tallslenderguy

Ah babe, i think you are over thinking it when you think you say it "...feels like I failed the Top by spoiling his expectation of enjoying a long fuck...." my experience from when i was married is that orgasm control is in the mind (i trained myself never to cum before my wife). Of course, i'm gay and a sub bottom, so that may have added to my ability to control myself lol. my point is i think these guys were very turned on mentally and emotionally, not just physically, and that triggered them. Yep, i'd say it's a compliment ;-). i'd be willing to bet that if you get repeat fucks with these guys, if they normally take longer, you'll get a longer fuck eventually. To me, it's never a fail when a Top cums.

i don't personally think there is any one standard definition for Top or bottom, Dom or sub. i think all Tops, bottoms, Dom's, subs, have things in common, but that doesn't mean they're all the same. To me, it's all about chemistry. i have a sub nature, i can trace it back to age 7. But it's not cookie cutter, i'm an individual. i questioned for awhile just how sub i am, because i didn't fit other's ideas of "sub." Then i started meeting Dom guys who were an awesome fit, the Yang to my yin and i realized that variety is an awesome thing. Not all bottoms are "sub," not all Tops "Dom." And there's probably an infinite number of variations and combinations of those. i think the best relationships involve self knowledge and the ability to articulate... i.e., communication. To me, relationship is all about connecting, as deeply and completely as possible. To that end, i'd suggest you talk to your boyfriend. Tell Him what you are telling us, how much you want to make sure he "...is taken care of and that He cums as much as He needs to." You might discover that He loves how much you love and need His cock. i'm convinced communication is key... i can't count the number of times i've been wrong when i tried to mind read, but it's funny how often we expect to be able to or our partner thinks we should 'just know.' ❤️

i was talking to a Dom guy for recently and our conversations inspired me to buy a couple of micro cages (see below). Pretty unusual for me as i am typically so psychologically sub that i don't like the idea of caging myself lol. sigh. Anyway, i got excited enough about the idea that i went to Amazon and bought a couple of micros. i've worn 'normal' sized cages before with a short place for the shaft of a penis. i'm not huge, but not tiny either, so was curious how it all would work fitting it all in. i wore the first one for a few hours today and gotta say i was surprised on a couple of levels. One is how comfortable it was. It seemed to sort of push part of the penis into the body and with it on it looked like i had a button (dare i say "clit"?). The real surprise was it actually felt comforting to wear... wasn't prepared for that. From the pics you can see both are made to accommodate a hollow urethral plug, which while i find hot, am not sure about the practicality of that long term? Wondering about infection? So i wore it without the urethral insert since it can be worn either way. i noticed after a few hours of wearing it while working in the yard that the skin on the tip of my penis was pushing through the hole made for the urethral plug. i removed it an saw that i was at the beginning stage of getting a pressure wound. Curious if anyone else has encountered this? i didn't try to urinate while wearing it, but my urethra definitely wasn't lined up with the hole in the cage, so i could see that as being potentially messy long term. Except for the pressure wound issue, i could see how this could be a long term thing. i was surprised that it didn't feel restrained, but more like i was being kept small... hard to explain the difference, but it seemed more controlling to me. i didn't get aroused, so i have no idea how it would feel if i got engorged. https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B07FQBWVX1/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o01_s01?ie=UTF8&th=1 https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B01M00CGRJ/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o01_s00?ie=UTF8&th=1

The sigh, gasp, moment when my Top transfers His orgasm from Him to me. For me, orgasm is the culmination of a whole lot of things. Depending on the connection we have, He can be inseminating my mind and emotions as well as my body. i also love it when the Top is so intent on leaving Himself inside of me me, marking me, that after coming He also stays to fill me with His piss. For me, it's His obvious intent to leave as much of Himself inside of me that totally makes me wild and His.

This is a picture of the rectum and sigmoid colon. The rectum is between 4.5 to ~6 inches in length before it becomes the sigmoid colon. The sigmoid colon curves back downward, so your cock is hitting the curve and going into the sigmoid colon... there isn't an actual sphincter. Everyones anatomy is a little different, some have longer rectums, some have a more dramatic curve connecting the rectum and sigmoid. What's happening is your cock is hitting that curve and entering the sigmoid, some deeper, some not as far depending on their particular anatomy. i have a long dildo snake (17") that i have fed all the way in my pussy. Tops who are well hung hit my curve and it hurts if they pound it a certain way, sort of like a Top will do by withdrawing from my pussy opening and reentering, out and in. Others sense the curve and slowly enter my second hole, straightening the curve with their hard cock and then fucking my second hole with the end of their cock. i can feel the pressure at the bend that the Top is straightening with their hard cock, and they can feel the pressure of that straightened bend on their cock. i love the feel when a Top gets through then fucks me deep, they are fucking my gut vs just pounding at the curve and withdrawing.

Cherokee Park.

It's a strategy i suppose, but it's sort of like loading the chamber of a gun with fewer buletts before pulling he trigger. Taking this site as a microcosm, we know there are guys out there intent on pozzing other guys. I.e., people lie. Taking PreP pretty much covers that because you know whether or not you are taking meds... that's difficult to confirm with a hook up.

