LetsPOZBreed

Rule of thumb when I top is that I thrust all the way in and then start shooting in that spot. Makes my bottom feel it throbbing insdie him that way. It's a preference that my tops do the same thing, but some just keep thrusting as they empty out, so the load gets distributed a bit more.

My verbiage aside, i'm not bothered by you or your posts. I'm genuinely concerned for your health and safety. The recurring theme from your posts that I've read is that you are reaching out for our advice and help (which we're happy to give). The real issue is that you keep coming back to your not being allowed to go on Prep, or you're not allowed to express your desires to your Dom - yet your Dom seems to have his own free will do do as he pleases, even if that puts you at increased risk. Part of me wonders if you're questioning his behaviour as well, and I suspect you are. It's totally okay for you to question this; what we are trying to say is that your current relationship set-up is categorically unhealthy (both mentally and physically) and you need to find a way to change it or get out. I do apologise if I'm coming across as blunt, but sometimes the best advice doesn't come wrapped in a nice pretty package.

My esteemed BZ bretheren. I want to pose a scenario to you all that I've always struggled with, but really want to gather some advice on. I've been poz for nearly a decade now (UD for all except the first three months of it). Medically, we're fortunate to be living with it in 2021 than we would be if it were 1981. I tested poz at a time when I needed to really turn my life around, and my journey has made me grow up a bit and really look at how I approach things. Overall, I've done that, but there's one area that I have trouble with...dating. Mind you, if we were on the apps or websites, I'm very upfront and honest about my status. It's there in plain English within all of my profiles. That's not the issue. The issue is when I meet a guy IRL outside of technology. He'll be an attractive guy, very engaging, and the connection is clearly there...but I hold back. It's that fear that we've all had at some point in our lives about how a guy's demenour may change once I tell him (which I will; I'm not into proper stealthing or other forms of dishonesty). My question to you all is: How have you dealt with this in your lives? When do you typically disclose, or when do you find is the best time to do so?

Been a while since I've been fucked anon, but I worry about this more nowadays than before. The advent of smartphones with video cameras, as well as amateur websites where the average joe can post his own homemade porn, has turned some into aspiring porn stars. I don't mind getting filmed if I've discussed it with my top beforehand; but if he's doing the filming, then I insist on meeting at his place. It's more for my own personal safety outside of the sexual aspect - I don't want the potential of some unscrupulous hook-up posting a video that gives away my own personal address (or directions thereto) to anyone I've not willfully given that information to.

It's a time-old issue. The apps and websites only put it front-and-centre. It's not like we walk around our respective cities with our position preferences plastered on our bodies (well, not all of us, anyway....). If we were purely dependent on finding mates in public, then we'd resort to just asking - only to find the statistics about the same as our online experiences. Interestingly, if you do a search by position on the apps or websites, you'll find that there are more guys who list themselves as "versatile" than any other position...but then when you try and chat them up, all they want to talk about is getting fucked. As to WHY this may be the case? That's a loaded question (no puns intended). There's countless older threads that address this topic.

If you're truly not interested in the load, the best chance you have is to explicitly state that. I'm a huge believer in consent, even in rougher (and even still darker) role-play scenarios. In role-playing, though, I will have already discussed boundaries with my partner, though. What you can never control, as has been stated time and again on this thread, is what your top might do in the heat of the moment. Your top may have agreed with your stipulation before meeting and starting, but there's countless stories of a top trying to "convince" you mid-fuck to change your mind (worst time to change your agreement, as you're in the rush of the moment). There's also guys who might just cum in you anyway; it's the type of act that once it's done, it can't be un-done. Both scenarios are a violation of your consent, but that type of stuff unfortunately happens.

That's one, but there's a second one as well (I forget the name, but posted around the same time)

I just KNEW this thread sounded vaguely familiar. @hotguy02 we've heard this before...from you, specifically. Always this concern about not being allowed to go on PrEP and so forth. I'm going to borrow a line from the incomperable Whoopi Goldberg... Molly, you in danger, gurl! To answer your specific question at the beginning...swallowing cum is a very low-risk activity to begin with. Exceptions would be if you have open mouth sores or are prone to bleeding from your gums. This risk is present broadly speaking, but much more so with detectable guys. Undetectable is practically a non-existent risk. To go off on a tangent (because I feel the need to state it again, in no uncertain terms).... I don't know you; I doubt we'll ever meet in person. But the number of posts of yours that I've read about your "allegedly" undetectable daddy are making me doubt the veractiy of his claim. And I don't really have a dog in that fight between the two of you. I suspect with the occasional leading post of yours that you have these small doubts in the back of your mind. This is unhealthy (mentally). I implore you to do something about this before it becomes unhealthy physically...if it hasn't gotten there already.

Ok, that compounds the issue. You're not just trusting your partner, but you're trusting your partner's partners. You can even extrapolate that further into partner's partners' partners... That's not just multiplying your risk, that's exponential (sorry for the math lesson here). I would assume (actually I would strongly HOPE) that you're getting tested regularly to be somewhat sure of your own current status?

