tallslenderguy

i think this is a good point. It seems there is no one 'right' technique, so the best cock suckers are not focused on their methods, but how the man they are sucking is responding. Not always easy, because not every guy gives feedback, so you have to rely on things like breathing and cock response. One of my favorite things to do is to start out concentraiting on the head getting the Top really turned on and sexually tense, then when He is almost feeling a sense of frustration by the tension without release, the overload, i'll suddenly go deep and take Him to the hilt so His head gets the friction sensation of my throat. Then ill alternate tension with pleasure depending on how He is reacting.

Cool question. First off, i haven't run into a lot of guys with foreskins, let alone "long" or overhanging. Am guessing there's more guys with foreskins in other countries, given the US practice of circumcision at birth. i've easily had in excess of a 1000 cocks, but prolly fewer than 5% have been uncut. i find it neither "disgusting" or "hot," maybe because for me i'm sucking off the guy via his cock, i.e., i am guy-centric, not cock-centric. i love men. Which is not to say i don't notice the awesome beauty of a part of His anatomy, i do, but it's not where my focus is when i am sucking. When i am sucking or being penetrated, i go for a soul connection as well as body. Having said that, the first thing i think (it's a brief and fleeting thought, but it's there) is cleanliness. i know some guys are into smells or funk, i'm not one of them. i've never turned down a cock, but i have to get past it if a cock is unclean. Guys with a foreskin have an extra place, and that's actually part of the argument used for circumcision (i.e., that it's easier to keep clean). i don't think that's a good reason for circumcision personally, soap and water are pretty accessible. i am scrupulously clean and i also appreciate guys who are. As to what i do? i run my tongue under it and around the tip of a guys cock. If it's long, i'll nibble and pull and tease. i also grab hold of His shaft at points while sucking and pull down on it to retract the foreskin for access to the tip of His cock. The guys i have been with who have them have usually gotten hard pretty quickly, so i haven't had much experience with over hang, but i could see myself trying to inflate it a bit, with either my breath or spit. i'd appreciate some education from guys with foreskins. What feels good to You and what do You like?

i know this isn't exactly what you were asking, but i love it when a Top just puts poppers under my nose with the expectation that i will inhale. i have never been stoned or drunk in my life, so poppers is one of the few things i have done. i'm not into rough sex, but love a connection that is affectionately presumptuous, where the Top just sort of assumes that i'll like it and is brave enough to give it a try without being bullying. If a Top tries something with me and i perceive desire on His part, i open right up and love Him, if i feel forced, i close up... which i know a lot of guys don't see as very sub. i've had Tops just slide a bottle under my nose and say things like: "here baby, take a hit" and i immediately fold into Him and inhale. it really enhances a feeling of oneness with Him for me.

i can relate to most of the responses here when it comes to how i feel when in heat and after. Cognitively, it seems a combination of physical and psychological/emotional for me. To me it's sort of like hunger, if i haven't eaten in awhile, my body starts signaling me trying to get me to eat, the hungrier i get the less discriminating. The difference is i like the feeling of being in heat (as long as there's hope of connecting), but don't love the feeling of being hungry (or maybe i do, as long as there's hope of a good meal?). When i was religious in a way that considered my sexuality as 'bad,' i hated myself in heat and fought it like a mad man, without any success. For me i felt like an addict going through withdrawal, connecting with a man sexually was my "fix," without Him i was crazed till i had Him.

my brother was 13 years older than me, he was a faggot before it was a popular sub culture. i was with him as he died of AID's in '84. he was 6'2" and weighed 89 pounds. He had beginning dementia, Kaposis sarcoma, pneumonia, and intestinal parasitic infections that gave him continuous diarrhea. At first, he refused to go to the hospital, to get treatment, then the last few months of his life he wanted to live. AZT was a new and experimental drug, it was all probably too late for him. his dying and death were not fun or exciting for him or anyone else, and he was a very kinky guy. i'm a critical care nurse, i take care of critically ill patients all the time. i have yet to meet a person who enjoys the realities of being sick and debilitated. Feeling rotten is just that, feeling rotten... and that comes with all the opportunistic illnesses that accompany untreated HIV. One can fantasize and romanticize about being POZ all they want, how many of you who are advocating in that way are in full blown AID's? i'm not talking HIV poz, but the eventual result of AIDs, two very different conditions. Are medications perfect and free of side effects? No. If one is worried about the effects that meds can have on their body, why aren't they worried about the effects that come with HIV (they're worse). PreP and HIV suppression are about containment and prevention. Think about it. If every gay guy who was HIV poz was on meds and suppressed, we wouldn't need PreP. Eventually, the infection rate would reverse and it would be harder to get. i suspect that there are very, very few who actually want to die a tortuous death from AID's or who want to inflict that on another. i'm sure they exist, just like Ted Bundy or Jeffrey Dahmer, but i doubt there are many like that. Otherwise, i think the desire to be poz is ultimately an expression of self loathing, that it's homophobic. We're talking sickness and death here. There is no more final expression of self loathing than to kill your self. please don't do it.

