tallslenderguy

i 'judge" you and where you have "arrived," but in a totally positive way. To me, the fact that you have spent time, emotion and intellect on who and how you are is very sexy. It literally turns me on. Which i think is kinda interesting because it follows a line of reasoning that our mating can be motivated by certain qualities that we find valuable in the other person, and in humans i think that can get complex, even if it's not always a conscious factor. I.e., i will receive any Man, cock and seed that needs/wants me, but the connection/s is/are different and individual with each fuck and breed. There's a connection with all, but the quality and extent of connection is unique with each. i too think of my sexuality as a 'gift' of sorts from nature, or whatever it is that determines such things. i honestly cannot conclude if there is intelligent design or we are a random roll of the genes, or some combination of both. But i do feel gratitude that i express... often to the ether.

i can see two ways to phrase this question: "Do you think we are born to be a cumdump" or "do you think we are born cumdump." i see a difference, one involves volition to me, the other not. Either way, i think the question is just a more specific rendering of the age old question of nature vs nurture. To me, a more important question is "why do we ask?" i came up in a religious culture that taught that gays should not be, that men having sex with men is a 'sin' against nature, or how we were "created" to be. That it's part of the "fallen" nature, etc.. Once i left that way of thinking, the question didn't matter anymore. The more important thing for me is discovering what is and learning how to live well with reality, not spend my life trying to conform to someone else's ideas of who and what i 'should' be. That said, i cannot remember a time when i did not want to be a receptacle for a Mans need to breed, pleasure, orgasm, seed. They're all connected to me, and they represent a more complete way of connecting and bonding. To me, "cumpdump" is a sort of hyper expression of all of that. i've also wondered if it is a manifestation of the natural drive to procreate, a form of being in heat? No evidence of this, it's all speculative, but i can imagine over time, the mix of genes and possible predispositions one might have gets mixed and changed all the time each time a new person is born. It makes sense to me that gay guys have some of the components of women along with their male components. Maybe those who need seed have some of the components and drive a woman has to receive? Idk. To me it feels like i have the female need to reproduce as a receptacle, fused by the testosterone and male need to reproduce. It seems common notion that most guys have a high sex drive. It's enough for me to know i want/need a Man and, so much of what goes with that, inside of me... i don't need to know why in order to live that out.

You'd make a good nurse.

Not so "silly" me thinks. Pulling from my nursing/science knowledge/experience. If the idea is to get rid of pathogens, there are two things that can be done. Killing and/or removing them. Soap and water is more in the direction of removing pathogens. It's a standard for wound care. Using "disinfectant" on a wound can also 'kill' the bodies own defense mechanisms, so antibiotics and disinfectants are reserved for infection when the bodies defense/repair mechanisms may be overwhelmed. Dish soap and water are very effective for lifting and removing pathogens away from a surface. Chemicals like alcohol or bleach kill some pathogens, but not others. Peroxide is a great surface disinfectant, our bodies actually make peroxide. Of course, chemicals can also damage some toys. Heat does not kill everything, nor does cold. Alcohol doesn't kill everything, bleach is pretty broad spectrum, as is a quatricide, but again, runs the risk of damaging toys, and also want to make sure they are completely rinsed as you don't want those chemicals inside your body. Personally, i go the direction of removing pathogens (soap and water) vs killing bacteria or destroying virus.

Might wanna ask vs assume when it comes to poppers. If He has never used them, and is unfamiliar with them, he may see them differently from you. If he is nervous about taking his first load, he might also be nervous about taking his first poppers? i'd taken a lot of cock prior to experiencing poppers, but i have a no drugs, no alcohol background, may wanna discuss it with him. Otherwise, reading all your posts, i cannot imagine a better person for his first experience taking a load. You are thoughtful, considerate and genuinely care about this guy, so it seems the best he could hope for. He's not a virgin, nor is his hole, so he'll just take more time to open... but he is made for cock, eh? So he will open eventually. To me, your attitude is key. i can feel it when a Top is anxious to get in... re cock, that ceased to be an issue long ago, but it still matters if He is opening me with a large toy or His hand. As other's have mentioned, let him be and feel control about You getting in. If his bottom wiring is anything like mine, once he is opened and You are in, You own him and his hole. It's gaining that ownership that takes care, understanding and skill, and You seem to have that.

