tallslenderguy

i've been here since 2012 and was a lurker prior to that. i don't know of another not hetero discussion forum ike this anywhere? It may be out there, but i have not encountered it. For me, this is sort of like the bars and meeting places non heteronormative's had prior to the internet, but even that pales in comparison when it comes to the variety, substance and quality of some of the discussions that take place here. This place comes as close to a tribal gathering as i can imagine. i wonder if it was face to face if it would even be the same? We'd all likely end up pairing off or in an orgy lol. Here, though, we have physical separation here, so stuff gets examined and discussed. i am so grateful this place and you guys are here.

Cool! To me, it all comes down to individual wiring. Labels like "Top, Dom, bottom, sub, etc., ad infinitum," to my way of thinking are guide lines, not absolute labels that one must conform to. i believe labels/words are there to serve communication, not imprison us. i used the identifiers "bottom with some sub." i qualify 'some' sub, because i have found if i do not qualify, there are some guys who want to define me more than they want to know and possesss me. No judgement on them, but i do not synch with them, and i know it, so i blow them a kiss and wish them luck in their endeavors. With that as a preface: For me, sucking cock is every bit as submissive and bottom for me as getting fucked. For me, any form of penetration is 'bottom' and goes toward 'sub.' i don't rim guys because, the way i am wired, it feels like topping to me because it is still a form of penetration. For me, it is topping to use a finger, tongue, dildo, etc, to penetrate another and vice versa. If i have a cock in my mouth, i am being penetrated and it's bottoming for me. As far as the 'sub' part, the way i am, force of any sort shuts down my sub side. The Dom's who open me, open and elicit the sub in me, do it through seduction, not bullying or force. i may end up getting face fucked, but they sneak up on it or pull it out of me. That's just me, i know we are not all alike. i know there is such a thing as a "submissive top," but i do not relate to that at all. i also do not relate to or respond to force at all, even though i know a lot of guys equate force or bullying with "dom." For me, that is opposite of "dom." For me, being fucked or sucking is 'bottom.' And depending on the Top/Dom, being fucked or sucking can bring out the sub in me. "sub" for me is psychological and is a response i have to a particular kind of 'Dom."

i've never refused, but there was one i was not able to take entirely when i was younger, He had both girth and length. i suspect i would be able to take it now. i had another who had enormous girth, but was not more than 7" long, and i was a little embarrassed the first time with Him because i had to slow Him down at first. i suspect He was accustomed to being turned down, because He'd hit me up frequently. He is the only guy i can think of who i would pre-dilate with a dildo to accommodate Him. He was not one to take time to open me, so i did it before He got there so He could just slide in. Not my favorite way, but that was how He was and i loved Him. He was one of a few guys who literally fucked the cum out of me. i have had many who were massive and had to open me up, but psychologically, i absolutely love that. i love it when a Top purposefully and knowingly opens me to accommodate His cock because, for me, opening me is a huge part of being with a Top. I.e., it's not 'just' the fuck and insemination, but for me, being stretched and opened, having my hole molded and changed by His penetration, is just as big a deal to me as the semen or piss that He puts inside of me. i see opening as a form of insemination and impregnation, that He uses to 'mark' me.

Got the Pfizer vaccine 12/30/20. Only had a sore arm, that's feeling better after about 24 hours, otherwise no other symptoms.

i get my first shot on Wednesday at the end of my shift. Most of the nurses i work with at the hospital post their reaction to the vaccine on FB, so far no one i work with has had any severe response, most just a sore arm that resolves in <24 hours. Some fatigue, but hey, we are nurses working 13 hour shifts in a stressful environment, fatigue comes with the job lol.

Ditto this. It is spot on. i'm a critical care nurse and >1000 hours of direct care experience with Covid poz patients in a critical care setting. Cytokine response syndrome (aka "cytokine storm" or simply "CRS") is the big killer here. We are just starting to figure out the reasons behind who gets this triggered response and who does not. i had two patients a few weeks ago, one relatively young (50) and in good health otherwise, the other was 87 and had several co-morbidities (diabetes, vascular disease, heart disease). The 87 year old started out on high flow O2 equipment where we were forcing ventalation, the other was getting a lessor O2 device. The 87 year old improved at twice the rate of the younger guy. Not only was CRS an emergent factor, it also seems to have longer term ramifications because of lung injury that can take several months to resolve even after the infection has cleared. We are still learning this disease, it is deadly, and even when it is not, if you happen to be the type that gets the CRS response, you are in for an ugly ride. The vaccine is demonstrating 95% efficacy at this point, i'm getting vaccinated next week (i have to wait when i am off work because there can be side effects), We do not know the long term effects of the vaccine, it's new, but we do know the effects of Covid, so putting it on the scales, i'm going with the vaccine. Covid related deaths are a reality, so far, no one has died from the vaccine. It may happen, and yes, some are going to have worse side effects than others, but comparatively, it's the better bet by far. Science is not perfection, it produces the best evidence we have so far and is an ever ongoing pursuit for more and better evidence.

