tallslenderguy

This guy was (i.e., "aggressive"), but intelligently, and even affectionately so. and he was remarkably powerful with/to me. There are Tops who can fuck and breed with their words and method, and end up "marking and making my pussy" Theirs, without actually having physically fucked or bred me. This Top owns me, even though He never actually put His literal cum inside of me (He was afraid to because i am poz). i don't know how to explain it, but to this day, He "owns" me and i adore Him still. P.S. i love that You love that, it's a way of my putting my scent out there.

i read this this morning before i went to work, and it had the effect of putting me in heat, like a pheromone of sorts. i didn't have a chance to respond this morning because i had to get to work. i work 13 hours and the whole day, anytime i thought of this, it had the effect of turning me on. i got home tonight, and the first thing i wanted to do was respond to this, and that's part of who i am as a bottom, as "responder." i haven't read through any of the replies yet, i first wanted to respond to you. So much of what you say here resonates with me. i'm a bottom and seem to have sub in me, but i do not identify as "garbage." i know for a fact there are Top men who would not take pleasure in that, and some who do. One reason is "garbage" may not really show off who the top is, like setting a diamond in a plastic setting. i come from a conservative, religious background and was married to a woman. It took a long time for me to figure out and accept myself. i do not try to conform to anyone's idea of who i should be. Also, i am not suggesting there is a right a wrong here, i think there are a lot of shades and variations of both top and bottom, dom and sub. For me, submitting is something i (always) give, it's never taken... which is not to suggest that the top always has to ask permission for every act. That's one of the great things about relationship to me, my position of submission is forged and deepened in relationship. An example (and desire) i have used before is being available for my top, even when i am asleep. As fun as it may sound on some levels, the idea of a stranger breaking into my house and raping me just doesn't work. I have a second degree black belt and would probably kick the hell out of that person, instinctively. On the other hand, a top that i have a relationship with would get a very different response because i'd belong to him and i don't feel that belonging to a stranger. i appreciate the distinction you make between alpha and beta males. While i do not see it as a black or white thing, i definitely see differences between tops. One of the differences that is very meaningful for me is tops who are not only physically alpha but intellectually and emotionally as well. While we use terms taken from the animal kingdom to try and describe ourselves, people, in part, differ from animals because of the intellectual and emotional components we bring to relationship. For me, it is not only the cum that a top puts in me that makes me want to submit and become his, it's the man doing it. i am the same way, from the bottom side, i.e., it's my hole he is using to 'breed' and 'own' me, not my "mouth." Not to say i don't suck cock, it's just not the same. And for me, it's not just his cum, but what ever cums from his body (e.g., i feel impregnated by his piss too, if it's something he made with his body and wants to breed me with) For me, a top breeds and inseminates me with more that his physical essence, he also breeds me with his thoughts and emotions... it's hard to explain. For me, the ownership you speak of is like being impregnated, and a top can have more than his cock and cum to 'impregnate' and "own" me with. i had a top once who had me so intellectually and emotionally inseminated by him that just walking down the street, he reached over and nonchalantly put his hand in the back of my pants and ran his finger along his crack, and he owned me. You see, i couldn't even write "my crack" because it didn't feel right. He had me so thoroughly captivated that just that gesture made me want to be his, made me feel and think owned. i adored him and couldn't help it (nor did i want to help it). That to me is the natural course of top/bottom , not a forced or manufactured thing.

Hot, i've never thought of this. As a bottom, i am hugely turned on by a Top with a cock piercing. There is something very assertive an Top about it to me, so i wouldn't be inclince to get something that would draw attention to my penis, i like when a Top minimizes my penis as part of the chemistry. But i can see how a taint piercing could be viewed as more of a bottom thing, presenting more as part of the ass than cock.

It's hard for me to imagine people like this exist in 2018, that there is this much ignorance with the existence of google? You can catch STD's from pre cum. It's an emotional compromise, not a rational one, no matter what kind of mental gymnastics a person goes through to reach that option. i do kinda like the answers that suggest it might be a sort of mind fuck thing though, on either side. i love mind fuck. The first time a fb pissed in me, He didn't ask or tell me He was going to do it. i was face down and on my stomach, which for me is the most vulnerable position for a bottom to be in (other than restrained). After he came deep, he relaxed His weight on top of me and sort of spread out his body a little more to cover me. After a bit, i felt His cock and balls twitch and started feeling the warmth and fullness that comes with being filled with piss. At first i was startled, but He knew me well enough to know i'd really want whatever He was filling me with. He continued to assert His weight on me and whispered, talking dirty to me and telling me: "let me, it's feels so good and i want you to be my little piss slut..." i immediately got turned on and fully submitted and was extremely happy afterward... and He knew it.