Long term effects of HIV have been proven.

i've read similar stuff about the Brittish Navy during the 1800's. Either way, the peg chair was pretty innovative. i guess someone back then took a pole (so to speak) and determined that Tops liked they holes open vs tight.

surprised no one mentioned squirt, they have a bunch of cam chat rooms

i read it. It supports the contention that several are making about the blindness that often comes with privilege. If you look at the "compass," one of the points is "attack others," and more specifically: "turning the tables" and "blaming the victim." The OP is from a black person who identified and explained a racist term and further explained how it makes him feel and why it is offensive. Some responded by "turning the tables" and "blaming the victim," out of "shame."

i know, right? Sarah Palin and S a t a n are synonymous to some

Wow, thank you for sharing, i never would have guessed this. From the things you have written about yourself, i had thought of you as having a history of being a gay sex slave, i never would have imagined you being married with kids. As you say: "it's complicated." Life can have so many variations.

Out to close friends/family here. i don't have any stereotypical traits that incline people to label me as gay, so the only way people know is if i come out to them. The first time i came out was when i was 19 and still very religious and unaccepting of myself. At that point i thought gay was sick and sinful, so i "confessed" my attraction to guys in front of my church. i thought the reason i could not "overcome" my desires or "get free" was because i was too proud to admit my 'problem.' One of the people who was there when i "confessed" was my future wife to be. It was still the 70's and coming out was still a big deal in those days. No one at my church, including myself, really knew what it meant to be gay, so that coming out was an admission , not a declaration. There have been various times over the years where i told people, but for the most part, i lived on the DL till 2006. At that point, i came out to my kids and anyone who was around me. Kids and former wife are still religious and disowned me, excommunicated, etc.. These days i just tell people when the topic comes up or to women who seem interested in me and wonder why i don't hit on them lol.

Being "in heat" is how i have long described my state of desire, makes total sense to me as a bottom that other bottoms would relate as well. As a little kid growing up in LA, before i was sexually active, i remember seeing a large number of male dogs around a house (maybe 15 to 20). i was informed that there was a bitch in heat inside the house. The owner came outside in an attempt to chase them away and in the process, the bitch go lose and came outside. What transpired was the first group fuck i ever witnessed. Two dogs would get knotted, but that didn't keep the others from waiting their turn. Even at that age, before i really fully knew i was a gay bottom, i remember being envious of the bitch.

i was likely depressed most of my life when religious and married (to a woman). i could not resist hook up sex and cheating. i realized later that getting fucked was my only form of sexual affirmation. Once i processed through all my cultural bias and accepted who i am, the obsessive, uncontrollable need to get fucked just simply stopped. Getting fucked is an awesome form of self expression for me now, but i don't need it to medicate anymore, i haven't known depression since i accepted myself. But when i was trapped in my prison of wrong belief, it was absolutely medication for depression.

i get that. Hormones are powerful stuff. The drive for sex, connecting in that way, goes beyond reason. Once the tension/drive is relieved, our reason can kick back in and give us a wtf moment. i've noticed that reason rarely wins against hormones lol.

my thoughts went the same direction as Eros, i.e., you didn't really want him to have his way with you, you wanted him to dominate you, no questions asked. What he wanted was to ask you what you want because he wants to please you. For me, that's pretty damned close to awesome, as long as the guy is a total top. i hate it when that happens and the guy is really versatile and hoping/fishing for a flip. For me, a big part of sex is mental, i like the Total Top/ total bottom dynamic. you sound like your into D/s, but like you lean more towards Top/bottom dynamic? For instance, would you have liked it if He had demanded in a dominant way that you fuck him? That would have been him using you for his pleasure, but i suspect that's not what you'd want?

