tallslenderguy

I'd like to clarify that to me "stealthing" constitutes deception, it's not the equivalent of anonymous sex. To my way of thinking, if I choose to indulge i anonymous sex, I assume all the risks with that, including contracting an STI. If someone asks me if I am positive, I tell them, but I don't wear a sign around my neck, ring a bell and declare "unclean." If someone wants to have sex with me using a condom, I decline, because sex without cum is incomplete for me, coitus interuptus. The fact that sex is a two way street means both parties are responsible for their self, not the other. If a person expresses to me that they are concerned about STI's and they ask, I will tell them the truth. If they don't ask, then that demonstrates to me that it is not an issue for them. To me, stealthing is the purposeful deception of another person who has asked, or implied by insisting on a condom, for the intent of loading them with a poz load. It's not about the person being poz, but them making a deceptive effort to poz someone who has made it clear they don't want to be poz.

PS i like the fact that we discuss stuff like this here,

Ditto to the many who state it's not ok. Most of us here do not follow normative standards of morality, but that doesn't mean amoral. purposefully trying to poz someone without their consent is wrong. Is it okay to break someone's leg or punch them in the gut (sans permission, lol, some may want that, though I can't see myself finding that okay ), or how about add poison to their drink? I think it's pretty basic, stealthing is purposeful intent to do harm because HIV is a disease, he'll, is wanna know if someone had the flu before kissing them lol

I would say sure, there are some where there is a correlation, but would not equate that with a generalized cause and effect. I think it's a valid question though. Maybe even go a step further: "is self esteem enough for anyone?" I.e., people are social and we need each other. At what point does need become an aberration? Gays represent a social group/culture that has had to question and challenge the norm in order to exist, so barebacking could also be an expression of high self esteem? I am guessing you are implying the risk of HIV? Back before antibiotics, diseases like syphilis and gonorrhea were an issue for anyone (straight or gay). Was it low self esteem for them to engage in bare, non-monogamous sex or was it just going along with ones sex drive? And, even though the risk is less, there is still risk to a top for catching HIV, so we could also ask: "are tops with low self esteem more likely to agree to bareback sex?" Then there's the fact that HIV, syphilis and gonorrhea all have treatments now, it's no longer a devastating thing. I find the whole gay drive, bottom or top, to be fascinating. Evolutionary theory sums up the straight sex drive to survival of the species, which doesn't work for gays in either position. Unless we start considering other factors of survival, like pleasure, connectedness, etc..

I can't imagine, though my experience is tops are pickier than bottoms. Or it just may seem that way because there are way more bottoms that tops, the percentage of picky may be the same, just that 50% of a thousand is a lot more than 50% of ten lol. You may just be experiencing what us bottoms experience all the time... though I do get that you qualify "lately." Idk, you look hot to me.

My guess is these are guys who think they're pretty hot and have romantic notions. Idk, but obviously they are not "cum sluts" if they have a qualifier on it, like "cum slut for hot models only" or ________________? I will take cock and cum from anyone who can fuck and breed, but I won't let most guys kiss me (I'm not a kiss slut). Funny, I have a top who has an awesome cock and brags about his ability to fuck for hours, but he's had his prostate removed and claims he does not ejaculate anything. So, I have demurred several times when he has cruised me. It frustrates the hell out of me to get fucked and not get cum or piss. Weird? Idk, I'm a cum slut, but I guess not a total cock slut? I don't quite understand that because I am interested in getting fisted, though I have yet to take a whole hand yet. I am really turned on by a tops lust and desire to open me up, that is almost as hot as getting bred to me. Maybe it has something to do with him leaving his 'mark' on me, so to speak? But I am pickier about who I let do that, but not picky at all about who breeds me. I haven't even seen 90% of the guys who have bred me, always laying face down or through a GH, or back to them. TMI? lol

Like others have voiced, nah. Not that I never felt those things, but I have changed. The standards I held as "true" or "right" just aren't that clear cut anymore. Guys that may have 'disgusted' me in the past, I've come to appreciate. I love guys who love to fuck and breed, who love ass... that's pretty much my standard now. I do wish i hadn't cheated on my former wife, but I am pretty forgiving of myself even though I think what I did was wrong (by my standards). But I was also in a rotten position, grew up in a culture that equated who I am with being "broken" and "sinning." It took me awhile to process through all of that, but meanwhile, I still had a sex drive, so I cheated and then lied about it. I hated myself the whole time, for years (most of my life). I don't anymore. I'm not even disgusted by what I did, I get it. I was only disgusted when I had some beliefs that kept me from living.

