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Strangest Requests When Hooking Up


BritishCumdump

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What are the weirdest requests you've had from a guy before they'll hook up with you? 

Okay so I'm an anon cumdump and my modus operandi is door unlocked, me on all fours on the bed, hooded/blindfolded, taking all cummers. As I'm sure many of you know, this "no nonsense" approach to hookups is actually insanely complicated so, after a 6 hour session last night where I only managed to get 8 loads in me because of a lot of guys with very specific needs or just plain timewasters, I thought I'd have a bit of a rant about the complications usually encountered and some of the bizarre special requests/mandatory requirements guys have given me before they'll come over. I'm literally just wanting them to come in, fuck me, leave, and yet it requires half an hour of chatting and answering questions before they'll come, or they'll just block me after an obvious wank. Here are mine so far in rough order of insanity. 

- Would only fuck me if I was wearing football socks. 

- Wanted to kiss me but only if I hadn't brushed my teeth. 

- Only if I was wearing a cumstained jock. 

- That I leave out some dirty underwear for him to sniff. 

- Only if I was totally silent throughout. 

- That I called him daddy when he was actually 15 years younger than me. 

- That I wear his rubber biohazard jock as he fucked me even though I was on prep and so was he. 

- Only if I had specifically 3 loads in me already.

- That there was a dining room chair in the room. I'm not sure why as from what I heard it was never used or touched. 

- That there was a used condom on the side for him to drink or pour into me when he arrived (they didn't understand how tough it is for a guy that let's anyone breed them raw to find a condom nevermind a used one). 

- That I had my biggest toy in me already when he came in (he was a bit shocked when he saw the size and probably felt a bit small). 

- That he could walk in on another guy fucking me and pretend he was my bf. 

- That he could hide in another room and listen as a different guy fucked me. 

- The opposite where he needed to know someone was listening as he fucked me (sadly I could never coordinate the above three guys) 

- That I have at least one untreated STI. 

- That I had -specifically- a Pakistani guy's load in me. For this I tried to facilitate it but ended up just lying and saying the guy before him was Pakistani (when you're blindfolded and don't ask for pics it's kinda tough to do this kinda thing). 

 

So yeah there's probably more but those are the ones off the top of my head. How about yours? Or alternatively what's the weirdest request you've made of a guy? 

Also there is nothing more annoying than you telling someone on an app that you're putting the blindfold on and to just come in. Only to wait 5 minutes, no sign of him, check your phone and find "Are you sure?" "Hey you there?" "Can I come in?" messages from him. Gah. 

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You should do a TED talk.

I can’t claim your sheer variety of experiences, but I definitely get them too. The request for specific numbers of loads is quite common for me, as are requests to walk in when someone else is fucking me. Related to this, I get ones requesting to stick around after they seed me and watch me get fucked by others.

The ‘can I come in’ - drives me mad, especially when he’s just stipulated that he wants the first thing he sees when he walks in to be my ass in the air. And then he knocks, and will not come in until I get up and open the door for him. 🤨

On the subject of dildoes, there was one who wanted me to have one ready for him to use on me - specifically the kind that will actually squirt fake semen. Because we all have one of those, and a supply of fake cum, with us when we travel.

There was one guy who wanted me to meet him for an outdoor fuck in the woods, and when I arrived, he let me know he wanted me to hold his hand and call him ‘Babe’. Awkward.

Also, not so much a request but a sort of expected condition, since he had me three different times, was a Native American guy in whom some switch would flip when he got balls deep in me and would start savagely fucking me, spitting on my back, and saying hateful-sounding things in Lakota.

When I’m hosting, though, I’m pretty clear that what you see is what you get (and what they see is an ass) so maybe that cuts down on the requests for extras.

Edited by ErosWired
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I met a really fit blond Scottish guy on Hampstead Heath one night. He suggested we go back to his place, which was the other side of London. Ordinarily, I would have said no - there’s always plenty of other catches to be had down the Heath. But the blond hair and Scottish accent swayed me. I followed in my car for an eternity, got to his and then struggled to find a parking space. 

 Anyway, we eventually get to his bedroom and start shagging. Then he stopped and asked me to give him a few minutes. He eventually came back dressed as a schoolboy. Little cap, short trousers, the whole look. He said all he wanted us to do was for me to spank him with a wooden ruler. Then his flatmate came in and sat on the edge of the bed. She looked like Kathy Burke in Gimme, Gimme, Gimme (Google her if you don’t know) and asked if she could watch! 

I drove halfway across bloody London at 2am for that. 

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I'm not sure it is the weirdest, but certainly the most frequent is to walk him on a leash, in the park, like a dog. There are a few parks around here where it is a common sight, so my refusal shouldn't hurt them that much.

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2 hours ago, RawPlug said:

I met a really fit blond Scottish guy on Hampstead Heath one night. He suggested we go back to his place, which was the other side of London. Ordinarily, I would have said no - there’s always plenty of other catches to be had down the Heath. But the blond hair and Scottish accent swayed me. I followed in my car for an eternity, got to his and then struggled to find a parking space. 