lol... i've wondered something similar on hook up sites with flakes. I.e., those flakes are really guys from the religious right trying to frustrate and disappoint gay guys. But then, i 'm pretty sure that's mostly paranoia on my part lmao. Having come from a background where i was subjected to "reparative therapy," i wouldn't put anything past the religious right, but i think few of them would think of doing it. Not nobility, just ignorance on their part.

i love a Top who enjoys eating my pussy, but not for the purpose of removing loads. For me, cum is for breeding. Even when i take a cock in my mouth, when a Top starts to cum, i take His cock into my throat and take His cum deep. Heck, i never like to lose cum once it's inside of me, i try to hold and absorb it. For me, the idea that there is a part of the Top that becomes part of me is a HUGE deal, so i have no desire to remove Him once He is inside of me, even if it's a transfer from one end to the other, it's missing the orgasm that put it there in the first place.

enjoy, but not for me. i get horribly disappointed by any cum that doesn't make it inside. Whether it's my bottom or another, i hate porn where the top cums on instead of in the bottom.

Acting violates something in me and i'd rather go without than pretend. A large part of my pursuit of sex with another guy is looking for chemistry where we compliment each others needs/desires. i am looking for a real connection, for both of us, so i often try to communicate with a guy online to determine compatability before hooking. Other times, if a guy just contacts me as says he wants to fuck me, i won't dig too deep. To me acting feels like lying and that i am being disrespectful. i'm not making a moral judgement, i know these are just my personal feelings. i know there are guys on both sides who want their partner to 'act' a certain way, that there guys into role play as well (a form of acting?). It just triggers something in me, comes to close to manipulation, a subtle form of control to me, i don't like it.

First of all, i love you. Secondly, what the fuck qualifies a cumdump as "true?" lol i appreciate the sweet and vulnerable subness in you that would pose such a question, but i personally don't think we are defined by others. i know a lot of guys, especially in a "D/s" context feel otherwise, so i qualify "personally." i believe we reflect each other in relationship, not dictate or manipulate who the other one is. i guess i should also qualify that i think manipulation is unscrupulous but really love the "molding" aspect of a D/s relationship. It's complicated lol. Bottoms, cumdumps, have likely existed since the beginning of time. I.e., way before HIV came along and also before any oportunistic pathogen of any sort took a ride on someones cock or in their semen, etc., to become the first "STD." my point is, cum and disease are two different things. Chasers might more accurately be termed HIVdumps if they are more preoccupied with HIV than cum? Again, i do not mean or say that with a disparaging attitude. i don't agree with the notion of chasing, but a part of me gets it (i think). For me, it's not just cum i need or want when i have sex with a guy. It runs a whole lot deeper than that for me, and i don't pretend to understand my feelings completely. i love the sigh a man puts in me when he orgasms, the desire/lust, the pleasure. i love having a physical part of Him left inside of me, and the intent of Him leaving it inside of me. i'll take more than His cum (physically), like His piss for instance. Again, the idea of having something His body has made and held put into mine is a big part of the connection for me, so in that respect, i sort of get those who chase. For lack of a better analogy, taking PreP is sort of like taking birth control? i.e., i want everything that pertains to intercourse with a guy except the possibility of a 'baby' (i.e., disease). (i know, a baby is not a disease). i may regret that analogy because i know a lot of guys associate being pozzed with being "knocked up." sigh