Works for me... i love being the bottom missionary style. my favorite is to be lying naked and face down, anonymous walk in breeding. I'm tall and doggie style is hard on my knees, plus there's the mind fuck part of it where I am more under the top, kinda under his control in missionary. plus there is no question of being a total bottom. the top who wants me missionary style obviously just wants my hole to breed and isn't interested in my cock, i can't touch it (not that i would anyway), but it's totally focused on hole breeding. so, that's not a problem for me (_0_)

Not me, i can usually keep it in no problem... especially if it's deep. I've been stealth pissed in at a ABS before through a GH and then been bred by others after, not realizing I've been pissed in until later when I get home... it's so fucking hot to find out that way.

Oh fuck yeah, balls deep. It's not just a physical thing, it's the hole idea of the top wanting to get in as deep as he can to make his deposit... like his survival depends on it. I want his cum (or piss) in me so deep that it's more likely to be absorbed than leak out. I love the feel and idea of a tops substance becoming a part of me. Before he cums, I think it's hot when a top likes to play with a hole and express himself. Some like to grind deep, some like to keep pulling out and going in so they can gape and see the hole respond to them. Some like to slap their balls against my taint. It's all fucking hot, but love it deep when they finally let go and leave a part of their self in me.

last couple of hours at the ABS. 4 outta 6 of the guys wanted bj, so I got 4 oral loads and then 2 up the ass. #5 had a sweet, fat cock and I asked him into my booth so i could get the whole thing vs using just the GH. While I was sucking him a guy stuck his cock through the GH and said to back my ass up while I sucked the other guy. I did that till the first guy got hard enough to fuck, then offered him my ass. he slid in and came pretty quickly while the other guy watched through the GH. after he left, i just kept the door open and continued to assume the position and the guy watching through the GH came over and gave me load #6 and left. place was empty after that, thinking of driving to the big city (Portland) and going to one of the bath houses. feeling kinda limp and used and wanting more.

Interesting. I've had plenty of opportunity to be with women, but not really had strong enough desire to go through with it. I was married to a woman for a big chunck of my life, so have had plenty of man/woman sex, but she is the only woman I have ever been with. Two opportunities that stand out to me are a woman I dated right after my divorce. I thought I might be Bi, so I didn't limit my dating to men. Any women I have dated have not been heteronormative though. The first woman was a German visiting professor. She was teaching womens studies at UI. She was lesbian one of the primary leaders of the lesbian community in Germany and she shifted and discovered one day that she wanted to be with a man. I liked her and she wanted sex with me, but I just didn't feel it, so she moved on because she wanted sex. The other was a woman to man transgender person. I really liked this person a lot, but despite my cerebral acceptance of this person being a man in a womans body, there was something about him that just reminded me of being with a woman (besides the vagina). I never had sex with him either because he never completely struck me as a guy. I also had a crush on one of the doctors at work, thought he was really cute and loved his personality. He was gone for awhile and came back to work as a woman. That was mind bending for me, to realize I had a crush on someone I perceived as male who ended up being a woman. I still think she's cute, but I don't find I have the same feelings anymore.

im a pretty complete bottom and have fantasized about no cock at all. Have had a few Doms who referred to my cock as a "clit" and talked to me about having only a "pussy." The idea is a turn on for me, but more fantasy than anything. For me it's a power exchange thing, but have had so pretty hot hook up responses with this pic.

