tallslenderguy

i'm sure that's true about some Tops, but not universally? There are guys who are Tops on this site who would not only be okay with that, but would pimp you out. i think a cool thing about discussions like this is we start to identify ideas that are traditional in the straight community that we just have assumed as 'normal' or the way it is. Instead, why not 'know thyself' and know how to express that... like you just did. Being a cum dump for anyone isn't something you'll see many in the straight world admitting too, even if they are. There are indeed Tops out there who would be okay with you being such a cum dump for anyone and would love you for it. But there's more to that in a gay relationship, so i think the challenge has a lot more details, but that's a start 😉

i too have camera issues. i often look drunk or half crazed. i look at myself in the mirror and query (cause i'm queer): "Eek, do i really look like that?" i doubt you have face issues, but if you do, your sweet ass makes up for it. 🙂

Anyone else wish there were ways to meet men for actual relationship vs just hooking up for sex? BZ has come closest (for me) as being an online place to meet and have ongoing discussion and relationship, though it isn't really a dating site. i've was on OKCupid for years, but it has turned into a bot paradise and is pretty useless for meeting guys for more than sex. i watch these romantic gay movies where guys meet and fall in love, or they have a group of gay friends and i wonder if there is such a thing and how it happens?

yep, i too experience bots every time i go on A4A. i've never encountered a bot on squirt. grindr is a joke. i have never been remotely tempted to pay for grindr because their free ap is so dismal and restrictive, and has as many bots as A4A. i miss CL though it had more flakes than a snowstorm. i don't think i've ever experienced a bot on bbrt? i encountered the most sophisticated scammer on Recon. He was extremely patient and somewhat engaged and played me for about a month before trying to scam me, but eventually all the usual red flags were there. Oh, Okcupid has been over run by bots too. i even got my account hacked and taken over there, which i think is very weird. A straight guy from Europe? OKC contacted me to let me know and told me they had restored part of my profile. i got messages from women who had apparently been in contact with this guy after it was changed back. my OKCupid profile was very long and extensive because i considered it the only real dating ap i was on (vs hook up). i'm still not convinced i was actually 'hacked' and suspect that someone crossed some wires at OKC, but who knows? After my profile was ruined, i didn't have the heart or confidence to go back on that site and start over, but it had more bots than any i have been on. The site used to be pretty cool, but was messed up when Match bought them out.

Great description. When i got mine in the mail, i opened it and it say on a chair in my bedroom for several days before i cleaned out and put it in. As mentioned above, for me it would ideally be placed by a Top who's desire was to plug a bottom very deeply. The colon is about 3-5 feet long and the small intestine is about 22 feet long, so this thing does fill a lot of the colon. To me, the fact that your Boyfriend wanted you plugged with it the whole evening while you were out is fuckng awesome. i wore mine for about 30 minutes and it was quite a presence for that long, i felt plugged in a way i that is very different than ass plugs, a Top could really use this on His bottom to assert His presence deeply. Be kinda hot while out if He reached over and rubbed your belly now and then.

Leatherpunk, i think you've gotten some thoughtful and valuable input here. i deal with this kind of stuff all the time as a critical care nurse. i got a patient yesterday who came into the ED tweaking. His tox screen tested positive for meth, he denied partying to me. He was all over the map physically, arms flailing, heart racing. Of course, i don't see the guys who PnP and perceive they are having a good time, i see all the issues that arise with PnP, most common are brain damage and heart damage. People destroy their hearts beyond repair and need a transplant, but usually cannot get one because of the cause. my input is similar to many. i think you need closure and i think counseling with a grief counselor is a good idea, as well as joining a group so you won't be alone with this. Thank you for sharing this. i think your sharing this and talking about it on this site is one of the best things you can do to honor Marks memory. There is so much fantasy that happens on this site, guys romanticizing and fetishizing drugs and disease, but rarely with a balanced understanding. Your sharing your and Marks story is a sad and common outcome that our community needs to grasp. i love my gay family and i long for us to be a healthy and thriving community, not one bent on self destruction. i've been around drugs since i was 13, been at more parties than i can count, but have always been the observer, never partook. Now as a healthcare provider, i see all the people who have bad experiences, and the many who progressively kill themselves with reuse. We need to see the sadness and grief that these drugs can cause.

Yeah, in the long run, it's worth it to me. my frustration is usually with guys who don't understand that a bottom has to clean out and what's involved. They're horny, contact me and want it now. i have gotten a bottle of water when out and cleaned out in a public restroom, but going back and forth to the sink to refill can be a process lol. i'm pretty careful and tend to do deep clean outs, but i dream of having a Top who doesn't care and would just breed me whenever He wants or needs. For me, the hardest part is not eating. Once i have prepped, i don't eat until i have been bred, and there's not always a guarantee of that. i went to a gay resort in November and was only able to get to suck up until the last day i was there, they had changed their venue so the way i usually get bred (anonymous walk in from guys outside the resort) wasn't available (outsiders had to pay to get on the premises). So i had to rely on guys staying at the hotel. Didn't eat a lot that week. However, the day before i left, one guy crushed me, i left my door open and He came in and bred me wonderfully, then told others, and they bred me, so it made it all worth it.