Especially for anon play, I'd prefer not to. I like to hold on to the picture I paint in my head. I once had a semi-regular bud in a previous home city that I would meet up with once in a while. I'd come over to his, go up the stairs to the "TV room" of sorts and watch a little porn to get me in the mood - bottle of fresh poppers would always be there right beside the blindfold. I never saw my fuckbuddy - he'd be in a nearby room just waiting for me to put the blindfold on. My putting the blindfold on would be his signal to come to me. One time, after I moved away, I was back on a visit and he hit me up. This time, though, he asked if we could switch things up for him to be blindfolded instead of me - I'll be perfectly honest, I lost interest. It took away this mystery that I had built up previously, and I just figured that going through it would sully my memories of the past. Was a bit of a shame, really...

Speaking for myself, I've had more intense orgasms as I've gotten older. As @BootmanLA says, that gooey white stuff we all love so much is semen, not sperm. I've been with many guys...all ages, races, sizes, shapes, and colours. There's no hard-and-fast rule here. I've had 20 year olds barely spray anything at all; I've also been with guys 50+ that not only shoot big loads, but are able to give me more than one in a session. There's too many factors at play. Each guy is different, and some of us (including me) can build up what we shoot by simply holding back for a bit. If I cum just to cum, it's not a huge amount. If I'm inside a hole, it's more intense. If I edge to porn for long enough, I can build it up to the point where one or more shots hit my face.

Isn't Dallas down to just one bathhouse now? I used to semi-frequent Midtowne when I lived there, but I understand that one closed some time ago. Sleazy motel is good, but I would suggest finding a buddy/wingman to help you out initially. Being blindfolded, you leave yourself exposed (figuratively and literally) to some bad possibilities. I recall the ones up I-35E from Love Field upwards were all relatively cheap and have outside access to the rooms, but it's not the best neighbourhood in spots.

They're absolutely real. I've been fucked before and had them. Any top who has the skills to give me one has an open invitation to fuck me whenever, wherever, and however he wants. To @ErosWired's point, though, it can be weaponised to wher it's no longer enjoyable. I've been fortunate to not let it get that far. Last time I got one, when my top pulled out, I just remember being there - flat on my back with legs still up in the air, and quivering with that all over sensation. It didn't stop for a while. I was there on a bench at a cruise club, with open and raised legs just shaking and moaning for no apparent reason (if you just walked upon me without seeing what I'd just been through, you'd have sworn I was possessed!) Once I was finally able to stand, I still had this constant feeling of release for some time afterwards. It's too bad the cruise bars in London were shut for so long; now that they're reopening, I'm hoping I can find him and get lucky again (I recall every detail about this guy).

No need to apologise for this; we've all had our incidents in the past. It really just comes with the territory that this is a possibility, even for those of us who are averse to any "mess". You're lucky in that you have an on-demand top, but I do understand the issue it presents. I would say that you're overall diet is probably the biggest thing you can do; as stated previously, high-fiber and/or high-protien (and I do mean proper protein, not processed stuff) are tried-and-true methods. I only go as far as a proper fasting if I'm having a blow-out night or weekend at a sauna or big group party.

I think it's just a deeper connection when it's raw. Knowing there's nothing between you and your partner from the get-go bonds you in some way. Yes it feels better, but it's both physical and mental. Pysically the skin on a guy's cock will expand and contract with his arousal level. It also feels a bit "sticky" when lubed and sliding in and out. Mentally, it's just that natural feeling of no barriers. And let's not get started on that feeling of being loaded - how the consistency of the thrusting changes when it's just lube vs when it's fresh cum!

I've not only seen bottoms like this, but have been one and even fucked a few. Couple of things if you're looking to amp it up at a public gathering, though: - Be mindful that since the advent of Prep, bareback bottoming at sex clubs and venues has become uber-competitive. Post-COVID, this is bound to be magnified by the fact that many of us haven't been fucked in a while and are eager to start back. - Do something that sets you apart from the plethora of fauna that may be about. A jockstrap helps, but a really sexy one would be better. Make sure it fits you nice and snugly, and that it grips your ass well enough to give it that nice rounded share (Since you're young, I'm assuming it's quite firm already). - Once you have a date in mind, prepare in advance. If you have any regular playmates, try and arrange a fuck per day leading up to the event. This should get you accustomed to regular fucking. - Try not to pick a weekend evening, if at all possible (there's numerous other threads about this on the site). The best nights for bathouses and saunas are not actually Fridays or Saturdays, but are instead during the week. This night might vary based on your location, though, so I'd defer to anyone you know if your local area. - Don't expect every guy that fucks you to load you. Especially on busy nights, many tops will try and hold their loads until they're ready to leave - at that stage it's only the lucky bottom at that point who will get it; make sure you're a good fuck, and they may come find you to reward you. - And despite what you may hear from others: avoid any hard drugs at all costs. Nothing turns off a top more than noticing a boy is tweaked of his tits. Sure, it may make you feel insatiable in the moment, but the come down is rough.

This puzzles me. Cumdump is one of those unambiguous words. One doesn't need to be inside a hole to dump in a condom, so the only true meaning is to dump inside a hole raw.