lol, love this post and your sense of humor about it. I don't think this experience identifies or qualifies you anywhere near "prude." The truth is, a complete blackout does not constitute "complete sensory depravation," just visual. You still have your sense of touch, sound, smell and taste. In this case, it seems like your sense of smell did you in, and it also even took you back into a place of 'seeing' because it allowed you to identify the person trying to kiss you and you still had a picture of him in your brain. So, in a way, you 'saw' him. My guess is that ignited your imagination in the wrong direction, and all you imagined was unattractive to you? In some ways I think of myself as very "piggy," but many a 'pig' would disagree because I don't like strong smells. If someones breath is "bad" to me, I am turned off, same with pits or crotch. Same with taste. If a guys cock or ass tastes like it hasn't been cleaned in a week, I find it pretty disgusting... though, if I have a guys cock in my mouth, I'm not gonna give it up because of taste or smell, i will still suck it in hopes of being bred or at least getting his load lol, but I won't enjoy it quite as much. But I'll turn away if it's his breath, pits, ass or any other part of him.

I'm practically all bottom, and mostly anally oriented at that. Not very oral, but I can be that way and if I am going to suck a cock, I'm gonna be attentive and purposeful. Same with eating an ass. I don't think I'm very piggy. But I have piggy tendencies? For instance, I love to be pissed in and on, but not in my mouth? Not into strong smells, I like clean and showered, top or bottom. I've eaten some, smooth little bubble butts and could have died happy doing it. If I smell the smallest amount of scat, I am turned off. If I encounter cum, I'll likely play with it with my tongue, but will prolly leave it in the hole out respect for the breeder... I know, it's just me. That's the limited extent of my eating ass. As a bottom, my legs spread and my ass lifts to any top who wants it. I fucking love a top who likes to start out by eating my hole. My favorite are tops who get into leaving their signature on my hole. It makes me crazy wild when I can feel that kind of energy from my top, whether they are using their mouth, cock, toy, hand, if I can feel their energy through it, I am involuntarily moaning and all theirs. Some of the most awesome fucks i have had start or end (or both) with having my hole eaten out. My feel is it is not so much that they are trying to get any cum out that someone else may have left, but that they are literally changing my hole, i.e., eating my hole out. These are the guys that, when they leave, my hole is wet, sloppy, gaping and often looks distinctly like a swollen pussy with lips. IOW, it looks different than they found it, they have left their mark on it, and i fucking love that.

Ditto the others who ave suggested professional couples counseling. Your initial question: "should I just be happy?" is not cerebral decision in my experience. I am a non-traditionalist. I often say that being gay delivered me from "God." I grew up in a very religious culture that didn't recognize there was even such a thing as being gay, but rather considered it a choice. So I tried to fit myself into a traditional life, wife, kids, etc.. But who I am did not fit into traditional ways, so I spent a lot of time and energy processing though who I am and learning how to live a happy, healthy life. I originally thought, after I divorced, that I'd find a guy to be a partner with. It was part of my cultural up bringing that I just transferred from my straight life to my gay life, but I have never been partnered with a guy in any traditional sense of the word, and I am perfectly happy. I am not opposed to it, but I don't feel a need for it either. I think friendship is highly underrated. I've dated one of the heads of the lesbian movement in Germany, we never had sex (she wanted it, I didn't), but it was a great relationship. I dated a transgender (woman to man) person, same thing. I've considered polyamory, but that just seems an extension of monogamy to me. For me (and I know this is just me) I've pretty much decided that it is improbable that anyone can get all their wants or needs met with one person. Having an expectation that another person meet a need/want, leads to disappointment when it doesn't happen. Simple statement, I know. I am not saying that you have the expectation that your husband meet all your wants or needs, but you do have the expectation that he have sex with you, and he does not. I think counseling could help you identify why you have that need/want, and he does not, then maybe figure out if one of you can change, or both somewhat, or change the relationship?

After reading and seeing pics from guys like Fistulike666 on this site, I bought a set of sounds. The pics were just too hot to resist. I love tops and want to be able to provide this play for tops who lead with their cocks but like sounding. Also, as a slutty fuck hole, it makes sense to me to pursue this, can't believe it's taken me so long? I remember as a kid I had a naturally kinky side. I'd put a bicycle pump up my ass and pump air in, just to see how it felt. Lots of enema. I remember shooting water into my cock even. As I went along, I just got more oriented to my ass hole as a sex organ, but am interested in finding my prostate with a sound, especially with something in my ass.