Having a permanently changed hole. It's been changed by Tops into primarily a hole for Tops to penetrate, and i can always feel that. Love the connection i feel with a Top who 'gets it' and i can see that look in HIs eyes that He knows i am there for Him and how perfect the mutual need is from opposite directions. To me those Tops who need to put Their Self inside a cumdump vs just jack off and waste Their Self.

It's wonderful. i love a Top with a pierced cock of any sort, but have only had Tops with PA's . For me, just seeing His cock with a PA, etc., it like an extra message He is sending about the importance and status of His cock and what it is for. In my mind, cock piercings are only for Tops and piercings like taint are cool for bottoms. In my experience, the Top usually puts the PA in my pussy first, then His cock follows vs all at once. Once His cock is in, to me the PA is like a part of HIs cock. It's hard to describe for me, i see it the same as Tops who are really into Toys or FIsting, so much so that They become One with what ever They are using or attached to. i particularly love His awareness and intent of how His cock with the addition is effecting His pussy.

i still haven't done it. i've had lots of piss up my ass, and love that, having a Tops cock and contents in my pussy is always my first choice, butt having Him in me is so important that i'll take Him any way He wants or needs. Honestly, not yet having drunk piss i'm still nervous about it, but i love the Top/bottom dynamic of being in the position to take Him and Him 'training' me to take it. For me the bigger part of sex is psychological, Him penetrating and putting a part of Himself in me, so it's mind fuck for me. i suspect i will not enjoy the taste of piss... initially, that it will end up becoming one of those things where i am changed by a Tops need and desire to love it and it will become yet another need for me to have it once He has inseminated me with His piss and impregnated me with Himself. That's how it works with me, it's like a Top turns me into an addict who needs Him after conditioning me.

Ha, interesting, but true. i guess i've just been lucky. i stand corrected, shouldn't just go on my experience. Oral sex is not a common cause of infection with this bacteria. Chlamydia is less likely to be transmitted during oral sex because the bacteria that cause chlamydia prefer to target the genital area rather than the throat. This is why it is unlikely for chlamydia to be transmitted from mouth-to-penis and penis-to-mouth contact, although it is still possible. It is even less likely for transmission to take place from vagina-to-mouth or anus-to-mouth contact. Transmission is not known to occur from mouth-to-vagina and mouth to anus contact [think before following links] [think before following links] http://chlamydiacoalition.org/chlamydia-101/transmission/

Ditto you and pozguyinchi. i have a fantasy of having a Top who is so full of need and desire to breed that He doesn't care if i'm cleaned out or not. i fantasize about His sliding in and breeding me spontaneously, any time the need arises. But that's a fantasy that has never happened. i've talked to a few Tops online who share a similar fantasy, but i have to wonder how it would play out in reality? i kinda doubt i'd be able to get past the smell and mess if it happened. Maybe the embarrassment of it if it was a D/s thing? idk.

"Worthless cumdiump" is a an oxymoron to me, a contradiction of terms. I'm not saying that there are not Tops or bottoms who think there is such a thing, i'm just saying that our actions belie the term? A Top can jack himself off and cum that way, but he prefers (values) a cumdump over his hand. He spends time and effort seeking out this "worthless" person as a place to put His cock and cum. A bottom who really thought he was "worthless" would be spending his time looking for Tops to fuck his bottom friends instead of himself because he just isn't worth it lol. i think it's the other way around for both Tops and bottoms. Fucking and getting fucked, seeding and getting seeded, is a way that we affirm our value to each other and ourselves. The Top affirms the value of the bottom by putting His cock and seed in him and the bottom affirms the Tops value by prepping and showing his craving for the Top. i think it's symbiotic , even though an expression of the opposing forces of yin and yang.

lol, i read this title as someone having a 'bottom free' (i.e., no bottoms) Thursday in Chicago.

Both gonorrhea and clamydia are pretty easy to catch orally. When i get my STD checks always get an oral, anal swab and urinalysis. When i was younger, the only time i seemed to ever get an STD was from getting sucked.