A few random thoughts. i'm seeing this thread in the "General Discussion" forum, so i am not taking it as specifically speaking of "chasing/gifting," but a more general question about BB? Like hntnhole, i find it curious that the OP has been on BZ since 2014, but also see he has only made 7 posts, so i can see where he may have joined and then has not been active. Since you state you "...can't go back to using rubbers," it seems your screen name is outdated lol (i.e., you are no longer a "virgin.") In other responses, i'm reading words like "addictive" and "promiscuous." Both of those words strike and off key chord in me. Probably because, for me, they are labels used pejoratively by both heteronormative and religious culture, and i grouse at letting them set or own the standard. If one needs eight glasses of water a day to be healthy, is it addiction? Is the quantity excessive? i think a lot of the confusion and conflict we feel is when our reality comes up against someone else's reality, and they treat their reality as the standard for all. That is ego and ethnocentric. Fuck that. They don't get to define us, we do.

This question has a lot of angles for me and doesn't have a simple answer. i guess i don't qualify as a "cumpig" because i want to receive and experience as much of the Man as i can. While His cum is an important part of Him that i want/need left inside of me, i do not disconnect it from the rest of Him. While i admit to putting the contents of used condoms in my hole, it's not the same for me, sort of a form of masturbation for me? For me, getting fucked by a Man involves several things: first, His desire/need to fuck and breed. If a Man doesn't want me and is just going through the motions, it's missing something vital for me. Secondly, His orgasm. i find i am wired in such a way that it's like His orgasm becomes my orgasm, like it leaves His body and enters mine. Weird, i know but there is something very satisfying and fulfilling for me about being the receiver of His orgasm. Honestly, i cannot tell the quality of how much a Man cums when it happens, especially when His orgasm causes Him to thrust deep to deposit His seed deep. i want it as deep as i can get it, and i hold it and want to absorb it. i'm not one to "push" His cum out of me, so quantity is usually an unknown for me. What is significant for me is that His orgasm is full and complete, that He has emptied Himself into me and that makes me a sort of container for Him. Which is not to say that the idea of quantity is not a turn on for me, it is. But without pushing it out, quantity is hard to quantify lol. i'm of the belief that a Mans cum, when absorbed, has an effect on the brain. There have been studies that substantiate this between men and women, so it's unsubstantiated belief on my part, but i think cum has a bonding quality to it. On a separate, but for me related, note. For me, piss can run a close second to cum. It can involve a lot of the same elements for me, if the Man is into it. While it does not involve orgasm on His part, there is a pleasure and release a Man gets when He pisses. There's also a mind fuck element that can be very bonding. There's a impregnating factor. When i hold and absorb a Mans piss, i can smell that He has impregnated me when i pee, it can be pretty fucking awesome. Also, there is quantity side to piss that cannot compare to cum. Every Man can piss more than He can cum lol. Because of the quantity, i can feel when a Man is pissing in me and it leaves me with a full feeling.

Ha... in context of the op question, that would make all of us demons and members of the "Department of enforcement and punishment," which seems to hit the mark to me.

Right? i encounter this all the time. Screen name: "Topforyou" or "Cockforyou" or "Dickinyou", then you read the profile and it's all about him wanting to get fucked lol. my screen name is positionally neutral, but my profiles so clearly spell out i'm total bottom, both pics and words. i rarely even have a pic with my penis in it, but i do have several with it tucked. lol, i usually put those in the 'private' pics section because they're pretty kinky and not everyone will understand those pics without some conversation.

Seeing your name on a gay site, being married does not occur to me, i immediately think you are in chastity... maybe a double entendre? Ditto Bootman. i get it. i was married to a woman 31 years. my freedom came when i finally figured out that my very real cage was not my marriage, but the beliefs that kept me married, not the marriage itself.

"WASHINGTON, Aug 4 (Reuters) - Visa (V.N) and Mastercard (MA.N) on Thursday said they had suspended ties with the advertisement arm of MindGeek, owner of website Pornhub, after a lawsuit raised questions over whether the payment firms could be facilitating child pornography. A federal judge in California last week rejected Visa's motion to dismiss a lawsuit by a woman who alleges the company facilitated the distribution of child pornography on Pornhub and other websites run by its parent company MindGeek." [think before following links] https://www.reuters.com/business/finance/mastercard-visa-suspend-ties-with-ad-arm-pornhub-owner-mindgeek-2022-08-04/?utm_source=ground.news&utm_medium=referral

i'm curious why you would be looking for this kind of information on a primarily gay website dedicated to bareback sex? Wouldn't religious sites, for example, be a better place to look for that kind of info? Why did you ask here? my question is not meant as a challenge, i really am wondering why you ask that here?