Like others here have alluded, I think it depends on what culture or sub culture you belong to. It's the norm in our subculture here on BZ, but not the baptist church down the street, and prolly never will be there. Some cultures will always associate shame with sex and use bacterial infection as 'proof' that it's wrong. You can get and spread a bacterial infection from touching a contaminated surface at a restaurant, but I'm not going to stop eating out. I can get and spread a bacterial infection having sex with another person, but I'm not going to stop having sex.

Wow, damn. Thanks for posting this iamtheone. It reminds me of when the Nazis took over in Berlin. Before the Nazis, Berlin was very liberal. After they threw gays in concentration camps. There are always certain people who hate us, often hiding under the surface, give them power and this is how they use it.

I got this the L'amoure Rose Vibe, a pricey prostate toy. It is touted by 'experts' (lol) as on of the most powerful prostate massager/vibrater. It's definitely got the most powerful vibrator for it's size that I have experienced. My only complaint is I wish it was bigger. When you read through the reviews, many of the guys talk about how big it is and how it's kinda hard to get in. Even a gay guy who has a site that reviews toys talked about it as though it is not for beginners because of it's size. These guys are obviously not sluts with well exercised holes lol. I'm a thousand miles from being a "beginner, but I don't consider myself advanced either. I've not yet been able to take a fist and some larger toys are either not possible (yet), so I was hoping this would be a good toy for me. I really like it, and if I sit on it just right it enhances its effects, but the truth is, it is too small for me an "intermediate?" Which is kinda frustrating. I read reviews of how this toy gives mind numbing hands free assgasms... not. I can feel the potential, but have yet to experience that. It's not like it gets lost inside of me, lol, but it just seems shy of being big enough. Both bigger head diameter and length would have worked for me.

Yeah. I'm one of those guys who did. I watched my brother die a horrible death from AID's during the early 80's. I was married (to a woman). I was caught in the cultural web of religion that prevented me from self acceptance. Even in the face of horrible disease, faithfulness to a person I love/loved, and 'God' (rolls eyes), I still took loads. I'd fight the desire, often with tears and crushing shame and guilt, praying to be "delivered," but would find my self in a restroom stall offering my ass to a cock slid underneath the partition or bending over to receive a cock protruding from a glory hole. When I finally processed through my ethnocentricity and accepted myself, the obsessiveness dropped away, but not the desire (need?). For me, my sex drive supersedes any cognitive desire or ideal that might oppose it. I write that, not bragging, but matter of factly. I may have developed differently had I not had so many cultural imperatives to get over. For me, sex was my only means of affirmation for years. If I had had self acceptance early on, my sex drive may have been more controlled, I don't know. For me, the threat of hurting my wife, who I desperately didn't want to hurt, displeasing "God" (which just turned out to be my ideas of "God") and a horrible disease and death were not enough to keep me from taking loads. I'd probably taken thousands before the successful meds came out. On a side note, I've only been poz and on meds for about a year.

This guy knows what he is doing. He found my horny button and is expert at playing with it and turning up the volume.