 Anyway, we eventually get to his bedroom and start shagging. Then he stopped and asked me to give him a few minutes. He eventually came back dressed as a schoolboy. Little cap, short trousers, the whole look. He said all he wanted us to do was for me to spank him with a wooden ruler. Then his flatmate came in and sat on the edge of the bed. She looked like Kathy Burke in Gimme, Gimme, Gimme (Google her if you don’t know) and asked if she could watch! 

I drove halfway across bloody London at 2am for that. 

I'm fucking crying, the "he's really hot so I'll give him the benefit of the doubt" is a real thing. But wow, his Linda flatmate showing up and watching is just weird comedy gold 🤣

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14 minutes ago, HoneyBuns1980 said:

Other than “can I see your dick?” I can’t think of anything else more weird than that to ask a total bottom. 

Actually, and this may come as a surprise, but I like to fuck a bottom face to face and look at a pretty lollipop cock while I'm breeding him... 

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3 minutes ago, rawsatyr said:

Actually, and this may come as a surprise, but I like to fuck a bottom face to face and look at a pretty lollipop cock while I'm breeding him... 

it just seems so incredibly strange to me why a top would want to give 3 shits about a bottom’s dong. You certainly don’t see any bottoms pining to see a top’s ass. 

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4 minutes ago, HoneyBuns1980 said:

it just seems so incredibly strange to me why a top would want to give 3 shits about a bottom’s dong. You certainly don’t see any bottoms pining to see a top’s ass. 

Oh I forgot to mention, I'm kinda vers and actually really turned on by tops whose cunt looks well-fucked. Most likely he took a few poz loads that day himself and that INCREASED danger thrill turns me on!

As to sexy bottoms: I'm more turned on by verbal powerbottoms with a pretty, cut dick getting hard from being penetrated or even NUTTING without touching the dick, than with "I'm justa hole!" vanilla bottoms going ass-up and doing nothing more. Same though goes for boring tops who just screw from behind and are done with it... 

As 'they say': "It takes all kinds!" But just sharing my personal angle for entertainment purposes.... 

 

 

7-16 bb (356).jpg

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2 minutes ago, rawsatyr said:

Oh I forgot to mention, I'm kinda vers and actually really turned on by tops whose cunt looks well-fucked. Most likely he took a few poz loads that day himself and that INCREASED danger thrill turns me on!

As to sexy bottoms: I'm more turned on by verbal powerbottoms with a pretty, cut dick getting hard from being penetrated or even NUTTING without touching the dick, than with "I'm justa hole!" vanilla bottoms going ass-up and doing nothing more. Same though goes for boring tops who just screw from behind and are done with it... 

As 'they say': "It takes all kinds!" But just sharing my personal angle for entertainment purposes.... 

 

 

7-16 bb (356).jpg

See, that’s the issue: it’s nice that you identify as versatile, but, they’re the ones who have the most trouble understanding that not everyone else does. Someone who is a self-identified bottom doesn’t want to be fooled by a “top” before sex, who turns out to be versatile, or even a bottom during it. That has been my experience far too long. 

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I had a guy who took me to a really cruisy park to strip me naked and specifically watch a bunch of homeless men fuck me and blow loads in me out in the open where anyone could see. he legit hate fucked me semi regularly and legit thought I was a disgusting fem whore and would often tell me I’m a “worthless piece of $hit" and that if I was his son he would have sold me as a sex slave. he was always trying to find new degrading stuff to do to me. so he prearranged for a few dirty homeless men to meet me there with him and several other homeless and regular cruisers ended up using me while he watched and told them to rape me and piss on me and ended up ramming his entire forearm up my as while I laid naked on a picnic table getting strangled and pissed on.

there is another guy who liked to dress me up as his daughters and fuck me in their actual beds. I actually look exactly like his older daughter.he also has me call him daddy and dad and he calls me by their names while he brutally sodomizes me.

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I honestly cannot think of many off the top of my head, though I am sure I have had many odd requests. One that comes to mind was a few years back, an anon cumdump used to ask if I could come wearing Converse Chucks… I found it weird that he wanted me to wear that specific sneaker, especially since it was anon and he would be blindfolded. But to each his own.

A good story- this happened to a friend of mine… he was hosting anon ass up at his house. His room was in the basement, which had a little lounging area with couches outside of his bedroom. A guy hit him up on Grindr asking if he could bottom with him. My friend says no. The guy says ok, I will come and top. The guy gets the address from my friend, shows up, sneaks in, gets undressed in the lounge area in the basement outside my friend’s room. Mind you, he came in so quietly, my friend didn’t even hear him. The guy got naked and ass up on one of the couches so HE could take the loads that my friend lined up. And it worked the first time… a top came in and started fucking this guy thinking it was my friend. My friend heard it, came out and bitched the guy out, making him leave.
 

The balls on some people huh?

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Too be honest I am quite kinky with very limited red lines, so I it hard for me to find something I can call "strange", but as a SW I met with all kinds of kinks. I once met this guy who asked me to wrestle him in bed and not allowing him having sex with me. 

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