I don't find it hardcore, but that's a personal preference. I remember back in uni, I received some "safer sex" literature that was handed out to our campus' LGBT organisation (this was back in the mid-90's). One page in the pamphlet had a list of "do's" and "don'ts", and it warned against the exchange of fluids inside your partner. Cum was obviously listed, but then it also mentioned piss...that was my first indication that that was a "thing" sexually. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I always knew I was into piss play, but reading this jogged my curiosity. I couldn't say the same for the others in the group, though, as there was some pearl-clutching going on. Over the years, I've found that watersports is one of those either/or fetishes. Ether a guy is really into it (count me in!) or is really put off by it. What was good about London, is that there was (and hopefully will again be) a club called S.O.P. held at Central Station on Sunday and Tuesday. Was good to go there and find other guys who were obviously into the fetish...I have some fantastic memories of going there.

The load is the reward. It's a top's way of physically expressing just how good your ass was to him, that he pumps it inside of you. That being said, I make my tops feel welcome inside of me as long as they respect what I'm giving them. Overaggressive fucking is a turn-off; similarly, I hate guys who are "one-note" (same motion, no variety, etc.). I don't mind a top that claims "it takes me a while to cum", if they make up for it by keeping it interesting and me interested.

"It's not the size of the ship, but it's the motion of the ocean" 😄 I don't engage with guys like this either. I certainly don't send the first message; if they engage first, then I'm polite, but upfront that I don't meet their "criteria". As a vers bottom, though, this doesn't happen to me very often. I don't mind topping a guy once in a while, but overaggressiveness in either role is a big put-off for me.

This is an important distinction as well. It should never be the goal to "hurt" in this type of roleplay. This is another big reason for this to be restricted to partners that are very in-tune with one another. Many guys who are into this scenario (as a bottom, especially) have been sexually assaulted in the past; playing out this scene is a chance at gaining control over a bad experience by playing it out in such a way where they do have some unspoken level of control (i.e. safe words/signals). One can even argue that it's actually the bottom/"victim" in this scene that is actually the more powerful one for that very reason; they can theoretically stop it at any time by safe-wording out of it.

If anyone has heard of one in London, do send me a DM. I'd be interested in something like this.

Words cannot express just how important this particular step is (and thank you @BreedingTop71 for calling it out). My personal take on all of this is that you'd be surprised just how common this fantasy is. That being said, there is a way to do this responsibly so that you don't inadvertently cause any emotional damage to your partner. If this is a guy you've only spoken with online so far, neither one of you is really ready for this. This scenario can only be successfully carried out by partners with a deep personal face-to-face connection with each other that's built up over a very long period of time (in some cases years). I don't intend to put you off by saying that. There are many pitfalls to this scenario, though, and not all of these you can anticipate - even for more experienced partners. That being said, it is something you can both work up to. Build up an intimate connection first, then slowly add in the intensity to push each other's limits. Some spanking play is a good first step, then maybe add in some dirty verbal, etc. Always have a safe word and/or safe signal; I'd recommend both, because in the heat of the moment, your partner may lose the ability to speak (may be out of shock or something else), so include a gesture as well so you have an additional safeguard. Discuss a general guideline of the scene (i.e. where it will happen, will you wear a mask, any biting/fighting allowed, etc.), as well as what is strictly off limits (no punching or any other hard limits). Go in with a plan based on that - leave something to the imagination, while still respecting your agreed limitations. You'll need to be mindful of both your immediate and intermediate surroundings. If this is going to happen at one of your homes/flats, make sure the room is clear of anything that might cause a hazard (i.e. nothing loose on the floor) and that you know where a first-aid kit is located - just in case. Also, be mindful of any neighbours - the last thing you want is for a scene that's going to plan, only to have a well-intentioned neighbour call the cops and put you in potential jeopardy; as the "top", you're at bigger risk of arrest (or worse) as the "aggressor" in the scene. The most important...and I do mean the MOST IMPORTANT...part of this process is to discuss with your partner what kind of aftercare they will expect from you (what I've quoted from another poster). Your sub is going to experience a range of difficult emotions - maybe more so, if this plays out in a very realistic way. Even you will feel a range of emotions (so-called "dom drop") where you may wonder if you pushed it too far. You must be prepared to fully accomodate and pamper him - be very loving, tell him how good he is, how sexy he is. This may be a days-long process for the both of you, and you both must be mindful of this. These scenes, if done properly, get INCREDIBLY intense. After everything has calmed back down (and appropriate aftercare measures have taken place), talk with your parner about the situation...what worked, what didn't work, would you do it again, what would you change?

That may be, but I think BBRT might be taking the view that the regional "Connect Now" (or whatever it's called now) is for one-2-one meets. The group section is unequivocally used for groups that run afoul of the max sizes allowed under restrictions in many places. It only takes some bad press of an outbreak coming from the group section of that site that would lead to all kinds of headaches for the site owners; therefore, they are going to air on the side of caution for the forseeable future.

That may very well happen at a private party, but I doubt BBRT will be satisfied with that rationale in order to re-open the parties section.