and i played the role of top in the relationship. i was tied into a straight identity because of religious conditioning, but the fact that i had sex with a woman, didn't ever make me straight (even though i tried to be straight for a long time), and the fact that i played the role of a top, didn't ever change my being wired bottom. Words, labels, are never the thing, they are descriptors we use to try and convey a message, in this case, who and how we are. If this Guy perceives himself as straight and that's what He is conveying to me, then i'm going to take Him at face value. i'm not connecting to His identity, i'm connecting to His lust/need to penetrate, fuck, have His pleasure and orgasm inside of me and leave His seed inside of me. Those four things outweigh any notions or thoughts i might have about Him being straight or gay. If we're talking romantic tangle? Yeah, i'm going to give thought to His identity as a straight. To me, that means there's a barrier to connecting on other levels, and i would not want that barrier in a lover. If it's important to Him to maintain that He's straight, it's telling me He is not 100% available for a romantic, loving relationship. The truth is, i don't find that kind of open availability from most guys identifying as gay either. i'll receive what's wanted/needed from either, i love connecting with a Man as much as i can.