To me, all cocks (i.e., size doesn't matter to me), and the men who possess them, are awesome. For me, it's the drive within the Top that matters, His cock is just how He expresses that desire. I'd rather be fucked by a Top with a 12 inch desire to penetrate and breed with a 3 inch cock than the reverse. If a facility is built for sex, it only makes sense that it should be constructed with understanding. Many facilities are simply built for making money, with a blind eye towards accommodation of the customer.

Straight people should be more open minded, they have a hell of a lot more advantages. No one has to ever defend themselves because they are straight, or hide or fear. Gay people are just beginning to get those kinds of freedoms, and as you note earlier, they are not universal by any stretch of the imagination, eh? i absolutely love that there are people like you out here, pushing the boundaries, asking questions, asking "why" and "why not." As to discussion about barebacking. There is so much about this that is unconscious. Despite the fact that HIV is no longer a killer disease, thanks to modern science, there is still a lot of fear and ignorance about it. HIV is sort of in the category of herpes now, a non curable, but manageable, std. The truth is, when a person takes the right meds, HIV is not transmissible, and there is no such med for herpes. But even though HIV is no longer the threat it was during the 80's and early 90's, that's where many peoples emotions (and even heads) are when it comes to thinking about it. The truth is, if one is not in Africa, HIV is more prominent as a gay disease than straight. That fuels fear and prejudice in both the straight and gay community (the gay community still has plenty of issues inherited from toxic roots) In my mind, PreP is sort of like the polio vaccine was when it was first developed. If we could get everyone who is at risk on it, we could similarly irradiate HIV. i don't agree with them, but i love "chasers" for their sheer emotional rebellion against being caged by a disease. Personally, i think there are better ways to assert solidarity and individuality than catching a disease, but i adore the sentiment. The reason i am saying all this stuff about HIV (and i am a medical professional, so i have that perspective as well) is because in your opening comment you state: "Btw, we all three are neg and plan on staying that way." i want you to stay neg and am glad you want to stay that way. That's part of the reason why, even though i am poz, i am on meds and get tested regularly to make sure my HIV stays suppressed and untransmissalble. Based on current scientific evidence, no one is going to get HIV from me. i'd suggest, if you are not already on PreP, that to do so would be a part of a rational "plan on staying" neg. i got pozzed by a negative Top lol. Either he was lying, or simply didn't know, but my methods to stay neg weren't very effective lol. As you mention, there is no 100% way to ensure that the guys you are having sex with are all they say or think they are. PreP (and suppression if poz) are evidence based preventative measures. To me, HIV meds are a boon to the gay community. They provide a way for us to assert both our freedom and our sexuality without any threat to ourselves or society. i'm gay and a bottom who's sexuality includes receiving a mans semen into me. i do not want my partner to be restricted in his drive to breed, or me (or anyone) to be restricted, so i have pretty much always refused to cage (or require my partner) His sexuality in a condom. Giving and taking semen is part of gays way of sustaining who we are, even if it doesn't produce babies, it sustains something vital. i'm for promoting ways of exercising who we are that preserves and enhances us, not weakens or kills us off.

i haven't read the rest of the replies yet, so sorry if this turns out to be redundant. What you describe sounds polyamorous to me and not "strange" at all. I'd suggest you try polyamory sites for additional conversation and input. Gay relationship has not had the social advantages for evolution that straights have, i think we are at the beginning of figuring stuff out, but it can be a fun adventure and i appreciate what you are doing. i think an advantage can be that we don't have to start with preconceived notions adopted from the straight world (not saying you are doing that, but that sort of thing can be subtle). i suspect there are a lot more of us open to such relationships than any of us realizes. Many haven't "realized" it (yet?) because we haven't tried it? Idk. But i applaud your trying and discussing it. To me what you describe is just more refined and relationship oriented vs just hooking up. i don't think this has to do with quantity so much as it has to do with quality. i'm a bottom and similarly relationship oriented? For instance, i much prefer fb's to trying to arrange a hook up with someone i've never met. To me, having fb's is sort of in between poly and hook up sex, because there is a form of relationship between the Top and bottom, but they don't have relationships with each others fb's. i also am a bottom with decided sub tendencies. For instance, the idea of sleeping (literally) with a Top who i have the trust, because of relationship, where He can penetrate me anytime He needs or wants is very appealing. i'm literally imagining being asleep with this person and waking up in the middle of the night to Him sliding in. i have no doubt there are plenty of bottoms who would love that arrangement. You'll note that i identify "trust" and "relationship" as part of the ingredients, i think there are Tops and bottoms who want that. i also think that "fluid and honest communication" would be part of building something like that. i love kinky and imaginative sex that incorporates 'mind fuck,' that can be hard, or impossible, to explore in any depth with a hook up. i am not suggesting there is a right or wrong way to do any of this and i love that we are discussing this.