i'm a critical care nurse and have worked with Covid positive patients since March. i volunteer to care for the positive patients, caring for sick people is my chosen profession. This pandemic has similarities to the AID's crises during the early 80's when we had just discovered the disease. People were afraid then too. Fear and the threat to life and health brings out the best and the worst in people. There are health care workers who refuse to care for Covid patients, just as there were during the AID's crises, and there are some who simply cannot for various reasons. There is already a nursing shortage in the US, and a lot of nurses are burning out because of the pandemic. The hospital where i work has remained so full, it is often on divert because we simply do not have a bed for another patient. This is the reality i have lived since we opened a Covid unit where i work in March 2020. Yet, i still get family members of patients calling me and trying to argue with me that Covid is fake while their loved one is in the Hospital with Covid. It's bizarre. i had one family member rake me over the coals because he had traveled 200 miles to see his brother and hosptial policy would not allow him to visit. His brother was on high-flow O2 which has the effect of aerosolizing the virus and making it more contagious, so people on high flow are not allowed visitors as a containment measure. The guy was verbally abusive and questioning my expertise. He asked: "is Covid worse than a staph infection?" In his mind, he was convinced that he knew something the medical profession did not, and he was trying to trap me with his brilliance. It was not an honest query on his part, in his mind, he already had the answer and he was just trying to nail me. i had to take time away from caring for my patients, trying to explain the infectious process to him, but he would have none of it. That can be really challenging, even with those who want to understand. Learning physiology is an complex degree, not a 10 minute explanation on youtube. my efforts did not matter though because he was not listening. In his mind, he already knew the 'truth' and that made everything else a lie or some sort of evil plot or deception. He was literally attacking and undermining the very people who were trying to keep his brother alive. It's sort of like having a family member with polio and calling the polio vaccine an evil plot to control and take over the world. That is the crux of the problem i believe. There are people in the world who have an absolutist mentality that closes them off from reason or science. Reality can be slapping them in the face, and they will insist that it is wrong in order to preserve their way of thinking and their conclusions. The internet becomes a gathering place where they affirm one another's notions, giving them size and momentum and seeming validity. The internet is a double edged sword. It can be used to find and disseminate valuable information. It can also be used for propaganda and deception. For those interested, The Social Dilemma is a great documentary that explores some of the very things we are talking about here.

i have gotten to the place where i simply politely decline to hook with a versatile guy. i am so clear about being a total bottom in my profiles and in conversations with guys, clear to the point of paranoia lol. i have even referred guys to the urban dictionary definition of total bottom because so many versatile guys are so centric that they truly believe everyone is like them sexually. For me, it's actually sort of triggering because it is so similar to the the attitude of the religious culture i escaped that insisted that being gay is a "choice." i don't equate the two, but i do know who and how i am better than a complete stranger from an online hook up site... if i say i am "total bottom," then who is some stranger to assume i do not know what i am talking about and can some how be something he wants and something i am not? i like to think gay people should know better than to have those kinds of narrow biases or centricity's, but all the prejudice, stereotyping, presumption we experience in the straight world seems to exist in our world as well.

lmao... That is one insecure person who has to brag that way. i've had Tops take a break while fucking me and the fact it's taking them awhile to cum usually makes me afraid and insecure i'm not good enough, not the other way around. i want my Top to really enjoy Himself, but i don't know that i have ever assumed it was the case, i really appreciate when a Top says things or makes sounds that indicate He is enjoying His cock in my pussy (or mouth, for that matter). i definitely moan, can't help it, i LOVE a Man inside of me. i've had to bite my mattress on more than one occasion to keep from telling a Top (and often total stranger): "i love you." lol

i came to a place a long time ago where i don't even try to hook with anyone but a "Top" or "Total Top" and on profiles i identify as "bottom" or "total bottom." Then i am really clear additionally in my profile explanation. my psychology is pretty much wired bottom. i find it really strange that the idea of getting my cock sucked or me fucking another guy leaves me soft, but a guy talking to me about breeding me or wanting me to take his cock gets me hard a rock... just typing that made me start to get hard. my equipment works fine, just isn't there. Adding to the mystery, there is occasionally a guy that i will wanna fuck, but it is so rare that i usually don't even voice it so there is no confusion. i can easily go without fucking or getting sucked, but cannot go without getting fucked or sucking... having that energy of a guy needing/wanting to penetrate and breed me. And i cannot figure out a "type" that can get me wanting to fuck... and it is fuck if i top, getting sucked pretty much does nothing for me, but i love guys asses even though i'm such a bottom. Personally, i think it has something to do with having been married most of my life and in a position where i always had to top? idk, but it isn't a choice for me, i'll fuck if the planets are aligned, but it rarely happens, so i don't even venture into versatile land.