"Familiarity breeds contempt?" (butt at least it still breeds) The only ltr i have been in was being married to a woman, and she was the only woman I have ever had sex with. I started cheating with guys about 6 years into the relationship. I hated myself for cheating, but I couldn't help myself and at the time I was religious and believed I just needed to change. Not on topic, just some background. Something I did notice was sex was always hotter and I usually wanted to have sex with my wife right after being with a guy. I never fantasized or mentally brought a guy into the bedroom with me and my wife, it was more like that part of me had been satisfied with a guy so it wasn't in the way with my wife? IDK. I've had plenty of opportunity to be with women since being divorced, but no interest in sex with women. I have noticed a difference when it comes to regular or long term FB's. Like you, I still enjoy the sex, mainly because I enjoy the load and any dependable source of breeding is "good." I'm pretty adventurous, so have no problem trying to introduce new stuff/kink into the mixture, but most of the regular fb's I have had usually get stuck in a groove (so to speak), and I'm cool with that, definitely better than nothing. One of the things I like about being out and free is I can question the status quo. I question how and why the gay community often tries to copy straight tradition, like we're trying to get social approval by conforming to what they deem "respectable". I kinda doubt monogamy is a good idea and I don't have it as an ideal or goal. I don't think it's reasonable to think any one person can fulfill all of another persons needs. To me, life is fluid, ever changing and flowing and living means affecting and being affected as we flow past one another. It's not a perfect analogy for me, but I don't expect anyone to be everything for me in any given moment, so I am not disappointed when they are not. It makes more sense to me to get pieces of what we need from one another, rather than trying to get all or lots even. Consequently, I'm pretty damned happy if I get a cock with cum in my ass. If the guy happens to be hot looking to me, it's an added benefit, but it doesn't take away from the experience if it's not there, because I am not looking for it. Conversely, I have pretty much embraced my inner, kinky, slut and am not shy about suggesting kinks to perfect strangers or ltr fb's. But if one guy doesn't get off on pissing up my ass, there are 5, or 10 or 15 other guys out there who will, so monogamy seems like a formula for failure to me.

I got syphillis a couple of years ago, saw the rash and went to a doc-ina-box to get treatment. The doctor was young and asked if I minded if he showed the rash to another doc, which was cool with me in the interest of learning and science, neither had ever actually seen a case of syphillis lol. Syphilis is reportable, so I got contacted by the health dept a couple of times. Same story as many here relate, but my sex is pretty much all hook up and anonymous, so there were no numbers or names to give out. I did tell any regular fuck buddies vs giving info to the health dept. On another note, I was treated with doxycycline because the medical office didn't have the penicillin shots. A year and a half later I tested poz for HIV and went ahead and got tested for everything else too. They test for antibodies to the bacteria that causes syphillis, but because they didn't know my baseline, I went ahead and got retreated, 2 shots of penicillin a week for 3 weeks. I moved from VA to OR and VA is where I had the contact with the health dept. No one has ever contacted me in OR.

I go back and forth on this. First off, after 30 years of getting fucked, my hole is definitely more permanently open. I read a lot of guys here whose experience is their hole goes back to tight. Mine sure doesn't. I don't know if it's because of the frequency that I get fucked or because of the larger toys I have used, but my hole is doesn't have nearly the tightness it used to, both the opening and internally. And I don't work it or get fucked daily. When I am working (13 hour shifts), I don't have time to get fucked or play, just eat, sleep and work. I work one week on, then have one week off, so usually on my first day off I am horny as fuck and want as much as I can get. I have a long, flexible shower douche. It's pretty slender, about finger size. Once I start douching, my opening opens right up and for the life of me feels just like a pussy, i.e., it's a slit with lips vs a round puckered hole. It takes almost no time at all for me to get a good sized dildo in if I think I'm going to be taking a big cock, also, I do a big, long dildo to make sure any water past the inner sphincter is all out. But my hole opens right up, not at all like it used to be.... This all seems fairly recent, like within the last year or so. It may have to do with the size of toys I have used. I have little to no desire to open my own hole, my hole is very connected to my tops. About a year ago I had a Dom top approach me on asspig and he started initiating hole training with me. It was all online, which wasn't very fulfilling, but I'm enough of a sub slut that I went along with him to some degree. He encouraged me to get bigger toys in order to open my hole more, and it's my impression that using those toys, even for just the short time I did, permanently opened me more. I still have muscle control, maybe even more from exercising clenching those toys, so I can milk and squeeze a tops cock when he's in me, but my opening is not as tight as it used to be and never returns to that tightness. My inner hole varies. Sometimes it gets swollen and puffy inside, I imagine that must feel pretty good on a cock, other times it feel like a cave to me and there are certain types of tops who find that incredibly hot... which is the only reason I'd do it. Bottom line, so to speak, I "train" my hole only in response to a particular top who I am wanting to please. Without that guy, I don't train to open it, feels to much like fucking myself and I am too much of a bottom to top myself lol. A lot of it for me has to do with the energy dynamic (cerebral) of the top/dom who wants to kind of put his signature on my hole, I am very responsive to that, but again, I do it to please the top/dom involved.