Who else here is into monogamy?

[hntnhole]

4 hours ago, Leatherman667 said:

I am sorry to say but I could not be monogamous! I have to be with anonymous people and have anonymous sex as much as possible! I have never been able to have a monogamous relationship!

Well, I'm sorry you feel sorry for needing a lot of anonymous sex with as many men as possible.  I believe that the urge, need, requirement for a lot of sex with whoever you run into in the darkrooms/fuckjoints is a perfectly natural requirement for some of us, regardless of cultural strictures.  We're just born differently.  Monogamy is as much a state of mind as an actual practice.  Maybe you'll be lucky, and become close to a mirror image of your own Lusts.  It could be the best of both worlds !! 

[NWUSHorny]

4 hours ago, Leatherman667 said:

I am sorry to say but I could not be monogamous! I have to be with anonymous people and have anonymous sex as much as possible! I have never been able to have a monogamous relationship!

Why be sorry, I tried monogamy briefly twice in my 20's, I'm still quite happy with my decision that it wasn't for me in my 50's.

[bareback-flipflop]

This the question that is like addressed just directly to me. I am always wondering if I  find  the right one whether I will be ready for monogamy if he expects it. I don’t know. Two years ago I fall in love and in the beginning I felt a kind of grief for loosing my promiscuous life. After some dates I could think only on him and I absolutely didn’t want to have sex with others. When he said it didn’t work with us, two days later I went to an orgy. 
I can imagine that I find a guy with I don’t miss promiscuity but I can’t imagine that it will last forever. 
Honestly, I would be happy with a guy with we love each other deeply but we can have adventures with others.

I read here a post years ago. The poster lived with his boyfriend in love. He had a tiring week out of the town they lived and he needed some relaxing. When he arrived at home there were 5 men and they bred his ass one after the other. When they finished, they left and his boyfriend grabbed him into his arms and brought him upstairs to their bedroom for a real emotional love making. The poster felt that he was the luckiest guy ever because his boyfriend knew what he needed. And it was the real love. 
So, I really envious of them and I always think that I want a relationship like that. 

However, I doubt if I ever meet a guy like this, who has the characteristics that I need besides this, like e.g., intelligence, sexual habits, proper age, graduate. I know it seems silly but I know I won’t be happy a guy with whom we aren’t the same level, we don’t have mutual interest, etc. 

 

[Guest]

I had a monogamous relationship once, it was nice in the beginning but after awhile it turned kinda ugly. I prefer polyamorous relationships. 

[Pozguyinchi]

I don’t feel men are wired to be monogamous. I have had a couple of long term relationships but each of the men were bull dominant men and made it clear early on that my pussy would not be enough. 

[Guest]

I am into monogamous relationships only because I am into cuckold, so with a open relationship wouldn't hurt as much!

[hntnhole]

4 hours ago, Pozguyinchi said:

I don’t feel men are wired to be monogamous

I agree.  Most men aren't, and we raw pigs have even fewer than "most" in our ranks that the rest of the unhappy world.  

I still believe, however, that actual monogamy (no outside sex ever) can be modified into what I'll call Polyamorous Monogamy, which may be an oxymoron to a dictionary, but relevant to us.  I mean, within the confines of a loving, caring, giving relationship, there can be a wide-open, shared thirst for pigsex with as many other men as needed.  We can truly Love only one man, and share outside (the relationship) pigsex together, which only deepens and enriches the Loving quotient between the two lovers.

 That construct can also be enlarged to each guy having separate outside sex with complete acceptance by the other.  If the relationship is sound, each lover will know that's it's the freedom to fuck whenever we want, without bothering the foundational Love that the relationship expresses.  Freedom to fuck anytime, anywhere and a Loving relationship are not mutually exclusive.

Unless someone has experienced a relationship like this, they probably are not equipped to criticize one either.  I know, because I had a relationship like this for just over 30 years.  

[BootmanLA]

5 hours ago, hntnhole said:

I agree.  Most men aren't, and we raw pigs have even fewer than "most" in our ranks that the rest of the unhappy world.  

I still believe, however, that actual monogamy (no outside sex ever) can be modified into what I'll call Polyamorous Monogamy, which may be an oxymoron to a dictionary, but relevant to us.  I mean, within the confines of a loving, caring, giving relationship, there can be a wide-open, shared thirst for pigsex with as many other men as needed.  We can truly Love only one man, and share outside (the relationship) pigsex together, which only deepens and enriches the Loving quotient between the two lovers.

 That construct can also be enlarged to each guy having separate outside sex with complete acceptance by the other.  If the relationship is sound, each lover will know that's it's the freedom to fuck whenever we want, without bothering the foundational Love that the relationship expresses.  Freedom to fuck anytime, anywhere and a Loving relationship are not mutually exclusive.

Unless someone has experienced a relationship like this, they probably are not equipped to criticize one either.  I know, because I had a relationship like this for just over 30 years.  

I agree with the concept you're promoting, 100% - but once again, I think the terminology is a bit off. Polyamorous is already pretty well understood (or at least, becoming understood) as a loving relationship involving more than two people, not two people in a relationship who have outside partners where there's no "love" involved.

At least as I understand the terms, these are what the terms mean:

-Celibate - not having sexual interactions with anyone. Comes in voluntary (choosing to abstain from sex) and involuntary (can't get laid) variants.

-Not committed - Sexually active at times, even often, but not with anyone considered a partner. Can range from one-night-stands to friends with benefits to fuckbuddies.