This is an excellent and informative pod cast, but it doesn't answer my question. It addresses the greed of pharmaceutical companies, which i have railed against for years as a healthcare professional. my personal belief is that pharmaceutical research should not be privitized. If we took the scientists who discover meds like Truvada and Descovy, gave them a 10% raise, our cost to develop drugs would still be half by removing the profit element. It would be even less when you remove patents that sustain obscene profiteering. The claim was: "Truvada is superior over Descovy when it comes to PrEP trust me I’ve seen the data " I have not seen research evidence to support this claim. To my way of thinking, Descovy should have he patent removed and made readily available as PreP, because at this point the evidence points to it being as efficacious and having fewer deleterious side effects. Truvada costs about $60 a year to make, i am guessing Descovy is probably about as cheap, yet Gilead wants to charge $20,000.

i'm not a pharmacist, so not able to offer info from that professional perspective. But here's an excerpt from the article i cited earlier that may help? Like TDF, TAF is a, NRTI. It's a pro-drug of tenofovir, specifically designed to circulate systemically and undergo most of its conversion to tenofovir intracellularly. This results in higher active metabolite levels within HIV-infected cells and lower plasma levels. my understanding is the improved renal function is a result of putting more of the efficacious elements intracellular where it inhibits HIV reproduction vs circulating in the blood where it has deleterious effects on the kidneys?

Here's an excerpt from an article in the pharmaceutical publication Pharmacy Times on the two different forms of tenofovir I.e. Tenofovir disoproxil fumarate (TDF) an ingredient in Truvada and tenofovir alafenamide (TAF) an ingredient in Descovy. Issues with TDFDespite TDF’s being the most commonly prescribed ARV and a recommended component of most HIV treatment regimens, TDF presents several safety concerns.1,2 First, all ARVs formulated with TDF have warnings in their prescribing information for new-onset or worsening renal impairment. How this occurs is still debated, but it’s believed to be due to TDF’s toxicity to mitochondria in the proximal tubule, which leads to impaired reabsorption of low-molecular-weight proteins and other solutes.1 Consequently, physicians should assess creatinine clearance in all individuals prior to initiating therapy and assess additional lab parameters in those with previous renal events. TDF isn’t recommended for concurrent or recent use of nephrotoxic drugs (eg, high-dose or multiple NSAIDs, or aminoglycosides). The incidence of renal toxicity with TDF use is relatively low and it’s seen to be comparable with other nucleotide reverse transcriptase inhibitors (NRTI) in clinical trials.3 Despite this, there are many case studies and small case series of renal dysfunction with TDF. A second safety concern with TDF involves its effects on reducing bone mineral density (BMD). The potential mechanism for this effect is unclear; however, it may result from proximal renal tubular dysfunction causing hypophosphatemia. More recently, TDF was reported to alter both osteoblast gene expression and function.4 In clinical trials in HIV-1 infected adults and in a clinical trial of HIV-1 uninfected individuals, TDF was found to be associated with slightly greater decreases in BMD and increases in other biochemical markers of bone metabolism, suggesting increased bone turnover relative to comparator. The long-term effects of TDF on bone health and fracture risk is unknown. According to the prescribing information for TDF products, assessment of BMD should be considered for adult and pediatric patients who have a history of pathologic bone fracture or other risk factors for osteoporosis or bone loss. How TAF WorksLike TDF, TAF is a, NRTI. It's a pro-drug of tenofovir, specifically designed to circulate systemically and undergo most of its conversion to tenofovir intracellularly. This results in higher active metabolite levels within HIV-infected cells and lower plasma levels. Within the cells, it inhibits the activity of HIV reverse transcriptase by competing with natural substrates and causing DNA chain termination after being incorporated into viral DNA.5 The major difference with TDF is that it has much higher plasma tenofovir exposure, which leads to some of the safety concerns. In fact, TAF in Genvoya is formulated as one-tenth the dose of TDF in Stribild, which results in a 90% lower circulating tenofovir plasma concentration. This results in less renal dysfunction and issues with BMD.6 [think before following links] https://www.pharmacytimes.com/contributor/timothy-o-shea/2016/10/what-every-pharmacist-should-know-about-tenofovir-alafenamide

Interesting. Could you cite the data supporting your claims please?