Thought i'd start a (hopefully) fun thread on screen names guys use on gay sites and how they impact those who read them. i've used "tallslenderguy" for many years for it's descriptiveness. It's straight forward, describes a little about me and is neutral. Some make me smile, some make me hot. Others make me roll my eyes, like when i see the same profile on Squirt , or some similar locale, for 10 years: "virginass." Anyone else have thoughts like: "whoa, he still hasn't gotten laid?" lol. Obviously, some guys come up with their names in the heat of the moment without thought of the future. There's tons of examples, thought it might be fun to start a thread about them. What are some of the names you've encountered, and how they affect you?

i can see this. What i read is You are and like being Dominate with men and Men, sexually, particularly when it comes to sucking cock. Are you in a "minority?" i think it depends on how You look at it. With Men in general and generically, i think not. With gay men, i think so. We come up with terms to try and communicate our self to other people, but i think the reality is, no two people are exactly alike. Two people using the same label "Top" are still gonna vary to some degree. Your post reads to me like You have no interest in "Cock," and further, that a particular desire/need in You is touched, maybe met, by Men who are Tops who will suck cock. To me, You sound like You are on the far end of the Top/bottom, D/s spectrum. And, in my experience, the farther one gets on one end or the other, the fewer there are. i think we are all unique, but not in this way. i don't think we are unique in our individual components (e.g., there are lots of 'Total Tops') but our uniqueness is in how attributes like being Total Top, total bottom, versatile, etc., ad infinitum, combine with all of our other attributes. To make it even more complex, life is fluid.

Bout 5 minutes ago. He texted me while i was responding to a thread here. i anticipated Him though, so was already cleaned out. Same FB i've written about the last several posts on this thread. He's pretty much been my FB during the pandemic, and i'm grateful to have Him as a FB, He's really sweet and so full of cum. i told Him after it felt like He left a gallon of His seed in me, He replied: "that's the idea." Fuck, lucky chemistry for us. i just took a friend to the airport last night after a week long visit. A guy i love, we allgn in several areas, but His primary sexuality is oral (on ass) and using His hand. i love that too, but after a point that is foreplay for me and i have to have Cock and what comes out of it. i think i need something physical of the Man who fucks me placed inside of me..., i need to be bred. Ultimately, there is no substitute for a Man with a Cock who needs/wants to breed, and this FB is one of those types of Men, and apparently i'm His type of bottom because He keeps wanting to plant His seed in me.

lol, yep, heard (and honestly had) that fantasy too, but never done it. i hate UTI's and that's just asking for one, but as you say: "still...."

Ditto info and warnings about bacteria and infection. i seem particularly vulnerable to urinary tract infection (UTI). Even though i'm a nurse and know how to do sterile technique, i got a UTI when i made a vid for a Man who was long distance and online, we had several D/s kinks in common and one was He wanted me to be catheterized. He had a fantasy of cathing Himself and inserting the exit end of the cath deep inside of me so His piss would naturally empty into my gut, and then He wanted to drink my pee. The idea was He was using my body to "distill" His piss. Thing is, when your hormones get racing, and we are talking inserting things into the urethra for sexual reasons, it's very easy to break sterile technique and introduce bacteria. Sounding can turn into a sort of fucking your penis thing, which means not just inserting the sound, but pushing it in and out. Each time you push the sound in, there is a risk of introducing bacteria. Cleaning the equipment is only half the sterile technique, you also have to sterilize the tip of the penis and the hands that are inserting it. Once you touch anything outside the "sterile field," sterile technique is broken and rest of infection increases. That said sounding can be another way to stimulate the prostate. The prostate gland surrounds the urethra so it can infuse seminal fluid into semen, so it can be manipulated and stimulated via the urethra. While i understand the appeal, for me emotionally/psychologically, i see a cock as a penetrative organ. i like when a Man doesn't see mine as such. i suppose with the right approach, a Top could use it as a way of penetrating me, but it's hard for me to imagine because it would be using my penis for pleasure and i like being conditioned to only using my hole as a receptive organ for Cock.

Right? i think the impediment is fundamentalism, whether it's christian, islam, judaism, they all have fundamentalist sects, and those are the guys that end up putting gays in jail or flying jets into buildings. They remove their "self" from the equation and manage to think and operate as though somehow they know what "God" thinks and wants. It's a really weird detach, but they are convinced we just have not seen as they have. i think they "fall" all the time, really, that their attitude is fallen, they just don't see it.