^^THIS^^ Fast food may fill the void, but a gourmet meal is so much better. When there is a "connection" it takes things to a whole different level for me. For lack of a better way to explain it, it isn't so much age as maturity. Maturity is not always age related, though we associate the two instinctively it seems. i've noticed, especially with a lot of guys into D/s, there's some on both sides (i.e., D or s) who want an empty headed play thing or vice versa. To me the appeal of Top/bottom, D/s, is the psycological, the mental/emotional part of sex where the Top or D reaches into the bottom or sub and fucks and breeds that part of him. For me, that has an added dimension if it happens with a younger guy because it is not 'expected' that a younger guy is going to have that kind of experiential knowledge and ability. i was at a gay sex resort last year and a couple of young guys (they were together) were in a play room. The room was busy and i was by no means a standout fuck, there were plenty of good looking and younger guys there. One of these guys was watching another guy get fucked and was stroking his cock, so i went to suck him and he let me. It wasn't long before He wanted to fuck me and he turned me around and slid in. He got into being aggressive and was getting off on the public part of it. At one point, He pulled out and told me to suck Him and He got a thrill out of the fact that i did it after He'd been fucking me. He commented to the onlookers about how i would take it in the ass and suck my own juices off of Him in a mocking way. After a bit, he pulled out and went outdoors and was talking to a group of guys and his friend, telling them about me in mocking terms, telling them i wasn't much to look at and laughing. Then he and his friend came back in. i recognized his friend as a guy who had bred me earlier in a booth. They asked me to go to their room with them and i declined. Partly, i felt a red flag, like things could get abusive. But honestly, i was hurt by the things the one guy had said to his friends and the physical part (they were both hot) was not enough to capture me as a fuck. They lost me. The guy who had been mocking me was the one who made the invite. He was obviously disappointed and surprised by my refusal, and tried to change my mind. i don't know if he connected the reason why in his mind? Sex can be very complex, i know some guys reading this are going to be shocked and say i wasn't a "good" sub or bottom. i know some guys want that sort of thing and honestly, there is a sort of humiliation that can totally captivate me, but it always has affection/desire attached to it from the Top. I.e., if the Top is obviously loving me for being so sub even in a humiliating situation, i am His. If He can take me or leave me, the connection is not there and he has lost me. whoa, sorry, that went down a rabbit trail lol

First off, i think you are fucking gorgeous. Your combination of personality and looks is a total meltdown for me lol. For some reason, the darker a guys skin, the more i psycologically associate them with Top or Dom. No logic to it that i can discern, but Latino, black, tanned guys all impact me as more top while pale, hairless strikes me as bottom. It's totally a visual for me. Once personality enters in, any 'look' can be Top or bottom, personality trumps looks for me. Hairy is definitely a visual top for me, though i prefer less hairy guys generally speaking.

Great thread, i wonder if the survey results would be different if it were started today? Even in 9 years, it gets easier and easier to be openly gay, but not sure that would make a difference in those identifying as bi. i was married to a woman for 31 years, was a virgin when i married her when i was barely 21. i married a woman because of religious and cultural conditioning/beliefs. The way i came to see it was my conditioning and beliefs were like a prison and my wife was my prison romance (comparing to straight guys who go to prison and have a romantic tryst because that's all that is available). It's been a curiosity to me. We had plenty of sex and i never had any trouble getting it up for her or going down on her. i started cheating on her with guys 5 years into the marriage (i didn't like cheating, it was hurtful and torturous and not something i am proud of). She's the only woman i have ever been with vs prolly a thousand guys? When i divorced in 08, i thought i might be bi so i tried dating and considered poly. Was a great experience for me, met and dated some really great people. One woman had her PhD in women's studies and was a visiting professor from Germany (taught in the US). She had been lesbian most of her life and was a leader in the lesbian community in Germany. She woke up one day and decided she wanted to be with men. She told me that she'd probably be killed in Germany if the lesbian community found out, so she was practicing an interesting form of 'DL' lol. She wanted to have sex with me, but i just wasn't feeling it, even though i found her attractive. That helped me figure out i really am gay and not bi. i also dated a trans person (FtoM). That relationship was awesome, i learned so much about deeply imbedded notions of gender and masculinity/feminenity. When it came to sex (he was a top and used his hand to penetrate), again, it just didn't happen for me. Even though he identified as male, there was to much about him that felt female and i didn't feel sexual towards him. On the other hand, a top Tgirl can be a turn on for me, though i have never been with one. On the very rare occasion that i have topped, it has always been with smooth boy types. i more recently had a Victor/Victoria moment when a doctor i had a crush on at work was gone for awhile and came back to work changed from Stuart to Julie. To this day though, the only woman i have ever had sex with was my former wife.

ii love this... not so much the "papi" part. To me, it's better if the age difference remains unspoken, because it is so obvious? i think it's probably the all the stereotypes that this breaks that penetrates me so deeply? To me, a Tgirl who only wants to breed me or have me service her cock is mind blowingly HOT. There is something in most of us (i think?) that associates "Tgirl" or "fem" with "bottom" or "sub," so for a fem guy or Tgirl to only want me to service their cock or breed me is a HUGE affirmation of me being a bottom/sub. And i love the 'humility' of them demonstrating that i am a pussies pussy? What makes this even hotter is that to anyone observing, on the surface it would look like the opposite is going on. i'm not fem, people cannot tell i am gay, let alone a bottom who loves a Top who needs/wants to impregnate me. Onlookers would all think: "oh, he's the top/dom in that relationship," when the opposite is true.