i know, right? As a bottom, i find even the thin walls restrictive, i want to be able to reach through and hold and stroke my Tops balls while i suck Him, and be able to take Him to the hilt. And, when He wants to breed, definitely want Him to have full access to my hole, thick walls and small gh's just do not accommodate that. ABS owners need to do surveys and learn from their customers what works, it'd be revolutionary lol.

I found this info (copied and pasted below) on WebMD... not a government site, but i think it's reliable info in this case. What the Results Mean A high viral load is generally considered about 100,000 copies, but you could have 1 million or more. The virus is at work making copies of itself, and the disease may progress quickly. A lower HIV viral load is below 10,000 copies. The virus probably isn't actively reproducing as fast, and damage to your immune system may be slowed, but this is not optimal.

If you were having sex before the internet, hook up 'sites' were usually public. like several here, i cannot count the number of public places i've been fucked because pretty much any place i had sex was public. Getting fucked in a public restroom or under a stall wall or through a glory hole in a mall was a daily ritual. A couple of places/times do stand out to me though. Once i was driving down a street and a guy pulls up next to me and looks me in the eyes, then pulled ahead and in front of me. i followed him into a Burger King parking lot. He got out, went inside and into the restroom. I followed. When i got in, he pulled my pants down, turned me around, unzipped his jeans, pulled his cock out and spat on it, then pushed in. Didn't take long for him to unload. He pulled out, zipped up and left with me standing in the middle of the restroom floor with my pants around my ankles. The other was a bridge over a river at a public park. It was a fairly long bridge, long enough to where you couldn't recognize someone if they were standing in the middle. I used to stand in the middle of the bridge at dusk, leaning on the rail looking out at the water sort of bent over. I would wear my shorts low enough to where my ass crack was exposed, sort of plummer style, for anyone who might be interested to notice, but not too obvious unless you were really looking. I could see when someone would enter the bridge from the corner of my eye, and if it was a guy and i'd hear him slow or pause as he was walking by, i'd subtly lower my shorts a little more. i was always lubed and ready, Cannot count the number of times a guy would come up behind me, no words exchanged, pull my shorts down to expose my hole, then breed me, finish and continue his walk.

lmao

This topic comes up fairly frequently here, i like all the stuff this community discusses, i think this is a great community. For me it's not the word that matters as much as the attitude and intent. The words we use to communicate are only a small percentage of communication, tone and visual cues make up the bigger part of communication. For instance, i've had guys use the word "cunt" with me and their attitude was pure lust, desire. Other guys say it and convey disdain, which sends a sort of opposite message using the same word. For me, words can serve a deeper purpose: to engage the mind and emotions in sex. Sex (for me) is always more intense with someone who knows how to fuck with their words as well as their body, turning words into another (or extension of their) cock. i see the emotional dynamic between Top/bottom as the Top wanting to take charge and control both His and His bottoms sex, and the bottom as the opposite. The Top the artist, the bottom the piece of art. Lots of analogies, none perfect. i'm not the least bit feminine. i have to tell people i am gay and have a lot more women come on to me than men. i have no desire AT ALL to be a woman, yet can get really turned on by a guy using words like "cunt" with me, depending on how He does it. When it's obvious to me that He is turned on by asserting power, i get turned on too. Force has the opposite effect on me. For me, brute force doesn't work, brings out the testosterone in me and i am liable to deck the guy who tries using it on me lol. But i've had Tops who have worked me (as part of the 'fuck') into a state of desire and then use terms that cause me to associate my state of desire with them. I'm not a cunt or a pussy, but i have had Tops who have mind fucked me into being one, and we both liked it.

i've was around a lot of drugs as a kid. my sister is 3 years older than me and i was sort of her and her best friends mascot. When i was 14, they'd get stoned every day before going to school. They had military boyfriends and they'd often party together with whatever was available, lots of hallucinogens. They'd all offer, i'd always decline. So i've had lots of experience observing people who are stoned. As a critical care nurse, i've also had lots of experience with people where it's gone bad and they have fried brains or hearts. i've cared for lots of people who used meth with completely destroyed hearts (they get ruined heart valves from infections from needles). Between the two experiences and what i have seen, drugs just scare me.