-Monogamous - Sexually active in a relationship with one partner. Usually includes a love component, but one can be technically monogamous even if the love isn't present or has disappeared.

-Polyamorous - Sexually active with a relationship with more than one regular partner. This comes in many varieties. There are poly relationships where all partners are equals and interact sexually and socially together. There are ones where there's a primary couple, and they may together or separately have other partners. There are further variants where, say, a man can have a husband (primary partner), a boyfriend (someone with whom he goes on dates but who isn't his primary), a daddy (someone who provides a mature or dominant influence outside of his primary partner), a slave, a pup, or any number of other types of interaction. But all of these are characterized by recognized relationship roles - even if they're not the standard "spouse+spouse" type of role.

-Open relationship - Has a primary partner, but either or both of them can have sex with other people outside of the relationship, either separately or together. Unlike role names, this type of relationship is more characterized by rules agreed upon by both partners, even if it's "anything goes". Aside from "anything goes", the rules are more often restrictive (no sex with our mutual friends, no sex in our bedroom, etc.) but can sometimes be inclusive (only play with a third together, only play with guys we've approved). 

I think that covers all the kinds of relationships I can think of, in terms as broad and non-gender-specific as I can come up with. I'm open, of course, to adding other categories, but I think most things will end up fitting into one of these choices.

 

[Gaymer25M]

I learned from my past relationship that monogamy isn’t for me. My ex and I eventually opened our relationship but I did cheat when we were closed. In the end I realized I couldn’t give what my ex wanted and that’s no bueno. We split but didn’t end on bad terms at all. We actually still keep in contact and for some reason, somehow, NOW he’s sleeping around a lot and releasing his inner hoe lol. 
 

We even send each other pics/vids of us having sex with fuck buds or random guys. And of course I still jerk off to all the vids I took of him getting bred by random guys while we were together and open.

But yeah I can’t do monogamy. I need/want sex with multiple guys whether it’s completely anonymous or with a regular fuck bud. NSA obviously. 
 

If I ever get involved with a guy again, I’ll lay in down immediately about being open haha. 💁🏽‍♂️

[Phallarchist]

I'm only into monogamy for the risk reduction. If diseases weren't a factor, I'd try to breed a new boy every day.

[Guest]

I feel like I’m at the point where I would be ready for this with the right guy. The one I loved doing everything with. The one who I loved  to suck and bottom and top and who loved the same with me  I have a couple  guys I’ve been seeing who fit that criteria and we’ve expressed our mutual desire to actually settle down with each other. But I feel unfortunately it will never happen. Boys will be boys and when the opportunity arises for some fun we will take it. 
I had a guy a long time ago I felt was the one and was ready to settle down with and I told him  he was the one and the best I ever had and he told me straight up that the best dick he ever had was the one he had at the moment. It’s rare to find a guy who won’t just always be looking for his next hookup. Hopefully you found it. But I’m done hunting for unicorns 

[BredByJ]

I didn't plan on being monogamous with my most recent guy. He brought it up after a couple of months and told me he was only fucking me and he liked the idea of knowing he "could safely slide into me". I told him I hadn't let anyone else fuck me since he started. Soon after, he started talking about "taking me at some point". And I wanted it, even though I never topped before.

[Guest]

On 10/7/2022 at 5:09 PM, VersGuyAnon said:

It's a very interesting question. 

Whenever I was in a relationship I was 100% monogamous. I think my problem was I became "too devoted" and showed too much love. I haven't been in a relationship for years. During my penultimate relationship I became pretty sure he started fucking around elsewhere, in spite of denying me sex and affection. 

Now I wouldn't trust anyone to be worthy of commitment, although so many would be. I think things have moved on so much I'd rather be selfish, do what I want when I want and be a slut whenever possible.      

There is nothing wrong with being devoted. You can be open relationship and devoted. I am devoted to my partner yet we are fully open. Yes we have a very open sex life and we are very honest with each other but that doesn’t limit my love or devotion. My partner is about 15 yrs older than I and a bottom (so am I) yet is a dom in the relationship. My devotion comes in form of love, I cook for him, I clean the house. That man doesn’t have to lift a finger other than fixing things and mowing the lawn. My dedication & devotion comes in that way as that’s how I show my love. Despite fact we have outside sex together and separate, I have never ever felt need to seek love elsewhere, just sex. When I hook up I think about him and after I am done I am just happy to head home to him. Don’t let the idea of sexually involving yourself with others lessen your loge or devotion. Also, you know it’s all worth it when your partner shows you appreciation. Often we see such devoted ppl have their dedication taken advantage of. Believe me, I’ve been there with an ex who did nothing but used me. 

[tallslenderguy]

i don't think any relationship should be based on a static rule. Life is fluid. 

Which is not to say i don't believe in guiding principles or that i have anything against monogamy. i think if it happens, it should happen because both parties are continually wanting it, not because a rule was made that both now have to obey and force the relationship into.

 Open, honest communication, to me, is a better foundation for relationship than a rule like monogamy. Lying and cheating often happens because of broken rules, rules that one found at some point they didn't want to, or couldn't  keep, for myriad reasons. 

There's a part of me that likes the idea of monogamy, but when i look at it more closely, it's not so much monogamy that appeals to me, but factors associatied with monogamy. E.g., long term connection with one person with the incumbent opportunities for deeper relationship. But that is something that can be had with a FB.  

 

[blackrobe]

Monogamy, like any plan of battle, rarely survives contact with the enemy.

Live long enough and there are always situations where hewing to monogamy stops making sense. Better not to think of it as an ideal or absolute at all.