Ha, interesting question. There's a few complicated ways to answer this question, but the simple answer is "no." U=U is based on several long term studies and no doubt there were guys in the studies who were cumbuckets. I.e., the study evidence is not based on people just taking one load at a time. Ditto the PreP advice. Still a good idea to take Prep, people lie.

Prolly wouldn't make it to court where it happened to me either today (Virginia), i was arrested in '98, and even then things were changing, the cop who arrested me and later apologized seemed genuinely embarrassed (he should have been) and i was charged using a 100 year old law. That probably doesn't even exist anymore.

i'm the only one who voted "other." These days i have most of my success at 'adult shops' that have booths and glory holes. If i go at quitting time or lunch break, i can usually get 4 or 5 cocks in rapid sucksession. Guys outside the booth can hear the rhythm of fucking and pounding against the dividing wall as fucking through a GH happens. i usually start of sucking, but almost always present my hole for seeding once the other guy is arroused. Some won't, but more often than not, they'll slide right into my ready hole and finish by breeding me. ABS are hit and miss though, like any place else. CL used to be a decent source for me for anonymous walk in breeding, but of course there are flakes there. Internet apps are a breeding ground for flakes instead of just being a breeding ground.

i was living in Virginia in '98, (cute) under cover vice cops would go to cruising areas and entrap gays. i chatted one up and asked him to fuck me and he arrested me on the spot. i was taken to the police station, hand cuffed in the back of a police car, finger printed, mug shot. Was charged with a felony using a 100 year old law. i was married and on the DL at the time, scared the hell out of me. i hired a very expensive lawyer who specialized in that sort of thing. It took a year for it to come to trial. The attorney general at the time was extremely homophobic and instructed all prosecutors to go for blood in such cases. The judge just rolled his eyes and asked my lawyer, "what do you wanna do?" my lawyer replied: "I don't know judge, what do you think." The judge said, "how about reduced to indecent exposure" (a misdemeanor), and my lawyer agreed. i paid a $500 fine and it's on my permanent record. There was no "indecent exposure," i was busted for asking a cop to fuck me, it was just a way to reduce the sentence. i am a nurse and have to explain this every time i get a job because it comes up on background. i could get it expunged because, essentially, i was arrested for being gay... but i'd still have to report it as a healthcare worker, expunged or not. At the trial, the arresting officer actually found me ahead of the trial and apologized to me for arresting me. i've never had a problem getting a state license to practice or get a job once i explain, but it is pretty embarrassing to have to explain.

Yes. For me, the bigger part of sex is psychological (which is not to imply the physical isn't a big deal, it is, just that the mind fuck is bigger for me). i often will go a week to ten days without cumming. Not because i can't or don't want to, but my ideal is to cum from being fucked by a Top guy who wants to be in control of His and my pleasure. i will edge for hours and not cum because i want to be and stay horny for my Top. i actually feel disappointed if i cum on my own, and really the only fulfilling way is if i cum from a Top fucking me with His mind or intent engaged in the process. i love the Dom/sub dynamic and feel like i've sort of cheated that dynamic when i masturbate. Of course, with out a steady Top or Dom person in my life who is wired similarly, i end up disappointed a lot lol.

Watched "Undressing Israel, Gay Men in the Promised Land" recently. After watching it, i bought a t-shirt that says "Tel Aviv" on it. Really like the idea of visiting, i had a great experience with a Jewish Dom guy and He left such an awesome impression, wish He was in my life... He visits Israel often.

Good advice. They're both vasodilators, so take care guys.

A 'subtle Dom.' One that is all about the mind fuck, and uses His and my body to accomplish that end. i often hesitate at using words like "Dom" or "sub" because they have such highly personalized meaning for people. my idea seems to be a minority view within a sub culture, but i have met enough of this type of Dom to know they exist. As a matter of fact, it's exactly this kind of guy who demonstrated to me that i'm sub. He's all Top, He is a penetrator by nature, is driven to create and control. He's affectionate and matter of fact about what He wants/needs, almost presumptuous. He doesn't have to force or bully because He knows my needs are dependent on Him. He's an excellent communicator, which is not to say He is talkative, but He listens with His eye, ears and instincts because He knows knowledge is power and power is control. He believes that relationship is about compatability, not compromise, that a D/s relationship is symbiotic. i believe relationship is a two way street, a delicate dance, something that i know many in D/s settings do not believe or practice. In that vein, i believe to have an ideal Top, i have to know how to communicate too.

Well, there is no way to know 100%, but by your description, sure sounds like he bred you. What i find particularly hot is that he tried to make it seem like he watied till he pulls out to cum. When i get bred, i love having a mans semen in me, but i equally (maybe more?) love His orgasm in me, the pleasure of Him cumming. i also have wiring for being dommed and getting bred in that way hits a lot of my notes. The idea that a guy can't help himself when He cums in me is awesome.