For me, the word doesn't matter really, it's the attitude of the guy using the word, and what he is trying to convey. For instance, i've heard/read some guys (top and bottom) use "pussy" and mean it in a derogative, demeaning way, and it's a turn off and shut down for me. On the other hand, I've heard/read some guys (Top and bottom), where it's an expression of lust and their thrill of being and fucking with the other person. i will not receive or breed with a guy who is conveying contempt for me (and, i think, indirectly, himself). To me, a big part of fucking is experiencing the symbiosis of mutual desire for the other. If that's not there, i'd rather go without. So, for me, it's not the words, but what the user is conveying, and that's not a standard thing.

lol, ironically, i learned some Greek when i was part of a religious culture. i thought i remembered from other posts you have made that you are Greek? Wow, that is very cool information about "erastis" and "eromenos." It's interesting to me to consider the ebb and flow of different cultures. Part of cultural ethnocentricity seems to be each culture seems to consider the current as the most advanced (progressive?), yet in many ways, that just doesn't bear out. When is comes to male with male sex, 'ancient' Greek culture seems a lot more "progressive."

Not that this can be done on a practical or multiple basis, but we are learning it is possible to erradicate HIV from infected people. "The latest patient, the fourth to be cured in this way, is known as the "City of Hope" patient after the U.S. facility in Duarte, California, where he was treated, because he does not want to be identified. As well as being the oldest, the patient has also had HIV the longest, having been diagnosed in 1988 with what he described as a "death sentence" that killed many of his friends. He has been on antiretroviral therapy (ART) to control his condition for more than 30 years." [think before following links] https://www.ctvnews.ca/health/fourth-and-oldest-patient-yet-cured-of-hiv-according-to-researchers-1.6004148?utm_source=ground.news&utm_medium=referral

i think the Greeks have/had the language/word things more right. As hntnhole points out, they have several words for love. For instance "phileo" is descriptive of friendship love, while "eros" speaks to sexual love. At least it seems their language is more detailed in its meaning. i don't think "love requires" anything, i think people require, and love is a word we use to try and convey a feeling. i think there are moments we can experience of perfect, or near perfect connection/communication, i think that is an ongoing pursuit though, versus a constant we reach and stay at.

my sub side doesn't present to everyone. It is always a part of me, but it's a part of me that is mostly responsive to a Guy with certain attributes. i sent a short, introductory message to a Guy on a site just yesterday who had "Dom" in his screen name. His only response was "so, you gonna be my remote slave, or what?" lol, that was a total shut down for me. i wrote back that i don't make such a commitment to a total stranger and wished him luck. To me, D/s is a natural attraction and bonding of opposites, yin/yang. As you note, there have been myriad terms used to try and describe this at different times in history, in different cultures, but i think the underlying reality of opposites in life, nature, is a constant. While i think there are broad, general commonalities between 'subs' and "Doms,' the reality is we're all individuals and even our individuality is fluid. From what i have experienced, there are a lot of guys in the D/s community who want to have (their) static definition of Dom or sub as the standard that, if deviated from, disqualifies another as D or s. It seems to me that there are some things about you that attract the "Dom" in question, and other things that make Him want to be "done with." But we are all a mixed bag, eh? i doubt there is such a thing as a perfect fit, so in relationship i look for Guys who are self aware and can articulate Their thoughts, needs, desires, identity, etc.. To me, that's a way we can discover if we have enough compatibility to connect, and maybe even bond. A lot of guys opt for short term connects vs long term bonding. i think there are advantages to both. The first is easier, quicker, the latter has more potential for depth.

On another note. i work at a hospital too and there is a group of guy nurses who hang together all the time. They fish and hunt together, have lunch together on their breaks, and endlessly talk sports with each other. They obviously have affection for each other, all of them are married to women. They, and many of their co-workers, frequently refer to their relationship as "bromance." I've even wondered if one of them is bi because he frequently mentions when he thinks another guy is sexy or handsome. If i had to guess, i'd say none of these guys has ever had male on male sex.

i think a lot of confusion that we can experience in life can be traced to our notions of what should be vs the reality of what is. As humans, we use words to facilitate communication, but words are not the end all. We cannot realistically use a static term to describe the fluid state that is life. i'd think trying to fit all men into one of two categories, "gay" or "straight," would be a source of a great deal of confusion. i don't think it reflects reality. Words are an attempt to convey what is, we define them. i think we get into trouble when we try to conform or make them define us. The fact that the term "bromance" even exists, to me, means it's "a thing" to those who use the term to try and communicate their feelings, desires, experience, etc., but it does not necessarily mean the same exact thing to everyone who uses the term. For instance, you don't have to go to far to find examples of literal brothers who have romantic feelings for each other and are having sex. i know that's not what you were referring to, but it illustrates how broad human experience can be and how limited and generic the terms we use to try and communicate are.