Raunch to me is often code for "scat." But i have found it also includes a lot of what you list, "unwashed, sweaty, pheromones." i'd add spit to the list i do not see the word "dirty" used as much, but i have found it often is code for "scat" as well. Pig, i agree with your take on that one.

my experience, more and more, is that many of the words we use can get us in the ballpark (as to their meaning), but i find i have to as for clarification if i want to be sure. i'm on a couple of BDSM discussion forums that are open to everyone, but the primary population is straight. i've learned a ton about how the straight and gay communities differ in their use of words. So much of this stuff has individual nuance, but here's a few more. Top/Total Top- penetrator both oral and anal, does not get penetrated either way, has no interest in cock Top versatile- primarily a penetrator, but will take cock anally on occasion, and (often seems to me) will suck, but will not take it up the ass versatile- can go either way, Top or bottom, but in my experience, most guys using the identifier "versatile" would fit more in "versatile bottom" bottom versatile-primarily takes cock, but will fuck on occasion and likes getting their cock sucked, touched bottom/total bottom- only wants to be penetrated, usually anally, but also orally. doesn't want their cock touched Dom- wants to be in control (usually sexually), call the shots... this definition can go on for weeks and is (i think) mostly individually defined Sub- wants to be controlled (usually sexually), have a Dom call the shots... this definition can go on for weeks and is(i think) mostly individually defined isnta Dom- wants to be in control with little or no input or communication with a 'sub' insta sub- will submit to control with little or no input or communication with a 'dom'

For me, there are two kinds of sore throat i can get from cock sucking. One is the muscle ache of taking a cock in my throat, that's just normal it seems. To me, my throat is just my front pussy and just needs to open and relax to take a Mans cock. Of course, size is going to affect that, as well as how aggressive the Top is. i'm not much into getting aggressively face fucked. Sucking cock is the one bottom activity where it makes sense to me to be in control. Getting fucked? i never wanna be in control, sucking cock is something i can do for my Top when He is not needing to fuck. The other is skin irritation, like an infection sore throat that feels surface. It takes a little time for an infection to take hold and to feel it's effects. i have found that if the sharp soreness happens quickly, sometimes right after sucking, it is because the Top has been using something like hand lotion as a lube on His cock. When you read the label on most hand lotion containers, they invariably read: "not for internal use." Not good for fucking, definitely not good for sucking. It can really irritate the throat.

Asspig is a hook up site for guys who like fisting. Many members have videos of them fisting, so if you like amateur vids, it's a good resource.

Here's one journal article dosing recommendation: "Daily, continuing, oral dose of coformulated tenofovir and emtricitabine ≤90-day supply Patients need to take a daily dose of PrEP for 7 days before high levels of protection are achieved for both vaginal and rectal exposure to HIV" [think before following links] https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5518248/

i've been on asspig for years. i've hooked with several guys from there as well. i have never even tried the forum part of the site, so can imagine what find91 says is true about it being 'dead.' To me, it is more of a specific genre hook up site than it is a discussion forum. The only discussions i have had there are through their message function.

Thanks for the comments guys. This disease is only about a year old in study terms, though it has received a lot of attention this last year. i had one patient this weekend who is Covid poz and part of a double blind test the hospital where i work is conducting... the med is Leronlimab. We also use a lot of remdesivir. So far from what i am seeing (purely anecdotal, subjective observation on the front line here), the meds that blunt cytokine response syndrome seem to be having effect. Time and a lot more research will eventually tell.