You may be right, i should have put a question mark at the end of that last statement and made it more of a question. When i think about it, fuckng is such a different process than defecating. All of the science is on the latter, not the former process. It may be that fucking and hole training can change things. It's hard for me to imagine that an opened and stretched hole would work differently than one that's just used to get rid of waste. Either way, glad you were able to to affect things and get a response where you were not pushing Him out. My own desire is to get a swallowing effect from my pussy lol.

okay, i'm going to be a disinter. What i read here doesn't strike me as being "just a hole." When i think of "just a hole," i think of an inanimate object, something not alive. i don't see that here, i think a huge part of the thrill is conquering and being conquered, and that doesn't happen with just a hole. It may be that a lot of us have already been conquered to varying degrees, but we still represent guys who crave to be used by guys who crave to use us?

lmao. yeah, he may indeed be an idiot. And i think it's really hot that fucking causes such a dramatic, involuntary response. i think "Dom" is a mental/emotional disposition, not a physiological one. To me, one of the hot dynamics of D/s is the Dom's subjugation of the sub. Ok, this may be stretching things (so to speak), but i like to think of my rectum as every bit the sex organ as a womans vagina. Both are used for 'waste removal', though a womans process of waste removal is less frequent, it lasts about a week. find91 is right though, it's a physiological response. "After the defecation reflex is triggered, you can either delay or defecate. Delay occurs when a person doesn’t go to the bathroom immediately. There are muscles in the anal sphincter that cause the stool to move backward slightly. This effect reduces the urge to defecate. If you choose to defecate, your brain activates voluntary and involuntary muscles to move stool forward and out of your body." When a guy has His cock in an ass, the delay reflex cannot work because the cock is attached to the Top and cannot "move back sightly" with the resultant relaxing.

Whole hearted agreement here (but i ran out of permission to use those little hearts for the day). Seriously, every sex organ on the human body has the dual function of sex and waste removal. Culture doesn't look at a woman's period as a measure of whether her vagina "works properly," so i'm not going to measure my pussy the way either. i fucking love when i have to run to the bathroom because i have a pussy more than an ass hole, i love that reminder.

When flaccid and warm, my testicles and penis all hang fairly equally, like a little bunch of grapes. If my penis is engorged, my testicles seem to want to hide up inside of me, they sort of disappear and don't "hang" at all.

i've seen some pretty big ball sacks at the hospital where work, we call it "edema." If you do something like inject saline or pump, it won't generally last. If your body is working right, it will absorb the excess fluid that causes the swelling, our bodies are always working to maintain homeostasis (balance). As a bottom with a decided sub side, i love big balls and low hangers on another guy. my testicles tend to float up into my body, and honestly, given my bottom/sub nature, i kinda like that. i relate big balls and low hangers to being Top and/or Dom, so i love them on other guys and also love that they are not prominent on me. i am deeply drawn to the attraction energy of opposites.

my mind. i'm thoroughly into mind fuck, so i try to exercise my mind a lot. The challenge is i hate to exercise solo, and prefer exercising with a trainer.

Fuck, i so love you. For me, it's pretty much all about the Top wanting/needing to "sculpt" my hole. It is the energy, need, desire behind that that connects to my 'sub' soul. It's the place where a Dom/Top can not only connect to me, but bond with me... which i see as true 'bondage.' i see a Dom/Top as a guy whos's nature is to penetrate another guy with His self and leave a part of His 'self' there, create something with His signature on it. i see a sub/bottom as one who's nature is to respond and receive that as part of the creative process of nature (is this way too cerebral for a Saturday?). To me, the first type of "rough" isn't rough at all, it's an expression of passion. my visceral response to bullies, on the other hand, or guys who are rough to make their self feel tough is its pretend domination. To me, it's just not real (note, i qualify: "to me"). They may hurt me, but they won't get to my inner sub. In fact, they will drive that part of me away. For me, a "wrecked hole" from a passionate Top who loves/needs/desires to create, inseminate,impregnate, represents the "impregnation." Not a perfect analogy, i know. For me, things like a "wrecked hole" are arguments for ongoing relationship (which is not to suggest monogamy), where a Top can look at His bottoms hole and say: "i'm responsible for that pussy, I made it like that." i had a FB who's intent was to open my hole as part of His creative energy. He worked on it once a week for over a year and a half. A few months into our relationship, i noticed that if i had to use the bathroom, i had more of a sense of urgency, that my hole was no longer tight. When i told my FB He told me that that was because He had changed my hole from an ass hole for shitting into a pussy for fucking. As long as He was using it, it remained that way and every time i had to use the bathroom, it triggered in me that He had turned my hole into His pussy. i didn't think of it as a pussy, but as His. And i didn't consider it the least bit "wrecked", though i get the term makes me hot.

i love your understanding and intelligence. A frustration with being gay and into fucking (for both Tops and bottoms) is the trick of nature that combines sex organs with waste removal. That dual function is true about every sex organ, male or female. i sort of envy the Tops who don't care, or even get into it, if their bottom is not cleaned out. Not because i am into that, but because i am into spontaneous sex. i hate to have to tell a FB i am not cleaned out. i know it is not rational, but with my sub nature, i feel like i have failed them...