"Cocksucker faggots are a convenient, handy tool for men" idk. i think we may often oversimplify the Top/bottom D/s dynamic in an attempt to enhance certain aspects? I.e., the Top/Dom loves, wants/needs someone to take His cock, load and the attitude of topping/dominance. i think we are often ignorant or fuzzy about the psychological aspects of the Top/bottom relationship, one of them being the seeming need for some Top/Dom to feel superior and some bottoms or subs to feel inferior. Both parties deem their position as 'better,' i.e., the bottom/sub wants to suck cock, it's not something a Top or Dom really has to force him to do lol. Hell, a bottom usually craves a Top and much of what comes with Him. i think something that often gets lost or blurred in the sexual Top/bottom exchange is the emotional and psychological needs and desires we are trying to meet. i think at it's most basic level is the expression of mutual desire and need. i think both sides want to feel needed and desired, and in that we are the same. i think the superior/inferior labels (masks?) we put on is more of a courting dance to attract than it is an expression of reality. i don't think submission logically equates to inferior, or Dominance logically equates to superior. If a bottom/sub didn't consider his role to be the better, more fulfilling role, he wouldn't be doing it. Having said all that, one of the mysteries for me of D/s is humiliation, and i think that's true about a lot of us... maybe most of us? Being affectionately humiliated, certain ways, is deeply powerful for me. i don't get it, just sort of dance around the edges of understanding it. One guy may meanly and derrogatorilly call me a "cocksucker," and do it with an attitude where i'll be completely turned off and closed to him. Another may use the same exact terms, but instead of complete distain, there is an affectionate acknowledgment of His own desire to possess me that opens me wide to Him.

This is the exact thought that came to my mind when reading the OP. There are guys in the D/s community who (on both sides) want objectification, and i see a lot less "submission" going on in that kind of dynamic and a lot more passivity. i find a lot of variation and expectation on both sides of the fence of Dom/sub. Go to a site like Recon and read profiles and many of the Dom's profiles will say "boundaries respected" while others have the expectation of absolute obedience. Honestly, i think the majority of subs have limits and a big part of D/s relationship is "pushing limits." i don't see D/s as simple or subject to the strict black or white definitions some want to use to structure them. One form of D/s relationship is the expectation that whatever the Dom says, goes. There is another form though where the Dom doesn't so much expect submission as He wants to elicit submission from His sub. Either way, in order for "submission" to take place, there has to be volition and someone there who is actually submitting. Personally, i land on the latter form. To me, part of the fun and erotic turn on of D/s is the process of a Dom getting into my head ("mind fuck") and Him gaining control and getting me to submit. i want to submit, but to me "submission" requires there be substance to submit The Dom's i have had relationship with have wanted that too. They don't just want a mindless play thing, but a challenge that exercises their Dominant nature. In the OP's case, i'd say the behavior of trying to manipulate or control a top into breeding him is more of a Dom attitude. Wanting or needing to be bred is different than controlling to get bred. i think the more developed and understanding Dom gets His subs needs and uses those to control and elicit submission from His sub.

my take on 'love' is it's unconditional. I.e., we take a person as they are. That is simple (but hard), looks good on paper, and is one of the biggest challenges of relationship in my opinion. For me, my top priority in relationship is compatibility because i don't believe in trying to change someone, or vice versa, because of "love." To me, that isn't really love, it turns a relationship more quid pro quo. You are in relationship with a couple of guys who, for whatever reasons, want/need and are having raw, bareback sex with other guys. i get that you are "conflicted" because these are guys you care about and want in your life. my guess (and it's only a guess) is that, on some level they know you disapprove of what they are doing, so they hide and lie about it. i.e., they too are "conflicted." They too know the consequences of "raw dogging" and to them "the consequences" (apparently) are worth it. Seems to me you guys are sexually incompatible. Based on what you have written, i don't think PreP is the answer for you. Don't get me wrong, i think PreP is pretty essential if you're having penetrative sex, especially as a bottom, because you have NO control over your partner/s. Yes, there are guys out there who believe in and are monogamous, but nothing is absolute. This isn't the case with you though. You already know that your partners are having hook up sex. If you stay with them and have sex with them, sooner or later, the odds are you're going to get an STD. From what you have written, i think you need to change the form of relationship you have with these guys to platonic and find someone you can be monogamous with for the sexual part of your life. This goes beyond STD's for you. Psychologically, you are feeling "used" by who and how they are. i'd wager if they managed to not have hookup sex for awhile, they too would feel "used" and the same sort of resentment and hurt would develop. i don't think ether side is 'good' or 'bad,' it think it's a question of compatibility. It looks to me that a closed polyamorous relationship would be more suited to your desires and needs. i'm not one to throw out the baby with the bath water, i.e., an all or nothing scenario with your current guys. Clearly, you're all getting something from the relationship, so i'd look for ways to remove the elements of conflict. Would there still be something of value left if sex was taken out of the picture?

There is an erotic side to this for me, the mind fuck of a Top or Dom engineering and putting their bottom in a desperate position where they end up wetting their pants, but this vid kinda of missed the mark for me. How "desperate" could the guy have been? He was sitting in a bath tub lol.

this is a pic of me peeing through mine https://assets.s3xstatic.com/bz/uploads/monthly_2019_12/IMG_0846.JPG.a1623fdb9bbb58ec0e555cd4f757d758.JPG

no, i didn't have a mother like her, women sort of creep me out sexually. would love a guy fb like her though