i am beginning to wonder if those of us who are healthy and on HIV meds or PreP may actually be at less risk from Covid 19? i'm a critical care nurse and have been working on a Covid unit, volunteering to take Covid + patients, since the first week of March. i do not know (because testing was not available) but think i may have had Covid at the end of February. i have also wondered if i have not fought it off several times since? No way of knowing, it's all speculation on my part, but i have cared for Covid patients every other week since March, so i have been around Covid a lot. i did get an antibody test a month ago and i have no antibodies. That does not necessarily mean i have not had Covid, it could just mean we do not maintain antibodies for long... we don't know. Meanwhile, some anti retroviral drugs used to treat HIV or for PreP are being studied and used to treat Covid, so i speculate that the meds i take may be helping protect me? Wouldn't that be a cool and funny turn of events if gays have a better chance of beating Covid because of this? Here's an article discussing some of the research on the topic: [think before following links] https://www.poz.com/article/people-hiv-getting-covid19

yesterday. a regular fb texted me saying how he needed my mouth. He'd already texted me a couple of times the last couple of days, needing, but his work schedule was in the way. i replied: "how about now?" and he texted back that he had hurt his wrist and had just taken a pain pill. He was afraid he would not be able to stay hard. i asked him if the pill would keep him from enjoying getting sucked or having an orgasm, he said "no." So i told him i didn't care if he got hard, as long as he could enjoy and have an orgasm. He was at my house 15 minutes later, sitting on the sofa, legs spread watching porn. i came in from another room, knelt between his beautiful thighs and sucked him. He got hard and stayed hard the whole time and came hard and down my throat about 15 minutes later. After leaving, he texted me that it felt like i had sucked his soul out of him. Fuck yeah, i'll take that inside of me too. i love guys.

Here's a little anatomy/physiology explanation of what is in semen and how it's made. [think before following links] https://medlineplus.gov/ency/anatomyvideos/000121.htm

Surprised no one has mentioned this... but when a guy looks at you and touches his balls or makes sounds, he is telling you he wants you. What you are experiencing is old school cruising. Before cell phones and aps, we had gaydar lol. It wasn't always reliable, but hey, neither are aps. If a guy touches his cock or balls, it usually signals that that is where he wants attention. Making sucking sounds is a signal for oral, could go either way (top or bottom). As others have noted, wearing a jock sends a good signal that you are bottom (to those who know, some guys may be new or not catch on to the meaning), a chastity cage is a signal that is hard to miss lol. A return communication if a guy looks at you and touches His cock, is to return the gaze and touch your ass or finger your hole. That's a pretty clear communication when cruising, and anyone watching will get the message as well. It may help you to remember, the fear of rejection is a double edged sword, it cuts both ways. I.e., guys who may really want you fear rejection too, so you have to be approachable. Shy, fearful guys often send off a vibe of being closed, or even aloof, even though that is not how they feel at all. Guys may feel just as intimidated by you as you feel about them.

Yes, me and Ikea, making a better world one cocksucker at a time.

lol, can also get to it from the outside if you push a finger at the base of the cock, underside (top of the taint). You feel the urethra first, but right behind the urrethra at that point is the prostate. There's sort of art form to learning it, not to hard, not too soft, watch they guys expression lol, it will speak volumes. See in the pic how even if you go in through the ass, you are not actually touching the prostate? Pressure can be exerted on the prostate from all sorts of directions ;-).

Yesterday. An older straight guy contacted me on squirt. It was soon apparent he had little experience, just a fantasy he wanted, he called it "erotic massage". He wanted me to restrain him and edge him. As a total bottom, not usually my thing, but i asked if "edging" included sucking. He replied "yes, but no anal." Eh, it's a Covid world and i'm not going to turn down a cock. He was a really nice guy, obviously little to no experience. Helped him discover his prostate by massaging it above his pubic symphysis and deep into his taint, just under his shaft, while i sucked him. i have 4 point restraints on my bed (for me lol), and he was writhing in them as i pleasured him. i have a really intense impact/vibrating massager that i used with him, definitely edged him. When he finally came (i'm not dom, so i didn't push the edging thing, just prolonged the pleasure), he was shaking. He had a great cock and balls and i really enjoyed spending time with them and him. Swallowed a sweet load.

I've read all the posts and i'm going to bite my tongue while writing this, this is what i am reading: Your 'top daddy breeder" is HIV poz, fucks other boys besides you raw, and doesn't want you to have sex with anyone except who he chooses and watches, and he doesn't want you to take PreP. In the event that he did want to watch you get fucked by another guy, would it be raw? i get there are some D/s dynamics where both parties get off on the Dom having this kind of control... but i am not getting that sense from you? The fact that you are tempted by the guy from the gym makes me think the relationship should be open both ways? i don't know this, but my read of all your responses leads me to think that this guy is a user? Unless there is stuff that changes this story dramatically, details we do not know? i'd ask yourself: are you happy with a relationship where he is protected and you are not, where the relationship is open for him, but not for you? i think if the answer to either of these questions is "no," i think you need to renegotiate the terms of your relationship, or find someone who is compatible with your needs and desires. People who get used in relationships (where the __________ is not mutual), eventually get used up, it's not sustainable.