For me, this can work, not because force is necessary, but because of the dynamic that can be had between some Top/bottom guys. i've had Top guys who i had a trust relationship with could do a lot of stuff with. One of my favorite fantasies is being penetrated while i'm asleep, especially by someone i know. i love the idea of a relationship with a Top where we sleep together and any time through the night where He wants, i am there for Him. i love the idea of Him just sliding in any time He wants to unload or piss and just having the kind of connection and situation where He can do that.

Interesting... i know i don't hook as often. i didn't realize how much i used CL until it was gone. i suspect most of the guys who bred me from CL were 'straight' guys looking for a quick, easy hole to breed? Not going to find those guys on a gay app or site. It was pretty much always the same scenario, anonymous walk in where they would find me ass up and naked on my bed. Making it totally anonymous like that, where all they saw was my back side and i didn't see them at all, made a certain 'type' more comfortable? i can't count the hundreds of hook ups i did that way. Even many that became repeat fb's pretty much remained that scenario. CL was always about 50% flakes (if not more), but i also had a ton of successful hook ups, and that kept me using the site. my only semi reliable go to now is the ABS. That can be hit or miss like CL, but there is a definite 'hit' side to it. I think it is a similar crowd, especially depending on the time of day (before work, lunch break, right after work). Not unusual for me to go there and get half a dozen cocks in rapid succession. It''s GH sex, which is kinda hot but also a little frustrating having that wall restrict access. But i've also encountered the guys who live at the ABS, and they can kinda ruin things trying to compete. So weird when some guy will go around closing the doors in the booth next to you so that people will think it's occupied. Kinda pathetic.

Thanks bgr, So far, that's the most comprehensive test i have found, i need a lot more than just a urinalysis to be really tested. Was curious about what they do with gonnorhea since it requires both azithromycin (pills) and a shot of rocephin (i think). Test's in UK seem cheaper, something like 31 pounds for a single test that is $69 here. Even with the exchange difference, i think it's still cheaper in Europe... not surprised, or healthcare system is for profit.

Pretty much any hint that the guy is disingenuous. i hesitate if the guys profile says "versatile." i have nothing against a true versatile, as long as he is in the mood to top. i always ask if it bothers them that i am only bottom. i get frustrated at the number of guys who do not own who they are. Guys who are afraid to say what they want and want me to do all the work of communication. i hate it when a guy expects you to read his mind. Guys who seemingly haven't read my VERY EXPLICIT profile lol (that seems like a common one)

i did a google search "where to find an anal tattoo artist" and got over 3m results. Of course, they're not all artists, butt prolly find some amongst them ?

^^^This^^^ i think there are two sides to sex. The physical and the psychological. As bottoms, we still possess the anatomy and physiology associated with being able to breed and feel the physical pleasure of doing so. Psychologically? We're all over the map. Just read all the stuff written by guys on this site identifying as "bottom." I guess the same could be said about Tops? They too have the same anatomy and physiology as a bottom. Reminds me of the old joke: "if God had wanted men to have sex with each other, he would have given them assholes." So, it would seem to come down to the other head, the one on our shoulders vs the one between our legs. What KptNLine has written is like looking in a mirror for me. my want/desire to cum is strong, but it's almost like a substitute or compromise for my greater desire or want to be on the receiving end (both physically and psychologically). For me, cumming is always a mixed experience. On the one hand, it feels good, but on the other hand it is disappointing for me because , like KptNLine, it makes me less submissive and less horny. It is a physical release, but not a psychological one.

OMG, LMFAO. i have encountered just about every one of these and sometimes have gotten to the point that i am paranoid. I start forming conspiracy theories in my mind like some religious cult has fake guys on gay sites just to frustrate us. For me, one of the worst is when a guy chats you up and asks for your address then ghosts. I cannot count the number of times that's happened. I got to the place with some guys where if i suspected (more paranoia) they weren't legit, i wouldn't give my address, but a cross street, then tell them to text or email me when they got there and i'd give them the address. sigh, i do miss cruising on location.

As in "we hold these truths to be self evident...?" i think, in part, you answer your own question when you say: "I'm not crazy. People don’t have a right to nonconsensual contact with other people. It’s just that in this situation some of us believe that a right exist that is so natural and correct that our consent may be assumed." You imply that nonconsensual sex is "crazy." You list qualifiers that: "in this situation some of us believe...." i've often compared myself to a "bitch in heat." i remember as a kid seeing a bitch in heat and there were about 20 neighborhood male dogs outside her door wanting to breed her. i liked the image lol, so i use it to describe how i feel. As others have pointed out, not all bottoms feel the same way, so if we all suddenly had signs on us that unmistakably labeled us as "bottoms," it still wouldn't mean all bottoms "believe" that a Top has a "right" to breed them. "Belief" is individual, it's not equal to knowledge? For me there is a psychological side to this that may be generally common to all bottoms (and Tops) to some degree or another? I.e., (gay) bottoms want to receive a male into them, and (gay) Tops want to penetrate or put something of their self in another male. To me, that can have myriad expression, but it seems to come down to desire. Tops want to be the creators, the artists and bottoms want to be the creation, the canvas? Tops have a drive to make an impact, bottoms have a drive to be impacted lol. To me, putting it out there that any Top has a right to breed me is just a way increasing my odds of getting bred. Psychologically, i'll take any male who wants to breed me. The only connection i need is their desire to breed. For me, that falls short of them having a "right." For me it is just an expression of yin/yang, of opposites attracting. One of the most extreme fantasies i have is being taken and bred when asleep. Consciously, the fantasy is a total turn on for me. But if i suddenly woke up, surprised by a stranger, i might kick the hell out of them. Sex, being bred, is never a threat to me, but other things might be and if i do not know His intent, i might feel threatened and respond. But if the only intent is sexual Topping, my legs are open.

ok, after some searching i found this test... the one reviewer gave it a bad review, but the company has good ratings elsewhere. It is really expensive but it does cover all the bases, wondering if there are other companies that offer the same? https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01LZAQEVB/ref=nav_timeline_asin?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1

Anyone else ever use a home test for STD's? I have done the online purchase where you go to a lab, but i have noticed there are now tests available that you can do at home and mail in. What i haven't seen is tests that cater to the gay population? I'd like to test more frequently for gonnorhea and chlamydia since they are so common, but that would involve an anal and oral swab and the home tests i have seen test urine. I guess if you get the test for a woman (vaginal swab?) that could be used, but i don't know how site specific the tests are. Ideally, would want to test urethral, anal and oral each time. Anyone have experience using home tests available for those?

i've easily been with over 1000 guys and taken their loads annally over a 30 year period, i didn't become poz until 3 years ago. There seems to be a human desire to be able to put things in black and white terms, to have definitive answers to our questions. i think science, and medical science in particular, has done some amazing things, come up with some remarkable answers. i'm a critical care nurse, so i am in the thick of things when it comes to medicine and healing. i am not a infectious disease specialist, but i practice the healing arts, and certain realities apply to all of us. Right now, the body is an infinite universe. We can narrow things down enough to come up with meds like anti virals, but it doesn't mean we understand or can quantify every aspect of the HIV disease process. Which is to say, while there are things that may be the same for everyone, there are also things that differ and we don't know enough to identify all those things. We do know that we can take a pill and essentially prevent ourselves from getting infected (PreP). We now know that suppressed/undetecable = no risk for transmission. Of course, that doesn't mean that just because a person says they are on Prep or undetectable, that they are telling the truth. The only person you can know about for sure is you. You could take PreP. i'm sure you know all or most of this. Like your self, i thought i knew what i had to do (get on PreP), and i was actually going through the testing process to get on PreP when i found out i am poz. Now i am on meds, undetectable. i didn't want to be poz, but i figure i dodged the bullet for a long time and feel no regrets. To me, it's just all a part of living and i am grateful we live in an era where HIV doesn't mean AID's or the end of sex.

The nature of sexual attraction (or "attraction" period) has a mysterious side to it. i don't fault anyone for not being attracted to me, i don't really see attraction as a choice. i agree that there is a cultural element, but i don't think that's all there is to it? i mean, every caveat we put on our list of who we will fuck, narrows that list down. i don't know of any guy who wants a 'narrowed down list' lol. For various reasons, most of my sex with guys has always been anonymous where they pretty much only see my back side, so looks figures less into it, or just he looks of my back side. And frankly, i'm face down, so looks doesn't figure in to the equation at all for me. Having said that, if a guy wants to kiss, what matters for me changes, just different criteria of attraction. On the occasions when i do breed, age doesn't figure in at all. i have a fb who is getting close to 70 and he has the silkiest, sweetest, well shaped ass. Age just doesn't matter because i am only focused on his ass.